A/N: I rewrote this chapter about 600 million times today. I know I've been slacking lately. I apologize. I've been busy with school and whatnot. And fatigue. Man, I haven't had a good night's sleep in forever. It's only 10:15 right now, maybe I'll try and get it tonight.

Anyway, I was really tired while working on this chapter, so if something seems... off, that's the problem. I'll reread it tomorrow and fix anything that needs fixing.

I was quite proud of myself yesterday because I joined a LiveJournal community for the first time all on my own. And, of course, it's an SVU community. -happyface-

Anyway, this isn't quite THE chapter you've been waiting for, but I'm hoping it's better than the last one. I know that one was pretty bad.

Okay, I'm leaving. This new "Doublemint Twins" commercial came on... and it's scaring me. Which means it's probably time for me to go. Happy reading!

Disclaimer: I'm still working on it, but still no luck.

Olivia lay on the couch, staring at the ceiling. She was thinking about Elliot, the one person she'd hadn't thought much of lately.

Months had passed since she wrote him the letter. She never heard back from him, which confused her. She knew Elliot tended to keep things bottled up, but at least he could have given some assurance that he'd received the letter.

Her eyes drifted to her stomach. It had grown plenty, and it was just a matter of days before she'd be the mother of a beautiful baby boy or girl. She was excited, but at the same time feeling nervous and guilty.

The guilt came during the rare times when she'd think of Elliot. He was this child's father. The only time that he'd spent with Baby Benson was the last day Olivia saw him. Now here she was, months later, ready to give birth and become a single mother. Although she knew that Elliot should have made some sort of attempt to be with his child, she knew that she could also make the attempt to patch things up between them.

We're just too damn stubborn, she thought.

She sat up on the couch, opting to call Casey. They hadn't talked much lately, and Olivia was beginning to feel bad for it. She reached for her phone on the coffee table, pressing Casey's number on the speed dial.

"Novak," Casey answered.

"Hey, it's me," Olivia replied.

"Olivia! Hi, how are you?"

"Excited... nervous... you know."

"Yea, I know. How long?"

"Any day now."

"Wow. Time really flies."

"It does." Olivia paused. "Hey Casey?"

"Hmm?"

"How's Elliot doing? I never heard back from him after that letter. And I have a feeling that when I have this baby, he..." she trailed off, her voice suddenly choking up.

"Liv, what's wrong?"

"I just- I feel like Elliot should be there with me, you know? I haven't heard from him in months, and he's the father of this child. It's like... when the baby's here, what's going to happen?"

There was a pause on the other end of the line. "He's scared."

"What do you mean?"

"He loves you, Liv."

Olivia took a deep breath in. That was the last thing she was expecting to hear.

"His divorce with Kathy was excruciating for him. And he's afraid that if he lets someone else in... like you... he's going to go through the same thing."

"Last time I checked he was furious with me. And now he loves me?"

"He was pretty angry. He actually might still be. You know him, he's one to hold a grudge."

Olivia nodded over the phone, not realizing her dazed state.

"I think he just needed an excuse," Casey went on.

"An excuse for what?"

"If he was angry with you, then he'd have no reason to love you. Because it's hard to love someone you're angry with."

Olivia was silent, letting Casey's words sink in. It's hard to love someone you're angry with.

"Are you there?" Casey said after a moment.

"Oh. Yes, I'm here. Just... thinking..."

"You know, Liv. They say that the ones you hurt the most are the ones you love the most. That's his deal. He was confused about his feelings, which is why he never responded to your letter."

"I was thinking about that earlier. We're too much alike. Neither of us is willing to take the first step. So we're just leaving is as it is and letting time work it out."

"Ha. That's so like you guys. You're right. You are too much alike."

"Yea. I, uh- oh, shit. Oh shit."

"What? Olivia, what's wrong?"

"Aaagh... Pains. Jesus, this can't be happening already. I thought I still had a few- aaagh."

"Oh my God. Liv, hang on. I'm going to call you an ambulance. And I'll be right over. I'll call you right after I call for the ambulance. Okay?"

The two hung up and Olivia managed to drag herself into the bedroom to gather a few things to take to the hospital.

----------

"Come on, Olivia. Just one more push!" A nurse said.

Olivia obeyed. At that moment she couldn't think about anything. She was bathed in sweat, squeezing Casey's hand.

She heard cries, and immediately felt her eyes watering.

"A girl," the nurse said, holding up the baby.

"Oh my God. She's beautiful," Casey whispered.

Olivia beamed, tears running down her cheeks. She looked over at the nurse, wrapping her beautiful baby girl in a pink blanket. "Can I hold her?"

"You sure can." The nurse carefully put the baby in Olivia's arms.

Casey looked over. "She's got your nose." She ran her hand over the small amount of dark hair. "And your hair."

Olivia looked at her baby, then to Casey. "Did you call Elliot?"

Casey nodded.

"Did he say he was coming?"

Silence.

"Casey?" Olivia urged.

"He told me that he wasn't sure if he was ready you see you yet..."

The tears that had formed in Olivia's eyes were now falling. The combination of happiness from the little newborn in her arms and sadness from the baby's father not being there were causing the tears.

"I don't believe it."

"He's an asshole." Casey quickly put her hand over her mouth, hoping the derogatory statement didn't somehow plant itself into the baby's mind.

Olivia looked down at the baby in her arms, ignoring Casey's words. "You're so beautiful," she whispered, running a hand over her soft cheek.

The baby opened her eyes briefly, and Olivia gasped a light and shaky gasp.

"What?" Casey wondered, seeing the look of fear in Olivia's eyes.

"She's got his eyes."

Casey was quiet. She then decided to change the subject. "So what's your baby girl's name?"

Olivia smiled a sad smile. "I was hoping Elliot would be here so we could decide together." She looked thoughtful. "But I made a list in my spare time." She looked back at her baby. "I decided on Mary Frances."

"Mary Frances Benson. What a beautiful name." She smiled down at Olivia. "I think I'll leave and let you get some rest. I'll be in the waiting room if you need anything."

"All right. Thank you, Casey."

"Anytime." Casey smiled and left.

Olivia held her child for awhile longer before the nurse had to take her away. She then closed her eyes fell asleep. A part of her heart had filled itself with happiness.

Another part was still empty.