Disclaimer: Because many parts of this story contain events directly from the books of Tolkien, some dialogues and phrases may be similar to the original writing of Tolkien. If you recognize anything as Tolkien's, know that it is his and that I claim none of it. This story is otherwise written by me, and all original characters, places, and plots are owned by me.
A/N: Here is Lost In Dreams, version two. I've
edited it as much as I could while still remaining faithful to the
plot. Old readers may even find it difficult to recognize this
story—it has changed quite a bit! Still, I hope old readers enjoy
this story as much as they once did, and I hope new readers find more
to this than there once was. Me, I'm still surprised that there are
'Girl in ME' stories floating around this website, and even more
surprised that people are willing to read them and still enjoy them.
I won't claim to have the best of them right here or the most
unique. I'm not writing this because I drooled over Orlando Bloom
as he played Legolas. This story exists and continues to exist
because I love to write it—it's that simple.
I won't write
author's notes unless I have something important to say. So, here
it is, just this once: read on!
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Lost in Dreams
Chapter 1
It was all relatively unimportant.
The monotony of the average high school student's life was not something considered on a daily basis. Every girl and boy went through it without a moment's thought, hesitating only when it was too late, when the time had already passed to look back. The little things were inflated to excite the minds of teenagers, who sought gossip as if they had no other purpose. Appearance mattered, even to those who strutted about in what they claimed to be apathy. Grades mattered, but only to those thought hard enough to look ahead. Relationships were made and broken like the Lego sets of a simple past long forgotten or ignored. Emotions ran high—one could not walk through the halls of a school without sensing the Cupid's arrow or the fury of a dragon. Such was life.
Yes, it was all relatively unimportant. In the eyes of the student, however, it outweighed all else, and to most students, it was quite enough to handle.
Tori was one of these miserable beings—tortured at the sound of the first bell, jubilant at the last. In her view, however, the daily swing of emotions were so typical that, having grown accustomed to them, she assumed all was generally well as long as things flowed as they ought to. The odd surprise and moment of embarrassment throughout each week became expected, however horrible or fascinating. She, like most teenagers, had a singular best friend, a juicy yet secretive crush, a particularly malicious teacher, and a great deal of homework to which she always assigned a tirade, one eagerly shared by her friend.
"Even with all these exams, which, mind you, are meant to end the semester, teachers still feel as though it's their moral obligation to add more lessons—not by teaching, of course, but through ridiculously large amounts of homework!"
Lena nodded in agreement and slurped her strawberry smoothie. She and Tori sifted through an array of papers, trying desperately to find the missing notes that would aid them in completing the homework. It was noon, and while a number of students were pleasantly disregarding their exams and any homework they may have to do in favor of the lovely summer weather, eating their lunch by the newly cleaned pond, Tori and Lena chose to spend their lunch hour catching up on their school assignments, occasionally taking a large bite out of a sandwich or a cold pizza slice.
"Hah, I found it!" Lena exclaimed, and Tori looked up hopefully. "According to Planck's equation, the amount of quantum energy depends on…oh, no," murmured Lena dejectedly, "never mind. It doesn't say anything about a work function."
Tori moaned and buried her face in her hands. "I give up," she said in a muffled voice. "The semester ends in less than a week. We're graduating in less than a week. Who gives a damn about quantum whatever…"
"Senioritis." Lena chuckled. "We're graduating, and that's all the more reason to get this last stuff right!" Lena nudged Tori. "Come on, once it's over, it'll be over for good, right?"
"Obviously you think the glass is half full." Tori grudgingly picked up her pencil to begin working again.
"And obviously you think it's half empty."
"No, not at all. I just don't care what's in the glass." Tori stifled a yawn and peered wearily at the next problem on her worksheet. Lena looked at her for a moment, and then frowned.
"Tori," she began delicately, "it's only noon, and you look positively exhausted."
"I'm aware," murmured Tori without looking up from her work.
"Is there any point in asking…?"
"No. None at all."
Lena sighed. "Tori you've got to tell me at some point. I know you don't want to talk about it right now, but I can't ignore you yawning all the time and looking like you're just about to fall over. Promise me you'll tell me what's going on."
Tori glanced at her. Lena met her glance, sincere as always. It never occurred to Tori to actually tell Lena, despite the strength of their friendship. Lena told Tori everything, or at least she said she did, and Tori always knew what to say to help her, whether it was comfort after a nasty break-up or a simple smile to keep her going through the roughest days. Lena did the same for Tori, yet Tori could never pluck the courage to reveal her worst problems. She went to Lena for support when she earned herself the first detention of her school life, when she fled a classroom clutching a failed paper, or when she simply wanted to rant about the latest issues of high school drama. But when it came to her personal life, Tori remained distant. She couldn't explain even to herself why she felt so insecure at times, as though confiding in Lena would arouse unbearable humiliation. There was no deep, dark past of unspeakable horrors, nor was there any sort of abuse to report. Her problems, however personal, were not particularly devastating.
When Tori did not reply, Lena added, "You know, I can help you with whatever it is. And don't pretend you've already told me everything, because I know you haven't."
It was true. Tori had told her that she wasn't sleeping well, but she put the blame on all the homework and tests. When that excuse didn't work and Lena pressed further, Tori revealed a secret heartache who supposedly haunted her mind day and night. They both knew that Tori fancied the burly senior from their health class, but Lena did not know that Tori simply thought of him as eye candy, and had in fact declared him one of the most ignorant and obnoxious boys she had ever met. The excuse worked well and led to several weeks of gossip and giggling, but when Tori's sleepless nights persisted, the excuse began to fall on deaf ears.
Naturally, Lena had begun to think the truth was far worse than it actually was. Thoughts of domestic troubles, mental abuse, and even physical abuse led Lena to continuously badger Tori every time she appeared particularly tired and grumpy.
The truth was plain and simple, yet still personal. To an outsider, Tori would appear to sleep soundly, yet that was not the case. Her sleep was riddled with obscure dreams, confusing episodes with a surprising amount of detail. She lived through those dreams each night as though they were real, and when she woke up, she felt as though she hadn't slept at all. They usually lasted a mere five minutes, as Tori drifted from one dream to another, yet they appeared realistic, despite the imaginative content. Worse, she remembered her dreams vividly, so clearly that she spent each morning deciphering her latest dream, often appearing befuddled through breakfast and her first few classes.
In a desperate attempt to restore stability in her life, she decided to write down her dreams each morning, along with her puzzled thoughts, in a small black notebook. Her dreams would be stored away so that she could focus on the present reality. It had worked well, but it did not eliminate her exhaustion.
How would one explain such a strange dilemma? Tori thought it would be ridiculous to say she lost sleep because she had a dream. They weren't necessarily bad dreams, either, although Tori had considered that excuse. In any case, discussing dreams felt so personal to her, especially since she was trying to avoid thinking about them herself.
Tori sighed. "Lena, honestly, it's absolutely nothing. I already told you I have trouble sleeping. There's nothing else to it." Yet when Lena continued to look worried, Tori added, "It's not like there's some big dark secret I'm hiding. I'm not depressed, I'm not suicidal, my family is great, and all is well. Seriously, we have plenty here to worry about." Tori jabbed her pencil at the pile of papers in front of her. "Don't be bothered with me."
"If I didn't know you I'd think you were being sarcastic," Lena said, shaking her head. "Fine, then, let's get this over with."
That night, Tori dreamed about quantum energy and electrons escaping from atoms. It was one of the most mundane dreams yet, so dull that Tori didn't even bother writing about it in her journal. In fact, she considered it an improvement.
The next day was Friday, one of the most wonderful days to those students. The prospect of a relaxing night of procrastination and blissful ignorance kept everyone in a brighter mood than usual. It was perhaps this that thoroughly disguised Tori's more lively behavior, because Lena did not question it. Tori thought it was a shame that she didn't notice, because Lena would have liked that Tori's mysterious ailment was slowly disappearing. In any case, Tori didn't dare bring it up on her own—she planned to enjoy her Friday as well, without the discussion of any sort of dream, whether remarkable or monotonous.
Yet eventually, Lena did notice. Tori's nights continued to be filled with the usual dreams that most teenagers had—dreams involving the last thought on the sleeper's mind before drifting off. From humorous episodes in classrooms involving teachers dressed in ridiculous costumes to exceedingly dramatic scenes of romance with archetypical figures, Tori's dreams were finally normal. She woke each morning feeling refreshed and content, content that for once her sleep was undisturbed. Lena didn't ask what had caused the sudden change, for which Tori was relieved; she had no answer to that. But Lena did comment on her alertness on Monday morning with a smile.
"Really, Tori, I'm practically jealous." Lena yawned loudly. "What with all these tests today, I'm practically dead this morning, and you're...you're…dear lord, why on earth are you skipping?"
For Tori was grinning and almost prancing about the halls towards their first and most dreaded class. "Because in less than five days, Lena, the best movie in the whole world this year is going to hit the theaters!"
Lena raised an eyebrow. "Really? Is that what's been letting you sleep soundly at night now?"
"Of course not," replied Tori. "Come on, don't you remember?" But Lena hardly had time to shake her head before Tori answered gleefully, "The Lord of the Rings movie is coming out! They actually made a movie on Tolkien's books!"
Lena stared blankly at her.
"Fantasy?" added Tori, hoping to jolt Lena's memory. "With dwarves and orcs and elves, a shiny evil ring…"
Lena blinked.
"Starring Hugo Weaving, Ian McKellen, Elijah Wood—"
"OH my god, that one!" cried Lena. "He's only the hottest short man I've ever seen in a movie trailer! Wow, Tori, why didn't you mention him before?"
"Hobbit, not just a short man," corrected Tori. "And yes, that's the one." Tori clapped her hands in delight. "Didn't you notice that elf, too? The one with blond hair…he's drop-dead gorgeous…"
Lena nodded eagerly. "He's played by this guy named Orlando Bloom. Really, you've got to see some of his pictures!
"Well, I've already bought us tickets. Friday night, right after school, you and me. It's the first of a trilogy, and it's called The Fellowship of the Ring. It's about a couple of Hobbits, who—"
"Never mind the details," interrupted Lena. "I'm going for the eye candy, and you know it."
Like thousands of moviegoers around the world, Lena and Tori discovered the world of Tolkien that Friday night in awe. As they left the theater, Tori hummed the soundtrack while Lena kept up a commentary of the movie.
"…fantastic cinematography! Did you see all those shots in Moria? And really, I never was into fantasy, but that's one heck of a plot. Tori, you'll have to lend me those books as soon as we get back! The movie doesn't finish the plot, and I'm not waiting a year to hear the end of it! Besides, you said they left out some things, and…Tori?" Lena waved her hand in front of Tori's face. "Hello?"
"Hmm?" Tori blinked and looked at Tori's expectant face. "Oh, right, of course I'll lend them to you."
Lena rolled her eyes. "Still daydreaming about that elf? And I thought I was the one here for the eye candy."
"Well didn't you say you weren't so interested in the details? Here you are, asking me for the books themselves!" Tori laughed. "Well, I'm definitely coming back next weekend. School's over, so I have all the time I want to—"
"To see more of Legolas?" interrupted Lena teasingly.
"Mmmm, Legolas…" Tori smiled dreamily. "Really, why couldn't elves be real? He'd be mine in a flash."
Lena giggled. "Of course he would. Dream on."
Once Tori reached home, she dragged a chair to the wall across her bed. With a stapler in one hand, she fixed a large poster upon her wall, and then stood back to admire her new view. A fair face stared back at her with a fierce expression, an elaborate bow and arrow resting in his hands. His attire, clearly designed for battle, was accentuated by a deep green flowing cloak. The golden letters of the name 'Legolas' gleamed by the light of Tori's lamp. Flowing curves mixed with ivy leaves bordered the poster. Tori beamed; it was beautiful.
As she prepared for bed, she began to hum her favorite tunes from the movie, reminding herself to buy the soundtrack as soon as she could. Once tucked comfortably in her blanket, she turned out the light. As darkness settled into her room, Tori kept her eyes upon the handsome elf on the poster. Even by the dim glow of a distant streetlight, Tori could see the fair features of the elf.
If such chivalrous men could exist, wondered Tori, thinking of the ranger named Aragorn, no woman would feel unloved. Really, the days of the sword and shield or knife and bow upon horseback must have been more romantic than the modern, fast-paced society, where people merely desired more of the biggest, fastest, and newest material things.
A grandfather clock from the living room far from Tori's bedroom began to chime soft, low notes, signaling midnight's arrival. Tori's eyes became heavy as the dull yet soothing tones of the clock mixed with the occasional sound of rustling leaves; Tori preferred to leave her window open since the sounds of the silent night calmed her. A breeze flowed through and tickled Tori's feet. The tranquility of her bedroom closed in upon Tori, and the last thing she saw before falling asleep was the alert eyes of the elf, lit so brightly that Tori almost felt that he was gazing at her.
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A/N: I hope you enjoyed this first chapter to a very new Lost in Dreams. I will not be uploading any other chapter until I complete around 10 chapters. So, consider this first chapter a preview of the story. Please review and let me know what you think! Old readers, let me know what you think of the changes! I will certainly reply to all reviewers. Any criticism is welcome. Thank you all in advance.