Shelby walked back into the lodge and one could see that she had obviously been crying. She wasn't physically hurt or anything. It wasn't like Scott had hit her. But she couldn't get rid of that feeling in her stomach: guilt.
It was an evil emotion. Shelby felt like she was going to be sick but she controlled herself. She looked around the lodge for Jena to take her back to their cabin but Daisy walked up to her before she spotted Jena.
"What happened?" Daisy asked with concern.
Shelby shook her head and another tear rolled down her cheek.
"I told him." Shelby said fighting more tears.
Shelby didn't have to explain. Those three words explained everything.
Daisy pulled Shelby into a hug and stroked her head. Shelby just broke down. She started to cry even more and couldn't stop the tears falling from her eyes. Daisy felt so helpless. There was nothing she could do to help Shelby. This was something that only time would heal. Daisy tried to be mad at Scott for hurting Shelby like this, for not understanding, but she couldn't. As much as Daisy hated to admit it, she saw where Scott was coming from. Shelby kept his daughter from him for over 5 years.
Shelby pulled away from Daisy and looked at her but wouldn't meet her eyes.
"I have to get out of here. I can't stay here. I have to just take Jena and go." Shelby said in a kind of panicked voice.
"No. I'm not going to let you just leave like that, Shelby." Daisy responded.
"I can't stay here; by him."
Daisy grabbed Shelby shoulders and made her look her in the eyes.
"Shelby, you can do this. Okay? You're going to be fine. You're strong. Just give Scott some time to get over the shock of it. I mean, it's hard for someone to find out they have a daughter." Daisy said trying to comfort Shelby.
"I don't want Jena to have to worry about this." Shelby said softly.
"Jena will be fine. She can stay with me and Jason tonight. I'll have Jason grab the mattress from you're cabin and put it in ours. We'll deal with her tonight while you deal with yourself."
"I can't ask you to do that."
"You're not asking me to do anything. I'm offering."
"Thanks. I'm gonna just say good-bye to her now then."
"Okay. Take Jason with you now to grab the mattress then."
Shelby nodded and walked on to the dance floor by Jena and Jason and she pulled them both aside. She looked down to Jena and kind of squatted down to be the same height as her. Jena wiped a couple of tears off of Shelby's cheeks with made Shelby smile.
"What's wrong, mommy?" Jena asked.
"Don't worry about it, sweety. I'll be okay. Hey, what do you think about staying the night with Daisy and Jason tonight?" Shelby asked and tried to sound kind of happy as if nothing was wrong.
Jena knew that something was obviously wrong with her mom. She hugged Shelby which made Shelby nearly cry again but this time tears of joy. Jena pulled away from the hug and smiled to Shelby.
"If it will help you, I'll stay with Auntie Daisy and Jason." Jena said and sounded so much older than she actually was.
"I actually think you'll benefit from this more than I will, sweety." Shelby responded with a fake smile.
Jena looked confused as to what Shelby was talking about but ignored it. She just hugged her mom again.
"I love you, mommy." She said while still hugging her.
Shelby smiled and squeezed Jena tighter and then said, "I love you too, baby."
They both pulled away from the hug and Shelby stood up strait again.
"Why don't you go by Daisy while I take Jason to take your bed into their cabin, okay?" Shelby asked.
Jena nodded and walked over by Daisy, who picked her up in her arms. Shelby looked to Jason and started walking and he followed her.
"So you told him?" Jason asked once they were inside Shelby's cabin.
Shelby turned around and nodded.
"And I'm guessing he didn't take it well." Jason said.
"No at all. It was weird though. We were sitting there on his bed, making out and then he just stopped and asked why I left." Shelby said.
"And that's when you told him about Jena."
"Kind of. I told him it was 'cause I was scared which is true. And then he brought up how he thought I got pregnant right after I left and I told him I didn't. Then he thought I was cheating on him so I told him that Jena was his and like you said, he didn't take it well."
"That's understandable. I'm not saying what he said to you that hurt you so bad was right. But, Shelby, you kept his daughter from him. You even kept that he had a daughter from him for nearly six years. If someone did that to me, I don't care how much I may love the person, I would be pretty pissed off too."
"I know. He has every right to be mad at me. And that's what makes this so damn hard. I know I screwed up and he has no idea how guilty I feel about it. I was just so scared." Shelby said as she started to cry again.
"I get that, Shelby. But you have think of this from his point of view." Jason said sympathetically.
"I know but I can't. All I can think about now is that look in his eyes. He was so mad and so hurt. That look alone almost made me fall and burst into tears."
Jason put his arm around Shelby in a friendly, comforting way.
"I can't imagine how guilty you feel right now. You probably feel like you should just curl up in a ball, hide and never come back out. But you can't do that, Shel. You have too many people who need you to be there for them." Jason said.
"That is exactly what I want to do. I've always been the strong one. I've always been able to deal with my problems and emotions but right now all I feel like doing in dying!" Shelby was struggling to keep her words clear through painful sobs.
Jason moved his arm away from Shelby and forced her to look at his face.
"Be that strong person again, Shel. I know she's still in there deep down, fighting to get to the surface. Just be who you always are; always were. Guilt is an evil and painful emotion but it can only get to someone if they let it. Don't let it. You thought you were doing the right thing at the time. You have nothing to be sorry about. Yes, you should have told Scott but don't let that get to you. We're all entitled to make some mistakes. So cry it out tonight while me and Daisy have Jena but tomorrow, don't let him get to you anymore." Jason said to Shelby as she gazed into those emerald green eyes.
"I'm definitely going to cry tonight. The not letting him get to me come tomorrow is going to be the hard part." Shelby replied with a faint smile.
Jason stood up and grabbed one end of the mattress. He tried to carry it by himself and it wasn't the weight that was making that difficult, it was the size of it. Shelby stood up and grabbed the other end of the mattress and helped Jason carry it to the cabin next door. The put it on the floor and Jason put Jenas pillow and blanket on the mattress too.
Shelby turned to leave but she stopped and looked back to Jason. Her face was still red from when she was crying but she smiled to Jason and said, "Thanks."
The only response Shelby got was a smile and a nod from Jason. Shelby and Jason weren't extremely close but Jason had a talent at seeing and knowing what people need. Jason always knew how to comfort Shelby in a big brother type of way.
Shelby walked back into her cabin and closed the door. She took off her shoes and her clothes and changed she changed into a pair of blue pajama pants with monkeys and bananas all over them with a white tank top that had a big monkey holding on a banana on it. Shelby loved these pajamas.
Shelby walked over to and sat on her bed after brushing out her hair. She grabbed one of the pillows and hugged to herself. She cried, like she knew she would and couldn't stop the tears from coming.
Jason's words had helped Shelby greatly but she still couldn't get rid of that feeling in her stomach. A feeling that made her sick to her stomach. A feeling that made her cry her eyes out. A terrible feeling of guilt. She couldn't get rid of it. Scott was right. Shelby shouldn't have run away and even if she did, she should have at least told him about Jena.
Shelby let the painful sobs leave her mouth and didn't fight them anymore. She closed her eyes and literally cried herself to sleep, still hugging the pillow.