Notes: Getting there, slowly but surely. Should manage to get it all posted soon :) Thanks for your comments!

Crest

"Mira has been travelling quite regularly to three worlds. Two are familiar to me though I have not visited them for some time, whilst the third is said to be the home of deviance and has been forbidden for more years than I could remember."

Ronon thought, coming from Lokas, that was saying a lot. The man was certainly old enough to remember a plethora of information from many different times and places. He turned his attention to Doctor Weir when she spoke.

"The home of deviance? Is there anything more said about that world?"

"Nothing that is reliable or helpful. Simply, it is said to be a place where purity is tainted, truths are lies and the hidden is unveiled. I believe the basis of these tales might lie in reality but now the idea of a world which deviance has made its home is used for the purpose of teaching, reflecting."

Truths are lies, hidden is unveiled. "Can we go there? Do you know the address?" Ronon would gladly rise and pummel the gate tech who could not say why the address had not been stored in the database. All incoming wormhole's addresses were stored, all of them except this one. It was as if the Ancestors themselves were working against them, against Sheppard and McKay. At least Lokas brought them hope.

Lokas turned to Ronon, surprised. "Yes. I have knowledge of the worlds Mira visits as per our agreement. She has remained on Atle, continuing her life as Lady Celebrant, but she is under my constant surveillance."

That was a lie. "She goes off-world alone!"

"Yes, but we know where and when."

"But not why?" Ronon thought the why was the most important factor. It explained everything, was the basis of all and could bring forgiveness for atrocious actions. Why was at the heart of man, its nature, its motivation. The truly dangerous ones had no answers to give, they did not know why, they simply knew the when and where.

"She has earned some liberties from her willingness to help me understand Oblee's reasons, what she had become."

"Her liberties have allowed her to take Colonel Sheppard and Doctor McKay once more." Teyla was not impressed. A threat to them had been allowed to roam free and had taken great advantage of that freedom. Who knew what might've been happening to John and Rodney at this very moment. She knew leaving that world had been the best decision, as proved by Lokas' presence and their eventual ability to recover their men, but she felt an oppressing guilt nonetheless. Their men. Ronon and herself had left them behind, for the greater good perhaps, but behind nonetheless.

"A situation which I will remedy promptly." Lokas stood. "I have said all I know and will need to speak with Mira. If what you have told me is indeed her responsibility, I will see that she be made to correct her mistake."

Excuses, excuses, the man was full of them! He saw wrong but always forgave, swept it away with a vague excuse and a brush of the hand and Ronon would not allow it! "It was not a mistake! She brought us there! She gave us to that world!"

"She allowed you to leave, did she not?"

"Because I was of no use to them!"

Teyla's hand came to rest on Ronon's forearm. "We are not here to discuss the validity of Mira's action, Ronon."

Elizabeth judged it an opportune time for her to resume her place in the conversation. "Thank you Teyla. Lokas, we would appreciate if Mira could arrange for us to meet the people holding Colonel Sheppard and Doctor McKay. Your help in this matter is greatly appreciated." She stood and shook his hand before leading him to the gateroom.

"You should not be so prompt to judge him!" Teyla stood and gathered the tea set on its tray, mindful of easing the responsibilities of whoever would come to fetch the remains of their meeting.

"He lies! He excuses her actions! We are missing half of our team because he wasn't able to restrain her!" He watched her move across the room to the door. She paused and he moved to her side.

They exited the briefing room and made their way through Atlantis, uncaring of the area they would find themselves in, of their destination. Teyla could understand Ronon's feeling, share them even, but she knew that to each world its own rules, as did he. "We cannot judge the way others choose to run their worlds. You know as well as I that there are many different beliefs and as many reasons for them. We must respect that. Lokas has been nothing but helpful ever since we first encountered him!"

"Yeah, maybe he has reasons for that." Reasons. Why? Why made man, or perhaps man made why? The thirst for knowledge. Images of McKay's professional life flashed through his head and he wanted to revel in them as much as he wanted to forget. The thrill of discovery, the frustration of denial, the joy of right, the despair of wrong. Why made the man a scientist. He had never understood how much knowledge meant to him, how he found solace in simply knowing what others did not, it made him feel special, how he thought it was his only redeeming quality. Ronon shook his head, attempting to clear it

"He returned John to us, even though we killed his sister!"

It was Sheppard's memories that now assaulted him. His loneliness and despair crafted by Oblee's hands. She had deserved to die, he believed it more now than he had then. Seeing what she had put John through, how she had hurt him made him proud of his baser instinct, the one that had pushed him to wrap his hands around her neck and snap it like a twig. His memories were much more satisfying than Sheppard's "I killed his sister. Don't involve yourself in it Teyla! I did it! It's my blood." She would not claim this! She had enough of her own and he would not allow her more.

"See it as you will, but do not disrespect him or make your dislike evident! He will help us if he can, as he has done before! We owe him so much! Have you forgotten already?" She saw it all in her mind's eye. John's death, its effect on them. Its effect on Rodney and…on her. They had managed to mend a great portion of the chasm that had grown between the four of them, but she still felt as if some animosity resided between her and Rodney. Looking over at her walking companion, she felt the tightness in her recede slightly. The two of them had spoken lengthily upon their return from Atle and had grown closer. She was fortunate to have found such an understanding man behind the gruff, stony façade.

"I remember, we all remember, you know that."

"I do, I was simply reminding you, bringing it closer to mind."

"It's close enough…I saw it."

"You saw what?"

"Sheppard. With those people, in the Sancta…I saw what he saw, I saw what she did to him and what he…went through."

She fell silent, wondering what it would feel like to know so much. She concluded it would be too much, a burden to bear. "I wish you hadn't."

The guilt he had been carrying, the bitter taste of his own betrayal rose in his mouth. "I couldn't help it! It was stronger than me…enticing…" His voice lowered on the last word as if he feared the ridicule it carried.

"I do not blame you. I meant to say that it must be quite difficult for you to forget what you have seen. I am certain…" She breathed in deeply. "…my blood is not the only one you must call your own."

"No…" It was not just blood. In fact, it was not the red, nor the black that had shaken him, that followed him; it was the blue. He didn't see anger or death as much as he saw heartache and grief.

They walked around the city, walking out on balconies, sitting on railings or benches. They walked for hours, they talked for much less. He would not tell his secrets, nor did she want to hear them. It was only when Doctor Weir contacted them that they returned to the world beyond their heartache.

They had information, they had people and they had a go for a rescue mission.