Willowwind: Back again! Sorry it took so long...I was having problems with this. But it's here now...

Legolas: WHY?

Willowwind: Why what? Why am I writing so soon? Because I got so many great reviews, that's why! Or if you meant the usual 'why', which would be 'why did they all have to review'...I assume it's because they liked the story. So there.

Legolas: (muttermuttermutter)

Willowwind: Okay, now that we've dealt with my muse-who-has-NO-sense-of-humour, let's get the reviews up!

Reviews:

Nachzes-Black Rider: I know you updated, thanks for your opinion, though I knew it already, I know ff.n can be stupid, and why what?

East Coast Ryder: WHEE SUGARSUGARSUGAR! My muse is not going to be happy about this! Thankies for the review! (And the sugar, too...)

Waffles4eva: Yes...you spelt my name wrong...and it's still wrong... And your science teacher apparently speaks with bad spelling, because you misspelled 'misspell'. And later in the review, you misspelled 'weird'. And 'author'. (sticks out tongue) I know I'm evil.

As for that marshmallow line...I think I got it from somewhere else...but whatever. Yeah, Bakura-bunny came in through the window. He probably wanted to scare Bakura-the-first. But who am I to try and analyze a plot-bunny's mind?

Thanks for your opinion...and your guesses were both WRONG. Sorry! Try again!

Antibaseball: ...Thanks...

Sami Ryou's Hikari: Ryou has a hikari? I thought he was a hikari... But maybe that's just me. Don't worry, you're not the only pathetic one. I've been on here every day that is humanly possible since October 12. And you're wrong with the guesses, too. Muaha. I feel so evil. And don't worry, the RyouWhoever won't be huge. I just need to start mentioning a name instead of 'Ryou's girlfriend'. It gets annoying.

Computerfreak101: Yeah, Tea is kind of evil. All that over-friendshippy-ness. Blech. And for the contest...sorry! Try again! Mweheeheehee! I'm sooo evil! …But you did come close when you said an OC…this OC HAS been introduced, though, so I need a name. …I just gave it away, didn't I?

Marick'sDarkSlave: Tee hee hee! Nope, nope, nope, nope, NOPE! Try again! …You spelled 'Marik' wrong, by the way….

Ichigou-otaku: O-kay…I'll make an 'other' category….

Hazel-Beka: That's okay. You reviewed now! Trying to update soon…but I'm so tired…need pop….

Hui Xie: Congradulations! You have won the award for my most disturbing reviewer! Thanks for your reviews, but please keep your perversion to yourself. And no, it's not Malik.

KivaEmber: I know you didn't review chapter five, so I technically shouldn't be doing this, but thanks for the review! And I believe you meant 'existed'. No 'c'.

Anon: Thanks for the review. …I don't exactly watch that show…so I don't really know what you're talking about. Sorry.

Mana-the-Authoress: Don't worry about it. It's a good pairing, and there's nothing wrong with being impulsive. And no, it's not a duel monsters card. I don't know enough about them for it to be one. But at least you guessed OUTSIDE the box! You didn't guess a PERSON! Oh...I just gave it away, I think. Whoops.

Anyways, that concludes the reviews for now. Cookies to reviewers again. Bakura refused to steal some chocolate for you. So, shall we start?

Legolas: NO.

Willowwind: Too bad. Here we go!

The Secret Journal of Bakura the Great
Chapter Six

Today, I made a MARVELLOUS observation about those weird electrical thingees that my hikari uses. Micriwaves-mikrewaves…something like that. I found out…if you put metal in them and turn them on…THE METAL SPARKS! It's ever so much fun…or, at least, it WAS…until Ryou found out about it. Now I'm locked in his room, and I'm not allowed out until I promise to be good and stay away from the microwave. Ah well, maybe he'll go out later. In the meantime, I'm going to look around Ryou's bathroom to see if he hid the black dye in there.

OoOoOoO

I snapped the little book shut and looked around. The only life form in the room besides me was Bakura the bunny, who was sound asleep in his patched-up cage. I stood as quietly as possible, not wanting to wake him. No, I'm NOT getting nice. I just didn't want those freakishly pink eyes of his following me around.

I silently made my way to the bathroom. The door creaked a little as I opened it. I'd have to remind hikari to oil the hinges later. I slipped inside and turned on the light. There were lots of little cabinets in there...and the dye could be anywhere. Oh well, I better get looking.

The first drawer held nothing but toilet paper. Hmm...toilet paper...that could come in handy sometime when I wanted to make Ryou mad and then blame it on the bunny... But that's not what I was looking for. The next few drawers were completely bare. 'Why have so many drawers if you don't put anything in them?' I wondered. Maybe I should ask Ryou...on second thought, no. He'd know I'd been looking for the dye, then.

I opened a cabinet above the sink, which contained soap and shampoo. Unfortunately, Ryou chose this time to walk in.

"Bakura? What are you doing?" I turned to see my hikari, one hand at his side, the other...holding a garlic press. An oversized, METAL garlic press. I gulped.

"N-nothing. I...just wanted...to...wash my face?"

Ryou glared at me. I could tell he didn't believe a word of it. "Get out here now." I scurried out of the bathroom. That cursed bunny was awake now, and watching the whole episode attentively.

"You wouldn't have been looking for that dye you got a few days ago, would you?" His voice was deceptively calm.

"N-no..."

"Good." I could tell he still didn't believe me, but he decided to let it go. "So, are you ready to promise yet?"

"Y-yes. I won't go near the micr-mir..."

"Microwave."

"Yeah. I won't go near the mircowave."

"Microwave. But that's good enough. I'm going to do some shopping." He saw my elated expression and frowned. "But don't even THINK of breaking your promise. Bakura-bunny will be watching you. Won't you?" He turned and smiled at the bunny. For a moment, I almost thought I saw that infernal rodent nod. Whatever. It was probably just me. Ryou let Bakura out of his cage, then left, giving me a warning glance as he did so. I stood still, letting an evil grin slowly spread across my face, and planning what I was going to do with all my spare time. Well...I should find the dye first...

Bakura-bunny wandered around in circles on the floor, and I must admit, he looked very cute for a stupid little rodent. Then his nose started twitching, and he ran into the bathroom. I watched him, confused. Then he came out again, holding a familiar package in his mouth.

My dye?

He made his way over to me, and laid the small, plastic-covered parcel down at my feet. I stooped over to pick it up, giving the bunny a quick stroke between the ears as I did so. No, I am NOT getting soft for the stupid thing. I was just...expressing gratitude. Yes, that's it. Gratitude.

I read the directions for dying hair on the back. Mix with one gallon of boiling water until crystals dissolve. Stick head in, wait 30 seconds, and hope you don't drown and/or severely burn yourself. Do NOT rinse hair until dye is completely dry. Yeesh, who wrote this thing? Well, I didn't have to worry about the 'stick head in' thing. I'm just dying my bat wings. Well, I'd better go get the water ready...

OoOoOoO

I've learned several things today. Normally, I make it a policy to never learn more than one thing a day, but sometimes I just can't help it. I'm too clever for my own good. Anyways, I learned that plastic does weird things in the microwave, first. I tried filling an ice cream container full of water and sticking it in the microwave until it boiled. Unfortunately, the plastic melted after about ten minutes, and spilled the water everywhere. I tried the oven next. Nope, the plastic melts there, too. And that's harder to clean out. Finally, I found a big glass bowl and put the water in THAT. It worked. So I put the dye crystals in the water and mixed them until they dissolved, just like the package said. Then I stuck my bat wings in and waited 30 seconds.

Then another thought occurred to me, while I was waiting. I couldn't dry my hair when it was done, so It'd have to drip-dry. But I couldn't think of anywhere I could safely drip into without getting dye all over the place. Then, it struck me. I could drip back into the bowl!

So, I stood there for fifteen minutes, watching the dye go plopping back into the bowl from my hair. Then that STUPID, ROTTEN, NO-GOOD, CUTE, ANNOYING BUNNY came along. Wait a moment. I DID NOT MEAN CUTE! Augh! Ryou is getting to me. Anyways, along comes Bakura-the-bunny, and he decides that he'd like to be black, for some odd reason. So he hops up onto the counter, and then jumps right into my dye! I tried to reach in to get him out, but the water was so HOT. So I found my hikari's soup ladle and was going to fish him out, but then he jumps out and runs off! RIGHT OVER RYOU'S WHITE CARPET! So I chased him around the house, forgetting that my hair was still wet and likely to be dripping. After about half an hour later, I finally caught him. BUT HIS FUR WAS DRY! I tried to wash him off, but the stupid stuff just WON'T COME OUT! So now we have a black, pink-eyed bunny. He looks very evil. And then I looked in the mirror, and found that I'm REALLY not having a good day.

I was dripping still when I started chasing Bakura. And now, guess what?

I.

Look.

Like.

A.

Retarded.

DALMATIAN!

My hair has black speckles all over it!

So, I tried to find the bleach, to clean up this whole mess, and you know what?

MY HIKARI HID IT AGAIN!

I can't find it. I cleaned up the tiles and the counter in the kitchen. Ryou's going to wonder why his mop is black... But nothing would work on the carpet. Or the walls. Or Ryou's literature homework. Or my hair. Or the bunny.

I am SO dead.

Wait a moment, I AM! That was a completely pointless statement. Uh oh. Ryou's home. I've got to get away! He has the garlic press with him! He's hollering something now. I can't hear. I don't even think it's actual words. Maybe if I just sit here and pretend I don't exist he won't notice me, and then I can get away when he's not looking. I could move somewhere far, far away and start my plans for world domination there and then

(HUGE scribble)

Maybe I should get away now...

OoOoOoO

"So, how many people bought my dye today?" an evil, low voice drawled.

"Fifty-six."

"Hmm...so few? I suppose people are catching on. How many of them died?"

"Only forty-three."

A sigh. "It seems I need a new plan for world domination. But what?" Purple eyes stared at a solid gold rod for inspiration. Then, the violet eyes lit up in a wicked grin. "I think I have an idea..."

OoOoOoO

Willowwind: There you have it. Chapter six. Would have been up sooner if a certain SOMEONE reviewed. She knows who she is.

Legolas: WHY DID YOU HAVE TO REVIEW?

Willowwind: (sigh) That's my muse. So pessimistic all the time. Just think, Legolas-chan…we have 47 reviews now!

Legolas: Woot.

Willowwind: I knew you'd agree! So…if anyone here isn't familiar with the kitchen and doesn't know what a garlic press is, it's a little thing that works kind of like a nutcracker, except you use it to press garlic into little bits. Just thought I'd clarify that. Now, here's the contests, as they stand….

1. Serenity: 3 votes!
Tea: NO VOTES! Sorry, but she's OUT OF THE RUNNING! No more voting for her.
OC: Two votes!
Other: 1 vote…to Mihou Nosaka. ...Full points for originality!

2. TEEHEEHEE! NOBODY'S GONNA GET IT! (ahem) So…any OTHER guesses? Maybe I should give a hint…just to be nice. Um…so far, we've determined it's NOT:

Marik/Malik
Seto
Noa
Joey
Tea
Weevil
Yami
A duel monsters card

Need a hint? As I said to ComputerFreak101, it IS an OC, but they've been introduced, so you need to give me a name. And, as I said to Mana-the-Authoress, it's not a person.That's all but giving it away, but…seeing as how you're going to find out next chapter, I figure I'd better make it easy. Basically, I think that the first person to review will be the one to win. More incentive to review, people!
Just a note on this…I will probably be adding more people to the partnership I'm about to start…but not for a while. I'm open to suggestions…but don't say Marik or his yami. I have…PLANS…for them. I'm probably going to make Yami on Bakura's team…later. A LOT later. Others are welcome on the team, though!

Well, that's it for now! Don't forget to review before you leave…or I won't take responsibility for what Bakura-bunny or Ryou may do to you…. Blackmail? No, of course not. I NEVER blackmail….