Turbo Team Movie
It all started out as the normal, boring first day of school. Today I was determined to meet the mysterious man behind the wall. We have been using Morse Code to communicate to each other all last year. I bet he's such a stud muffin. When I was walking I accidentally knocked over some stupid seventh grader wearing a name tag with Jake written on it. I mean what kind of moron wears a name tag?
I had to be the luckiest girl in the world. I had just transferred to a new school, but that's not the lucky part. My unannounced love, Alex had transferred here to. I knew him from space camp. I was on the ground floor and he was in the space shuttle. We exchanged data all day. I knew from that moment on that was in love. He even once sent me a message saying that it was 29◦ outside. The next day I put a tracker in his waffle. Actually more of I covered the tracker in syrup and made him think it was a waffle. I kinda felt bad because he started to choke and I had to get him rushed to the hospital. In the end I paid a surgeon to take out his spleen and put the tracker in its place. What he doesn't know won't kill him (I hope). So now I know where he is every second of his life.
That mission trip was the best thing I'd ever done. Helping impoverished Eron employs gives you that real, feel good feeling. While babysitting at the nursery I worked with another boy. He spoke Turtle. Kegan as he was called, put his heart and soul into that mission trip. He left with my respect and my email address.
St. Syrp was and elite college prep school for middle schoolers in Canada. My last year had been a torture made endurable by one close friend, Paul the Pancake. His knowledge and skill was surpassed by only my mind. Graduating from St. Syrp was the suckiest day of my life.
"Come on it's time to see Dr. Turtle" said the Nurse. Weeeee I squealed as I jumped up and ran down the hallway to see him. He was my favorite Doctor. I walked up to the door and heard Turtle speaking from inside. He was talking to a mysterious stranger on the phone. "Yes, of course I've got the girl. Yes she's coming right now. I know the risks but it's a chance we've got to take. I'm sure she can fit through the window her head it the perfect size for the job. Okey doky to bad I don't understand Turtle" I thought. Then I flung the door open and sat down in a chair in front of his desk. "Bye mom yes, I love you too…Bye!" he hanged up the phone. "Well nice to see you, yes very nice indeed" he said. "So how has your squiggly spooch been feeling better? He asked "Well it… "Yes of course that's real interesting" interrupted Turtle. You see my deer today I need your help." Said Turtle "Does it have to do with the mashed potatoes?" I asked "Hey how do you know about that? Oh never mind. Let's get to the point. I need you to help me break open this window and your head seems to be big enough to work" said Turtle. "Will this hurt" I asked. "Oh…of course not!" replied Turtle "Just go stand over there I rolled out of my chair over to the window. "yes very good" said Turtle. He snapped his finger and six body guards came and picked me up and used my head as a batting ram to open the window. "Free ant last" he yelled as he escaped out of the window. I'm gonna miss him I thought but I heard an ice-cream truck drive by so I decided to chase it. I never figured out why it kept stopping and asking if I wanted to buy something.
I continued down the hall. My schedule said that I had foreign language first period with Couch Diles. Hmmm I wonder what language I'm taking I thought. I opened the door and sat down. Across the room was sitting Kegan smearing his face into a plate of cake. Wow that kids got problems I thought. A few seconds later Alex walked in with another girl whom he seemed completely oblivious to. She sat down next to me. "Hi" she said "That's Alex my boyfriend." "Who said that" Alex screamed and hid under his desk. "Hey want some cake?" Kegan asked "Can you hear her, that voice?" asked Alex "Well yeah duh she's sitting right there. Kegan pointed to her and she waved at him. "Hey I like your pants." said Kegan "Yeah there pretty fancy. Can I call you Fancy Pants?" I asked "Yeah sure" replied Fancy Pants. "Show yourself!" Yelled Alex who was shaking violently and in a fetal position. "You know I don't think he can see you" I said "NOOO yelled Fancy Pants We will work this out my love!
How could everything be perfect one minute and be all wrong the next? I ran to the bathroom and hid behind the trashcan. A girl who had apparently heard my crying walked up and put her arm on my shoulder. "Hey" she said while raising her eyebrows. "Are you alright?" she asked "My love can't see me and I can't bend my left elbow" I yelled and started to cry harder. "That happened to me once. I mean not the invisibility problem the elbow one. I think it had to do with a brownie and that one guy." She said "Hey can I call you FG?" I asked "Ummm… no" she replied "What about NFG?" I asked "umm… OK!" she said "Let's go to class. Maby we can fix my problem then." I said We merrily frolicked down the hall until we realized that we had different classes. So we parted our ways.
I rummaged around in my locker and pulled our my geometry book, "Finding the fifth dimension", and walked down the hall. I thought I saw someone who looked like that guy from the mission trip. Out of nowhere, some girl yelled "I'm gonna roll in the floor now!" a blur with brown hair fell in front of my converse and tripped me. We landed in a jumble in front of a turtle. "Dr. Tater!" she said Well I think she said Dr. Tater. I glared at her and she smiled back. The turtle ran off. The girl said "Dr. Tater used my head.!" This time it sounded more like Dr. Turtle but that doesn't make sense. "Well then, I guess that makes you a tater head" she shrugged and I gave and evil laugh. "You chuckled!" she said "Did not, that was a mechanical laugh!" "Whatever…, Chuckles!"
I was the only person sitting at the lunch table. Then some random redhead sat down along with another girl. Then the invisible girl from the bathroom, walked over with some other girl. "Hey." I nodded and kept eating. A few guys sat down at the end of the oddly long table. "Hey NFG this is Chuckles and Taterhead. We met in Lit class." "Oh hi nice to meet you." I looked at the nameless girl, "So where are you from?" I asked her. "I'm from the mystical land of… TURBO" she replied. (little did we know this was a turning point in our lives) "Ok Turbo", I said. Fancy Pants joyfully greeted Alex; Alex curled up under the table in the fetal position and started to mumble about the voices in his head.
I sat across from Kegan. He was eating a slice of lemon pie when he figured it out. "I've figured it out. Alex must have a physiological problem and that why he can't see Fancy Pants." Kegan said Alex couldn't hear their conversation though because he was crying in the lunchroom corner while Paul was trying to calm him. "We need to try to fix his problem. Said NFG I just read a book about these sorts of problems and I said that if we do a few simple exercises it will help Alex realize that she is real and everything will be normal." "Uggg Tara thinks she is sooo smart. I could have thought of that. HEY is that a mango?" I yelled "Yes of course it is. Go chase it." Said Jake. "Weeeeee I squealed as I ran up to the mango. "Hey I'm not a mango!" yelled Turtle I picked up the mango and ran back to the table. They were still talking about the same stupid topic. So I got bored and put the mango in my mouth. "Taterhead, that's not a mango!" yelled Turbo as she slapped me on the back and the mango flew across the table landing in Jake's lap.
"Hey that's him the man behind the wall! I screamed as I pointed to Zach. We sent each other Morse Code messages all last year and now he wants to meet me!" All the color went out of Jake's face. He just sat there zombie like. Zach walked toward me. "Hey can I have some of your ketchup" he asked "Umm… sure here you go" I said as I handed him the ketchup. "I'm so happy to finally meet you!" I said in delight "Oh whatever." he mumbled and walked away "Isn't he absolutely dreamy? I think we must be soul mates." I said "Yeah his shoe looks about the right size." NFG said, "I think we need to help Alex. Alex began DDRing while lying prone on the floor. "Come on the bathroom is empty!" I said. So we all skipped off to the girl's bathroom.
"He doesn't love me." I yelled and started to cry. "He doesn't love you. He doesn't love you." Taterhead started to sing "Shut up!" Chuckles yelled as she body slammed her into the stall. Taterhead fell in the toilet. "Owiee!" she yelled and started to take all the toilet to make it not hurt as bad when you hit your head on it. "That'll teach you! Meanie toilet!" she screamed "Hey Taterhead why don't you go use the boys bathroom instead." Said Turbo "Ok." She screamed as she ran our the door. Several screams were heard in the distance. "Ok I've got a plan." Said Turbo
Ding, Ding all ten of us had Co-Ed PE next. Some rushed down to the gym. Coach Diles stood on the Basketball court. "You chumps ready to play Dodge Ball?" The teams were girls against guys. Taterhead couldn't walk straight from the toilet incident so she sat out of the game. Adrian guarded the pin by sitting in front of it but she soon realized that it wasn't the best strategy. Turtle guarded the pin on the other side. Our attacks were fierce! We wasted two balls on hitting the pin. Turtle deflected balls back at us. We lost NFG and Adrian; two brave souls. "We daren't risk another frontal attack! That turtle's dynamite!" yelled Turbo. She threw a wild ball that knocked out Kegan and Jake. Jake was out cold for two minutes. I took a ball to the lower calve. "I've been wounded!" I thrashed about on the gym floor til Couch Diles made me get up. I got mad because he didn't care that Taterhead was throwing a temper tantrum and yelling that she wanted a cookie. "Hey there's a cookie." Yelled Turbo pointing to the Turtle "Cookie?" yelled Taterhead as she ran and stole the Turtle. She sat in the stands and started chewing on it. Out of nowhere Paul's special problems kicked in. Paul ran into a few walls and eventually volleyball net while yelling "I'm a pancake! I'm a pancake!
Alex picked up the ball and whammed it at the pin. He still couldn't see Fancypants. The ball left a red mark across her face. Alex jumped in joy. Fancypants had stumbled into the pin and knocked it over. She picked up the pin and hit him across the face with it. "Ahh!" yelled Alex "I forgive you. I will pray for your soul." said Fancypants as she gave him a hug. Alex suddenly spontaneously combusted. Thankfully Couch Diles had an emergency bucket of water.
Ding, Ding That was one heck of a first day. Paul invited us over. When the bus dropped us off in front of his house, Chuckles mumbled "Excellent…" Laura stuttered something about it being slightly larger than hers and Taterhead was singing nursery rhymes. Honestly, everyone else at St. Syrup's had huge vacation houses in South America, everyone but me. Alex was looking very nervous. Probably since Chuckles had handcuffed him to Fancypants. We snickered together. I jotted down notes on his reaction. The gate opened and we followed Paul in. "Let's go to my room." Paul said Not that we could have gone anywhere else. His house was a maze of hallways and rooms. On the way Fancypants opened a door and stepped into the room. After some screaming Kegan saved her and we found Paul's room. "What are we going to do for Alex!" Fancypants sobbed after remembering his existence. "Well, first we should run a few tests to check the source of his problems then Turbo rudely cut me off. "Hold a voodoo Ritual!" We all stared. "Ok how about just a ritual?" Everyone else cheered. I took some noted on mob physiology. Paul led the way to the ritual room. It was just three doors down. "Why are we gonna have a ritual?" Alex asked. "So that we can summon the ferrets of doom!" Chuckles yelled. "Okay! Just don't sic em on me." Taterhead said. "It's this way." Said Paul as he walked through his closet. We all followed him through his closet and walked into the ritual room. "Let it begin!" Turbo yelled. Jake and Kegan began hanging the sacrificial amulets. "What do we need?" the asked. "The usual" Paul said. They did some random crap involving sand and a lock of emo hair. For a full account, look at my notes on Mob Psychology. We began to chant. Alex and Fancypants both passed out. I must investigate the affects of electrical currents on handcuffs I thought. Alex awoke first. "OMG! Who is that?" Alex yelled. "Your internet girlfriend" Kegan said. "Oh Ok" Zack stumbled in and asked "Where's the bathroom?" "OMG! I love you! I'll show you where the bathroom is….