Author's Note:
I've uploaded this before on a different account but took it down. I decided to revise some chapters because I felt I could say more.
This fanfiction collects canon-compliant short stories that I will update sporadically, focusing on events throughout Peter Parker's life. Short stories will take the perspective of characters close to Peter, if not Peter himself.
This short story is set on the first page of Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1. #91, focusing on what Peter may have been thinking. As a result, there are spoilers for a major character's death that occurred in the issue prior.
Please provide feedback on the characters' characterizations and the canonicity of each story, as I may make mistakes. Thank you, and enjoy.
Death
The price of inaction is death.
So why is Peter standing at a man's grave, holding a sobbing Gwen Stacy in his arms?
"- and so, we return George Stacy to the Earth which is mother of us all. Ashes to ashes - dust to dust - amen."
Captain George Stacy was a good man. An ally to everyone, Peter included. Had Peter held his head high up, he would've seen the people Captain Stacy's death brought together, from friends such as Robbie Robertson to even men such as J. Jonah Jameson, who often worked against Peter's secret identity Spider-Man. Yet here, J. Jonah Jameson stood with his head hanging low, an event Peter would think to laugh at.
Not now, though. Peter couldn't focus on the humility Captain Stacy brought to everyone nearby. Instead, he could only focus on how Captain George Stacy died the way he lived: saving lives.
To think that chunk of rubble crashing down on a man was all it took: the consequences of Spider-Man's fight with Doctor Octopus. Captain Stacy put himself in the way of the rubble to save an innocent boy, an act he could've ignored and walked away from alive.
Peter was proactive, trying to take down Doctor Octopus, yet he still couldn't save Captain Stacy. Wasn't that what responsibility meant? Having the power to act and follow through? This was what Peter took away from the night Uncle Ben died. His failure to act resulted in the loss of human life. Death could not escape Peter.
Human lives are what's at stake when he acts passively.
In a way, Peter thought of Captain Stacy as similar to Uncle Ben. No man could fill his uncle's void; however, Captain Stacy was a best friend to Peter. Much like Peter, he committed his life to responsibility and upheld that belief throughout his life. Uncle Ben would have respected Captain Stacy.
He could see it. Uncle Ben and Captain Stacy gathered around at a dinner table. Uncle Ben throwing his head back to the stories Captain Stacy would tell, before sharing his own.
He could see it in heaven.
Why? Captain Stacy was proactive. His life was filled with risks already. He chose to act because it was the responsible decision at the end of the day. At the end of the day, Captain Stacy saved a life. Inaction would have led to that boy's death, instead.
It didn't help! That didn't absolve the guilt Peter felt.
Yet what more could've Peter done? Perhaps Peter could've done more to save Captain Stacy. But... what? Perhaps Gwen's tears running down Peter's suit would have been avoided then. But... how?
Peter acted that day. Guilt will come and go. Death will not. It felt as if... as if death was the status quo for Peter. Life wasn't the beginning of all things. It was death. Life only existed to be taken away. Every day was a dream that Peter would momentarily lapse out of, escaping the indifferent suffering of his loved ones.
Peter had decided upon it. Life wasn't fair. It was obvious, but... what Peter took away the night Uncle Ben died was that he had to act in order to save lives. But even when he did act, people died. No matter what Peter did, there was a fatalistic outcome for anyone he got close to. There's risk in helping people, and in risk comes suffering.
Peter wondered how Captain Stacy could commit to his responsibilities when he knew that truth. People will die, including allies and loved ones. And yet Captain Stacy could continue to move on with his life, seemingly composed as if this did not disturb him.
Hiiic. Huh? Peter looked down, noticing the sobbing sounds of Gwen as her tears soaked into his coat. Captain Stacy left behind a loving daughter... How? How could he sacrifice his life knowing that?
"Be good to her, son! Be good to her. She loves you so very much."
Peter closed his eyes for a second, taking in a steady breath.
He realized the two questions he had for the man were connected. The way Captain Stacy moved effortlessly, knowing that lives were on the line if he messed up was the same way he moved effortlessly to sacrifice his life.
Captain Stacy knew that no matter what the risks were, he touched lives. In death, he connected to other lives. It was only through death he had something worth leaving behind. This dream that was life, Captain Stacy knew was limited. If death was the status quo, then that meant any time Captain Stacy spent living was time added. Captain Stacy didn't lose anything. He left behind life for others, such as Gwen and Peter himself.
Peter held Gwen tighter.
He let go of the breath he was holding onto.
He understood it now.