Chapter five already! Alrightie, content for language, talk of drugs and abuse.

I dont own any of the FB crew, alas.

I love each and everyone of my reviewers and want to shower them with kisses and love, oh and for those who havent, check out 'Hopeful tears for lost years' a fan fic by a reviewer of mine based on my last chapter, its fantastic and if you liked mine you'll like this!

R+R and Chapter six will be up soon!

Bobby was sitting on the porch steps of the house, staring out over the neighbourhood. His jaw was clenched so tight that it almost looked painful and Angel fancied he could hear the creak of Bobby's teeth wearing down.

"How's Ma?" Bobby asked, as Angel sat on the step just above Bobby.

"Diane made her some kinda herbal tea thing, chilled her out. I think there might have been weed in it, Diane's odd like that" Angel told him.

"Find out if there really is weed in it. And get me some" Bobby said blankly "This is fucked up" he sounded oddly resigned and it scared Angel.

"Look this bitch can't be that good of a person, she'll screw up and we'll get him back" Angel tried to comfort both Bobby and himself.

"To be honest that's part of what m worried about…what if she's a lousy parent and it screws him up again?" Bobby turned his head slightly, giving Angel his profile as he spoke to him "It took so long to get him to see us as people he could trust…sending him away with people he's terrified of is bad enough but…she doesn't know him like we do, she wont know how to deal with it if he has a nightmare, or if he sleep walks, or if…" Bobby trailed off.

"If he needs help with his homework, she wont be able to help him out like Jerry does" Angel continued "She can't teach him how to fight for himself like we can, or teach him his manners like Ma would, or any of the things we do for him" he nodded slowly in agreement "I know man, it sucks"

"I just wanna fucking…hurt something" Bobby growled "Just break shit or hurt some one or…damn it just anything!" he curled his hands into fists.

Angel squeezed Bobby's shoulder just hard enough to hurt "Just chill out man" he said quietly, sympathetically.

The door creaked open and shut and a hand appeared in Angel's peripheral vision, holding a mug. "It's Irish Coffee" Jerry grimaced handing another mug to Bobby as Angel took his "Mrs Rebadow made them, she's in talking to Ma, suggested we three could do with a drink"

Bobby managed a short, cynical laugh "That lady always tries to get people drunk, you ever notice?" he asked. "like that time when I fell out of the tree and gave me a beer" he shook his head.

"Or when we came home early from the park that time cos it started snowing, remember? And none of us had our key and Ma was out, so Mrs Rebadow brought us in to her house" Angel chuckled.

"Oh my god! I remember that and she gave us brandy to warm up! And Jack got wasted!" Jerry laughed out loud.
"Boy cant handle his drink" Bobby said emphatically.

"You remember when, uh, that Halloween when he scared you Bobby? He hid all under your bed and grabbed your ankles, man you screamed like a little bitch" Angel laughed.

Bobby shook his head "That wasn't funny, that was lame it wasn't funny" he tried to play it off but Angel and Jerry high fived as they laughed at him.

"Yeah well how about when you pushed him and he made you almost cry by saying he was gonna tell Ma you beat him up, Jerry!" Bobby shot back, grinning as he turned to glare at his brother.

"Oh I did not almost cry!" Jerry scoffed.

"Oh yes you did" Angel nodded, grinning wide.

"Well he got you to, Angel, telling Sophi you said you wanted to marry her" Jerry reminded him and Bobby, who was sipping his coffee at the time spurted and choked, spitting coffee all over the lawn.

"And she went and bought bridal magazines!" He yelled, laughing uncontrollably "And Ma went nuts at you and Sophi was goin 'Ay Papi, I love yu mi amoooore'" he put on an accent and nasaly voice " 'oh we gonna have such a beautiful service and mi mami said I can wear her dress oh Aaaaaangel'" Bobby actually had to wipe tears of mirth from his eyes as Angel tried to act like he wasn't bothered by the teasing.

"Jackie has an evil little sense of humour sometimes" Jerry said sadly.

"Yeah but he's a genius at using it right" Angel stated "Kids got a mind for pranks like I don't know what" he tapped Jerry's shoulder "Remember thepet storething?"

Bobby burst out laughing againas Jerry, smiling, nodded slowly, seriously.

They all remembered thepet storething.

"That was just cool" Bobby stated.

"look at us. We're talking like he died or something, he didn't die, he just aint around right now" Angel reminded them "We'll be able to see him again, that lady cant be that mean that she wouldn't at least let us, the people who've been his family for three years, visit with him" he shrugged.

"Bu til she decides when we can see him, he's all alone with her" Bobby murmured.

Jack was hugging his knees as he sat on the floor on the far side of the small bed. There was a full length mirror in the room, on a stand, and Jack had moved it, standing it opposite himself and the door so that he would be able to keep his backto the door and hide behind the bed, but would see if any one came in. His eyes where fixed on the mirror, his gaze a defensive, angryversion of what he had heard his brothers call a 'thousand yard stare'.

He was rocking back and forth and he didn't like that he was because when he did it at home Bobby would always mimic him until he stopped. But now, Bobby wasn't here, and Jack was still rocking and he wanted to stop himself but he couldn't because the fear that was rolling around in his stomach and tensing all of his muscles until it was painful and Jack wanted to curl up into the smallest possible ball that he could and just disappear but his stupid body got in the way and so all he could do was sit and rock while the fear built up and up until he thought he would explode and he realised with a start that he was digging his own fingers into his arms so tightly that he was hurting him self but he couldn't stop because he could see the door reflected in the mirror and he kept expecting the door to open and-

Jack gasped suddenly and hurled himself across the room turning so that the door was facing him. He heard the creak at the top of the stairs, something he had taken note of when Amelia had first shown him where his room was hours ago. He had recorded it in his head automatically, just in case. Some one tried the handle. A tentative knock sounded on the door and Jack's eyes flicked to the small lock he had turned as soon as he was alone in the room.

"Jack? I made you some food, okay?" Amelia called through the door "It's a sandwich, and a soda and a candy bar for dessert" she told him "You want to open the door so I can bring it in?" she asked.

Jack stared intently at the door.

"Jack? I know you don't like this but that doesn't mean you cant eat" Amelia called.

Jack glanced around the room again, trying to see if there was anything he could use.

There was a lamp on the bedside table and he considered simply throwing it at the door…but then he might need it later for self defence, so he didn't want to waste it.

"Jack please?" Amelia tried.

Jack huddled himself in again, hugging his knees and thinking of home.

"Well I'll leave this here for you…" there was the sound of a tray being placed on the floor and a pregnant pause as if Amelia planned to say more, then the sounds of footsteps retreating from the door.

Jack thumped his head against the wall in frustration, trying to get his fear under control. He remembered being very small, his father drugging his food so that he wouldn't make a fuss when- He squeezed his eyes closed and remembered the sound of Evelyn-of his mothers voice. She was singing to him, 'hushabye mountain' from the film with the car…she wasn't holding him though, he was sitting with his brothers and they where gently teasing him for needing a lullaby but at the same time their very presence soothed him and they knew it…this had happened when he was eight, he recalled, and he had had a resurgence of night terrors for weeks and on the worst night his family, his real family no matter what the law said, had gathered around him and had as one, made him realise that he didn't need to be afraid, as long as he was in the Mercer house he never needed to be afraid.

He realised he was crying and wiped angrily at his face. "Not in the Mercer house now Jackie boy" he whispered to himself "So be afraid" he whimpered.

He frowned then. "No" he told himself "Fraidy cats never get shit done, they get dead" he hissed. He steeled himself and stood, his legs shaking, and began to look around the room. It was a decent enough room with the bed, the mirror, a cupboard and shelves and a desk, all new looking. The air smelled of the plastic most of the things had come wrapped in and there where Hockey posters on the wall. One was for the Mighty Ducks and Jack, despite his fear, rolled his eyes. He went to the window and stared out at the view. The neighbourhood Amelia lived in was only a step up from Evelyn's, the only real difference being that the lawns where a little neater, and the cars where a little nicer. The houses wheren't bigger, just painted differently. Jack didn't understand why people where calling it a nice neighbourhood. In the dying light of the day it looked like a child's drawing of a street, empty, blank, and unreal.

He checked the windows. They where double glazed which translated as hard to smash and they locked with those sealing locks that had a key and shut out all the noise when you closed them. They had been rigged too, he saw as he tried them, so that they wouldn't open more than a few inches. Jack could see where the small bars had only recently been added to make the windows this way and he guessed all the windows in the house would be the same. He cursed as he pulled at the little bar, hoping it would be shoddy workmanship and would come loose but it was too firmly placed and he realised he would need some kind of tool so made a mental note to find one as soon as possible. He already knew she had all the doors out of the house on one key as she had made a point if telling him as they arrived.

With another sigh, he turned back into the room and walked over to his suitcase. Ma and his brothers had insisted on helping him pack and as he popped the clasps and flipped the lid open, he saw why. On top of his clothes, there was, to start with, an extra large bottle of Jack's favourite bubble bath. Jack smiled sadly and lifted the bottle out, setting it aside. Beside it, there was a large framed photo of Jack with his brothers and Evelyn, all of them red nosed and rosy cheeked after having spent hours in the snow one winter. The next item came directly from Jerry; A copy of Peter Pan, Jack's favourite book. Jack smiled and touched the cover of the book and felt himself grow sad as he remembered Jerry reading it to him and teaching him to him read it himself after a while.

Angel had included a bag of plastic soldiers and a note saying simply 'for protection'. Bobby had left him a knife, a simple little swiss army knife that wouldn't cut butter but it would be comforting weight in his pockets. Jack sat down heavily on the bed, and picked up the photo. He could feel himself starting to tear up again as he stared at the picture. "Ma" he whispered tearfully, touching his hand to the picture.

He looked around the room, swiping at his eyes as the tears began to fall.

He crept over to the door and laid down on the floor, listening through the gap under the door.

He could here what could have been a radio or television, and the thrum of an oven or kitchen fan. Amelia, if she was the only other person in the house and as far as Jack knew she was, was probably in the kitchen. She had given Jack a quick tour of the house when they had first arrived and he knew that the kitchen was near the front of the house, closer to the stairs. He could here the clatter of dishes and plates being moved around as she presumably cooked something. Jack thought for a second, then reached up and unlocked the door to his bed room. No one rushed at him as the lock clicked so he grabbed the handle and twisted it, pulling the door open just a touch. Still no ogres or boogey men came at him so he opened the door enough that he could lean out into the upstairs hall way. He saw that the room Amelia probably owned was directly across from his, the bathroom in between them both. Jack glanced down at the tray of food, nudging it aside with his toe. He wasn't going to eat anything she gave him. He stepped into the hall, hugging the walls to avoid any loose or creaking boards. As he got to the bathroom he peeked in and cursed as he saw that there was no bath, only a shower. "Bitch" he muttered.

He glanced toward her bed room but decided it was too much of a risk with her in the house and turned back to ward the room he was being kept in. He wrinkled his nose and looked around the small hallway. There was another room a little further down from Amelia's so, casting another look down at the stairs, Jack crept along the wall toward the room. He got close enough that he could see into the room, which was empty of everything except four walls and a ceiling.

He realised that this room would be right over the kitchen so decided to save checking its windows for another day. With another curse, he snuck back to what he hated to call 'his' room and closed the door again. He walked back to the bed and gathered his gifts from his family. He tore open the bag of soldiers first, counting the soldiers and taking half in his hand. He lined up the soldiers up in front of the door, on their backs so that the sharp edges would face up and hurt the feet of anyone who came through the door.

He looked down at the small throw rug on the floor between the bed and the door. With a sigh of regret, he wrapped his t-shirt around his fist and smashed the glass in the frame of the picture. Pulling back the rug he scattered the glass beneath it, stepping in it to hear a satisfying crunch that would be another deterrent/warning if anyone came into his room.

The knife he tied to a cord around his wrist so that when he walked it dangled down essentially sitting in the curve of his palm. The bubble bath, he kept with him.

It was growing dark out side but Jack didn't turn on the light. Instead, he hugged the bottle of bubble bath to him and tool up his seat under the window, setting up the remaining toy soldier in a linein front of him,staring at the door with watchful eyes.

It had been two weeks since Jack had been taken away by his aunt. Bobby, Angel and Jerry where bouncing on the balls of their feet as Evelyn dug through her purse and retrieved her keys.

"Ma, seriously" Jerry said pointedly "Like, now!" he told her.

"Alright alright!" Evelyn walked to the bottom of the stairs "Diane we're leaving, there's sandwiches in the fridge and we'll bring back take out" she yelled.

"Alright Evie, give Jackie our love, tell him I want him to send me some sketches" Diane appeared at the top of the stairs and yelled down.

"I will, see you later guys" Evelyn called.

The boys where already standing beside the car as Evelyn ran out to them unlocked the doors. They piled in, quietly, instead of bickering over the seating arrangements like they normally did. Evelyn pulled the car into the street and began to drive, flicking the radio on to fill the silence.

They drove for at least half an hour before they pulled in to the parking lot of a diner and Evelyn barely had time to park before the boys flew from the car and ran to the door of the diner. Evelyn locked the car and ran after them as they entered.

The four of them hesitated at the door and until some one yelled '"MA!" in a voice heavy with emotion and relief.

Evelyn pushed through the boys and saw Jack at a booth at the other end of the counter. He pushed out past Amelia and ran the full length of the diner.

"Jack!" Evelyn sobbed as she dropped into a crouch and scooped Jack up into a hug, the sound of the diner and its patrons fading away, everything melting away until all she was aware of was Jack in her arms and her boys at her back.

"Oh Jackie" She whispered, feeling his arms squeezing around her "Oh my baby I missed you" she told him.

Jack said nothing but she could feel him crying in her arms as she squeezed him as hard as she dared. He felt fragile to her, scrawny, and she realised with a start that she could feel the lumps of his spine through his jacket.

She held him in her arms but drew back from him so that she could see his face. He was pale, his cheeks hollow, his eyes sunken, shadowed and with bags beneath them. "Jackie" she barely had time to breath before Bobby reached around her and pulled Jack into a bear hug, the smaller boy almost disappearing in the folds of Bobby's thick winter coat.

Jerry and Angel crowded around them and joined the hug, the four of them blocking up the aisle of the diner and not giving a shit.

Evelyn turned back to see Amelia, an uncomfortable look on her face, walking toward them.

"He is starving" Evelyn hissed raggedly.

"He wont eat the food I give him, he eats the lunch he gets at school and that's it all day its not my fault" Amelia spat back angrily.

Evelyn scoffed and turned back to her sons. Bobby had reluctantly set Jack down on the ground and was crouching in front of him, examining him.

Jerry was looking at Jack's hand "Damn man, you been biting your nails?" he asked.

"Look at your face Jackie, you been eatin?" Bobby frowned, holding Jacks face in one hand.

"What you been doing to him!" Angel snapped at Amelia.

She sighed "Like I told your mother, he wont eat the food I give him" she shot back.

"She might put stuff in it, like my dad did" Jack whispered to his brothers by way of explanation.

"Why would I do that Jack!" she asked, exasperated.

Ignoring her, he leaned closer to the boys "She rigged the windows so I cant get out" he told them.

"Shall we sit down?" Evelyn said diplomatically.

Amelia rolled her eyes as she nodded and headed back to the booth she had come from. The Mercers followed her and sat in the booth, the four boys all trying to fit into the same side as Evelyn.

Reluctantly, Angel and Bobby sat beside Amelia as the waitress came over to take their drinks orders.

When she was gone, Evelyn turned in her seat to look at Jack. "Did you get taller?" she asked him.

"I don't know" he answered quietly.

"How's it been kid?" Bobby asked.

Jack shot a glare at Amelia "She doesn't have a bath" he told them "so no bubbles"

"The house came like that when I moved in" Amelia told them.

"Have you had any sleep?" Angel frowned as he leaned forward.

"How can I sleep knowing what she might do!" Jack snapped irritably.

"Jack, I'm not going to do anything to you, I would never hurt you like that" Amelia sighed.

Evelyn, although she hated it, could see that Amelia was stressed and felt the faintest twinge of guilt for her. "Jack I'm sure it would be okay for you to sleep. And I don't like that you're not eating and that's not anybodies choice but your own" she scolded him gently "If you really think Amelia would do something to your food, why don't you just watch her make it, that way you can see if she's making you a turkey sandwich or a rat poison sandwich" she suggested.

Amelia gave her a look of gratitude as Jack grudgingly nodded.

The waitress returned with their drinks and they ordered their food, Jack ordering the largest meal of them all, unsurprisingly.

They made idle, forced chatter until the food came and it wasn't until they saw Jack begin to wolf down his meal that the other boys started on theirs "hey, close your mouths and breath between bites" Evelyn admonished them all.

"So Jackie boy what's you're new school like?" Bobby asked.

"S'good, I joined the hockey team" Jack told them "and this kid hassled me the first few days there" he took a sip of his milkshake.

"What'd you do?" Angel frowned.

"I pounded him into the ground" Jack shrugged and grinned at them.

"Atta boy Jackie" Jerry laughed "sew the Mercer reputation far and wide" he nodded.

"His last name is not Mercer" Amelia told them.

The four boys gave her identical 'whatever' looks and carried on with their conversation as if she hadn't spoken.

"What's the hockey team like?" Angel asked.

"It sucks. Even for ten year olds it sucks. And they're all little fairies who go bitchin to the coach if you slam em too hard" Jack frowned.

"I guess it takes a fairy to know a fairy huh Jackie boy?" Bobby teased.

Jack snickered and threw a fry at Bobby "If I'm a fairy its cos I copy how you are" he shot back.

"Ma did you hear that!" Bobby turned to Evelyn.

"I did. And he has a point" Evelyn joked.

Bobby gasped theatrically and began bickering with his brothers as Jack giggled and showed more life than he had in weeks. Evelyn joined in the mock fight and took Jack's side in the 'rivalry'. As the family, and that's what it was, continued their games, Amelia sat to one side, excluded, ignored, staring at them with angry eyes.

"Four hours!" Ameliaheld upa cigarette and let Vern light it for her with the lighter she had given him for Christmas "They all took their damn time eating their meals, then hemmed and hawed over dessert for almost forty minutes, I swear Vern they went through every option on that menu and discussed the pro's and con's of every single one before they ordered, then when they had ordered they all changed their minds half way through and ordered totally new stuff, and then, the quiet one, Terry or Jerry, well I saw him watching the pie tray, he waited until it was empty, then re-re ordered and asked for a slice of pie and when the waitress told him it would be at least half an hour he told her that was fine and they all decided they could wait half an hour for their own desserts so that he wouldn't be eating his alone and that the waitress could hold all the orders until then. And they took their time eating the desserts too, I've never seen anybody make banana split last so long. And then they all just kept ordering coffee!" She took a long drag on the cigarette, her face tense and angry "And Evelyn, was content to let them get away with it so in the end I just said I had things to do and I took Jack and I left" she sighed.

"And how is the kid?" Vern asked, pouring Amelia a mug of green tea.

"Well he's up in his room right now, naturally of course. Probably plotting to kill me in my bed" she snarked "He wont talk to me, he wont eat the food I make him, he barely even looks at me" she admitted.

"Remind me again why you wanted him?" Vern lit his own cigarette.

"I…when I found out what John had done to him, I couldn't believe my own flesh and blood could do something so awful" she confessed "So I wanted to show this kid that our family wasn't all bad"

"But?" Vern made it a question.

"But now I'm beginning to think it might have been a bad idea…I'm still dreading one of these…attacks of his…and he clearly hates me, and to be honest…some times I just want to…" she made claws with her hands and grimaced "Just smack him or something you know? And I feel awful because he hasn't done a damn thing to deserve it but at the same time I think, I'd feel so much better if I could take my frustrations about him out on him" she pointed to her cigarette "I mean look at this? I haven't had a smoke in almost two years!"

Vern ran a hand through his dark hair "Well since vices are on the menu tonight and you want to unwind…why not have a couple glasses of wine?" he suggested.

Amelia fixed him with a glare "Vern I worked hard to get clean" she stated.

"Look, this kid stresses you out right?" Vern leaned forward slightly "The only way to unwind that stress is to either give him back, or beat the shit out of him. If you do the first, that fucked up family wins. If you do the second, that fucked up family wins and you become one of the things you hate" he had been counting off on his fingers as he spoke, and now he held one up "So then we create option number three…get to a place where he doesn't bother you any more, zone out" he shrugged as if it was the obvious answer.

Amelia stared at nothing as she thought it over "Wine wouldn't do it, my tolerance is too high" she said quietly.

Vern smiled and shook his head "I can compensate for that" he stated, reaching into his jacket pocket.

He retrieved what looked like a diabetics portable injection kit and lay it down on the table. In a slow, deliberate movement, he unzipped the wallet looking kit and pulled out a syringe, and a small baggie filled with white powder. He leant back in his chair as Amelia, her eyes wide, drew ferociously on the cigarette, staring at the baggie.

"No pressure. You don't want it, I'll take it away and never mention it again" He said.

Amelia rubbed unconsciously at her own cotton covered arms. In a tiny voice she whispered "Take it away" and nodding wordlessly, Vern packed the kit away and put it back in his pocket.

He sipped the coffee he had brewed for himself and took a deep breath, seeming to shake off the previous five minutes as he breathed out "So how's work been?" he asked casually.

"Uh…good. Fine" Amelia nodded "This new book I have to proof read is pretty good, sad though" she took another hit from her cigarette "It wouldn't even need to be a lot because I've been off it so long right? I mean its not like I'm going back on it, I just need to mellow out then from tomorrow I can make the real effort, get this damn kid to like me…hell maybe I can ask for a raise and get him that bath tub he wants" she spoke very quickly, "I'd only need one hit tonight and then I'll be fine tomorrow" she smirked.

Vern nodded and retrieved the kit again "You're sure?" he asked even as Amelia peeled off her fitted sweater and held out her arm.

"Yeah, It's just for tonight, why wouldn't I be sure?" she smiled confidently.

Vern pulled off his belt and looped it around her arm to make a vein rise. And Amelia smiled to her self "It'll help, in the long run, cause I'll be able to think more clearly when I mellow out a little, I cant think when I'm wound up like this and that kid winds me up, so I'll just mellow out, that's all I need to do"