Title: Viva La
Cows
Genre: Humor/Parody
Authors: Rina Of The Falling Stars and
the um… other one…um… Completely Innocent Tora-Chan…
Rated:
K, Kyo has a bad language!
Warnings: It's gimped.
OOCness.
Rina: ((Grins)) I like this movie (We were watching The Day After Tomorrow or something like that…)
Tora: Moo?
Rina: ((sigh)) Yes. Moo. ((Stops burning math textbook))
Disclaimer: We do not own Fruits Basket, Haru, the plot, or our sanity. We also do not own Allison the Cow.
Specail thanks to: Allison, because of her crazy ideas for taking over the world. ((shifty eyes)) The chair is going to eat my bottom.
Is
when you know Rina is saying something, still in narration
Is
when Tora butts her ugly head in(Just kidding. DON'T HURT
MEH!)
Normal narration (I think that's spelled
wrong…)
((A/N or some weird goop or something like that))
"Blah
Blah Fish" Their talking,
duh.
Kyo woke up early one morning, well he always wakes up early. But today he heard a MOOO!
Yes. You heard us right. A moo. Like in cow. A cow moos. Got it? Good.
He walked into the living room and there was a PILLOW!
No…. Way…!
BUT! The pillow was no ordinary pillow. It has a note attached to it!
" Dear Kyo;
I have decided to join the cows. Tell my mom, Aktio, etc. etc.
Sincerely,
Haru
P.S: ((Insert gob of spit.))
"What the ((loud crashing noises)) was he thinking?" Kyo snapped angrily.
Yuki came downstairs.
"Thanks for waking me up, Baka Neko." Yuki said venomously.
Kyo leapt into Yuki's arms.
"OH YUKI! WHAT SHALL WE DO?"
… Pause…
"Um… Are you one cat nip?" Yuki asked.
Awkward silence
"Oh sorry…"Kyo let go of Yuki and patted his shoulder. Then went to his room to scream into a pillow.
Yuki followed him.
"Kyo?" Yuki asked, " BAKA NEKO!"
"Wha?" Kyo asked stupidly.
"What was wrong downstairs?"
"Oh…. HARU HAS RUN OF TO JOIN THE COWS!"
"Oh… Is that all?"
Awkward silence.
"He told me last month."
Awkwarder silence.
" Then-" A loud crash was heard outside.
"What was that!" The looked out the window to see Haru, a heard of cows, and Haru naked.
Tohru walked into the room and looked in the direction they were staring.
"KYAAAA etc. etc.!"
"I AM ONE OF THE COWS! I SHALL TAKE OVER THE WORLD!" Haru yelled.
" I AM A CHICKEN! Oh wait sorry. I AM A COW! MY NAME IS ALLISON AND I MEAN YOU NO HARM!"
Haru mooed.
"Haru! What the hell! Get some clothes on, man! Tohru will bleed to death!" Kyo shouted out the window.
"Oh ya… Hang on!" Haru pulled out a backpack and put on a yellow sundress (Why yellow? No one knows…)
" Not what I meant but OK…"
"Like I was saying…. THE COWS WANT JUSTICE!"
"YA! And we want more chicken feed! Oh and freedom!
Haru looked at her.
"Your not a chicken!"
"QUACK-A-DODDLE-DOO!"
"For the love of… OK. Lets get to the point. KYO, I AM YOUR FATHER!"
"What the hell!" Yuki yelled.
Kyo, on the other hand, sniffed and hugged Haru. "DADDY!"
If that were possible. Which it wasn't. Seeing how Kyo was in his room and such…
BUT! It did happen! Because… HE JUMPED FROM THE WINDOW!
… Right…
"Kyo, I want you to join me.."
"No way, Jack."
"It's pronounced Daddy."
Back upstairs…
"Is it even possible for him to be his dad?" Torhu asked. Yuki gave her a look
"What do you think?"
…. Pause…
"Absolutely NOT!"
"Good girl!" Yuki said as he patted her head.
Back downstairs.
Kyo was wearing black and white and was mooing.
But he disagreed with Haru…
Oh well!
"FAREWELL!" haru sang as he walked away with his new found son, the heard of cows and Allison, the cow who thinks she is a chicken.
"Wait! First we must brief the humans on our plans. That's what they always do in the movies. We are getting revenge for all the years you have milked us, and kept us as common pets. And we have weapons of mass destruction!" Allison called out.
" And what would those weapons be?" Kyo asked.
" THE MILK-O-MATIC! The automatic milking machine that has struck fear into the hearts of cows for decades. But now! THE TABLES HAVE TURNED MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"OK… then…" Yuki muttered as they walked away."
Rina: Flame us! Flame us!
Tora: WEEEE! MILK!