Pairings: None this chapter
Spoilers: Mentions technology used in Proving Ground.
Season: Pre season 8
Author's Note: This is probably the longest time between updates in the history of fanfiction. All I can really say about that is sorry. When I wrote the first chapter I had no idea that something more was going to come of it, but awhile later (with the help of the people who reviewed) I decided that I liked the idea enough to make a longer story out of it. So, sorry for the delay, hopefully this was worth the wait. I've got ideas for more chapters, and it shouldn't take much to update this story faster than I have been
I do have to put a time frame within the day, so this all makes sense: the briefing last chapter happened at about 0800, Jack and Sam left with Thor at about 0900, and they get back at the very beginning of this chapter at about 1700 that night.
This time it's Daniel's thoughts that are in italics.
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Chapter 2: Daniel
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Jack and Sam arrived back in the gate room with a flash of light. A few of the airmen stationed there raised their weapons momentarily but dropped them as soon as the dazzling light dimmed enough for them to see who'd beamed down.
"Welcome back," came the familiar voice of Sergeant Harriman from the control room. "General Hammond wants to see you in his office immediately.
"You got it," Jack yelled up to the sergeant, who looked surprised to see him speaking aloud. However, if Jack's answer had been reflecting his current mood he would have moaned his reply. Six hours of diplomacy and they're can't even get a shower before the debriefing.
Jack tried not to wonder whether he'd have been allowed that shower had they returned by Stargate, a much more expedient mode of transportation. Sam had shot that idea down back on the planet by reminding Jack of the mess they'd left of Thor's ship, and Thor seemed inclined to agree. Jack was about to remind them that Thor had conjured all those papers out of thin air in the first place and probably had a similar way of destroying them, but the part of his brain that spoke in Daniel's voice had informed him that helping their most powerful ally, even with menial tasks, was a good idea. A mental argument had ensued, and since Jack decided to stop short of actually yelling at his own head, his usual remedy for dealing with both Daniel and his mental version of the archaeologist, Daniel had won.
Thus, Jack and Sam trudged up the stairs. Jack had only a few thoughts to sustain him: (1) those aliens were one of the few races they'd met that actually had a decent sense of humor, (2) he had his voice back, (3) he could finally get back at Daniel for teasing him, (4) he had his voice back, (5) he hadn't had to wear his dress blues for the trip back, and (6) he had his voice back. About thirty seconds after they'd been beamed aboard Thor's ship, Jack had ducked around the nearest corner and changed back into his green fatigues. Sam, who had changed into her dress uniform on base in the first place, hadn't faired nearly so well, and, with a pang of guilt, Jack saw that she was walking rather tenderly, evidence that standing for hours in high heels had finally gotten to her.
The debriefing was relatively painless, and within half an hour Jack had washed off all the negotiating cooties in that long awaited shower and was in the commissary snacking on a piece of pie. A few minutes later, Daniel came in, along with a group of airman. Jack looked up as the archaeologist sat down across from him and noticed that one airman had detached himself from the group, which was headed for the other side of the room, and made for the next table over instead.
Jack wasn't sure what Daniel could have done while he was gone to earn himself an escort, but hoped he could somehow use the fact to his advantage. Thus far his plan had been pretty indistinct; simply pretend he still couldn't talk until Daniel said something Jack could really nail him on. However, that plan was quickly being foiled as Daniel seemed determined to make Jack start the conversation, whether he thought the colonel could talk or not.
Finally, Jack could take it no longer and said, "So, Daniel, what's up?"
If Daniel was surprised with Jack's newfound ability to speak he didn't show it, instead he suddenly sprang to his feet, looking livid, and sneered in a Goa'uld voice, "How dare you speak to me with such insolence? Kneel before your god!"
Most people currently inhabiting the commissary were watching them now. Some looked fearful, but the rest seemed to have realized that even if Daniel had been taken over by a Goa'uld, the parasite wouldn't have gone and advertised the fact in the middle of a room full of airmen. Those people merely looked confused. Jack noticed, much to his own chagrin, that the airmen who had arrived at the same time as Daniel were laughing hysterically, as was Daniel's escort. Jack himself had nearly tipped backwards in his chair from the shock of it, but had luckily managed to regain his senses and composure before he did anything stupid, or painful.
What was Daniel doing with a voice modulator anyway? This was no doubt to make sure Jack couldn't live down his own unintended impression of a Goa'uld in the briefing room that morning too easily. There was something odd about it, though. The modulators typically gave a very convincing performance, but Daniel's voice had somehow sounded very hollow. And, as Jack observed the scientist sitting down, he had yet to turn the device off, even though the joke was long over. Jack took a moment to consider the matter. The voice modulators used mostly vibrations from the chest and throat to create that fiendishly eerie feedback, but it still needed the person's actual voice to-
Oh…
Ha!
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Backing up a little
Daniel had been feeling very smug throughout his entire one-sided conversation with Jack in the commissary right up until the Colonel had been beamed up by Thor. After he'd learned the nature and purpose for Jack's alien abduction it had taken every ounce of better judgement he possessed to keep from cursing Thor's preference of Jack over him. The man couldn't even talk. However, Daniel took consolation in the fact that Jack probably wished Daniel were going in his place about as much as he did, and used that knowledge to help force his temper into line as he retreated to his office.
Daniel spent the better part of the day hard at work on a translation. As was his usual practice, he tended to mutter aloud then as he wrote his translation down. He was so engrossed in his work that he barely noticed how often he was clearing his throat or that his voice was getting steadily more and more hoarse. The dilemma didn't become apparent to him until he was speaking to another archaeologist's assistant and his voice cracked spectacularly, a problem that was only exasperated by the fact that she was rather attractive and Daniel had been trying to play it cool.
His day went steadily downhill from there, until it was quite obvious that whatever bug Jack had, he had given it to Daniel. He had a pretty good idea what Doctor Fraiser would tell him, but felt obligated to visit the infirmary anyway, although it was mostly due to the rule that any injury or illness sustained on base or off world had to be officially filed.
Doctor Fraiser told him exactly what he expected, but also insisted on a full blood test to "check for the possibility of alien contagions" since she'd never seen such a vehement sore throat without the other symptoms of a cold or flu, let alone a contagious one.
Daniel left the infirmary in a much bitterer mood than he'd arrived with, not that he'd really expected to hear anything different, although a cure would have been nice. He often considered his luck with speech to be one of his only saving graces on a base full of gung ho military personnel and soon developed the opinion that walking through the hallways without the means to defend himself verbally was about as intelligent as walking into a Goa'uld fortress without a gun.
That was what led him to the voice modulators. Even if he had no voice at all, they still worked well enough, and had the added benefit of instilling fear in whomever he was talking to. However, after he'd been held up at gunpoint for the third time in a row, he was rather tired of that part of the deal, and thus recruited an airman to follow him around and make sure he wasn't shot on sight, which was about as far as he'd gotten when he heard Jack and Sam were back, and immediately gone to find his commanding officer, hastily concocting a plan.
A plan which thoroughly abandoned Daniel about ten seconds into his conversation with Jack. Daniel was well aware that Jack was much more intelligent than he made out to be, but usually chose to ignore the fact whenever it suited him, which is why he was caught so off guard when Jack seemed to completely see through his scam after he'd only gotten to say one miserable thing. Jack was currently eyeing him with a very self-satisfied look, which made Daniel want to squirm a little.
"You might want to turn that off now," Jack suggested. "I think you're scaring all the little scientists."
"I don't know," Daniel shrugged, leaving the modulator on. "I kind of like it."
"You like sounding like a snake head?" Jack seemed disgusted.
"It feels kind of powerful, talking like this," Daniel replied.
"I guess you would like that," Jack said.
Daniel shot him a look. "The Tok'ra talk like this too."
"I said snake head, not Goa'uld," Jack reminded him.
Quick as a flash, Jack reached forward and relieved Daniel of the voice modulator, ripping the microphone and speaker from is chest and the battery pack and control box from an inner pocket. Robbed of his ability to object to this robbery, it was all the archeologist could do to stare and gape, rubbing his arm where the battery pack had collided with it. In the meantime, Jack had taken to twirling the voice modulator triumphantly.
"How's it going, Daniel? Nice to know you're not a Goa'uld. Very nice impression by the way.
Daniel rolled his eyes.
Well done. You can remember what I said.
"So," Jack continued. "The tables are turned." Several diabolical ideas were clearly dancing around behind his eyes.
Daniel glared at his tormentor with all the defiance he could muster.
"Well, what goes around…"
…comes around, I know.
"You just through the end of that cliché, didn't you?" Jack said happily.
Daniel rolled his eyes.
Of course I did.
Jack squirmed in his seat and sat up a little straighter.
Daniel raised his eyebrows and lifted the corners of his mouth slightly.
Caught that wave, did you?
Jack's mouth dropped open, but he managed to recover before Daniel could articulate another rebuttal.
"Have you tried the tea? It's supposed to work wonders."
Works wonders on what?
Daniel irritably rubbed his tongue on the roof of his mouth, feeling his burned taste buds. Yes, he'd tried the tea. After coming across the second sore throat in a day, Doctor Fraiser had been rather eager to try and find a remedy.
"No good, then?" Jack asked.
Daniel shook his head.
"Too bad," Jack replied. "Guess you'll just have to wait it out then."
Thanks for all your reassurances.
"You could make yourself some cards to hold up so people can tell what you're trying to say." Jack suggested.
Or you could just give me that voice modulator back.
"Then again, you do talk a lot and tend to say different things all the time," Jack continued thoughtfully. "You'd probably be better by the time you finished writing down everything you say."
Funny, if I tilt my head to the left and stick my finger in my right ear that almost sounds like a compliment.
"What are you doing?"
Nothing. Just, you know, earwax.
They weren't quite through with giving each other strange looks when Sergeant Harriman's voice rang through the intercom.
"Doctor Jackson, please report to General Hammond's office."
Daniel was half way out of his chair before he realized that there was a problem with this scenario. He and Jack might be able to carry on a more or less normal conversation even if only one of them could speak, but verbal responses were usually required during meetings with General Hammond.
For all Jack's apparent lack of intelligence, he seemed to have figured out that fact quite a bit faster than Daniel, but instead of making himself useful and offering over the voice modulator, he merely smiled crookedly up at the archeologist.
"I think you have someplace to be."
Daniel scowled and turned to go, but didn't remain alone for long. Apparently, Jack had decided that he would get more enjoyment out of watching Daniel continue to squirm than finishing his pie.
Still, there were some benefits to this development. Jack never withheld any aid he could give to his teammates when they were off world, and while it was true that General Hammond was no alien menace, perhaps if Jack saw Daniel in hot enough water he would hand over the voice modulator.
Jack remained behind in the briefing room, waving goodbye to Daniel as he knocked and entered General Hammond's office.
"Ah, Doctor Jackson," General Hammond said, straightening a few stray papers on his desk. "Please sit down."
Daniel sat.
"I've got a diplomatic mission for you," Hammond began. "Major Carter's preliminary analysis of the soil on P2Y-386 indicates high levels of naquadah."
Daniel's eyes flicked up and then back to General Hammond, just as blank as they'd been before, having gained no insight from their brief perusal of the ceiling.
"That's what we've designated the planet Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter visited with Thor today," Hammond clarified. "I'd like you to travel there and negotiate a trade agreement."
Daniel nodded hesitantly.
"Although I suppose that will have to wait until you've got your voice back," Hammond continued.
Daniel stared. Hammond knew?
"Three airmen in addition to you have also fallen victim to whatever was ailing Colonel O'Neill this morning," Hammond explained. "I know that's the reason for your silence. However, I'd heard that you figured out a way to speak anyway. A voice modulator, isn't it?"
Daniel nodded, glancing momentarily to where Jack was watching them through the window.
"Ah," Hammond said, following his gaze. "Say no more."
No trouble there.
Hammond stood up and left and a moment later Daniel was eavesdropping on his conversation with Jack.
"Do you currently have a voice modulator in your possession, Colonel?"
"Yes, sir."
"Hand it over."
"Yes, sir."
"Don't you have work to do?"
"Yes, sir."
Hammond returned and handed the voice modulator back to a smirking Daniel.
"Under ordinary circumstances, I'd think it best for Colonel O'Neill and the rest of SG-1 to return with you, since he's already established a rapport with these people. However, considering the current situation, you'll be going with SG-12 instead."
"Thank you, sir," Daniel replied, his grateful tone completely overpowered by his Goa'uld voice.