I'm gonna make this clear. ME NO OWN. There.

Sasuke: Wow, you're actually serious this time.

Me: Well duh. I'm going to thank the people who reviewed at the bottom. 'kay? And I'm sorry for not updating.

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Last Time:

"PLEASE!" Lee suddenly shouted. He had two HUMONGY lumps on his head,"PLEASE! BE MY GIRLFRIEND!" He was begging Sakura to be his girlfriend. After 191654619684654676454647965 pleases, he had 3546516576565 lumps on his head and no Sakura, and after Sakura said 61651659846531351465486476646 nos, she had a throbbing hand and a big grin plastered on her fist.

Back to Kakashi:

Kakashi started to back away but got cornered into a very very small corner. So he started to wimper like a lost puppy, or should I say lost Kakashi, and tears were spilling down his cheeks (or should I say mask).

Gai was grinning maniacly and laughing like a mad scientist.

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Chapter 3: Cooking Paradise Part 2

"AHHH!" screamed a certain youth, "MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR!"

Everybody turned their heads toward Sakura and Lee. There, in the spotlight of everything, was Lee, his head shining because of the baldness his head gathered.(Thankies to chuunin alchemist for the idea!)

Then everybody turned there head towards Sakura's way, and saw her holding Lee's wig and doing her victory dance.

"LEE! MY YOUTHFUL STUDENT! WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR STYLISH AND SEXY HAIR(I just HAD to put that there)!" screamed a heart broken youthful sensei. He and Lee and had tears running down their face.

Kakashi rolled his eyes. 'Why is everybody crying?' he thought, when suddenly Naruto took one of Gai's books.

"AHH! IT BURNS!" shouted Naruto, covering his eyes from the err...disturbing picture he was looking at.

"What is it dobe?" asked Sasuke, in his slick voice. He took the book from Naruto's hands and looked inside.

"YOU'RE RIGHT! IT BURNS!" Sasuke threw the book into a tree just for it to fall back down on the ground right infront of the two boys and the book was turned to a certain page.

"Hey hey, don't do that. You might damage it and Gai won't let me borrow his 'stuff' anymore," said Kakashi.

You might be wondering what was on that page, but I'll let your nasty imagination take over. Joking. It was a picture a two chickens humping each other. The chickens looked suspiciously like Gai and Lee.

"What are you guys looking at?" questioned Sakura, walking towards them.

"Sakura my love! How could you! You took my hair and now you're walking away!" wailed Lee, banging his fists on the ground while rolling on nature's floor. Right now, mother nature must be barfing in disgust.

"Sakura-chan! Don't come near the book!" warned Naruto, but it was too late.

"Ahh! My eyes! Kakashi-sensei! How could you READ such a book?" screamed Sakura. Man, did she have a high pitched scream. Higher then Ino's, that's for sure. She took the book and threw it in a tree a certain Neji was sitting in.

Suddenly they heard a higher-pitched scream.

"AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! GET THIS, THIS THING AWAY FROM ME! THIS IS EVEN WORSE THEN SEEING LEE AND GAI BATHE TOGETHER!"

All of them turned their heads towards the tree.

"Neji?" asked Tenten, walking towards the tree. Then a book fell on her head.

"OWWW..." Tenten rubbed her head. Then she took the book and looked at the unturned page.

"EEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!OMG THEY LOOK SO MUCH LIKE GAI AND LEE!"

By now Gai and Lee stopped crying. They had question marks on their face and on top of their heads.

"What looks like us?" asked Lee, rubbing his well shined head.

"Nothing," everyone said in unison.

"Lee, how do you keep your head so shiney?" asked Neji.

Everybody looked at Neji with wide eyes.

"What? Can't I ask questions? Emerald!"

Me: Yes?

Neji: Can I ask questions?

Me: You already did.-leaves-

"SEE?" whined Neji. He wanted his answer.

"Well Neji, I made this head polish which has special ingredients in it. Let me tell you them: Granola bars, cooking oil, water, sugar, ham, eggs, icecream, fish oil, piece of Gai-sensei's hair(at this point Gai was crying over his piece of hair), shoe polish and toe nails," replied Lee, saying that with his memory.

Then after he said that, a couple of hawks dove in to peck on his head because, as he said, he added granola bars, sugar, ham, eggs and icecream. Since the hawks were hungry, they started pecking, and everybody started to go home, leaving poor, poor Lee to suffer.

But Gai stopped. He said to Kakashi, "My dear rival, may I ask, where is my book?"

Kakashi looked at the pile of poop the hawks had done. He saw a page of the book in there and pointed.

"On second thought, you can keep it," Gai shuddered.

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Gai: Or the Review Monster will get you.

Me: Now now Gai, don't be so cruel. True, there is a Review monster, but it only eats reviews, not eat the person.

Kakashi: Phew.

Reviewers:

Trenchcoatgirl-Kyo: Thanks! Hope you liked this chapter!

Vampirewitch: No, she doesn't wear makeup.

Michelle: Hehehe...

i-x3-shikamaru: That would be the day! He's too youthful..-shudder-

kittyclaw: Math problems? Sure...

xbakatare: Thankies!

chuunin alchemist: Thankies for the idea! Can I call you Panda bear? joking

Ja!

Emerald Pools