A.N I know these updates have been coming thick and fast and I'm probably unnecessarily raising all your hopes that I will be able to continue with this frenetic pace but to be honest at the moment I am so caught up in this story that I just can't stop typing. LOL. Well I hope you all enjoy it. The reviews that I have been recieving so far have been phenomenal and I have been overwhelmed so thank you so much to everyone who has read and reviewed. Let the angst continue.
A Time Best Forgotten.
Part One.
The Woman That Nobody Forgot.
Taylor sat at the table completely at a loss as to what she should do next. It had been two days since Haley had returned and she had barely seen her. She had tried to drag her from her room but had been unsuccessful. She had considered withholding food from her until she came downstairs but the truth was that she was scared that Haley would just not eat. So she had taken to leaving food trays outside of her room hoping that if she at least kept her fed then she would heal enough that she could start to deal with her mental scars. But enough was enough and today she had finally reached the end of her rapidly fraying rope. Zach was in his room napping and Taylor was on a mission. She filled the bathtub to almost overflowing with tepid water determined that this wake up call would have the desired result.
On the rare occasions that Taylor had seen her in the past few days leaving the sanctity of her bedroom only to use the bathroom Haley had barely even looked at her not bothering to respond to a single question or acerbic barb directed at her by Taylor. She had tried everything cajoling her, screaming at her even ignoring her but nothing had worked. Haley remained locked in her own world, hidden away from everything that could hurt her, oblivious to everyone and everything around her.
Taylor grabbed the bucket dipping it into the rapidly filling tub and bringing it out brimming with water. She shut off the faucets and stalked towards Haley's room taking out her key she opened the door. She was sick and tired of knocking on the door and being ignored and she was not going to do that anymore. Now she just let herself in and waited for Haley to acknowledge her presence but Haley remained where she was lying on her bed facing away from the door. Taylor put down the bucket and walked over to the bed.
"Haley get up we need to talk."
"Go away Taylor," she responded not even bothering to turn her head to look at her sister as she made her demand.
"This is my house damn it Haley and if I say we're going to talk then we are going to talk. Now its time to cut the shit, you've been holed up in here ever since you got back."
Taylor stopped, breathing hard after her outburst waiting for Haley's response. But she still didn't even look at her.
"Fine if that's the way you want it," Taylor said storming over to the doorway where she had left the bucket of water. Picking it up she tossed it over Haley and watched as she finally showed some sign of life shrieking as she got up from the bed her movements still hampered by her injuries.
"Taylor what the hell are you doing?"
"I told you we need to talk." Taylor said hands on hips glaring at her.
"I have nothing to say to you or anyone else for that matter so why don't you just leave me the hell alone and if it's such an issue for you that I'm in your house then I'll leave but you might want to remember that I grew up here too."
Taylor sighed exasperatedly. "Haley I don't want you to leave but for God's sake will you at least get out of your pyjamas and come downstairs once in a while. Zach is confused he keeps seeing some strange lady walking between here and the bathroom. Don't you think it's time you spent some time with your nephew."
"Why would he even care Taylor he doesn't even know me?"
"Yeah well whose fault is that Haley? You're his aunty and he doesn't know you from a bar of soap."
Haley turned away from her biting her lower lip the way she did when she was anxious about something. "I can't Taylor, he's three years old I'd probably scare him if he saw me like this. I don't want to do that to him. Seeing me like this would probably give him nightmares. Do you really wish that on him?"
"Actually Haley he's four and trust me he's tougher than you think he is. I can't believe you don't even know how old he is. He'd have to be tough with me for a mom right?" she said with a hint of sarcasm.
Haley felt the smallest semblance of a smile cross her lips and immediately forced her face back into its neutral state she couldn't remember the last time she had smiled it felt like a lifetime ago. She didn't deserve to smile. No-one as dirty as her did.
Taylor stared at her a moment more before groaning with frustration and walking out the door. The idea of forcing Haley into the partially cold tub of water forgotten, she was pretty sure it would do no good anyway. If she wouldn't listen to her then maybe there was someone that she would. It wouldn't be an easy call to make but it would be worth it if she could just get them to listen. At this stage she wasn't sure that there was another person that could get through to her. She had been considering the possibility of calling her all day but had prayed that there would be some other answer and now she knew that there wasn't.
Going downstairs she pulled out the piece of paper that she had jotted the number on that morning and not allowing herself to think for another moment punched in the numbers. She listened to it ring half with nervous anticipation half with impatience she was terrified of hearing the voice on the other end of the phone and with each passing second the urge to hang up grew stronger. But she forced herself to remain on the phone and then just when she was sure that there would be no answer she heard the click to indicate someone had picked up followed by a breathless "Hello,".
She took a deep breath and burst into speech. "Brooke its Taylor…Uh Taylor James. I was wondering if we could talk."
There was an incalculable pause and Taylor could almost hear the wheels turning in the other woman's head.
"What could you possibly want to talk to me about?" she asked sharply but behind it her natural curiosity shone through. But there was a guarded edge to her tone as she asked the question almost as if she dreaded to hear the answer to her question.
"It's Haley," Taylor said half expecting the phone to slam down in her ear but the only sound she heard was the steady breathing of the woman at the other end of the phone.
"Well I'm afraid if that's the case then I'm not interested. Call someone else."
"Brooke I know how you feel about her and I get it I really do but there is no-one else for me to call. Do you think if there was that I would be calling you? You don't want to talk to me anymore than I want to talk to you but this isn't about me and you this is about Haley."
"Yeah well you see Taylor here's the thing I personally couldn't care less about either of you. Haley had her chances and she blew each and every one of them now if you don't mind I was on my way out the door when you called and I really should be going. Actually you know what I don't give a shit if you mind or not. As far as I'm concerned this conversation is over." But before she could slam down the phone the way she so longed to do Taylor's voice reached her again.
"Brooke please you don't understand. Haley she's not in a good way. She really needs her friends right now."
"Well then I suggest you call them. Oh wait unless she doesn't have any anymore. Let me guess she blew off all her celebrity friends the same way she blew off me and…" There was a pause before she continued "me and Peyton."
"Brooke Chris is in jail."
"Yeah well from what I've heard about the way his singing career has been going lately that might be the best place for him. From what I've heard he's been murdering his songs lately anyway but hey I guess that's what happens when the drugs start meaning more to you than the music. Don't bother trying to deny that he has a drug problem I've seen the pictures just like everyone else." Brooke said cattily.
"Brooke he's in jail for rape and assault. He attacked Haley and from what the doctors can tell it wasn't the first time not by a long shot."
Brooke paused and for a moment Taylor could have sworn that she heard her whisper "I knew it," before assuring herself that she must have been mistaken. There was no way Brooke could have already known about this was there? There was something nagging at the back of her mind begging for further attention but she pushed it aside for now she had to concentrate on Brooke in the here and now.
"Please Brooke can you come back to Tree Hill. I can't get through to her and if someone doesn't soon I don't know what will happen. I'm terrified Brooke I wouldn't be calling you if I wasn't."
Brooke knew in her heart that that was true. She and Taylor James had decided long ago that they had nothing to talk about and would both be quite happy never to see each other again. There had never been anything that could be described as a friendship between the two but they had both tried for Haley's sake but once she had gone there was no need to pretend any longer and the two had slipped into polite civility on the rare occasions they were forced to spend any time together in the same room. That was until the news had come out that Taylor was pregnant with Lucas' child. Brooke had left town soon after but not without offering the pregnant woman a few choice phrases on exactly what she thought about her.
But it was not only her feelings towards the elder James sister that was preventing her from saying an immediate yes. There were also a great many things that had occurred between her and Haley in the past that gave her cause for hesitation. She had tried a long time ago to help Haley and had had it thrown back in her face and could think of no reason why should she put herself through that again. She sincerely doubted that there would be any gratitude on Haley's part and it would also mean subjecting herself to the pain of seeing Lucas with his family. Sure she knew through the people that she still kept in touch with in Tree Hill that Lucas and Taylor had never really made a go of their relationship despite their best efforts for their child, but seeing Lucas with his child was going to be something that she wasn't sure she could bear. It was hard enough knowing that another woman had given him the child that she herself had hoped to one day bless him with but to actually see them that was another thing altogether. Sure she had made a life for herself in San Diego but that didn't mean that there was a day that went by that she didn't think about Lucas and what might have been. Sighing she forced her thoughts away from Lucas this was not about him, this was about Haley.
She wanted to harden her heart to the other woman that had once meant so much to her and refuse to go to her in her time of need but she couldn't help imagining the anguish the other woman must be going through. She had never been raped herself and could only begin to imagine how hard it must be for her and to have it happen at the hands of your husband the person who is supposed to love you more than anyone. She didn't want to think about the sort of emotional scars that must have left.
Just as Taylor was starting to wonder if perhaps she was listening to nothing more than dead air she heard the other woman sigh before saying in a quiet voice "I'll come. Just give me a few days to organise a flight and sort out my work but I'll be there by Tuesday night at the latest."
"Thanks Brooke, ah if you need anywhere to stay you could always…"
But she didn't get to finish as Brooke cut her off almost immediately. "That won't be necessary," she assured the other woman before hanging up the phone. She may be starting to doubt her sanity by agreeing to return to Tree Hill but she wasn't ready for the Looney bin yet and the only way she would ever stay in that house with Taylor James and her child was if she took complete leave of her senses.
Sighing she sat staring at the phone in shock hardly able to believe the conversation that she had just taken part in. If she didn't know better she would almost swear that it had been a dream but deep down she knew that it had been real and as hard as it had been she had made the right decision. Whether she would still think that when she arrived back in Tree Hill remained to be seen but she couldn't allow herself to worry about that now or she would talk herself out of going. The temptation to do just that was strong but she fought it. Just because Haley had let her down well that didn't mean that she had to do the same. Besides it would only be for a week at the most she would fly down there visit with Haley and then she would come back here. She would come back and resume her life and once again put Tree Hill and all of its inhabitants behind her.
Standing up she walked to the desk searching through her organiser for the number for her office she needed to let them know as soon as possible that she would be leaving town for a few days and someone else would need to fill in with her clients. Then she needed to call the airline and arrange a flight and after that she would need to organise someone to keep an eye on her apartment and feed her fish. There was a lot to do if she was going to leave town in the next couple of days.
For the next few hours she kept herself busy running around taking care of errands and making phone calls. She barely paused to eat the microwave dinner that she pulled from a freezer filled with them. When finally she was done she went upstairs to take a long hot soak in the tub and try to rid her mind and body of the steadily growing anxiety that the thought of her return to Tree Hill filled her with. After finishing she got out towelling herself dry quickly before dressing in a camisole and pyjama bottoms and crawling into bed. Physically she was exhausted but her mind continued to race leading her to realise that sleep was going to be a long time in coming.
Her mind drifted back to the day in New York when she had found out the truth about Mrs Keller and her so called fairy tale marriage. She had arrived at their apartment full of sadness and apprehension. She and Haley had barely spoken since the latter had left Tree Hill and Brooke surmised that they were probably both at fault but this was something that Haley needed to be told about and she had to find out in person a phone call would not suffice. That was what led her to be standing outside the door to the penthouse on the cold wintry New York afternoon gathering the courage to knock.
Finally she raised her hand to the door knocking sharply and hoping for a response. She prayed that Chris would not be here she needed to talk to Haley without his domineering presence. She could hear someone standing at the other side of the door and once again hoping that luck was with her and it would not be Chris she called out. "Haley is that you, it's me Brooke I have to talk to you."
She could hear the nervous shuffle of feet on the other side of the door and growled impatiently. "Haley will you please open up the damn door? I really need to speak to you."
"Um now really isn't a good time Brooke. I'm actually kind of busy."
"Screw that Haley I did not just come all the way from Tree Hill for you to just refuse to see me now open the door goddamn it."
"Brooke please I told you now is just not a good time. Look I'll um call you tomorrow or something."
"Haley we have to talk now. Damn it why are you being so stubborn. I've come here trying to do the right thing so you don't have to get this news over the phone and you won't even let me in. Guess that's what I get for giving a shit huh? Well don't worry I won't make that mistake again." She turned and began to flounce away from the door. She was furious with Haley but she was just as angry with the world. If there was any justice then she wouldn't have to be here anyway. Peyton would be alive and Brooke would not be left with the job of telling one of her oldest friends that she was dead. As if it wasn't hard enough just dealing with the news herself she had felt the need to actually come here in person to deliver the news to Haley but fat lot of good that had done her. She should have known better it had become increasingly obvious that Haley didn't give a fuck about anyone anymore other than her rock star husband and her fake ass celebrity pals. She hadn't bothered to keep in touch with any of the ones that she had left behind and that had hurt Brooke more than she cared to admit. So why had she come here today thinking that anything would be any different? Why had she convinced herself that Haley did give a toss about anyone other than herself? She didn't know the answer to any of those questions and at that moment she wished she could say that she didn't care enough to find out but she knew that that wasn't the truth. Sighing with frustration she turned around determined to give it one more try.
To her surprise she found Haley standing in the doorway waiting for her, the majority of her face hidden behind a curtain of hair. For someone who was making millions she apparently didn't employ a very good stylist Brooke couldn't help but think as she took in her appearance. She was dressed in jeans and a sweatshirt both of which appeared to be swimming on her and neither one of them appeared to be in the best condition. God Brooke thought so much for the lifestyles of the rich and famous. "Come in," she said simply standing back so Brooke could precede her into the apartment.
Brooke looked around her taking in the magnificent décor of the room they stood in "Wow," she said slightly awestruck "this is some place." Maybe this fame thing does have its perks.
Haley led them over to where they could sit comfortably and sat down indicating that Brooke should do the same. Brooke couldn't help but notice that Haley was limping slightly as she walked and silently wondered what had happened. Looking over at the woman sitting opposite her she couldn't help but notice that Haley wasn't even looking at her, she kept her gaze planted firmly on her feet, her hair still masking almost all of her face. Brooke could feel her anger beginning to grow as she wondered why Haley had even bothered to invite her in if she was now going to ignore her but she tamped down on those feelings forcing herself to concentrate on the issue at hand.
"Haley um the reason I'm here well…. I don't really know how to tell you this. Haley, Peyton's dead. She was hit by a car yesterday."
Haley's head shot up at her words all thoughts of protecting herself from Brooke's piercing gaze forgotten as she absorbed the news. Brooke gasped in surprise as she saw the ugly bruising surrounding Haley's left eye.
"Oh my God Haley what happened?"
Haley flinched as her hand automatically went to her face attempting to hide the evidence from Brooke's all seeing gaze. "I uh…Well it was quite silly really I tripped while I was in the bedroom the other day and hit my eye on the corner of my bedside table. Only me huh?" she said lightly trying to laugh off the concerned look in Brooke's eyes. "You know what a klutz I am always falling over something."
Brooke stared at her disbelievingly seeing the truth behind the other woman's words. She could pretend that everything was fine but Brooke saw right through her pretence right to the heart and soul of the matter. "Haley how long has this been going on and don't bother trying to tell me that there isn't anything going on I've seen the way you're limping and that bruise is not from tripping over. God Haley what do you take me for?"
"I don't know what you're talking about Brooke." Despite Brooke's warning Haley still attempted to deny the truth blazing blatantly from her eyes.
"Haley get your bags we're getting you out of here right now. Just grab what you need we'll buy anything else when we get to Tree Hill."
"Brooke don't be crazy I'm not going to Tree Hill with you my life is here so is my husband. I'll um talk to Chris about coming to the funeral but I uh don't think that day is good for us."
"Haley I haven't even told you what day the funeral is now cut the shit you and I need to get out of here now. You cannot stay here."
"Brooke I told you I'm not going anywhere now as for the funeral well perhaps you can tell me when it is and I'll see what I can do about being there."
Brooke stared at her incredulously. "You can not stay here. Haley he hit you for fucks sake."
"How dare you," Haley yelled at the other woman. "How dare you come in here and start making accusations against my husband. Everything is perfect between us and I resent you for implying otherwise."
"Haley look I just care about you. I don't want to see you be hurt and no man who would do this to you deserves any of your loyalty."
"Brooke you don't know a damn thing about us now I think you should leave. Call me when you have the details of the funeral and like I said I'll do my best to be there."
"Haley please I'm begging you just come with me."
"Brooke you don't know what you're talking about now get the hell out of my house before I call security."
"Fine," Brooke yelled back her own anger finally getting the best of her but you just remember this day. You remember that I offered you a way out and you wouldn't take it. I'll see you at the funeral."
Grabbing her purse she stormed out the door not saying another word and slammed it behind her.
Lucas had noticed how upset she was when she had returned from New York but she had fobbed him off telling him that since her best friend in the world just died she was more than a little entitled to be upset. She could see in his eyes that he didn't really believe her but he hadn't pushed her on it resolving to ask her after the funeral. But that opportunity had never come and now here she was almost five years later preparing to return to the one place she had promised herself she never would. She was going home.
Less than two days later she sat in her rental car driving towards Tree Hill. She was going through a myriad of emotions nervousness, fear, and self doubt but although she wished she could deny it there was also a certain degree of excitement. This was her chance to prove to herself that she was a different person to the broken woman that had walked away from her home town five years ago. She could show them all that no matter what they had done to her she had survived and not only survived but flourished.
An image of Haley's face complete with black eye just the way she had seen her the last time popped into her mind and she exhaled heavily. She wasn't sure what she could do for the other woman. She hadn't wanted to listen last time so what on earth was going to be different now. Her words to her five years ago had obviously had no effect as evidenced by the huge wreath of flowers that had arrived on the day of Peyton's funeral. There had been a card expressing her condolences and a note from her giving her apologies that she would be unable to attend the funeral. Until that moment Brooke had allowed herself to hope and even believe that Haley would come back that she would not be able to stay away from one of her oldest friends funerals. The moment she had seen that wreath of ridiculously expensive flowers that hope had died as had any remnants of their friendship that had remained.
At least that was what she had told herself and she had remained convinced of that right up until Taylor's voice had delivered the verification of her long held suspicions. Even though she had known it deep down she had pushed that knowledge aside refusing to admit to it consciously until it had been thrust so blatantly in her face. Now she knew and she could no longer pretend to herself or anyone else that she didn't. She had to return to Tree Hill and face up to the many demons from her past and somehow attempt to help the one person who was probably the last person who wanted her help.
She pulled the car up in front of the James house and looked at it apprehensively. There were two cars parked in the drive but there was little sign of movement inside the house. Getting out of the car she walked to the front door ringing the bell and waited nervously for an answer. She had prepared herself mentally for the anguish she was sure she would feel seeing Taylor and her child but she was not prepared for the sight that greeted her. The door opened and she froze taking in the image in front of her wordlessly.
"Oh my God Brooke?"
"Hi Lucas," she said deliberately keeping her tone light as she took in the sight of the man she had loved for the better part of her life and his child perched high on his shoulders. In that moment her heart broke all over again.