I am sorry for the long wait but I had to rewrite the part before I was satisfied with chapter two so it took some time to find my fotting. It is set directly after the first chapter.
Dumbledore walked into the dining hall hearing how the buzz from the many discussions and talks change. People started lowering their voice and whisper. While no one pointed he could feel and see how many stared at him. It made his nerves raise and it was like the admonitors was cutting into his skin even though he logically knew they weren't anymore tight than before. He did his best to pretend he didn't hear the whisper or saw the stares. Oh yes, the rumor hill was rolling and no doubt his meeting with Travers was the hottest topic around here. Given that they had marched in while he was teaching it was not hard to guess how people knew he just hoped no one knew about what had followed. The question was how much people knew about such matters. There was always surprisingly accurate about so called "secret events" even though he never knew where they got their information from.
A he walked to the teachers table it felt like the admonitors was burning into his wrist his deep fears was that someone saw. Especially given that everyone was staring at him all though many tried to hide it. He tried to still his fears. It took a lot to not just turn around and leave and go back to his office, take out his wand rip them off and then pack his thing. Yet he had to act normal, or people would speak and look at him even more after all his job as teacher was on the line. He couldn't bear the thought never to teach again he loved it so much. "Liar" he thought. Whether or not someone noticed the admonitors he was done for it. Traver had forbid him to teach in the subject, but he couldn't keep himself to clinging to the lie that he could continue teaching if no one noticed. It was his life; How could he possibly give it up?
Dumbledore sat down at his place at the teachers table and was relieved that neither of his two colleagues sitting next to him was present yet. As he sat down the staring, mumbling and whispers became a bit less notable and he sighted in relief at that. The admonitors seem to sit a bit less tight than before as he relaxed slightly. To avoid anyone seeing them he had shifted his shirt and taken one with good long sleeves, but it couldn't hide the admonitors completely because they were sitting so close to his hands. Desperate to avoid thinking on it he tried to concentrate on all the assignments he had to grade. "Liar" he thought yet again had no job and needed not grading anything any longer.
Suddenly McGonagall sat down next to him on his right which made his nerves rise slightly and the cuffs tightening yet again. While McGonagall was a private person like himself and normally would respect his privacy this would not be so in this matter. This time she would do her best to find out what had happened. While it did come from a place of concern for him, he really didn't want anyone to find out. He felt yet again a strong urge to go back and get his wand and make the cuffs being ripped off his wrist. He only gotten those accursed cuffs this afternoon and he already hated them.
Dumbledore looked to the table hoping to be able to avoid the conversation by starting to eat instead. As always, the table was overfloating with good dishes all though he didn't care for the food right now. He was about to reach out when a thought made him stop. If he stretched out for the food, he would risk someone noticing his admonitors. The thought sent a shiver down his spine and suddenly it felt like the admonitors literally burning and becoming even bigger than before. What could he do? Not eating would raise suspicion but taking a dish, plate, fork, knife or just raising your glass would heighten the risk of the admonitors being seen. He looked to the table again and took the dish closest to him trying to grab as low and close around the tray as possible to not raise his hands too much. How was he going to act like everything was normal like this?
Just then his other college Professor Fry sat down on his left and Dumbledore had to fight to not show his discomfort being surrounded to both sides. Luckily Fry immediately began discussing with his colleague to the left. Even so he did notice the suspicious look McGonagall gave him. Dumbledore again looked to his food trying to avoid conversation but how would he take a drink or a bite without raising his hands exposing his wrists. How was he going to do that?
"Albus are you alright? You seem very tense" McGonagall said.
"I am fine Minerva. I just have a lot on my mind" Dumbledore replied trying to give her a smile.
Given her look at him it was more of a grimace. There was no avoiding it. Either he talked with her, or he started eating and right now he really didn't want neither. Deciding for the later rather than the first he took his fork and knife and began to cut out whatever he had put on his dinnerplate. Right now, he wouldn't notice if he ate paper for all he cared. What he cared about was gaze from McGonagall he could fell on him as he cut out the food. He took a bite to his mouth unable to fantom what he was about to eat when he heard the sound he least of all wanted to hear. McGonagall gave a soft low gasp. It made him drop his fork, the food landed on his legs but he didn't case about that she had seen them. Panic flodded her. He had to make her stop talking or she would expose him to the whole table.
"Albus what is …" McGonagall began.
Please not here. PLEASE" Dumbledore begged in a very low voice but even so he could hear his own desperation in the words.
"Very well. If you don't want to do it here, why don't you go to your office and I see you there shortly. I'll cover for you and say you had a lot of work and had to return early" McGonagall said.
Dumbledore looked at his plate who he hadn't even finished a bite of his food but there was no meaning in trying to do so. He might as well get out of here before more people would notice.
"See you in my office" he mumbled brushing the food off him as he stood up and left the table but all the way out, he could feel people's stare being on him, he was done for it.
FB
Dumbledore was putting yet another book in his bag trying to make them all fit into it. How did muggles do this without magic? It wasn't possible. Even so after much pressure he managed to get it down and close the bag. As he walked over to the table, he wonder how he would move that. He supposed he had to use magic which he really didn't care for but that wasn't his biggest problem. Where would he go? Moving in with his brother was hardly a good solution. The house from their parents had been sold. None of them had wanted it. He supposed he would have to use his saving on a small room until he found some job, if anyone would hire him.
To try and distract himself he sat down and grabbed his pen to write his letter of resignation. He owned it to Dippet to explain the truth as to why he was leaving but he struggled forming the words. Even so he forced himself to slowly write what had happened and why he had to leave. There was no reason to try and hide it any longer. If McGonagall saw his admonitors it would only be a matter of time before everyone knew and then the letters from worried parents would be flotting Armando Dippet office not to mention Traver would be breathing down his neck to see his demand fulfilled
A knock on the door made him look up as walked out and opened it and found McGonagall stand outside with a plate. He knew he should be hungry, but it was like all thoughts of food had left him right now. Even so he appreciated the jester and supposed he might as well have a last meal while being on Hogwarts. Dumbledore stepped aside and let McGonagall enter.
As she walked in she saw how his office had been halfway emptied and a few bags was standing packed to their limits. She walked over to table and placed the place there she noticed the paper read the first line turning pale at that.
"Albus what is going on" McGonagall asked deeply worried.
"Just … just emptying the office. I am sure … Dippet want it back once he receives my letter" Dumbledore said quietly unable to meet her eyes.
McGonagall was clearly not happy with that answer. She took up her wand and pointed to the door and the lock clicked.
"You are not leaving before you have explained to me what is going on. First Traver barge in and then you have these … cuffs on and I find you writing a letter of resignation. What happened?" McGonagall asked sounding angry.
Dumbledore sighted he saw no reason to deny her the information it would be public soon enough, but he still struggled forming the words. To give himself time he walked over to the table, sat down and slowly began eating. She sat down opposite him waiting for an explanation. Her determined face told him nothing short of the truth would be good enough. She was very direct and efficient. It was one of the many reasons she was good at magic.
"After you left Travers started out by asking if I had read The Predictions of Tycho Dodonus which I have" Dumbledore began.
He took another mouthful trying not to show the slight shaking of his hands. 'Keep going' he told himself. McGonagal might have noticed it and allowed him time to collect himself.
"After that he told me that Creedence was in Paris" Dumbledore continued.
"But you already knew that didn't you?" McGonagall surmised.
Dumbledore took another bite but he really just wanted to return to packing his bags and get out of here rather than sitting explaining it. Even so he silently nodded.
"Did you send Newt again?" McGonagall asked.
That made him look up in surprise. How did she know that? McGonagall saw and gave him a small smile.
"I heard you when you told Newt about the thunderbird in Egypt. You knew he would free it and let it come back to Arizona. You hoped he could help the obscurial. All though I have no idea how you knew there was one in New York. Then you have always been good about such things. I alwayd did wonder how you managed to convince Dippet and the ministry to let him keep his wand" McGonagall said.
Dumbledore couldn't help but smile at his former student now colleague. She had always been quite perceptive and skilled. Even so he knew he had to continue the telling. He really didn't want to so he took another mouthful and chewed to prolong the continuation.
"It wasn't easy but giving him a job in the ministry where they could keep an eye on him and use his skills was the compromise. Anyway he accused me of ordering Newt to Paris and then …." Dumbledore said but he couldn't bear to finish it.
To form the words and tell what Traver had done. Let him see his old … love. See the man he was and still is in love with. After all those years, after all the things Grindelwald had done. He was still feeling affectionate for him. He pushed the last few pieces of the meal around the plate without consuming them. He took a deep breath trying to still himself before he said it out loud.
"Traver wanted me to fight Grindelwald. When he refused he got angry. He placed the admonitors cuff on me and forbade me from teaching Defense Against the Dark Art" Dumbledore said.
McGonagall stared at him unable to form the word. If it had not been so painful for him, he might have grinned at her utterly stunned face. Instead he rolled his sleeves back so she could see the admonitors properly. Wordlessly she reached out and let her fingers brush against the metal binders. Anger flashed her face.
"How dare he? Travers has no right to do this to you. He can't fire Hogwarts staff as he sees fit. He can't just place such admonitors on you as he please. This isn't a ministerial branch under him. This is a school, and he can't rule it at his pleasure. How dare he also use such old versions as these. He could have used a single bracelet instead of these old versions. He treats you like a common criminal despite having no proof of you doing anything wrong" McGonagall cried out in anger.
Dumbledore smiled sadly to her. He appreciated her speaking out for him, but she was wrong. Traver could and would have his way and he had more than enough right to do it. If she knew who he had been so hopelessly infatuated with as a young boy she would properly not think like that.
"Traver has more than enough right with the new security laws in place. He can remove people who is considered a threat to the public and he knows more than enough about me to be able to make a case against me" Dumbledore replied before he thought it all the way through.
The moment the words left his word he could have cursed himself (had it not required his wand to do so). The last thing he wanted was to tell her just how close he had been with Grindelwald. Even so he could see on her surprised face. He was really a fool sometimes. None of them said anything, not wanting to breach the silence with a question both of them really didn't want the answer to all though for different reasons.
"What does he have on you?" McGonagall asked in an almost low whisper.
"I knew Grindelwald in my youth. I knew him very well. We where …." Dumbledore replied unable to form the last word.
"Friends?" McGonagall asked quietly.
"Lovers" Dumbledore whispered turning his head back in the chair as he was unable to meet her eyes.
Despite this he could hear McGonagall as she sat down. He could picture her shocked face. He waited for her to say something. To condemn him for his bad taste and in men but instead she just sat there in silence. It felt like an eternity as neither of them said anything.
"How did Travers find that out?" McGonagall asked.
This made him turn his head back to her looking at her. He was a bit surprised that she didn't give him a hard time over the revelation.
"I never told how deep it ran but I told the ministry of my connection with Grindelwald years ago. I knew they would find out at some point with him raising towards power. I figured it was better to tell. I can easily imagen what Traver would do if he found out himself" Dumbledore explained.
McGonagall huffed annoyed at that. No one among the Hogwarts staff liked Travers. He was a very harsh and mean-spirited man who had it as a life mission to prosecute any and all Grindelwald supporters without even caring to see if there could be special circumstances in play. He was known and feared for arresting people on a whim. She shuttered at the thought if he had gone all the way and arrested Dumbledore. He had probably been right in his assumption that is how it had ended had he not told them, but she bitterly regretted the cost it had come with.
Even so he can't demand this. You have done nothing wrong. Giving you such a ban is not his decision to make" McGonagall insisted.
"What do you think will happen if I refuse to follow that ban?" Dumbledore asked softly.
McGonagall didn't reply, she knew full well what would follow. Either Amando Dippet would have to support a man the ministry saw as a suspect of supporting Grindelwald or Dumbledore would be arrested. All the while they all would be flooded with letters from worried parents who would take side in the conflict. Neither solution would be satisfactory.
"But you can't leave here. You belong here. Who would also cover for you?" McGonagall asked looking sad and worried.
"Whoever will be appointed. I am sure Dippet can find someone equally good as me" Dumbledore said.
McGonagall huffed yet again at that, and Dumbledore couldn't hold back a small smile at the sentiment. Even so silence fell anew between them before Dumbledore broke it.
"I better pack the last things and finishing my letter. You … You should go. You must have a lot of assignments to grade" Dumbledore said as he walked over and took a book he wanted to pack while looking at his already overpacked bag.
"No Dumbledore. I refuse to accept this even if you have given up. Go to Dippet and ask if he has another teaching job for you. All Travers forbid you was to teach in this subject. He didn't forbid you to stay at Hogwarts or to teach" McGonagall insisted.
"I appreciate you trying to make me stay but I doubt Traver will accept that as a compromise" Dumbledore dismissed.
"Then we will take it from there, but I refuse to stand aside and let Traver have his way with you. You have done nothing wrong" McGonagall said sharply.
Dumbledore was grateful McGonagall defending her but he almost winced at that. He was guilty, guilty in so many ways she could never fantom even so he wasn't ready to share that part never would be.
"Minerva it is done. There is not much more I can do" Dumbledore said as he started collecting the last few books.
"So that is. You will just let Traver win like that? I had never thought to see you run away from the problem. I'll tell you this Albus. The only thing for wrong and evil to win is for good to stand aside and let it run its cause. You of all people should know that. Especially given what you are teaching in. I'll better go because I am wasting my time speaking to a man who can't even see past his own nose because he can only focus on his own misery" McGonagall said sounding very angry.
Dumbledore stared surprised around. He hadn't expected this outburst and seeing her anger directed at him. It felt like cold water hitting him right in the face and he couldn't help but feel a bit ashamed. She wasn't wrong he was running away to avoid the problem, giving up without even trying. He owed it to her to at least try and find a solution rather than just toss in the towel.
"You're right Professor. I am sorry. I have been to caught up in my own problem. I will do as you suggest and then I will take it from there but please don't hold your breath. My chances aren't good" Dumbledore said looking at her.
McGonagall looked at him and nodded but her gaze was firm.
"See that you do" McGonagall just as firmly.
He stood up and took up his wand to point at the door but thought better of it looking up McGonagall.
"Would you be so kind? I would prefer not to" Dumbledore said.
McGonagall firm stand softened as she looked at him. Wordlessly she pointed at the door making the door spring open as he walked out of it.
A/N There you have it. I hope you enjoy it. Let me know what you think.