Jenny wiped the tears from her face. She didn't know how long she'd leaned against the back of the door. She walked over to the large fourposter bed in the huge top floor bedroom. No wonder he'd dropped her bag here. It was the farthest away from Steve. She put her hand on her back pocket and the sinking feeling of dread hit her. Her phone. Her phone was on the nightstand, still plugged in at Sarah and Sam's house. She sank onto the covers, her heart hammering. She had to call a cab, call Nicole, call someone so she could go home.

Maybe her laptop… She pulled it out of her bag and opened it, but the screen remained dark. And her power cable was next to her phone in Louisiana. She fell backward onto the bed taking deep breaths. At some point, she would have to go back downstairs and ask Bucky to use his, but she still felt so foolish. She couldn't face him yet. She got up and looked around at the room. The light from the window cast it dark blue from the shady side of the building and the navy curtains. It looked like it should be cold, but it was warm from the Summer heat rising. There was a large fireplace with a mantle and a deep leather chair. Her stomach growled and she pulled out a protein bar from her bag and chewed it, trying to quell the one ache she could control.

How could she have been so stupid? And how could she have yelled at someone who had saved the world multiple times? Her audacity astounded her. She was a stone-cold bitch who didn't seem to care about anyone but herself. She hung her head, rubbing her neck, holding her heart.

She thought of that tender moment when Bucky caressed Steve's face. That moment was meant for the two of them alone. She was the intruder,

Her eyes pricked with tears again. Bucky hadn't asked her to go with him. And what had she promised him when she'd begged? To be in his world, to accept what he had to do and stand with him. Then she'd abandoned him, just like Steve had. Just like Daniel had to her. Bucky didn't owe her anything, and she was acting like he had planned this in order to hurt her. This was complicated, and she wasn't allowing him to grieve the only person he had left after one hundred years.

She took a few deep breaths and stood. It hurt everywhere, ripping her heart out, but she had to allow him release her. Jenny straightened her shoulders and walked to the door throwing it open and jumped. Bucky stood in the hallway, his hand raised to knock on the wood. His eyes were red and his bottom lip quivered. Her heart went out immediately, dreading the worst for him.

He started. "I'm…"

"Me too."

"Oh Jenny." He reached for her hand, yanking her into his arms hugging her to him. Their cheeks pressed together hard, and her heart hammered against his. He pulled her tighter and tighter locking her in his embrace. For some reason, peace flowed over her, the calm of being on this side of a fight. He needed her, and she would be what he needed. She nuzzled against his jaw and he leaned into her, her hands gliding along the softness of his tee shirt.

"Is he?" she asked.

"He's resting."

"I'm so sorry. It's ok. I'm here."

"I should have warned you what you were walking into."

"You tried. I didn't want to listen."

"It's complicated. Unusual and complicated. I didn't mean…"

She pushed her fingers through his hair sinking them deep into his locks, caressing his scalp with her nails. He shivered and rested his head on her shoulder.

"It is," she said. "But I'm here."

"I'm glad you're here."

"I'm so sorry for everything," she said, the words tumbling out. "For being awful to you. For Steve being ill, for yelling at the person you love the most. For pushing myself into this sanctum. I know you love only him." She stroked over his cheek, his neck, over his metal shoulder with her hand. His skin was so hot. Under the neckline of his shirt at the nape, down over his chest and around his back. She took his face in her hands, looked him in the eyes and took a deep breath. "Bucky. I'm sorry for so many things, but I'm not sorry for falling for you. I'm in love with you. So deeply in love with you." His mouth parted to speak but she ran her thumb over his bottom lip. "Sh. Let me finish. I've loved you since almost the beginning and it scared the hell out of me. I've always been too much for people. I know I push you away. I've hurt you and cursed you while I ran from the truth. But I can't keep it inside any longer, it's burning me up. I love you so much it overwhelms me. But I don't expect anything. I don't require anything from you I promise. If you want me to go away I'll leave right now. But I want to be in your world, even if it's just this."

Bucky's mouth hung open, his hands cupping her face back, a blaze of hunger lit in his eyes. "I don't want just this," he whispered. "The moment I saw you in Stuart's office I knew I'd never stop wanting you."

"Please don't tell me this just to spare me. Please," she said closing her eyes. She couldn't take another false promise, it would break her.

"Look at me," he said.

She opened her eyes and started to cry at the intensity in his. Energy exuded from his body, and she could feel it on her skin. His jaw clenched, and he inhaled through his nose.

"I love you Jenny. I can't breathe, I love you so much. I can't think when I smell your perfume. I can't sleep thinking about the pain in your eyes. I want to spend my life protecting you. You fight for what's right and you don't take anyone's bullshit. You chase away my nightmares. I love him but I love you too. I love you god damn it. I love y-."

She threw her arms around his neck. "Bucky, I love you," she said.

He kicked the door closed behind him and their lips crushed together. Her breath stole away, and she kissed him back hard, her heart exploding. He held her so tightly to him she could hardly breathe. His face was warm and rough. Her arms were around his neck, his head.

His flesh and metal hands moved up and down her back igniting the coiled wick in her abdomen. His fingers grazed her skin as he tugged at her shirt and she gasped.

She pulled her mouth away from his and put her hand over his lips. "When you said before… Before we do this," she panted. "You said you wanted courtship."

"That's still on the table," he said, his fingers caressing her cheeks, her lips. "But I want you now, six ways from Sunday."

She answered by smashing her mouth against his again. They fit together like puzzle pieces. He sank his fingers into her back pockets grabbing her rear. The fire flamed and spread through her limbs, and she slid her leg up and around as he gripped her thigh pulling her heat closer to his. He lifted her into his arms and she wrapped her body around him kissing his cheeks, the creases at his eyes, his temples.

He pressed her back against the wall, his head in the crook of her neck. His breath was hot and erratic and she moaned as he tasted her skin. Desperate for no barriers between them, she pulled at the hem of his shirt. He set her feet on the ground she pulled it over his head leaving his torso exposed. She burned with want at the sight of him. He was so perfect. She slid her hands over his smooth but beaten skin, scars marring places she wanted to touch and heal. Placing wet kisses down his chest, she felt the groan in his ribcage under her lips as his head went back, his fingers in her hair. He tasted of salt and smelled like sugar and oak whiskey. His muscles clenched as she ran over them with her nails. She trailed her lips back up to his neck and found a spot at his shoulder where he sucked in a breath at her touch. She bit, grazing her teeth against it and he gripped her harder with a sharp gasp. He brought her lips back to his to kiss her wildly again.

"How can you be too much for me," he said against her mouth, "when I can't get enough of you?"

She groaned, the words filling her chest, pulling her closer to him. "No matter what you do or don't do, you're more than enough. You fit with me."

She felt his tear on her cheek, and she kissed it away on his.

He slid his hands down her chest over her breasts encased in the button down she had on and a moan left her throat. "How much do you like this shirt?" he asked.

"Not enough," she replied desperately.

Taking either side in his hands he ripped through it, buttons popping and flying across the room. She let the ruined garment slide off her arms onto the floor. Impatiently, he pushed the straps of her bra down and finally broke the clasp in the front with a whir of gears inside his arm, pulling it off her body.

"Oh god," he said, staring at her bare chest. "You're beautiful." He put his hands on her breasts and took her nipple in his mouth with a firm suck. She threw her head back, hitting the wall, holding his head to her as he focused all of his attention on making her squirm under his velvet tongue. She gasped as he trailed kisses to the other side.

"More," she begged. "More please."

He kissed her and his fingers traced over her skin above her jeans. Her abdomen clenched under his touch. He undid the button and pulled her zipper down slowly as he held her gaze. Finally after what seemed ages, he pushed the waist band and her panties over her hips so they slipped to the floor. She kicked them off and he stepped back. It had been so long since someone stared at her this way. She loved this, she absolutely loved this. She had no desire to cover herself; she just wanted to be enjoyed and looked at and loved. The way he drank her in was overwhelming. His eyes roved over every part of her body, pausing in places, biting his lip, his hand over his chest. He swallowed hard and lifted her into his arms. "I want to taste you 'till you shake," he said, his voice husky, his breath on her neck. "Until you can't say anything but my name."

Her eyes closed and lips parted. Heat went straight between her thighs, the shock of what he was about to do sending waves of elation through her limbs. Hoisting her higher, weightless like a cloud in his hands, he set her on the mantle above the fireplace. He spread her thighs and dragged his fingers down her legs. Starting at her knee, he kissed along her inner thigh swirling his tongue, and she couldn't breathe. Her thoughts became incoherent. No one had ever done this to her before, not even… she couldn't even remember. Every boyfriend, fiancé and lover evaporated like smoke from her mind except for him. The man between her legs, as desperate for her as she was for him. Finally he reached her damp heat and parted her center.

"Bucky…" she said inhaling, her fingers pushing through his locks.

He put her legs over his shoulders locking them in his arms and gave her a deep look, intimate, searching. Then he was tasting her, licking, sucking. She gasped, her whole universe becoming focused to a single point. Driving her to mindlessness as she fisted her hands in his hair and curled her toes. "Bucky, Bucky please, please, yes…"

"You taste so sweet," he said, the sensation of his voice vibrating through her.

She was gasping, moaning, writhing against the wall, as he flicked against her with his tongue. He built her until she couldn't take any more and then she came. Gloriously, shatteringly; trembling above him as he milked every inch of pleasure he could.

Jenny felt her body liquify, and he lifted her from the ledge and held her in his arms. Her head lolled onto his shoulder, reveling in the glow throughout her body as he pressed his lips to her forehead over and over.

"Bucky," she said. She pulled his mouth to hers and she could taste herself on his tongue. The sensation of his skin on hers after he took her over the edge was pure comfort. But she needed more. "Fuck me," she said. "Fuck me properly."

The grin on his face warmed her all over, but it dissolved into a serious intensity. "I told you, I don't want to just fuck you," he said. "I want to make love to you." He searched her eyes for hesitation, but all she could do was burrow her head in his neck, as hot tears threatened to break through her defenses. She was suddenly fragile in his arms, not weak, just wanted and valued.

"Will you let me?" he asked.

"Yes," she breathed. She held his face in her hand and laid a soft kiss on his lips. "Make love to me."

He grinned and carried her over to the bed. He threw back the sheets and laid her down, then unbuckled his belt staring down at her. She stretched on the mattress, spreading her legs, her hands running down over herself waiting for him. Her eyes raked over his body, so incredibly strong and muscled. The transition from skin to metal on his shoulder didn't jar her. There was puckering and scarring and she wanted to touch it. Kiss it. Tell him he was beautiful and powerful and wonderful. Cut from marble and pain and stronger for it. And right now he was hers.

He pushed off his jeans and her eyes widened at his size. She was desperate for it. He climbed over her, and she pressed herself up against him, finding his lips, tangling their tongues.

"I love you," he said between kisses. She believed it this time. She let herself believe it.

"I love you so much," she said.

"I never want to let you go."

"Then don't. Don't let me go," she breathed. His touch was electric, and she wanted to feel the buzz of it forever.

He bent his head and kissed her breasts over and over, claiming them. Grazing her nipples with his teeth, his tongue like silk, trailing his mouth down her stomach and back up.

Sliding her arm between them she took him in her hand pulling her fingers down his length. He let out a grunt and gave her a bruising kiss. "Tell me what you want," he said.

"Please," she said. "All I want is you inside me."

The growl in his chest deepened and his flesh hand moved between her thighs. He stroked her, his movements deft and loving then pushed two fingers inside, stretching her for him.

She let out a cry digging into his shoulders. "Oh god, oh fuck."

He held her in a kiss, pulling moans from her throat. Then placing himself at her entrance, he sank into her depths. She gasped, undulating upward, her body pitching from pleasure and she called out his name. His strength moved over her as she cradled him between her legs and rolled her pelvis up as he thrust over and over. He filled her completely, his movements measured and rough. Their lips brushed every time he pushed, and she dug her fingers into his back, clamoring for more of him.

The coil unwound, the tingles blooming in her abdomen again.

"Look at me," he said with a grunt. "I want to see."

She forced her eyes open, and she was met with deep blue, fathomless and beautiful. She was going to drown in their depth. A tear rolled down her cheek as the pleasure grew so intense she could hardly stand it. It was going to consume her if she didn't say his name. "Bucky, BUCKY, JAMES." Then she rolled over the crest, arching off the bed, shattering as she exploded inside. Every endless possibility with him stretched out around her, tying her heartstrings to his future.

She quivered in his arms, his own pleasure pulsing into her, trembling and racking his body. She clutched at his back, her nails scratching into his skin and then scraping metal until the tremors started to abate. Then she started to cry. Cry because it felt so good. Cry because it was him, and he was strong and lovely and Bucky. Cry because when she looked in his eyes, she was the only one in them.

He rolled her on top of him and held her as he guided the remnants of tingles up and down with both hands. One, feeling and sensitive and searching, the other, restrained power that guided and fought and won.

"Jenny," he said, wet and hot into her ear. It was a release. A permission to keep crying. Crying until she was spent and boneless in his arms. "Did I hurt you?" he asked, wiping away her tears with his thumbs.

She shook her head, her fingers tracing his face. "You healed me."

He smiled and pulled her chin to him giving her sweet soft kisses.