2

They spent the night inside the cave. Even as he dozed off from time to time, Richard still hugged Julia to him protectively, in an effort to share his body heat with her. She was still bundled up in his thick coat, but he covered her with the thermal pads that he had brought along with him on his survival kit. She wasn't shivering anymore and she seemed to be breathing normally. She was asleep. She muttered in her sleep occasionally but Richard just can't make out the words.

At that moment, he felt as though time froze in the cold weather. She was with him; she was his and everything was fine. He kissed the top of her head affectionately, wanting to make her to feel just how much he loves her.

But as the light entered their little haven, he realized that dreamtime is over. She was still not safe. He needed to get her back to the city, away from the danger and harsh climate. He placed his bag in front of him as he carried Julia on his back. It'll be more comfortable for the two of them that way, as his arms were numb because of holding on to her all night. It took him a while to stand because his whole body ached, but it didn't matter.

He squinted as he saw the sun's light but he thanked Hyne that the storm had stopped temporarily. The fiends hated the sun so they won't be bothering them much for now. Everything seemed to be getting brighter that day, and he was glad.

He used his compass to guide him on his trek back to his small vessel. He expected them to get there by nightfall if things stayed the way they were right now. He only hoped that he was lucky enough.

He had been walking for a good hour or so, when he suddenly felt Julia move on his back.

"Hmm… where… where am I?" she sounded so weak, but her voice was the best thing he had ever heard.

"I'm so glad you're awake," he said with a sigh of relief. "Don't worry, I'll get you out of here."

He was surprised when her arms suddenly fastened around his neck and she gave him a weak yet tight embrace.

"I knew you'd come back for me. I just knew that you would. I'm so happy you're here," she has never sounded this happy in her life.

"I made a promise to you didn't I?" his own emotions were preventing him to say more. He felt as though his chest would burst any moment now.

"But I can't sing for you right now. I'm sorry." He was suddenly confused. Maybe she was still delirious and that kept her from making much sense.

"It's all right, your voice is enough for me." He felt her sigh in his neck. He completely forgot all about his aches and pains.

"Please don't leave me again," she begged him, her arms tightening her embrace.

"I won't. I'll never let you go again," his voice almost shook with emotion as he touched her arm in reassurance.

Her breathing slowed down once more, he knew she was going to fall asleep again. He didn't bother to wake her up, letting her get the rest she needed.

"I…I love you…" she mumbled. Something was triggered inside him and a tear fell from his eyes. He stopped on his tracks as he felt her words reach his own heart. He had waited so long to hear those words.

"What... what did you say?" he asked, unable to stop himself from doing so.

"I said… I love you." He was the happiest man in the world.

"I love you, Laguna Loire."

She finally fell asleep, her head contentedly resting on his shoulder. At that same moment he felt a knife, slice through his heart as he saw his dreams get shattered to pieces.

She thought he was another man.

The embrace did not belong to him, the words of love she uttered were not meant for his ears to hear. He never knew that hearing those three precious words from her for the first time would actually break his heart.

He had to struggle to walk as his feet suddenly felt like a ton each. To make things worse, rain started to fall again… but he didn't realize that they were nothing more than his own tears.

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Things started to get bad, and when he thought they couldn't get any worse, they did. He was already drowning himself in his loneliness and self-pity when the hailstorm started once more. He was walking for 4 hours straight; He was tired, weary and heartbroken. He almost felt that the weather matched his mood. He couldn't stop himself from shivering slightly for he felt hollow and cold; and his love for Julia was not enough to warm him.

The snow-like mud was almost reaching his knees and he knew that fiends might come out since the sun was gone. Looking at how grim everything was, he thought that it would be best to stop and rest for a while. Maybe a short rest was all he needed.

He carefully placed Julia on a comfortable position on the ground, making her lean on the solid wall. He picked up some weeds, sticks and other things that he would need to make a fire. After three tries, he finally succeeded and he sat down across the pianist to appreciate his work. As his shivering abated, he couldn't help but look at her and see that she looked quite satisfied despite their current situation. She was asleep, wearing his coat, and on the same cave as he was yet her mind was still with that lost soldier she gave her heart to. How could life be this ironic? She was so near yet so far from him. She was living on this illusionary world she didn't fully intend to create. She was delirious after all.

He had to get over his self-pity and he knew it. If he really loved her then seeing her happy would be his best interest, even if it were on his own expense. However, at that moment, it was too painful. He just realized how much she loved another, and how hopeless it was for her to find her happiness with him instead.

He focused his mind on something else as he tore away his gaze from her. He reached for his knapsack and got some instant food he brought with him. Surely their metabolic rate had increased as they are in a cooler climate. They have already missed several meals and if they don't get to eat anything then their energy levels will be totally depleted. He knew this as it had been discussed over and over again during his classes in military school.

After a while, his can of soup was finally ready to be eaten. He inched closer to Julia and nudged her gently.

"Wake up. Time to eat, sleepyhead," he said, forcing himself to lighten up. After a minute, she started to stir and she rewarded him with her sweetest smile.

"Good morning," she sighed as she reached for his face.

"You need to eat to regain your strength," he told her as he spoon-fed her. She agreed willingly although she ate very slowly. She was still weak.

"Laguna… I never thought you could cook," she said with a grin before she took another spoonful of the soup Richard fed her.

He almost winced when he heard her refer to him as Laguna once more. She was still in her illusionary world and she was happy. What right did he have to wake her up and sadden her?

"Actually, you're eating canned soup. But I'm glad you liked it," he said with a small laugh. If a Laguna was what she wants, then he'd be a Laguna for her.

"Yeah… I thought so…" she grinned again then she leaned on his shoulder. She let out another contented sigh and looked as if she's going to fall asleep again. He let her sleep, thinking that she had eaten enough. She nearly finished the soup he gave her. He carefully ate his share, which was whatever she left and gave in to a quick rest.

He knew that it would be like taking advantage of her if he continued to go along with her game. But what could he do when she was deliriously out of her mind? He doesn't really have any other choice. He had to accept her love as another man for the meanwhile. This is the only chance he'd get. Once she's back to her right frame of mind, he'd be Richard again, a man she once loved, but only as a close friend. As Laguna, he'd be the man she loves with all her heart.

That's all he has now. It's probably the only chance he'd ever get. He'd take her love, that's meant for another man. It would be better than throwing away the love that she's willing to give.

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After barely an hour of rest, Richard continued his trek once more. He knew that he had already wasted time – which was very crucial at that moment. Their rations will be all used up by the next day and Julia's condition might worsen. The snowstorm might also get worse. They really had to get out of there.

He had hoisted up Julia on his back again and used a stick to help him walk. He didn't want to admit it but he was also getting weaker and he didn't know when his body would finally give out. He was very determined and he didn't want to ever break his promise to Julia but he's still human. Humans break when they over exert themselves. But if he had to be a God to save Julia then he'd be one. Just like how he's willing to be the infamous Laguna Loire for her.

His thoughts were briefly stopped when a Vysage with a Lefty and a Righty confronted them. They were surrounded. He knew he had to flee, but they'd follow them anyway. He had to finish them or at least injure them so he could have more time to get away from them. Julia was still on his back, and he was afraid that she might get hit once the monsters decide to hit him there. He grabbed his gun and fired at the Lefty that was behind him, then as quickly as he had done that, he turned around and fired at the two other fiends. They moaned in agony

Because of his rough movements, Julia stirred in his back. She groaned a little and she seemed to sense that something was wrong.

"Laguna…" He could hear the fear in her voice.

"I'm fine. Hold on tight to me, you hear. We're going to be fine," Richard told her as his eyes were gazing intently at his opponents. He needed to know which one would attack next.

The Lefty was ready to grab him and he was quick enough to avoid it. Next time, he might not be too lucky. He saw a weak spot and fired once more. The lefty writhed for a while then it vanished to thin air. 1 down, 2 to go. Galbadian officers were trained to be ruthless in combat. They may not have the gift of magic, unlike the Estharian soldiers but their weapons and strength were boosted up to their maximum capacity.

The Right hand suddenly aimed for his back and he turned around as quickly as he could to receive the blow on his front instead. He almost fell but he retorted with another well-aimed shot. The Vysage was about to cast a spell but the general was too fast for it. He shot it between the eyes and it died almost instantly.

"Laguna? Is it over?" she murmured to him, "Are you hurt?"

"I'm fine," he said while touching his sore chest. His knapsack served as armor so didn't get the Righty's blow in full force. But it was painful; he thought it might even form a bruise.

"I was worried about you. I didn't know what to do if you ever get hurt," Julia said and he felt a tear fall on his shoulder. "At nights, I thought about you. Wondering if you were all right. It had been months since you left… I knew you'd come back; you promised me. But…" she stopped for a while as she took a deep breath. She usually does that to keep the tears from falling.

Richard had to reach behind him to wipe away her tears as her head was laid on his shoulder. "Hush. It's all right."

"No it's not… Every night, every moment, I think of you. But I can't help but wonder, what if you got injured? What if you're hurt? Who'll take care of you? Are you still alive?" she said with much emotion it pinched his heart.

She was always concerned about him. He wondered if she thought of him the same way when he was sent on missions and such. He later realized that she probably didn't, after all, he's not that important for her.

"I always think about you too, wherever I go," he told her what was in his heart, what was inside the heart of General Richard Caraway. He knew that it would reach her, thinking it came from the man she loved, but it didn't really matter for him. He just wanted to reassure her that someone thought of her just as much.

As the tears died down, he expected her to fall asleep once more, but he was surprised when she spoke after a few minutes.

"Sometimes, I imagined you there, watching me. Your eyes were looking at me intently as I sang my… song for you. The song I told you about, remember?" she said dreamily.

Of course Richard didn't have the memories. "Yeah?"

"Eyes on me, I… that song's for you. It was my last attempt to get you back. Maybe you'd hear it and return, like you have promised… to see me sing live. I put my whole heart into it Laguna… and it worked right?" she told him softly as she tightened her hold on him.

It was the song that made her famous. Every person in Deling, and probably the whole world must have heard it at least once. You could hear it anywhere. It was the most beautiful song he had ever heard. And he was sure that if he were Loire, he'd get up and go back to her, even if he was 6-feet under. He knew that it was bad to think ill of other people but he's a soldier himself. He knew the risks that all of them take.

"Yes…" the words came out painfully from his mouth. He'd give up anything just to hear her sing her song for him, even just once as he had often wished. Yet then he perfectly knew that she was addressing the true person it was dedicated to. He knew it was bad to lie to her and get her hopes up but what could he do? He couldn't hurt her. He just prayed that she'd forget everything once she wakes up.

"I love you Laguna."

"… I love you too…"

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Nighttime came once more and the pair settled inside a cave. The winds were fast and furious and can be heard roaring loudly, even from inside the cave. Richard thought that tonight was the coldest night so far. His body felt cold, so did his heart.

After several attempts, fire finally formed on the sticks and weeds he had piled up. He tried to stop himself from shaking but his body had its own mind at that moment. He looked at Julia and noticed that she wasn't shivering – it's an indication that she could bear the cold. He didn't want to go closer to her and hug her to him like he did when he had first found her, just to seek her warmth. He felt that he took advantage of her situation too much already, and the least he could do was to leave her alone in peace. He took the cold as penance for all that he had done.

He looked at his knapsack and checked their supplies. Their rations will be finished by tomorrow. In his haste to rescue Julia a few days ago, he didn't get to pack more supplies. He didn't expect the rescue to take more than two days. However, he had some supplies in the boat he used to get to Salt Lake. If only he could get there sooner.

He got lost twice today because he avoided several fiends he saw as a threat on the way. It was a good thing that he found his way back but then it was already too dark so he had to stop yet again. If only he had perfect vision at night, he would've continued walking. He couldn't risk it; it would be better for them to stop. After all, he was not only putting himself at risk but Julia as well.

His feet felt very sore and he guessed that they were blistered already. He carefully stretched out his legs and massaged his calf. His whole body was in fact screaming in pain yet his only compensation was to see Julia fine, breathing and well. That's what his sacrifices are for anyway.

Julia suddenly murmured in her sleep. She shook lightly and Richard was so alarmed that he went beside her to hold her hand. He thought she was in pain, but as he looked closer into her face, he noticed a smile on her lips.

"I guess it's Loire again…" he thought bitterly as he sat down beside her and glanced at her direction. "But then if you're happy, I won't care."

"Who am I fooling?" he unconsciously said his thoughts aloud. He gently brushed away the hair from her face so he can get a look at her more carefully. She was the most beautiful girl he had ever known… and she had the most beautiful heart as well. He knew for they grew up together. They may have been apart for quite a long time but some feelings never change.

"This might be… this would be the last time I'll be looking at you like this again." His hands dropped from her face. It's hopeless. He can never be half the man Loire was no matter how much he tried to pretend.

His thoughts were stopped when he heard fiends making noises nearby. He was quickly on his guard as he cocked his gun and prepared himself for battle. He cautiously walked outside to face the enemy before they even get cornered and harmed inside their own shelter.

If he had stayed longer, he would've heard Julia utter not Laguna's name… but his.