Chapter Two: Here comes the Bride, all dressed in…..green?

Nagini sat in her spacious rooms, glowering in her vanity mirror. Snape had some nerve, asking for her like that, as if she was an object that could simply be handed over, like a sneakoscope or some piece of bric-a-brac. She'd show him! The Dark Lord wants me to marry Snape, and I will do it, but Snape will keep his hands to himself unless he wants them bitten off, the nasty, slimy git. He really was slimy, as he didn't wash nearly often enough. Even with the relatively dull senses she had in her human shape, she could smell him a couple yards off. Nagini grimaced. I hope I will not have to resort to eating him. He is sure to taste absolutely foul and give me terrible indigestion. I suppose I could always wash him first if I needed to.

She admired her reflection as she prepared for the ceremony. Being angry suited her, she decided. There had never been a more beautiful bride, and there never would be. Even those fluffy headed veela were no competition. She had scorned white as a wedding dress color and instead chosen to wear a brilliant green silk that matched her eyes exactly. She was the Dark Lord's surrogate mother after all, and more than halfway into her first century, not twenty and marrying someone she cared more than a hill of Bertie Bott's about. She grinned suddenly, exposing her fangs. She'd only have to put up with Snape for a hundred years or so, then she could erect an outhouse on his grave if she liked. She sniggered at the thought. An outhouse for Muggles.

"You're looking more cheerful," the Dark Lord commented, entering her room without knocking, something that always irritated her. He knew it, too. She stood up, ready, literally, to face the music.

"It has occurred to me that as I am nearly immortal, marrying Snape is a minor inconvenience."

"That's right my dear" her master said comfortingly. His face grew serious as he took her arm. "An inconvenience I very much need you to endure. I am beginning to doubt his loyalty, and I need you to keep an eye on him."

"Just what level of treachery do you suspect?" Nagini asked in surprise, as they headed for the Dark Lord's feasting hall, where Snape and a corrupt wizarding official were waiting.

She didn't bother to whisper. There were no Parselmouths to overhear them. "Ambition" her master said darkly. "He may be plotting to take my place, if Potter should by some freak twist of fate defeat me."

"Over my dead body." Nagini said seriously. Her master smiled. "I know," he said. Nagini was beaming as her master led her up the aisle to where Snape and the judge stood.

Severus found the look on Nagini's face encouraging. He shouldn't have.

Snape looked entirely too smug for Nagini's taste. Without altering her expression in the slightest, she put her foot on the toe of Snape's boot and bore down hard.

To her disappointment, he made no sign of any discomfort. She continued to grind down on his foot throughout the ceremony. She doubted Snape was a serious threat, but she thought it wise to begin as she meant to continue. I can treat him however I want she gloated to herself All I have to do is refrain from eating him without Master getting to interrogate him first. Her opinion of Snape improved somewhat as he continued to bear the pain without a sound, or so much as a wince.

Severus was bewildered. Is torture some kind of sadistic marriage ritual?

Nagini probed Severus' mind while they sat together at dinner. His thoughts seemed to be centered on the pain in his foot, but Nagini knew it was a ruse. Snape had to be one of the greatest Occulumens wizardkind had ever seen--he'd fooled Dumbledore after all. Determined to learn what he was really thinking, she dug deeper. Unlike the legilimency used by wizards, her method was specific and informative.

Severus Snape carefully kept his thoughts safe and mundane. Constant vigilance was his motto. Mad--eye Moody wasn't the only one who was paranoid. He'd gotten this far, survived this long. He could do anything he liked now, have anything he wanted. He already had Nagini.

Nagini smirked. Snape was congratulating himself, the fool. All men were fools where her kind was concerned. They just couldn't seem to resist a beautiful creature that was half snake. Her power over men was more subtle than a veela's charm, but it was closer to absolute. A veela could make men do rather stupid things, but she could get a man to do what she wanted without damaging his intelligence.

She continued with what she thought of as picking his brain. Most of what she found was boring, but some of it was quite interesting. "What's this? He's comparing me to Harry Potter's Mudblood mother!" Nagini was outraged. "At this very moment he's debating whether he likes my hair or hers better!" She fumed mentally. Ugly fire-red hair, or an elegant, long, black, shiny braid wrapped around the head then draped across a shoulder to nearly sweep the floor. "It should be no contest."

Severus was startled when he realized what Nagini was saying under her breath before each bite of food. "Lucius Malfoy" chew chew chew. "Goyle" chew chew chew "Avery" chew chew chew "The Fat Toad also known as Dolores Umbridge" chew chew chew chew chew.

Nagini reached a decision of her own as she ate. If that slimy git decides he likes red better he'll be sleeping on the floor, not just on the other side of the bed. "I wonder howgood a legilimens she is," Snape suddenly thought. Nagini choked on her extra rare steak. She had definitely underestimated him. Snape smirked as he magically cleared her throat.

"That's right," Severus whispered, too low for any but Nagini's keen, pointed ears to hear "You did. I've underestimated you as well, I admit. I knew you were a legilimens, but I didn't think you were that good." He paused and continued in a normal volume. "You know, most people don't assign the name of someone they don't like to every bite of food. It's a little immature."

"Actually" Nagini said honestly, "it's a time honored tradition. It reminds us of our goals in life". She smiled broadly, careful to display all four of her fangs.

Severus raised an eyebrow. "Really," he said calmly. "Any other cultural differences I ought to know about?" It was apparently Nagini's turn to smirk again.

"In our dialect of Parseltongue, there is only one word for both slave and husband," she said, her eyes gleaming strangely.

"I heard you were matriarchal," Snape replied blandly.

Nagini snorted. "Matriarchal? We make the Amazons look like meek, docile housewives."

"Oh?" Snape said skeptically.

"If you make me mad, I'll eat you," she said frankly. Of course I'll have to wash you first. Her statement seemed to give Snape pause, as it ought to have, being quite perfectly true.

"Does the Naga word for human bear any resemblance for the word for food?" he asked dryly.

"Yes. The word for human is a compound word that means 'food that thinks it's smart.' Wizards are called 'food that thinks it's smart enough to use magic.' Quite clever of you to guess at that, really."

Snape raised a thoughtful eyebrow, and remained silent, his desire for conversation apparently satisfied. Or at least squelched. Nagini thought smugly.

Chapter 3. Marital Bliss. Or Not.