Disclaimer: I own nothing
Author's Note: I'm back at school so updates are going to be a bit slower.
Chapter 24 – Setting the SceneHawkeye and Mustang stood in their embrace for what seemed like hours. Roy stood unmoving, simply a consoling statue that was a shoulder to cry on. Hawkeye's body shook with every sob. She hated herself for being so weak…for crying in front of him. She knew better, she should be able to hold these feelings in, she should be able to control herself. But tonight, it seemed as if all those years of uncried tears had finally caught up with her. She cried for Eli, for all those lost in Ishbal…even for the loss of her parents. But most of all, she cried for herself. She didn't love Eli, she knew that from the beginning, but he'd been the only person in her life that had ever openly told her that they loved her. Even her grandfather had been too stiff to say those words to her. Until Eli, the idea that someone could love her had seemed like some fairytale in a book. When Eli had told her how he felt, even if she didn't feel it back, it made her feel…special, like she was worthy of someone's affection. He had betrayed her though…had he ever really meant those words at all? Her heart hurt too much to try and analyze it all.
Her tears finally stopped. It seemed that there were no more tears to cry, but somehow she just couldn't stop. She was no longer crying, but moaning. It was just a quiet moan, but it made her feel better to release all that sadness into Mustang's soft shirt. The fabric of his shirt muffled her moans a little, but he could still hear them; ringing out like a lost dog howling at the moon. With every sob, a little of his heart broke. He wanted more than anything to fix it. He wanted to make this whole mess go away. He just wanted her to never feel this way again. He'd built her a new body, he fixed what the Red had broken, but he couldn't fix her heart.
When finally the emotions ebbed Hawkeye pulled away to look her companion in the face. "What will we do with them?" she asked, meaning the bodies of the Red.
Roy looked around them. The bodies of the men lay scattered around the room drenched in their own blood. Eli's body lay just a few feet from where they stood. Nervously, Roy replied, "Leave that to me. Go outside and wait for me." Riza wasn't sure what he was planning to do but like a good little soldier she obeyed.
He watched her leave the room and when he felt like she was gone he went about setting up the scene. He picked up the gun from where Hawkeye had dropped it and carefully wiped it off. Gently he picked up Eli's chilly hand and wrapped his stiff fingers around the handle, his finger on the trigger. Touching the man's body made his skin crawl, but he could do this, he could endure for her. The bloody knife that Eli had used to stab Flynn with was still tightly clenched in his hand. After taking a quick look around the room the scene would be apparent to anyone that walked in the room. It would look like Eli, in his despair had murdered all the men, and finally took his own life. That had been what happened…mostly. Besides, even if Mustang told the authorities what happened, who would believe him?
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The two slipped back to Mustang's apartment roughly around 1:00 that morning. Exhaustion was waiting just at the edge of their minds, waiting to attack. "I'll take the couch." Riza stated making her way to the sofa. Roy stopped her. "No, I'll take the couch. You can sleep in my bed."
"Are you sure?" Riza asked, staring up into Mustang's tired face. He nodded and gestured her toward his bedroom door. She glanced uneasily at him once more before heading to his bed. As she disappeared into the darkness of his room he grabbed a blanket from behind the sofa and settled down for the night.
In Roy's room Riza removed her black clothes and put his dress shirt back on. The thin cotton felt like heaven against her hot skin and she slipped between the cool sheets of Mustang's bed. She laid among the pillows and blankets and breathed in his smoky scent. It was allover the sheets and pillows and it enveloped her senses completely. Laying in his bed felt so forbidden, but instead of feeling guilty she felt a little excited. The excitement dropped as she thought of how many women had probably laid in this very bed feeling the same way that she did…waiting for Roy to walk in and sweep them off their feet.
Her thoughts drifted to Roy laying on the couch, was he sleeping? Was he thinking of her? Was he dreaming of her? Her heart wished he was, but her head knew he wasn't. She wondered what it would be like to live here. What was she going to do for the rest of her life? Could she really live here; sleeping in his bed every night, eating his food everyday, playing house to a man that didn't love her, knowing that she would never be allowed to leave these walls? The thought frightened her. She couldn't stay here, not forever. She loved Roy, but she couldn't spend the rest of her life living with someone that didn't love her. He cared about her, that she knew for sure, but in her heart of hearts she knew that he didn't love her. He didn't know what love was, how could he possibly love her?
She wouldn't stay here; she'd go back home to the west if she had to. Maybe head north if she couldn't find a place back home, but she wouldn't stay with him. There just wasn't a way. She was dead in Central and there was no going back.
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Around 4:00 in the morning Roy lifted himself groggily off the couch and made his way to the bathroom. Sleep filled his eyes and he didn't bother to open them. Without fully waking up, he went to the bathroom, washed his hands and went to bed. To his bed.
--
Riza was warm…really warm. Light filtered into the room and glared against her closed eyelids. She forced her eyes open and tried to coax her self into consciousness. 'Why am I so hot?' She thought to herself. She tried to roll over but something was stopping her. It was wrapped around her waist. Probably the sheets…only the sheets weren't wrapped around her waist…two arms were!
Riza's eyes widened and she quickly turned her head to look behind her. Sure enough was Roy, his arms wrapped around her waist and his head nestled softly against the nap of her neck. Adrenaline surged through her body and one thought entered her mind 'Get away.' She tried to pull away from his embrace, but the more she struggled the tighter he held. Her heart pounded in her chest and she felt panicked. What was she going to do? She couldn't just lay here! It would be—improper! But what could she do? He wouldn't let go and he was a good deal stronger than she was. After struggling a bit more she finally gave in. It was strange, just last night she'd gave into fantasies of him coming to lie next to her and now that he had she was too terrified of what'd happened that she couldn't enjoy it.
The button up shirt that she was wearing was pushed up and his bare arms were touching her bare skin. Despite his warmth, it gave her chills. Adrenaline rushed up and down her legs as she laid in his embrace. 'Should I wake him?' she wondered looking over her shoulder at his sleeping face. As she watched him rhythmically breathe she couldn't bring herself to do it. He looked so peaceful, so tired, she just couldn't. A few minutes pass and she felt herself relax in his arms and soon she fell back asleep.
When she awoke again he was still sleeping next to her his arms wrapped around her. Somehow in her sleep they'd changed positions and now she was facing him. His breath was warm on her cheek and his legs were intertwined with hers. The clock on the wall behind him read 10:13. It was past time to get up. Swallowing nervously, Riza gently shook Roy's shoulder. "Mustang. Mustang." She whispered.
Roy's sleeping form sighed and said, "Five more minutes beautiful."
She blushed slightly at hearing him call her beautiful. She shook his shoulder again. As she did so the memory from just a week ago sprang to her thoughts. She smiled slightly at the image of Roy falling heels over head off the side of the bed and onto the floor.
Roy's eyes fluttered lazily open. Riza could see a wide smile on his face as he opened his eyes to see her. "Morning." He said. It was nice to see her face. Over the past week he'd been so accustomed to seeing her there when he opened his eyes, it was no surprise to see her there again…there was something different this time, she wasn't just float next to him, she was lying next to him—in his arms.
The realization hit him and his brain tried to remember how he got there. Through a slight fog of memories, he slightly remembered going to the bathroom. His eyes widened and he pulled away. "Sorry." He said as he sat up. "I guess I forgot where I was sleeping last night and came back in here."
She didn't say anything. A little part of him wished that she'd say it was all right and pull him back to the bed. He looked back at her, only to find her sitting off the side of the bed putting the black pants on from last night, more or less ignoring his statement.
Hawkeye wordlessly swallowed his explanation. Part of her had actually wanted him to have come to her intentionally…not just because he forgot where he was sleeping. Without looking at him, she picked up the black shirt from yesterday and went to the bathroom to finish getting dressed. As the door to the bathroom closed, Mustang couldn't have helped feeling like he'd lost something. His arms ached for her warmth. He pushed the feeling down and pulled some of his clothes out of the closet and got dressed.