1Chapter 13: Love Quadrilateral
"Oh shit," Hermione muttered.
Draco shifted in his sleep and Hermione cast an anxious look at him. He was smiling slightly, looking cute and angelic and sexy all at the same time like he always did in his sleep. A bit of silvery-blond hair hung over his face, framing it perfectly. Hermione felt her uneasiness slipping away as she gazed at him, but then she remembered the circumstances that had brought her to this morning and she frowned once more. Carefully extricating herself from Draco's clutching arms Hermione ran softly into her room.
Ignoring the pile of presents at the foot of her bed, Hermione flopped down on the bed and covered her face. What was she going to do? She had just helped her boyfriend cheat on her with herself. Damn this multiple personality stuff was confusing. She cursed herself for being so foolish; as if life weren't complicated enough, now she was involved in a love triangle of which she was two of the members.
Then there was Draco. To think that he would cheat on her! And she had trusted him! This raised the whole question of whether or not he had been cheating on her, or would be likely to cheat on her in the future with someone who didn't happen to be her secret identity or alter-ego.
Something had to be done. One of them had to come clean. If Draco told her (as May) that he had slept with someone else then maybe she would continue things as she had been. If Draco didn't tell her that he had cheated on her then the only way of telling him that she knew would almost certainly reveal who she really was. And what if Draco tried to lie to her about it? Then what would she do?
The sanest thing, of course, would be to stop all the lying and admit that she was both Hermione and May. At least that would stop the confusion. But how does one tell someone they care about that their entire relationship was a lie?
Hermione was not having a very good Christmas.
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Draco woke up when a chill alerted him to the fact that he was naked and alone. Without May's body heat he must have gotten cold. As soon as Draco opened his eyes he realized something was off. For one thing he was lying completely nude in front of the fireplace in the common room with an empty flask a few feet away. For another thing May was no where to be seen.
Then the evening before came back to him. He had slept with Granger. Draco had cheated on May with Granger. Not only was he screwed, it seemed he was crazy to boot.
Why? He couldn't help asking himself. Why the hell would I blow everything for one drunken night with Granger? Why would I risk everything with May for one illicit shag that probably wasn't any good considering how drunk we were? What am I going to tell May?
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Hermione finally left her room an hour later, fully clothed and frowning. Draco was waiting for her, sitting morosely in the center of the couch staring at his clasped hands which he held limply in his lap.
"Um, Draco?" She said quietly.
"Granger," Draco's head sprang up and he stared at her in surprise. He looked slightly wild-eyed and upset. That at least was comforting.
A small part of Hermione cringed at being addressed by her last-name once more. She took a deep breath and continued anyway. "Malfoy, then," she muttered. Continuing more loudly she said: "We need to talk about what happened."
"No, I really don't think we should," Draco jumped up and started pacing around.
They were silent for a moment.
"I have a girlfriend!" Draco finally blurted. "You know that, right?"
Hermione nodded, more than you know, she thought.
"So you know that last night didn't—can't—mean anything?"
Hermione nodded again. Another moment of silence ensued.
"Will you tell her?" Hermione asked, startling Draco from his nervous pacing.
"Huh?"
"Your girlfriend," Hermione snapped. "Will you tell her that you slept with me?"
"Why do you care?"
Hermione didn't have a good answer for that. "I just do, all right?" She finally spat out. "So will you?"
"I don't know," Draco chewed on his lip nervously. "I know I should tell her, I know that I don't want to lie to her," he paused. "But I also don't want to lose her and who would stay after being cheated on?"
Hermione frowned. If you don't tell me then you will lose me, she thought angrily. "I just think you should tell her, ok? You never know what people's reactions might be."
Draco just shrugged.
Hermione started to make her way towards the portrait to leave this awkward situation behind. Turning back to face Draco when she reached the portrait, Hermione threw one last question back at Draco. "Do you love her?"
Draco seemed to struggle with himself for a moment. "I don't know. Maybe I do. Maybe I could."
"If there's even a chance that you do or could or someday will, you should be honest with her. You can't have a relationship with love in it based on a lie." And with that Hermione left Draco to think.
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Hermione didn't know whether to be excited that the break was over or depressed. True, she would have company other than Draco, but she would face telling Jule the story and the return of "May" would test Draco and Hermione's relationship. There was no question in her mind that she would tell Jule what had happened. She had to tell someone; the truth was eating her alive.
So when everyone finally did return to school and Jule made her way to the Head Common Room to greet Hermione, Hermione was in tears. The story tumbled from her lips in a rather disorganized way starting with, "Draco cheated on me!" and ending on, "Do you think he'll tell me that we slept together?"
Jule regarded Hermione in silence for a moment, taking in her friend's tear-streaked face and trembling lip, before bursting into uncontrollable laughter. Hermione's jaw dropped in horrified outrage.
"Can you gasp imagine," Jule was choking out. "Having gasp your boyfriend gasp cheat on gasp you with gasp you?" She dissolved into giggles once more. "It's just so ridiculous!"
Hermione opened her mouth to say something scathing but hesitated. It was ridiculous. Hermione smiled a little, then grinned, then burst into giggles herself. "I'm so STUPID!" She yelled, tears streaming down her cheeks even as she laughed. Then she was just crying again. Jule tried to comfort her, despite her own hysterical laughter, but Hermione just pushed her away.
"It is funny, I guess," Hermione said after she had recovered from her hysteria. "But it could also mean the end of my bloody relationship, fucked up as it may be. I've never been this close to someone. I've never really dated before. What should I do?"
"Well why the fuck are you asking me?" Jule exploded, past her own hysterical laughing now. "What in all the, granted limited, time that you've known me would suggest that I would know the answer? I don't date, I've never really dated. People don't want me; they want sex, so that's exactly what I give them. And I don't want them either. Sex, I understand sex, but actually caring about people, the way you so obviously care about Malfoy, what the fuck do I know about that?"
"I didn't mean—"
"Just shut up Hermione."
"I think I might love him."
There was a moment of tense silence. "Why are you telling me that," Jule eventually spat out.
"Who else can I tell?" Hermione whispered. "I can't tell Harry or Ron; hell, I barely ever talk to them anymore. And I definitely can't tell Draco."
"You're out of your fucking mind," Jule headed towards the door.
"Why are you getting so pissed off?" Hermione yelled, grabbing Jule's arm and pulling her back.
"Why am I so pissed off? Maybe because I'm just as crazy as you are, you idiot!" Jule yelled back, practically spitting into Hermione's face. Then she did something that Hermione had not been expecting. She grabbed Hermione by the back of her head and pulled her into a very heated kiss.
Hermione had to admit to herself that it wasn't a bad kiss. She hadn't expected it; hell she hadn't even imagined that it was a possibility. But the kiss was definitely not bad.
When Jule finally released Hermione she was so confused and flustered that all she could do was collapse onto her own bed and stare in shock at Jule.
"But, you're my friend. And you made out with Harry." She didn't know what she was saying, but it occurred to Hermione that words were leaving her mouth.
Jule stared at her levelly. "Ron too. And just about everyone else in this funny farm. And I am your friend, but—"
"What?"
"I like you Hermione." Jule was looking down. "I'm not just attracted to you, I mean, I am attracted to you, but that's not all. I actually care about what you say, and how you feel, and the fact that you seem to be falling in love with Malfoy. 'Cause, I think that I'm falling in love with you, and I've never felt that way about anybody, boy or girl."
For one of the few times in her life Hermione Granger was speechless. She had absolutely no idea how to handle this. To her knowledge no one had ever been in love with her before.
"Jule," she paused. "I don't know what to tell you. I've never thought of you that way. I've never really thought of any girl that way. Then again, I've never really thought of many men that way either. But even if I was gay, or bi, or anything, you're my friend, and we've gotten pretty close and now, I don't know, it seems like it would be like kissing Harry or Ron. I just don't know what to do."
"Don't worry Hermione," Jule spat. "You don't have to do anything." And with that she marched from the room, slamming the door behind her.
The love triangle was now a love quadrilateral.
Preview: "You're Hermione Granger. You're a smug know-it-all with one hand in the air and the other turning the pages of a book. You know everything and you love to show off how much you know. Sometimes you can be bossy and judgmental and superior, and sometimes you can be sweet and sensitive and understanding."
A/N: Don't hate me if you don't like this chapter, but a lot of shit is coming together and I just want to get it all out of the way. And I know it's short, but shit happens.