A/N: The next 5 chapters are dedicated to Jack_Starwin, who inspired me to continue his story. Thank you muchly! :D
Who Deserves Who?:
At the four words no romantic partner ever wants to hear, coupled with the tears in her husband's eyes, Padmè felt her heart drop down into the region of her stomach to take up residence with the twins.
But, being the strong woman she was, she pushed herself up into a sitting position, pulled him up too, then summoned a brave little smile and brushed off the tears from Anakin's cheeks as they fell. "Whatever it is we need to talk about, we'll get through it together" she said softly as she searched his water-filled blue eyes for a clue as to what was wrong. Why does he look guilty? Please don't let it be another Sand People type disaster. "We love each other way more than anything this wretched galaxy could throw at us. Promise."
Anakin sniffed back more tears and shook his head slowly before tipping forward and resting his head on her bare shoulder and wrapping his arms around her. "I don't deserve you," he mumbled into her skin as he trembled faintly.
Closing her eyes for a moment in fear, she leaned her cheek against his soft hair and stroked her fingers through the collar-length curls. The morning sun was bringing out the pure gold in the dark blond mane he was sporting now, making it look absolutely stunning. She'd spent hours last night with her hands in his hair as he loved her with mouth and fingers and body and had quickly come to the conclusion that she really liked it this length.
She still couldn't believe how much more he'd matured in the last five months. He certainly didn't look his real age of nearly twenty-two. The war had given him ancient shadows in his eyes long ago, but now his features were starting to age before his time as well. There were lines of stress and exhaustion on his face that shouldn't have appeared for decades yet, and a weary resignation in his eyes that only increased her determination to end this war as soon as she could.
Her young husband was beyond tired, and this breakdown only proved it.
"Of course you do," she whispered. "No one deserves to be happy more than you do. You've been through too much."
She felt him huff. "Understatement," he muttered.
She waited a little, expecting more words from him, but nothing emerged aside from a long, shuddering sigh as he relaxed against her. Eventually, she had to smile wryly to herself. As nice as this is… "Ani, I hate to rush you, but your children are dancing on my bladder and I need to get up very, very soon."
This galvanized him into instant action.
"Oh Force!" He was up, off the bed, and on his feet in less than a second. "I'm sorry!" he exclaimed as he came around to her side of the bed and scooped her up out from under the covers in an easy movement and then deposited her on her own feet in a fraction of the time it would have taken her to finagle her awkward self off the bed on her own. "Here, you good?"
She held onto his arms for a moment as she found her balance and gave him a beaming smile. "That's it, you're officially not allowed to ever leave and are hereby employed as my crane to help me get up off of various pieces of furniture until the children are born."
He gave her a pained smile. "I wish I could. You have no idea how much."
Padmè sighed softly and kissed his stubbly chin, then turned and looked for something to wear, feeling very naked and fat despite the fact that Anakin had literally worshiped her changed body to death last night. "I know. Unrealistic dreaming, but it is a nice one." She stepped over the heap of silvery blue silk that was the nightgown she'd worn to bed (and hadn't had on for very long before he pulled it off and tossed it half way across the room) and grabbed her comfortable plush robe from just inside her closet instead. As she made for the en suite refresher, she looked over her shoulder at Anakin, who was hovering behind her with a worried look on his face. He was still completely naked and very much worth looking at. "I'll be right back, and I'm fine, I don't actually need a crane, so stop fretting."
He blinked and flushed slightly at the realization that he'd been fully prepared to help her up off the toilet. "Right. Sorry."
Padmè laughed softly and closed the door in his face.
When she emerged some many minutes later, having taken care of all of her usual morning ablutions since she was in there anyway, Anakin was just walking back in the bedroom door carrying a breakfast tray and wearing his black pajama bottoms only. The sight of his strong arm and chest muscles made her wish she could jump on him the way she used to. She rubbed a hand over her belly. As much as I love you two, I can't wait for you to evacuate my body.
He smiled when he saw her; that cautious curving of lips that said he still couldn't quite believe that she was his. "Angel. I brought us breakfast. Threepio already had it ready."
"I see that," she smiled back and climbed back into bed, pulling the comforter over her legs and leaning against the headboard. Anakin copied her on the other side of the bed, balancing the tray with an easy grace that she envied. She picked up a slice of warm, already buttered toast and took a bite that should have been a delicate nibble, but really wasn't; she was starving. Or more accurately, the twins were. Her only consolation was that Anakin managed to consume a good quarter of his toast in one bite, so she didn't feel quite so much like an unrefined savage.
She finished her toast while he ate his and another besides in companionable silence. But once hers was gone and she'd picked up a bowl of yogurt filled with fresh berries and a spoon (which she waved at him) she said, "All right, talk. What had you so upset?"
Anakin stabbed at his own yogurt, stirring everything around listlessly. He glanced at her and that guilty look was back. Her yogurt didn't look quite so appealing anymore. "I had a dream," he muttered.
Oh. That's not so bad. Dreams, even if they're one of his ominous visions, definitely don't rank up with there with mindless murder.
"And?" she encouraged when he seemed to get stuck on just that.
"And it wasn't about you," he told his breakfast.
Padmè raised a single eyebrow. "So? I'm sure I can't be the only thought in your head."
Anakin flashed her a wry look. "You usually are, actually. Thinking about you keeps me sane and from doing many of the stupid things I'd like to do. Like yell at the Council or strangle a Hutt, just because."
"Oh." That was both incredibly flattering and very alarming. Maybe it's best not to think about that too much. "So what was your dream about then?"
He stabbed at his yogurt again and then put it back on the tray resting between them with a clang, uneaten. "I betrayed you. I had wild sex with Ahsoka, got her pregnant too, and created an unbreakable mating bond with her."
Padmè gawked at her cringing husband. Flat out gawked. And then she laughed. Long and hard while he stared at her with the most comical look of alarm on his face.
"Kark, did I break you?" he asked after a minute or so.
She shook her head, still snorting and giggling (and very grateful that she'd already used the facilities), but finally managed to control her mirth. "No." She swiped at a stray tear of laughter and then took a bite of her yogurt, much to his shock.
"Then why aren't you freaking out on me right now?!"
Padmè swallowed and waved her spoon at him again. "Because you, Anakin Skywalker, have been in love with Ahsoka for years. I'm just surprised it took you this long to realize it."
His jaw dropped and he looked like a landed fish for a few seconds. "What?! Why would you think that?!"
Padmè took another bite, making him wait a few seconds. "Because… I was the one who held you as you cried and raged when she left you. I was the one who saw you freak out when she was captured by Hondo. I was the one who kept you from pulling all of your hair out when she was captured by the Trandoshan hunters and you didn't know where she was for a week. I was the one who listened to you gush over every single one of her accomplishments. Anakin, I practically watched you fall in love with the girl with each passing day that you were together. If you hadn't fallen for me first, I have no doubt you would have defied the Order for her instead."
He stared at her, and she could almost literally see the thoughts whirling through his mind as he processed the truth. "I always thought I loved her like a sibling, like how I feel about Rex and Obi-Wan," he said quietly, bunching up the comforter in his hands over and over.
"Maybe that's how it started," she said gently, touching his arm. "But somewhere along the way it became more than that. I know you, Ani, and I know what you look like when you're in love with someone. I guarantee you've never looked at Obi-Wan and Rex the same way you look at Ahsoka and myself. For example, what was the first thing you wanted to talk about while we waited for a medic to look at your arm yesterday?"
Anakin automatically glanced down at where his golden mechanical arm met flesh and winced at the memory. (He'd been bleeding from some stunt or other while saving the Chancellor that he hadn't been very specific about, but she could imagine it must have been something bad to partially tear away from his skin like it had.) "Ahsoka," he mumbled. Then clearer, "The first thing I told you about was Ahsoka and how mature and grown up she is now and how I never even got to hug her before we were separated again."
"And what should have been the first thing you wanted to talk about?"
He winced again. "How awesome crash-landing half a dreadnaught was? Saving Palpatine? The epic space battle? Obi-Wan finally opening up to me and letting me see that he was Human too and not as perfect a Jedi as he pretends to be? Killing Dooku when I shouldn't have?"
She nearly laughed again at some of those options but the last two sobered her instantly. "Any of those would have made more sense than talking for half an hour about the ten minutes spent with someone you haven't seen in almost a year."
Anakin looked at her with woebegone puppy eyes. "I'm sorry. I'm failing you. And you're right. Like you always are. I guess I've always loved Ahsoka. How come you're not upset about it?"
Padmè took another bite before answering, savouring the explosion of sweet and sour on her tongue. "I was at the beginning, when I first figured out what was happening with your Padawan. But after a while, especially after spending so much time with her myself and growing to love her too, I realized that you needed her just as much as you needed me. I couldn't be there for you anywhere near as much as I wanted to be and I learned to take comfort in the fact that you had someone else to make you smile when I could not. There's nothing I've ever wanted more in this galaxy than to see you happy and carefree and she does that for you, even more than I do, I think, because you're so similar."
"Padmè," he breathed, shaking his head slowly. "You're amazing and I love you more than I ever have, I swear."
She smiled at him and patted his cheek. "And that's why I'm not worried. You have a huge heart that could love everyone on Coruscant if you wanted to; I fully believe you're capable of loving two people at once and making us both feel like the Empress of the Galaxy."
His blue eyes lit up. "Do you want to be? Because I'm sure I could make that happen right now if you wanted."
While she was fairly sure he was joking, she didn't doubt he'd try his best to do exactly that if she or Ahsoka asked. Giggling, she shook her head. "No. Stars no. Queen of one planet was more than enough for me. I'm perfectly happy exactly as I am; your wife, the mother of your children, and a Senator in a just and fair Republic that I will believe in and fight for for as long as I live."
Anakin inhaled slowly and then leaned over to kiss her like she was made of glass, holding the back of her head in his right hand carefully so the metal joints didn't tangle in her curls. Then he leaned his forehead against hers and whispered, "I definitely don't deserve you, my beautiful angel."
She huffed softly, kissed her precious Jedi Knight back three times harder than he had her, and then pushed him back. "Sure you do. Now eat your breakfast before I eat it for you."
Anakin grinned like a little boy. "Yes, Mom."
Padmè narrowed her eyes at him and shook her spoon at his resulting smirk. "I am NOT your mother."
"I know," he said, after vacuuming in the biggest possible spoonful of yogurt and berries, his eyes twinkling madly. "But you're about to be a mother, so that means I can call you a mom."
Padmè growled and stole a spoonful of his yogurt, since hers had somehow become empty over the course of their conversation.
"Hey!" he protested with a laugh, pulling his food further away from her.
Huge stomach or not, Padmè dove after it.