Author's Note: I think I've been indulging my Robin Hood passion far too much lately. A plot bunny bit me and refused to let go, and this is the result. Sure, I may have twisted some facts and made things up here and there, but hey, what are legends for if not to be embellished? If you don't like it, tough.
Disclaimer: Robin Hood and all associations are the stuff of legend. I do not own them, nor would I wish to (no smelly wolfsheads wandering around my house, thank you very much!) I do however own myself, Kitten owns herself, and we both stake a claim of ownership for Kelby, although she doesn't know it yet. This has been written purely for pleasure, and I make no material gain from it whatsoever.
I swirled my drink around in its glass and stared across the pub garden and towards the distant strands of oak and pine. I had a sudden mad urge to vault over the fence and run into the forest and climb a few trees, commune with nature, that sort of thing. It was the middle of July and the shade of the forest really appealed to me right now. I hated cities because they always made me feel claustrophobic and hemmed in, and Nottingham was no different. I consoled myself with the fact that I would only have to endure two more days here and then I could return home to the seaside town of Bournemouth. Nottingham's only saving grace was the forest of Sherwood to the north of the city, and I would have to endure the siren call of the forest until I left, or until I could persuade my friends to go for a ramble.
We had agreed to spend a week in Nottingham to coincide with the Green Day gig that we all had tickets for. That had been on Tuesday and it was now Wednesday, and we were recovering from excess consumption of alcohol by consuming more alcohol. My friends, Kitten James and Kelly Black, were currently at the bar and as I glanced through the window I could see Kels flirting with one of the guys at the bar, tossing her long blonde hair over her shoulder as she laughed at something he said. Kit looked up, caught my eye, and rolled her eyes at Kels. I snorted and yawned widely, trying to tell her I was bored and to hurry up. She seemed to understand and elbowed Kels in the ribs. I grinned and turned my face back towards the forest.
The girls rejoined me within seconds and I took hold of my second drink of the day from Kels.
"It's hot," she moaned, struggling out of her Green Day hoodie to reveal a plain black tank top underneath. She stretched her legs out on the bench, idly flicking a beetle off her blue jeans.
"It's summer," replied Kit off-handedly, leaning back in her seat and placing her feet on the table. She was dressed as always in hunter green leather pants and a black halter neck top with slashes down the side. She idly scrunched up her long brown hair and let it fall again, the sun picking out her natural highlights.
"It wasn't this hot yesterday," Kels pointed out. "In fact, correct me if I'm wrong, but it was raining yesterday."
"Welcome to England, ladies," I said with a smile. Kit was from Ohio and Kels from Chicago; they had moved to England to attend drama school in London. We had been friends for years, having met over the Internet, and I had recently acquired a transfer from Revenue and Customs in Bournemouth to London so I could live with them.
"Oi, Elli," said Kels suddenly, turning to me and glaring. "I was having fun with that guy," she added with a pout.
"He wasn't your type and anyway, I was bored," I replied easily, tucking my chin-length red-and-black hair back behind my ears. I unzipped my plain black hoodie and tied it around my waist; Kels was right, it was hot.
"Nice shirt," remarked Kels. I was wearing an off-the-shoulder black top with a pink spray-painted heart-and-skull motif on the side, bearing the legend 'The Decadence of Love' in white, and I had a white sleeveless shirt underneath that.
"Thanks. It's old," I remarked casually. "And I'm hot," I added as an afterthought.
"Black's not really the colour for summer," pointed out Kit; I was also wearing black flared jeans and Doc Marten boots.
"Meh. I'll live. Me big mean goth. Me wear black," I replied with a grunt.
"What are we going to do today?" asked Kit after a short silence.
"Getting rid of this hangover would be a good idea," muttered Kels.
"Have something to eat?" I suggested. "I usually have a fry-up after a big night out." Kels shook her head violently.
"Ugh, no! If I have anything to eat I'll be sick!" she moaned.
"Well I had more to drink than you and I'm all right," said Kit smugly.
"That's because you're still pissed," I teased. "Give it half an hour and you'll feel rougher than a sand-dwellers bottom."
"Pleasant image."
"Thanks."
"That still doesn't answer the question of what we're going to do today." I sighed and gazed towards the forest again.
"We could always go for a walk…"
So it was an hour later Kit, Kels and I entered Sherwood Forest. A chill ran down my spine as I stepped under the branches of the first tree, but I shrugged it off as just the effect of entering the cool, leafy shade of the trees after sitting in the sun. Kit however was more prone to listening to her instincts and stopped dead.
"There's been a lot of blood shed in this forest," she whispered.
"Of course. This is one of the places where Robin Hood was said to hang out. The other place is in Yorkshire somewhere," I replied. Kit shrugged her shoulders and made to walk towards the heart of the forest. I grinned and stood in front of her.
"None shall pass!" I said in my most commanding voice.
"What?" she asked, feigning a look of surprise. I suppressed a giggle.
"None shall pass!"
"I have no quarrel with you, good sir knight, but I must pass this bridge," she said, carrying on the quote.
"Then you shall DIE!"
"I command you as King of the Britons to stand aside!"
"I move for no man!"
"So be it!" Kit and I started a mock swordfight using fallen twigs, playing out the rest of the scene from Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Kels just rolled her eyes and stood at the edge of the scene with her arms folded.
"If you're quite finished?" she asked with one eyebrow raised as I screamed and called Kit a yellow bastard.
"Yeah. Sorry." I got up off the floor, dusted myself off and wrapped my arms around Kelby's neck as we walked off.
"Oi! Gerroff me!" she yelled and tried to push me off.
"'Ello. You're pretty," I said in my scariest monster voice. Kels shrieked and tried to push me away but I just held on tighter to her. The end result was that we both went sprawling in the dust.
"Children," snorted Kit as she walked past, a woman who not so long ago had been sword fighting with sticks.
We had a grand time, playing in the fields. We acted out more of Monty Python and the Holy Grail and then did some Lord of the Rings, then a couple of wrestling bouts and Robin Hood, and rounded it off with Romeo and Juliet for the 21st Century. Our hangovers were well forgotten by now and the only thing that would have made the day perfect was if there had been an ice cream truck in the middle of the woods.
We played in the forest until the sun began to set and decided to head back to the hotel. All of a sudden a great weariness overtook me and I couldn't stop yawning. I attributed it to the alcohol I'd had at the pub earlier; drinking in the daytime always made me sleepy.
"Which way back to the city?" asked Kels around a yawn.
"This way," said Kit confidently, also looking completely knackered. She led us back towards the south, judging by the setting sun, which would ordinarily have taken us out of the forest and back towards Nottingham. However within moments we were hopelessly lost.
"Where the hell are we?" I asked in frustration. I was so tired now I was finding it difficult to think.
"I don't know!" snapped Kit irritably, rubbing at her eyes with her fists.
"I don't want to spend the night in the forest," whimpered Kels. "There might be… wolves and things."
"Doubt it, they were probably all scared off centuries ago," I shrugged. I glared at the nearest oak tree. "Is it me or is the forest getting denser?"
"It shouldn't be, it should be thinning out; this is definitely the way back to town," said Kit.
"Well it's getting thicker," I pointed out, sounding harsher than I intended to.
"Well that's not my fault!" snapped Kit. She strode to a blasted oak, which seemed to be glowing white in the setting sun, that had a hollow in the trunk large enough to admit a couple of full grown men. "We'll just have to accept that we're lost. I vote we sleep here and find our way back in the morning."
"Sounds good to me," I said, dragging myself over to the oak and settling myself down in the hollow.
"If we must," conceded Kels, now looking far too tired to argue the point. We all settled down and made ourselves comfortable and within minutes were fast asleep.