OKay, everybody. The 'Foot Locker isn't really a foot locker' thing was rather... um... DERANGED. So I've made a new thing to put in your reviews for my personal satisfaction of knowing that you reviewed. When you do, type, 'Ducks look good with mumps', okay? That's what you MUST put into your reviews.

I have also learned that once my story gets eight chapters (which it WILL, by the way, and more), I will have far too many reviews to answer. So I will stop. However, I just want you all to know that I read over each and every review, and I greatly appreciate every one.

Remember to put 'Ducks look good with mumps' in your review!

ON WITH THE STORY...

Kiba was led down the dark passegeways until he came to the Know Your Stars room, and sat in the director's chair.

How is this torture? he thought. Then he heard the voice.

Know Your Shinobi... Know Your Shinobi... Know Your Shinobi...

Kiba Inuzuka.

wears his hood all the time so that no one sees his hair is really blue.

"What? My hair isn't blue." said Kiba. Akamaru barked in agreement.

Kiba Inuzuka.

thinks Hinata will someday love him.

"Well... I hope that." confessed Kiba. "I just want her to be happy."

Kiba Inuzuka.

wears a tutu when he goes on missions.

"I do NOT!" yelled Kiba. "I wear my jacket, pants, and headband! NOT a tutu!"

Yeah, right.

"I mean it!"

Go back to your dancing lesson... Tutu-Man.

"Why don't you shut the fuck up?"

'Coz I don't want to."

"I want you to! Hello? HELLO! Listen, I think that you have serious PROBLEMS!" More applause played in the backgroud as an angry and confused Kiba was led away by a peppy and happy hamster in a suit.

"What the hell was that?" asked Kiba as he was taken back to the waiting room.

"You'll see... you'll see..." said the hamster, sounding more evil than Kiba could imagine was possible for such a cute little hamster.

When he got back to the room, everyone was gathered around a forty-inch plasma screen TV with their mouths agape.

"Your hair is BLUE?" inquired Ino.

"Y-you want m-me to L-LOVE you?" stuttered Hinata.

"You wear a TUTU when you go on missions?" gaped Naruto.

"That was all a LIE!" screamed Kiba. Everybody stared at him.

"Oh." said Tenten.

"That's a relief." muttered Sasuke.

"HEY, HEY, HEY!" yelled the hamster. "The rest of you need to go through your... TORTURE. So, Haruno, you come with me."

Sakura stood up reluctantly and, still remembering the gun incident, followed the hamster without blinking an eye. About thirty seconds later, she appeared on the plasma-screen.

Know Your Shinobi... Know Your Shinobi... Know Your Shinobi...

Haruno Sakura.

She's had Sasuke reject her more times than she can keep track of.

"That's true, but why'd you have to bring it up? It's not exactly something I like to think about." said Sakurra in a small voice.

Like I care. Haruno Sakura.

She wants to marry Sasuke and make his dreams come true. That's her lifelong dream.

"Hey, How'd you know that? HEY, THE OTHERS CAN SEE THIS, CAN'T THEY? YOU BLURTED OUT MY SECRET TO ALL OF THEM!"

Everybody stared at the screen, but Sasuke looked the most shocked. Oh, shit, I didn't hurt her that much... Did I?

Haruno Sakura.

She wants to become the next Tsunade and overcome her by a long shot.

"Once again.. YOU'RE BREAKING INTO MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT!" Sakura screamed. "SHUT UP!"

I must ignore... Haruno Sakura.

You know what? I quit! This job is full of making up insults! There was a shuffling sound in the background, followed by muffled shouting and a distaint BANG! Then all was quiet.

"What the hell was that?" muttered Gaara. Everybody was too shocked to speak.

Finally, a new hamster came out and took Sakura away from the room. A few seconds later she came into the waiting room. Everybody noticed she had blood dripping from her hand.

"What the FUCK happened?" asked Neji.

"Uhm... the hamster who was supposed to be making up insults quit, and when an employee of all that came in, he took out a pistol and shot him. The guy's in the hospital now, and we have to go to our next Torture."

"Oh, joy," muttered Temari. "What do we have to do?"

"MUST I say it?" asked Sakura.

"Uh, YEAH." Naruto yelled in her face. She looked at him like this: O.O

"Alrighty, then. We-"

"I'LL tell you that." said an awfully familiar voice. Everybody looked up and saw Kakashi standing there, Kurenai beside him. "Your next form of torture will be one you all may indefinitely enjoy, ne? I'm quite sure you'll love... MAKING OUT WITH THESE PAIRINGS!" he yelled, throwing a small scroll in the air. Naruto, who was closest, grabbed the scroll and opened it.

SakuraxSasuke

InoxShikamaru

HinataxNaruto

TentenxNeji

TemarixRock Lee

As for Kiba and Gaara, we do not have any more

girls for them to make out with, so we have designated that

they watch their "Know Your Stars" tapes until the

make-out sessions are over.

"You're kidding." said Temari, her voice dripping with anger. "I have to kiss bowling ball head over there!" She strode over to Kakashi, pointed a finger in his face, and said in a scary tone, "I will NOT do that, understand?"

"If you don't... well, I'll just show you, hmm?" Kakashi pulled out a remote from his pocket and pressed a button on it. A safe fell from the celing, crashing on the floor with a tremendous CLANG!

"That could have landed on you, you know," stated Kakashi. "We also have grand pianos, giand rocks, two-ton-weights, anvils-"

"I get it!" said Temari. But if you make me do this one more time, you are DEAD!"

"Fair enough. Now get with the making out, or..." Kakashi pointed at the safe. There was no need for explanation.

Everyone moved closer to their designated couples.

Reluctantly...

Closer...

Closer...

POOT.

"Naruto, did you just fart?"

"Um... maybe."

"Well, DON'T!"

"I'm sorry! It was unintentional!"

"Do you even know what that word means?"

"Yes!"

"SHADDAP!" screeched Kurenai. "GET ON WITH TORTURE PHASE TWO OR SOMEBODY'S GONNA GET HIT WITH A EAVY OBJECT, GET IT, NARUTO AND SAKURA?"

They both nodded fearfully.

"GOOD!"

Closer...

Closer...

TBC...

HAH! I'm so evil... cutting off at that exact second! Also, the Foot Locker thing was gay, so instead, please type Rubber Sox Have Chicken Pox in your reviews, so that I know you read this. I will continue once I have exactly 40 reviews, so you'd better start reviewing if you want more!

I finished typing this on Superbowl Sunday, 2006, so I'm just gonna say... "GO STEELERS!" If you feel diffferently, I apoligize, but

I have lived all but a few precious days of babyhood in PA, so I love both football teams. Once again, GO STEELERS!

-Natsyourlord likes candy.