Disclaimer: I own nothing, just the silly plot.
George twirled about in front of Baldrick, hands clasping the frilly edges of his sleeves.
"Well? What d'you think?" he half-giggled, bouncing slightly.
"I think you look lovely, sir." Baldrick smiled proudly, bowing as George curtsied to him.
"I think you're both utterly mad." Captain Blackadder scowled, returning from HQ. "George, finish getting ready. Your date with Walrus begins in less than ten minutes."
George clapped his hands together, sighing with anticipation. "Oh, the fun we'll have...walking in the moonlight...fine dining..."
"Tempted to do that myself so I can get a good meal..." Baldrick said wistfully.
"Private, you wouldn't look like a woman if a fairy waved her magic wand and turned you into one." Blackadder sighed, returning to his desk to write.
"Nonsense, why, he'd make such a pretty girl!" George said, bending over the small shaving mirror so he could apply the dark red lipstick and blush to his cheeks. "Humm. Shall I go with the eye-pencils or not?"
"By all means, gouge your eyes out." Blackadder didn't look up from his writing. "When you're done, go outside. Bob is waiting with the car."
George gave himself one final glance-over, then swept outside, feeling as if every step were lighter than air.
Bob seemed very impressed.
"You look ravishing, Georgie." she grinned at him, as she drove up towards HQ. "Wig's a bit off though - here." she adjusted it a little, then smiled again. "There we go."
"Thank you so much, Bob." he fiddled with his hands in his lap. "I must confess - now that we're here - I'm rather nervous."
"You'll be fine, you'll be fine!" she helped him out and hugged him. "I'll be in the front if you need me."
"Oh, Bob - if you weren't a boy - I'd give you such a kiss!" he sighed.
"Wouldn't you kiss me anyway? Surely you'd kiss Melchett, and he's a man..." Bob wheedled, taking George's hand.
"Oh, right." he pecked her briefly on the cheek, then hurried off into the building.
She leaned against the car, touching her face where his lips still seemed to burn, and rubbed the little bit of lipstick between her fingertips.
"Good luck." she said aloud into the quiet night.