(Did I listen to Ed Sheeran's Thinking Out Lould while writing this chapter? Maybe ;^)

Here we are, the final part of the storm arch and let me tell you: this took longer than I expected, but it was worth it! So, now on to chapter 12, in which there is more rain and a Good Trope ™!

Chapter 12 - Thinking (Out Loud)

"Thought you'd never ask."

Hiccup looked at her and for the first time in his life, he was glad Bucket's prediction had been right.

Astrid's light smile was covering for her nervously palpatating heart when she felt his gaze practically burn on her skin and wished it was his mouth. He shifted slightly, his eyes losing focus and suddenly his name was spilling over her lips, easily rolling off her tongue.

He hummed, his fingers curling into the burly jumper she was wearing.

Her eyes were sparkling, and there was a small smile playing on her lips as she whispered into the space between them, "It's pretty late. We should probably go to bed."

"Yeah, we should," he echoed weakly, but didn't make any move.

"Your eyes keep falling shut," she whispered, a hand coming up to cup his face. The smile on her face widened when he closed his eyes and leaned into her touch, mumbling, "It's called extensive blinking."

"Sure." she chuckled and patted his cheek, making him open his eyes again and moved out of his embrace to gently push him towards the stair case leading up to the other rooms. Hiccup reluctantly complied and shuffled upstairs, but quickly perked up again and reached behind him, shooting her an easy grin as he intertwined their fingers, making her heart sing.

"Well, here we are," he said just as they had come to a halt in a dark hallway. "The first floor's just as boring as the ground floor, but what can you do."

Astrid chuckled and waited for him to grope his way through the darkness and turn on the lights.

"Well, you could decorate, but that's just a suggestion."

He scrunched his nose at her, making her laugh and grabbed her hand again to pull her into the dim-lit room.

"Another fun fact," he mumbled. "My light is at least five years old and has maybe 20 Watt."

"Probably the cosiest thing you own," she shot back, her smile the brightest thing to him in this room. He stopped for a second to take her in and get his head around the fact that Astrid Hofferson was standing in the middle of his bedroom on the old rug his father had forced him to take with him when he'd moved out.

Looking at her now, he was slowly beginning to realise he hadn't thought this far when he had asked her to stay the night.

It didn't feel strange per se, just a bit improbable still.

And yet, here they were, standing way too close together and his skin was tingling.

Quickly, to push that feeling down, he crossed the room and opened his wardrobe in search for something for Astrid to sleep in.

"Is a t-shirt alright with you?" he asked, his heart skipping a beat when she stepped next to him, humming lightly.

Their bodies were almost touching, the sparks between them dancing in the warm light of the room.

Hiccup shot her a quick grin, but quickly returned his attention back to his wardrobe. He found a freshly washed t-shirt and held it up, silently asking for her approval.

Astrid nodded quickly and it was only when he handed it to her, she noticed the slightly washed-out emblem of the fire department on it, similar to the one he'd worn only yesterday.

There had been Hiccup, drenched in soft sunlight, and she might have tried to memorise the patterns of the freckles on his cheek. Might.

"Astrid?"

She blinked, realising he'd asked her a question, snapping out of her short reverie of sunrise and tangled headphones.

"Sorry?"

"What bottoms do you want?" he repeated patiently, something curious in his eyes as he tilted his head.

"Uh - any shorts would be perfect."

Hiccup emerged again and handed her another article of clothing, somewhat proud.

"Here you go. Freshly washed - the shirt too, by the way."

She thanked him, suddenly very grateful for his 20 Watt lightbulb.

"So," he started, dragging the word as if he didn't want to speak the folliwing ones. "I'll, uh. Show you the bathroom and, um. Well."

Astrid furrowed her brows, not sure where his sudden nervousness was coming from.

Hiccup himself was sure he was burning up. God, he'd never been this red.

'This is stupid,' he thought. 'There isn't even a reason for you to be nervous. The flat is clean. You're not even spending the night with her. You're just showing her the bathroom and then you're going back downstairs. It's not a big deal.'

The raindrops were even louder up here right under the roof, somehow accentuating the silence as he was silently being aggressively decent, his father's words about intentions as present as ever. She was smiling almost curiously at him, so he shot her a quick grin and tried to convince himself he was absolutely one hundred percent fine with his decision.

Almost warily, she followed him back into the hallway and watched him push open the door of the room right next to his bathroom.

"Here's the bathroom, I'll put some towels out for you and a toothbrush. There's also a water bottle next to the bed and some tissues and a flashlight, just in case," he told her, gesticualting back towards his bedroom.

Astrid furrowed her brows, a suspicion forming quickly. It proved to be right when Hiccup shuffled from foot to foot and added, "So, I'll uh, see you tomorrow. Just call me if you need anything."

He smiled at her, then quickly bent down and kissed her cheek. "Good night."

Then he turned around and made his way towards the stairs.

Her fingers wrapped around his wrist. Hiccup stopped dead in his tracks, pulse sky-rocketing. Astrid was sure her heartbeat was so loud her heard.

"You're not," she heard herself say. "You're not staying?"

Hiccup hesitated, then took a step back from the door. Then another and another, until he stood facing her again. His voice was slightly raspy when he spoke.

"Do you want me to?"

Astrid found herself nod as she half-stepped away, her hands already pulling him further away from the staircade.

"I mean," she stopped and realised she'd taken both his hands. "I'd like you to."

Hiccup's throat was completely dry. "Well," he husked, letting her pull him in. "Then that's all I need."

'Ooh my God, what am I doing?' he thought and grasped the edge of the bathroom sink, gritting his teeth as he faced his reflection in the mirror. 'I can't just spend the night with her like it's no big deal. We haven't even kissed yet! And that's a big deal.'

He exhaled and pushed himself off of the sink.

'Ugh, who am I kidding, as if this isn't what I've been dreaming of for the past few weeks.'

He turned his attention back to his reflection, trying to find courage somewhere in it.

"Alright," he started, raising a finger at himself. "Pull yourself together, Haddock. It's nothing to be nervous about. Just sleeping. In the same bed. With Astrid. Who somehow agreed to being your girlfriend. But no pressure. Yeah. No pressure."

It didn't help at all that he could see his finger shaking, so he took it down, sighed and started brushing his teeth (while he tried to pretend that no, of course he wasn't doing a more thorough job than anytime before in his entire life except whenever he had a dentist appointment).

The knock at the door made him realise he had probably spent way more time in his bathroom than possibly appropriate.

"Hiccup? You okay?"

"Mmh-" he broke off, scared of accidentally swallowing his toothpaste, rinsed his mouth and choked out, "Yeah, just a minute!"

He turned back to the mirror, wiping at his lips. "Okay. Just sleeping. I can do sleep, right?" he mumbled. "I got this. Yeah. I got this. Only a healthy amount of eight hours of sleep. With Astrid. A few inches apart. Oh, god, who am I kidding, I can't - no. Okay. No, you know what, that's fine. This is fine. I can do this."

He stalked back to the door, knowing that those positive affirmations had never done a damn thing.

Astrid was smiling tentatively at him. Oh God, had she heard?

"I, uh, put some towels out for you on the counter," he mumbled.

"Thanks," she smiled and brushed past him, maybe a bit too painstakingly, her hands lingering on his arm as she did, leaving his skin tingling.

"Anytime," he returned weakly, not quite fighting the dopey smile stealing itself on his lips.

The door clicked shut and Hiccup quickly returned to the bedroom, almost stumbling over Toothless, who had obnoxiously blobbed down in front of his bed.

"What," he hissed into the darkness and furrowed his brow at the cat.

Toothless dug his claws into the wooden floor and stared back.

"Oh my god, Toothless."

The cat meowed and began licking his chest. Hiccup sighed.

"Okay, solid point. I'm giving you this one."

Toothless looked at him as if he was saying, 'I'd much rather be on the bed right now, but I'm doing this because I love you.'

"Appreciating it, bud," Hiccup grinned and crouched down to scratch the cat's ears.

"I'd better get dressed now, huh?" he murmured, glancing around the room and got up to quickly pull out something fresh to wear out of his wardrobe, not failing to notice he didn't take half as much time deciding as he had for Astrid's.

His quick, almost frantic movements were covering for his erratic heart, and he couldn't help but check his reflexion in the mirror, ruffling and flattening this hair, then ruffling it again, desperately trying to undo the damage, cursing under his breath.

"I really need a haircut," he mumbled more to himself than Toothless and brushed his fringe out of his eyes.

"I think it looks good on you."

Astrid's chipper voice made him jump and turn around.

She was walking through the door, quickly weaving her fingers through her blonde hair, dividing it into three sections and twisting it into a simple plait.

Hiccup almost forgot how to breathe.

Her smile was blinding as she sat down on the bed, tying her elastic around the end of the braid.

He'd never really worn the old shirt he'd given her, but 'Holy shit, this is the best item of clothing I fucking own now.'

"Um," he got out, as eloquent as ever in her presence. "I - thanks."

"If you want to, I could cut it for you, if you want to avoid weirdly specific small talk with a hairdresser," she offered lightly, propping herself on her hands as she looked up at him, a mischievous glint in her eyes.

"You - ah, you would?"

Astrid shrugged, almost nonchalant. "Sure, I used to cut my uncle's hair all the time. I just need a decent pair of scissors. We could do it tomorrow if you want."

Hiccup's mouth was completely dry.

"Uh - yeah, I'd like that."

Hiccup let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding and fisted his hands in his hair, letting himself fall on the bed next to her.

"I'm - sorry," he mumbled, not quite daring to look her in the eyes. "I'm just … nervous. I've, uh. I've never done this before. I mean, I - I've never … had a girlfriend, let alone have her stay over."

He breathed out a nervous chuckle.

Astrid hesitated, holding her breath, but then reached out and carefully placed her hand on his on the bed.

"It's okay," she heard herself whisper into the darkness, watching him shift slightly. "I've never done this before, either."

He turned to look at her, honest surprise written over his face.

"You haven't?"

She shook her head.

"I never wanted to regret anything. And most people I ever got involved with weren't really acting like I wouldn't, you know?"

There was a silly, lopsided smile blossoming on his face and he leaned in. "Most?"

Astrid grinned, warmth spreading from her chest, and nudged his chest. "Most. About 90%."

His grin widened.

She snorted, pushing him away. "Don't be so smug about it."

Hiccup chuckled, stilling her hand on his chest. "Sorry," he whispered softly, still smiling at her.

Astrid shook her head slightly, her expression almost daring (he thought that perhaps, it was only a trick of the light).

"But I guess - it's only sleeping, huh?"

He caught her gaze, and for a brief moment he was sure she'd heard him talk earlier. She offered him a small smile, which he returned and mumbled, "Yeah. Only sleeping."

He let out a nervous laugh. "I mean, it's not like we - like we'd do anything else. Right?"

"Right," she echoed weakly and bit her tongue before she accidentally asked just what exactly he meant by 'anything else', maybe because she already had an idea of what it was.

There was thunder rolling in the distance.

"Do you think we should go to sleep?" she asked into the storm still raging outside. Hiccup nodded, not able to take his eyes off her face and the way the light painted soft shadows on her skin.

Almost reluctantly, he let go of her hand and watched her get up and pull the cover aside. He followed her movement, but stopped when he realised he was still able to walk, a bit stunned by that discovery, before he realised he'd forgone a crucial step in his night routine.

"My leg's still on," he commented, but let out a short laugh at her expression. "And I'm wondering why I'm still able to walk."

There was humour dancing in his eyes, but also something else, something deeper in that was both aching and afraid to be touched. Astrid hesitated, the question already hanging on her tongue as he sat down again, pulling his prosthetic leg over his other thigh.

"I'll just … uh," he mumbled clumsily as he fiddled with the hem of his trousers covering the carbon, biting his lip.

Astrid paused at his discomfort, not quite sure how to react. A few moments later she inhaled slowly, crossed the short distance between them and sat down next to him.

"You're uncomfortable." It was more of a statement than a question, but he heard it. Hiccup sighed, raking a hand through his hair.

"I'm - I'm sorry, I just …" he broke off, avoiding her gaze. She watched him bite down on his lip, a frustrated snarl at the back of his throat. Her fingers grazed his and he exhaled slowly, eyes flitting down to their contact.

Finally, he met her eyes again and muttered, "It's ugly."

Astrid paused, her eyes wide, taken aback at his words. Then she gently curled her hand around his and whispered, "It's a scar. Let it be ugly."

He opened his mouth, maybe to object, maybe to repeat his earlier apology.

Astrid shook her head slightly.

"You don't have anything to apologise for, Hiccup. This is a part of you. And I -" she hesitated, biting down on her lip. "I adore every part of you."

There was the ghost of a smile on his lips now. She squeezed his hand and returned it. "I don't mind," she said softly, and repeated it, this time stronger. "Let it be ugly. I don't mind."

He nodded then, breathing out a small "Okay" and started rolling up his trousers' leg. His shaking hands were betraying him.

"Hiccup."

He stopped, her hands on his uninjured leg's knee. Her eyes were warm, full of adoration as she spoke.

"You don't have to show me. If you don't want to, just tell me. I'll just close my eyes. It's okay."

Finally he exhaled, the tension falling from his shoulders and he nodded wordlessly. Astrid understood and smiled at him, then turned around and crept under the cover, closing her eyes.

He did not know how to tell her how grateful he was, nor did he find his voice to tell her that he wanted to let her see this part of him, another day, another night.

Hiccup quickly pressed the pin, slid off the leg and rolled the liner and socks off, massaging his stump for a couple of seconds, before he scooted around the bed and laid down.

As soon as he hit the matress, another body weighing down the other side of it, his shame made way for a cold nervousness.

"You - uh, you can open your eyes now," he squawked, trying to lay as still as possible.

'Oh god, oh god, oh god.'

Astrid opened her eyes and smiled at him. His entire body was burning.

'Don't touch her, don'ttouchherdon'ttouchher,' rattled his brain.

"Good night," Astrid whispered into the darkness between them.

"Sleep well," he croaked and screwed his eyes shut.

'Just don't think about it. Actually, don't think at all. Don't think. Why am I still thinking? Fuck.'

He tried to concentrate on the raindrops hitting the roof. Or his breathing. Or her legs almost touching - no, not that.

'Oh, bother.'

He groaned inwardly and dragged his hands across his face.

"Hiccup?"

He flinched, biting back a startled yelp at her soft voice interrupting the faint storm.

Astrid turned around to face him, her arm tucked underneath her head as she looked at him, a bright smile playing on her lips.

"You know you can touch me, right?"

He could feel his heart skip a beat. Heat was rushing to his face.

"Um," he wheezed eloquently. Astrid was still smiling, inching closer to him (had his heart escaped from his ribs and fled into his throat?) and nodded slightly.

"I, uh - I didn't. Um," he stuttered, trying to explain that he didn't want to step out of line, make her uncomfortable, but it was almost impossible to form any coherent word through the mist in his head and his erratic heartbeat.

And yet, all he wanted to do right now was to wrap his arms around her and pull her close until not an inch was left between them.

Well, he could, couldn't he? She'd downright asked him to. Of course he could, but it could also go wrong on so many different levels. What if his foot were too cold and she would just be too polite to pull away? Would his stump weird her out? What if she got uncomfortable? Was she already uncomfortable-

"Hiccup."

Astrid was smiling again.

Hiccup almost couldn't believe it. Here he was, being an absolute dumbstruck prickand yet, she was still smiling at him.

"You're doing that thing again," she whispered how, raising a hand to gently push his hair out of his eyes, lightly tapping her fingertips on his temple. "I can almost hear you think."

Hiccup looked at her face illumimated by the stupid 20 watt lamp and thought, 'Don't spend all the time you spend with her in your head.'

He blinked.

"When I'm with you, I either think too much or not at all," he whispered then, and her smile widened, and whispered back, "Then don't think at all for now," and suddenly everything was easy and silent except for the storm, so he opened up his arms and slowly pulled her in, her head nestling into the crook of his neck and he could feel her grin into his chest as he, finally - finally - wrapped his arms around her.

He allowed himself to press a light kiss onto the crown of her head and inhale deeply before he husked into her hair, "Is this okay?"

Astrid nodded against his chest, her free arm coming around to lay across his torso.

"Better than okay," she whispered, smiling audibly, her breath hot through the fabric of the shirt. "You should stop thinking more often."

[blinking extensively]