Kyouyama Anna, raised to be an itako, a medium, by my grandmother. She was trained to be void of strong emotions, so that transitions and trances as she channels spirits are smooth, and becomes second nature.
My grandmother was extremely proud of her prodigy but was frightened at how she was too good at it. If one was completely void of any emotion, they lose the right of being human. They are no longer human. They are, she says, dead, even if their physical body continues to function, and are lost in their own consciousness; a fate worse than the damnation to Hell because they may never be saved. But on the otherhand, they'd never be indecisive because there are no doubts to tamper with. Decisions are based by logic.
Grandma said that the only way to stop the risk of losing Anna is to allow her to express feeling, emotion. But if she gets too caught up and attached, it'll be difficult to channel, so I had to be limiting. I had to be very careful with Anna. Grandma always exaggerated how important I am with Anna. You, you, you. Man, oh man.
"Yes, you," Grandma repeated to me. "You are the most important to her and yet, you are the only one who could destroy her emotionally. When you are in a rare state like hers, Yoh, only you exist, nobody else."
Grandmother knew firsthand because she, too, is an itako. Once she had explained this to me, everything seemed to make sense.
So I try.
At first, she was angry a lot. Anger's an emotion, right?I thought all I should do is get her angry to save her. It was so simple because I don't think I really liked her when I was younger and it was so easy. An eye for an eye, right? But as I got older, and more in love with her, I knew that that was wrong.
Wanna know something? Sometimes I'm proud of myself because I think I outlove her. But then, that can't be right. Because I'm the only person Anna sees, so one-hundred percent of her is devoted to me.
All this time I thought I was saving her life by making her angry. But I know now that that is unfair to her, to be saved by being upset. I've seen her cry. Once or twice. And it killed me, metaphorically speaking. Well,one timeI was already dead, which was why she cried. But the Shaman Tournament is over.
Now I know that what is saving her is happiness.
Yoh's door slid wide and interrupted his thoughts. He turned his head to face Anna's silhouette underneath the door. Yoh raised his eyebrows and sat up. "Something wrong?"
She studied him on his futon before she answered. "No... Just remember to put the seat back down in the bathroom. It's driving me crazy."
"As long as you remember to put it up when you're done," he grinned.
"No way."
"No deal."
"You're an ass."
"I love you, too."
She stood under his door frame and looked at him hard.
"Are you sure nothing's wrong?" he asked once more. Yoh pulled away his covers and readied himself to get up.
"No, it's okay. I just couldn't sleep." Anna paused. "I just forgot to say good night, that's all. I think that's what's bothering me."
Yoh sat there. "Anna, I-" he started.
"I just- No, nothing. It's just one of those nights. Good night, Yoh." Anna slid his door close.
"'Night, Anna," he said behind the door. Yoh laid back down as he heard her door slide open and close next door. "Kami-sama, please help Anna rest well."
Yoh went back to his thoughts. Every night he would stay awake a little later so he could reflect. Somebody had once told him that people had dreams because that was how the brain sorted out its thoughts. But Yoh rarely had dreams so he had to sort it out manually. Yoh wondered about a lot of things, so much that he surprised himself sometimes.
He made up his mind and got out of his futon. Yoh slid the door open and stepped out.
Yoh knocked on Anna's door. "I'm coming in," he said as he slid the door opened.
Anna was already lying under her blanket. She turned to faceYoh as he shut the door behind him.
"I'm sleeping with you tonight," he said.
Anna lifted up the sheets and welcomed him in without a word. He slipped in.
"Did I wake you up?" sheasked as she turned to face away from him. "I couldn't sleep."
"No, I couldn't sleep, either," he answered. "You're right. I couldn't do it."
"So we both lose the bet, right?" Anna asked. "I can't believe Horo was right."
"Who knew," he wrapped his arms around Anna and rest his chin on her shoulder. "I don't know what you were thinking when you agreed to his bet."
Anna socked Yoh in the stomach. "Shut up. I didn't know it'd be so hard."
"He doesn't have to know, though."
"I know that," she answered. "I hate losing."
Yoh was immediately asleep as he feltAnna's body rise and fall in a hypnotizing rythmn. There was a comfortable silence in the room. The moon casted longteasing shadows on the floor of their room andAnna was lulled to sleep by Yoh's warm breath.
A/N: Ooh, that was a little weird. But I really like this one-shot. Uh, just to make sure things were clear here, Horo had bet Anna and Yoh that they couldn't spend a night by themselves in their own room. They obviously lost. But who cares, right?