Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon
30. - - Business card
...oOo...
The coffee was already pretty much cold.
27-year old Usagi Tsukino was sitting quietly in a small booth in the newly opened restaurant owned by one of her best friends, Makoto. Makoto was a top cook, and when Usagi was younger she used to stuff herself on her food. Today, Usagi still loved eating Makoto's food, just with a little more grace and ability while eating.
First she treated herself with some delicious pancakes, filled with chocolate, and covered in cream and sprinkles. She always loved eating sweet, she never hid that fact. After finishing the pancakes she ordered for coffee.
Black, black coffee with only one drop of milk. She asked herself why she ordered it like that, she didn't usually drink it that way. But once, long ago, she knew a person who did. She remembered that person now, that man who was her whole universe for one long period of her life.
Not anymore, she thought and spinned the spon in the half empty cup. Mesmerzied, she followed with her eyes the circles presenting themselves in the cup and let her mind wonder off back to the past. She and Mamoru spent five wonderful years together. Full five years spent in laughter, - and fighting, in joy, - and sorrow, in happiness - and sadness, in love... - and in death.
And then it all fell apart. They both concluded that it just wasn't it anymore, it wasn't the same love they had at the beginning. Oh, they loved each other more than life, but that felt more like a certain routine of their life than a real breathing feeling in them.
And so it ended. Mamoru went to America, and Usagi decided to become a professional photographer, after finishing the colledge to become a journalist. She successfuly finished the course and she was working as one of the main photographers in the "Empire Tokyo" magazine. She had a successful life, she thought, putting one hand under her chin and looking out the window. Colledge, job, a small apartment in the center of the town.. One whole bunch of friends, and she knew what the future brings... She had it all.
And then two days ago one part of her life came back knocking on her door as a big letter from America, a part she wasn't sure she wanted, or needed back in her life.
The letter was from Mamoru saying that he's holding a party that would celebrate his promoting to the director status in one of the most known America hospitals. And he was asking her to come and celebrate that with him. He also sent a couple of pictures of himself with the letter and his business card with all the numbers she could reach him on. With nervousness in her heart she reached for her wallet and pulled out the card.
Should she call him?
She wasn't sure. They haven't heard for nearly three years and now he contacts her out of the blue, and she was partialy out because of it, and partialy she longed for that something he gave her before, that feeling. Feeling he could still give her. She knew Mamoru as the back of her hand and she also knew exactly what would happen if she was to go. But she wasn't sure - because she didn't know herself like she knew Mamoru - that she really wanted for anything to happen.
The turned the card several times in her hands and then with shaking fingers pushed it back into the wallet.
She won't go.
She can't.
There's so much between them.
Sighing she picked up her things and payed to one of the waiters, waving at Makoto while exiting the restaurant. There's too much of a past behind them, so many things said and things that went unsaid... Too much pain, and too many mistakes. Too much trauma and death.
Too much love, she concluded at the end and with tired steps went home.
...oOo...
In the years yet to come, every now and then Usagi checked her wallet for the small card, just to be sure it was there. But she never again pulled it out and asked herself...
What if?