Chapter 10

Chapter 10 already! I am really happy you've been liking the story so far. There is so much more to come, but for now enjoy this new chapter xoxo

Opening her eyes to the new world of maturity, Rose did not want to wake up. Only a week ago, eighteen felt so far away. The beginning of a new lifetime she did not know if she was ready for. No, Rose knew she wasn't ready for it. The change of only one number was representing a change so big she could barely comprehend it. All her old dresses had already been thrown out and replaced with long, over the ankle frocks. Her debutante ball was in five days, followed by six months of dances, cocktail parties and special events. Those events were only useful for one thing; finding a husband. Rose knew she was about to follow in her sister's footsteps. She could easily be walking down the aisle herself in less than a year from now. The thought alone made her feel sick to her stomach.

Looking over to her right, Wendy was still flat out on top of the bedsheets. Their shenanigans from the previous night were thus scandalous that one mention of it could end their prosperous futures. It was an annual event for the two friends to spend the night together before one of their birthdays. It was eleven o'clock and the girls had just finished dinner and stumbled up the stairs. Closing the door behind her, Rose opened her window to smoke her usual cigarette. She looked down at the street and a carriage drove by.

"Only one hour left of freedom." She groaned and blew out her smoke, "Isn't it ironic that I often feel as if I have already lived my whole life, yet tomorrow is the start of something even bigger. I am not ready for it, Wendy. I am not ready to be like my sister and mother."

Heading up to her, Wendy placed a kiss on Rose's cheek and laid her head on her shoulder. "You'll never be like them, Rose." She said softly, "No matter how hard you try, you'll never be like them."

"I hope you mean that as a compliment." After a second of silence, the girls both burst out in laughter. The air of the night felt comfortably warm against their skin and they inhaled the soft scent of spring. Then it clicked within her; a marvellous idea to enter her new chapter of womanhood and end the last chapter of childhood. It had tickled within her for so long, but Rose never had the courage to actually do it. She wanted to dance until she'd feel lightheaded and her feet would give in. She wanted to roam around what she considered to be real people. She wanted to feel as if she was still truly alive.

Wendy's eyes widened and she felt her heart skip a beat when her friend spoke of the plan. Shaking her head she sat down onto the bed.

"Oh come on Wendy, it will be fun! They are all still downstairs, if we sneak out of the window here, they won't see or hear us."

"What if they come and check on us?"

"My parents never check on me when I go to bed."

Still not sure about Rose's foolishness, Wendy also knew that she couldn't let her go all by herself. Like maniacs the two climbed out of the window and descended down like thieves in the night. From the outside the chatter of Rose's family could still be heard and they rushed off as fast as they could. Then, a couple of streets further they stopped a cab to bring them to their destination.

As they stepped out, groups of various types of people crossed the street. Rose handed the driver his money and jumped out. Music could be heard from the outside, mixed with the laughter of strangers. Wendy took hold of Rose's arm like a scared child and followed her into the pub. It smelled like the perfect melange of alcohol, cigarettes and sweat and Rose smiled as wide as the Cheshire Cat. Everyone looked free and careless about all that was around them. The outside world did not seem to exist. Pulling her friend towards the bar, she ordered two pints of beer before leaning her back against the wooden stool and observed the room. Even children were dancing on top of tables. Suddenly a little girl rushed aside with an older woman chasing her.

"Isn't this exciting?" Rose spoke at the top of her lungs.

Wendy only nodded. "It's certainly a fun experience, Rose."

"I've been dreaming of a party like this for as long as I can remember. Look how happy everyone looks." She chucked half of her beer in one go and placed the glass back onto the bar, "I would really like to see my mother's face if she sees me like this."

Wendy shook her head, "I don't. I'd be fed to the wolves if my parents find out it." Then she pushed her sleeve up, exposing her golden watch with small emeralds. "But look, Rose. It is already ten past twelve. Happy birthday." Wendy threw her arms around Rose and kissed her cheek. It was a bitter sweet moment for the now grown up young lady. Despite her hatred for the change of events, she was happy she got to experience it somewhere else than inside of her golden cage. No one would ever take this moment away from her.

The rest that happened that night felt more like a blur. Pieces of a puzzle, filled with excitement and joy, that she found impossible to put together. About an hour after they had arrived and after a good amount of lager. A man tapped Rose on the shoulder. She turned around and locked eyes with a beautiful dark stranger. His exotic look triggered her curiosity and when he started to talk, she noticed a foreign accent.

"Correct me if I am wrong, but I believed to have heard that it is your birthday." He smiled.

Rose nodded her head. "It is, sir."

"And may I ask about your age? Or is it inappropriate to ask such a fine lady?"

"Eighteen." His smile turned brighter as his eyes scanned her body up and down. Searching for her friend in the crowd, she suddenly saw Wendy dancing with an older man. Her intoxication had pushed the girl over the edge of wildness and she was screaming and laughing as if she has never experienced true joy. Rose chuckled as she felt the lightness in her head starting to increase. The man, who later introduced himself as Mario, took her by her hands and twirled her around the room like a ballerina. Rose's feet moved to the rhythm of the music. Despite not knowing a single step, she just went with it. Mario had held her in his strong arms for the entire night, she could still recall that. And then, after what felt like seconds, he pulled her against him and started to kiss her as if he was a starving lion. Rose's body froze and she tried to push him away, but his body was too strong. She smashed her heel on top of his foot and released herself from is grip. Mario screamed out in pain. To her luck, she found Wendy on her way out of the pub and she dragged her along. Outside, the cold hit their skin and Rose burst out into a hysterical rage of laughter.

"Why does my dislike for men get confirmed every single day!" She yelled into the open sky.

To the girls it was a mystery on how they managed to climb back up the window with their drunken heads. Giggling, they fell onto the bed and were out within minutes. Now here they were, light peaking through Rose's curtains like flashes of barbarous pain. Rose groaned, lifted herself up and believed still to be intoxicated for the room was spinning. Looking at the time, it was only eight in the morning. Wendy's snores interrupted her many thoughts and she stumbled towards the bathroom, splashing her face with cold water. They were still in their evening dresses and the horrendous smell that was now trapped inside the fabric made her stomach turn.

Rose freed herself from her clothes and turned on the water of her bath. Her naked body waited in shivers for the water to get warm before she dipped inside. It didn't take long for a familiar face to pop her head around the corner. Repeating the same action, Wendy stripped down and submerged her body in to the lavender scented bath. She leaned her head inside her hands and shook it. "I can't believe we did that! I can't believe I danced with a married man. A married man, Rose!"

Despite her amusement, Rose put her finger in front of her mouth, begging for silence. No one could hear them. It was their secret.

"You seemed to have quite enjoyed yourself, dear."

"More than now." She moaned, "I feel like my head has been walked over by at least ten horses."

"Perhaps it feels like ten, but it looks like at least fifteen." Rose joked. Wendy gasped threw a sponge at her face.

All fun and games ended rather quickly. As seconds faded into minutes and minutes into hours, the aftermath could be felt ever so strongly. The exhaustion lingered inside them like haunting ghosts and Rose had to collect every bit of strength she had within herself to come across as the presentable birthday girl/The house overflowed itself with in and outgoing friends and family who all wished her the same prosperity for the new year. Of course, because of her name, people were far from original to give her any other type of flower. The drawing room was filled with red roses.

"You seem rather pale, miss Jones. Are you all right?" Jack said after having spent a while in their company. He looked down at Wendy and then back to Rose who was looking the other way. She felt as if she had been caught doing something unforgivable.

Wendy nodded her head and took a sip of her tea, "I am perfectly fine, Mr. Dawson. Thank you for your concern."

"You can stop pretending, ladies. Headache, dry mouth, nausea," He turned his attention back to Rose, "irritability and even a slight sensitivity to the light in the room. All symptoms that occur after a perfect night out."

Wendy's cheeks turned red with shame, "Oh please Mr. Dawson, do not tell my parents for they will kill me."

"Don't worry, Wendy." Rose reassured her friend and stood up from her seat, "Mr. Dawson won't give us away."

"And how are you so sure about that, miss?" Jack stepped towards her.

"Because I'd say we're more than even now, aren't we Mr. Dawson?" A small and amusing grin appeared on her face and Jack bit his lower lip. She was smart and still had not forgotten about his past interactions with a certain someone. He nodded his head only once and cleared his throat. "I see that miss Rose is the perfect candidate in judgement of my character, miss Jones, for she is entirely right. Your secret is safe with me." He winked at her.

Mouthing a silent thank you, Wendy leaned back and closed her eyes. In a way, Rose suddenly felt sorry for dragging her into her shameful desires. Her friend was the definition of purity and she sometimes took advantage of it. Although Wendy had also enjoyed their rebellious time together, Rose couldn't help but feel guilty.

The door opened behind them and everyone came storming inside. Ruth had invited Jack's whole family, but the person Rose desperately wanted to see was not there. Agatha had gone back to her own world of adventures. They all sat down, surrounding the birthday girl, enjoying their usual ways of small talk and a good cup of tea. In her body, Rose felt restless and she moved her eyes towards the clock. Only three in the afternoon.

"Again, miss Rose, happy birthday." He handed her a box, wrapped up in navy blue paper and a golden bow. To her surprise, the package felt rather heavy.

"I hope you didn't put a bomb in here, Mr. Dawson."

Not wanting to show his amusement, he quickly gazed down at his feet. "Just open it."

Like an impatient child, Rose snatched the paper off and threw on the ground, the ribbon followed soon after. As ever second passed it became more clear what was actually inside. Then she gasped and put her hand in front of her mouth. "Goodness gracious. Is it a.."

"Yes," he nodded his head, "the latest Kodak pocket camera."

She lifted the lid off the box and carefully took out the object. She had seen it many times before, but never held one in her hand. Had Jack taken her comment at the museum too seriously? "Mr. Dawson, this is really thoughtful of you. Thank you. Truly."

"You're welcome."

Violet popped up behind Jack and placed her hands on his shoulders and peaked over. She smiled in a strange way, a way her sister could not read. "Wow," she then said, "Now you can take pictures at our wedding, Rose."

"Yes." She mumbled.

"Can you take a picture of us now, Rose?"

Rose protested for a second. "I still don't know how it works, Violet."

"It can't be that hard, Rose." She grabbed the camera out of her hands and inspected it thoroughly. Annoyed, Rose stepped away and turned her attention back to her friend. Wendy was sitting up straight and tried her hardest to keep her eyes open. Rose handed her a biscuit, but she refused. His presence could be felt next to her once more and she felt a knot form in her stomach. Out of the blue, he held his hand out to Wendy. "I will bring you home, miss Jones." He helped her up. With glaze yet thankful eyes she stared at him. "Unfortunately, miss Jones isn't feeling that well," He announced to the company of the room, "I'll bring the car around and bring her home." Jack steadied her in his arms and walked her out of the room. Rose quickly moved behind them and waited with Violet until he had returned with his motor. Planting a kiss on the top of her head, she helped her inside. Alone she stood on the porch until they were out of sight. Violet had followed them too and leaned her back against the front door. Inspecting her sister's demeanour, she shook her head in disbelief. "I heard you last night." She stated, "Just know that it was the last time you behaved like that. Do you understand me?" Rose didn't respond, "Do you understand me?"

With a fast movement, Rose turned around. Her lips were thin and her eyes were burning with rage. "If you are going to insult me, Violet, I'd rather have you do it another time and not on my birthday."

Violet took a step closer. "You must count yourself lucky, sister, that I have cleared every obstacle in your way, because without me you wouldn't have survived in our world."

"Excuse me?"

"You know what I mean. You must really count yourself as the lucky one when every bachelor in the city will drop at your feet. It's only because I am engaged to Jack that you'll have plenty of options."

Rose scoffed, "Never in a million years do I wish to be like you, dear sister. In fact, I pity you. All your life you've been worried about what society thinks of you and to see that you now only start to value yourself based on whom you're going to marry is the most pathetic thing I've ever witnessed."

It happened too quickly to comprehend, but the sudden and sharp pain Rose felt on her cheek explained it all. She clenched her cheek and stared lifelessly at her sister who was trying to catch her breath. They shared not a single word no more. Violet only straightened her dress and walked back inside. In pain and defeat, Rose broke down onto the staircase of the porch and the tears rolled down her cheeks like a soft summer rain. Lighting up a cigarette she kept her gaze straight ahead of her. Emotions had turned her body cold and she shivered repeatedly. Then his car appeared from around the corner and stopped right in front of the house. She didn't move nor look up. Numb from the pain, she hoped he wouldn't see her.

"Why aren't you inside?" He asked her. Rose lifted her smoke up in the air and he also grabbed his packet out of his trousers. Confused, he inspected her facial expressions and saw the redness in her eyes. "Hey," he spoke to her in a soft and calming manner, "Miss Jones, will feel much better in the morning. You don't have to feel so guilty about it. It would have happened sooner or later."

Her silent tears quickly turned into heavy sobs. Jack kneeled down beside her and placed his hand on her knee. "Rose?" The mentioning of her name so soft and casually totally caught her off guard, "What on earth is going on?"

"This is what is going on. All of this!" Rose burst out, "Within hours my whole youth has been robbed away from me and now, more than ever, I am expected to be this delicate little flower of theirs, which I am not." She wiped her tears away, "Why can't I do the same that you have done, Mr. Dawson? Just head out for the horizon whenever I feel like it."

In a strange way, Jack could feel her pain more than ever. It felt as if he was looking at his own reflection. He didn't not like to admit it, but perhaps the two had more in common than they thought. Two lost souls floating around in a world that was not made for them. Jack pitied her. He could only listen and nod his head, showing her that he was actually paying attention to her inner struggles.

"I even forgot to thank you, Mr. Dawson. Not only for you help with Wendy, but for your discretion."

"You're welcome." He said softly.

"And the camera, Mr. Dawson. You should be giving your fiancee such lavish gifts and not the sister."

"I can make up my own mind about that, miss." He chuckled, "and have you seen that ring I proposed with? I could buy twenty cameras for the price of that thing."

Rose let out a deep sigh, releasing all of her inner stress and turmoil. Jack pulled out a handkerchief and handed it to her. As her fingers brushed slowly over his hand, he held his breath. "Will you teach me how to use it?" Rose asked and without a single thought he nodded his head, "Sure, if you'd like." Also she nodded her head. Both new they needed to rejoin their families, yet the calmness of the moment made them remain in the same spot. She passed his napkin back towards him. Jack took it and noticed she didn't let go. Their hands were stuck together, fingers intertwined like the moment they were dancing. Now they were simply two grown ups, enjoying the silence of the moment.