As always, thanks to the magnificient Angela, because she so totally is!

Notes: Some dialogue lifted from various episodes, Condemned being the latest one. Oh, and loving the comments, keep 'em coming :)

Nature

"Don't talk to me about screwed!"

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"Kolyaaaaaaaaa!"

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"Oh God, no no no no no. no please, please don't! Oh God! Stop! Stop! It's the grounding rods! We're going to use them to power the shield! That's all! That's all! Stop!"

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"Major!"

"McKay!"

"Ok now what!

"Well reload!"

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"I do not understand."

"It was very easy to miss. In fact, I couldn't even make the kind of comparison necessary to isolate the specific strand. We needed Wraith cells, which we eventually got, but then we need a full mapping of the genetic code contained within those cells, which wasn't even fifty percent complete..."

"Please! Tell me."

"You have some Wraith DNA in your genetic make-up."

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Ronon sat, avidly soaking in life on Atlantis before he came, the missions of the team before he joined. It was incredible they were still alive! So many things he had only heard about, he now was privileged enough to see and experience alongside them. Hour after hour, he kept his eyes on the screen, the thought of turning away, allowing them their secrets and privacy long gone. The images had evolved. No longer coming from one mind, they melded and meshed, going from one perspective to the next in a seamless second. One event seen through three different pairs of eyes. Different perceptions of the same event, colours changing as they did. Sometimes, one was angry and coated everything with a deep blood red whilst the other was afraid and turned everything to black.

He remembered the next one and was amazed at sharing it with them in this manner. He had hated that man and so had Sheppard. When McKay's thoughts came, everything coated itself in black but it came with a line of yellow that was quite intriguing. Teyla was anger, pure and simple. He knew he had been too, wanting to kill that man for what he proposed. What colour would his thoughts have produced?

"Choose."

"Choose what?"

"Which one of them dies first. Do it."

"I can't do that."

"Well then I'll choose for you. Either way, one of them dies unless you change your mind about fixing that ship."

He saw everything and wanted more. When the squish released them, he was sorry for a moment before guilt overpowered any other emotion. What had he been doing! Not looking for a way out, not attempting to find the voice's owner. Sitting like a voyeur, spying on their lives, on their thoughts and feelings! What would they think if they knew! He moved to assist as the wall regurgitated his team.

McKay fell to the ground, clutching his head. The last image had been one he shared with Sheppard, down in the depths of the ocean. Fear had coated it from both sides. He had been sitting in the back of the Jumper while Sheppard brought them to the surface. Zelenka had gone between one and the other. Sheppard had talked more than he usually did, a non-stop babbling better suited to McKay.

"Ow. Shit, that hurts!"

Ronon was at his side, helping him to sit up. Sheppard sat silently and Teyla forced herself to move despite the flashes of memories chasing one another through her mind. Loss and fear and fear and loss, running around her in her head. Violence, blood, death calling out to her from the merry-go-round of life experiences. She kneeled beside Rodney who held his head in his hand, pressing in as if he could push the pain away.

"Are you in pain?"

"Yes, goddamnit all to hell, I'm in pain! How long have we been in there?"

He looked at Ronon who was, quite obviously, the most alert of them all. Wide, annoyed and blue were, at the present time, the eyes that Ronon had seen filled with fear, hate, tears, curiosity, impatience and hurt. Blue eyes he'd seen widen for all kinds of reason, both in life and on the screen. It was a flood of memories and most were not his! A frown marred McKay's face. He expected an answer.

"Don't know. Can't tell the time."

"Right." He looked around, but his eyes fell on Ronon again. "How come you're not on the floor, or at the very least a little unstable? You're Super Macho 'I feel no pain' deal can't stretch that far, right? Even Teyla's winded and Sheppard looks like death warmed over."

"Hey!" The embodiment of death was not happy with the comparison.

"I wasn't in there."

"What! How come?" That was unfair, wasn't it? No sense dwelling on it, as least the Mighty Warrior had been out to protect their hides!

Helping Teyla to a sitting position, Ronon was denied his preferred means of communication, the shrug, and had to speak. "I don't know."

Rodney was dwelling. "That's not fair! How come you get to be out here?" He swept his arm out, encompassing their not so impressive environment. He wrinkled his nose at what he saw and gave a little disgusted sniff. "Yeah, well, I guess it's not that bad in there, not like anything happens."

Shortly after, food materialised, as it had the first time. They sat and ate in silence. Sheppard ate a little bit of everything except the red, overly juicy fruit and Ronon knew why. He had loved those, whilst trapped in the little house with five copies of himself, waiting, wanting to die. Ronon knew what had happened to him and it made him even gladder that he had killed the woman who would put his friend through such an ordeal.

Once they had finished, the trays disappeared but the voice did not speak. They sat in oppressive silence until McKay broke it.

"What happens to us?"

They looked at him incredulously but his eyes were fixed to the ground. When he received no answer, he raised his head and gazed at Ronon. "When we're in there, what happens?"

Teyla and Sheppard were watching him too and Ronon did not know what to say. If he told them the truth, they would want to stop it and he couldn't let it happen. He needed more, wanted more. Wanted to see everything! No, oh no, he would not jeopardise their lives so he could spy on them! However, he was not ready to tell them, didn't know what he could say to allow for his earlier silence. He should've told them right away, it was too late now.

"Nothing much…you just sleep."

"Nothing. There's no light or significant power increase or…"

"I haven't seen anything. Can't see power."

"Well, next time, you should take the scanner and verify. It must be doing something and I for one would really like to know. It could be slowly killing us, rotting us from the inside or something!"

"McKay!" Sheppard was disgusted by the idea, but would not pass up the chance for a one-up on the scientist. "I thought you said it wasn't dangerous?"

"There's a big difference between scientific experimenting in a controlled environment and living in Jell-O!" His argument was weak by his chin lifted in belligerence.

"Oh, is that what is it? A controlled environment?"

"I'm conscious, aren't I! Then, I control my environment!"

Sheppard thought about arguing, but if it made the scientist feel better to believe he controlled his environment, he was not going to disagree and alarm him by appearing anything but confident. "Yeah, ok…point."

Ronon watched Rodney smile smugly and appreciated Sheppard's adroit handling of the man. "I'll check, next time."

Silence, again.

Sheppard could not handle it, he needed to do something. "We should get some rest. I'll take first watch."

That seemed to jolt them out of their quiet contemplations. "Anybody have Tylenol in their vests? This headache is killing me!"

When none was found, McKay sighed and went off to one side. Emptying his pockets, he rolled the vest and gently laid his head upon it. One arm went over his eyes. He listened for the others to settle down, concentrating on his environment so he would not have to face what lurked inside his mind. Rare were the times when he disliked his brain, but he did at that moment. Stupid brain, couldn't even hold on to his repression! I don't want to remember! Take It away! It was working fine before, why are you playing games with me, on a mission no less.

He thought it was evident that it had something to do with the squish and the many hours they had spent there, but Ronon hadn't seen anything out of the ordinary. Sure, there was the power increase which was quite intriguing, but he couldn't check it out with Lieutenant Colonel Dictator of the World there. Maybe during Teyla's watch. She hadn't said anything about it and the chances of side effects were dwindling as time passed. It was everywhere; it would've affected them by now. His mind offered a flash of his father's angry face. Ok, brain, stop it! Do something useful, like, solve those Millennium Problems and prove to everyone how truly, amazingly intelligent you are. Then, Dad can eat his damn suit and tie for being such an ignorant bastard! He'd sure like me then, wouldn't he, if I won millions upon millions and everybody sang my praises. Everyone would recognise that I'm…no, that is not an accepted subject. Millennium Problems. Right.

Teyla watched Rodney settle in his spot as if he had reached a decision of some kind. So, final. She wondered if it was that simple for him; would he sleep if he simply decided to do so? Perhaps, it would be a useful skill, one that she wished upon herself tonight. It had been years since she had thought of her family in any unpleasant way. She usually recalled their happier times. Village festivities, family suppers, hunting trips. No, the thoughts that plagued her tonight involved too much death, too little happiness. Where had they come from? Was the Colonel's mood descending upon them all? Possibly, stranger things had been known to happen. Mood affecting mood, it was a likely possibility. Yes, even Ronon seemed out of sorts. She wondered if he remembered unpleasantries as well.

Of course he did. He ran the memories through his mind, trying to see more than what was there, trying to understand.

Sheppard stalked the area they occupied with slow, measure step. Left. All the people he had lost. Right. All the people that had lost him. Left. Mom. Right. That bastard father. Left. Grodin. Right. Ford. Left. Andy. Right. Isabelle. It wouldn't stop so he walked and watched his team. Their names weren't on that list. They had come close numerous times, but they weren't. Ok, John, forget about all those that came before. The only important thing right now is them. You're on a mission, you're on watch and there's something rotten in the state of Jell-O. Concentrate.

Left. Teyla. Right. Rodney. Left. Ronon. Right. Teyla. Left. Rodney. Right. Ronon. His eyes rested on the body that wore the name and he managed to forget all the memories that wanted to surface.