The Promises We Make
A/N: I wrote this because I thought Derek deserved a kick in the butt. A new chapter of Healing Process is forthcoming. But Ava is making an appearance in this story too. I couldn't resist. This has nothing to do with Healing Process though. Think of it as an alternate introduction to Addison and Derek's family, enjoy!
"…Because I'm not Meredith Grey!" Addison Montgomery-Shepherd said feeling angry, hurt, frustrated, and sad all in the same moment.
Derek was about to end this very public conversation when another voice beat him to it, "Mommy?"
Addison looked up and saw from over Derek's shoulder, a pair of dark green eyes staring at her uncertainly. Derek turned at almost the same exact moment to look at the intruder and came face to face with his daughter. She was standing at the top of the stairs looking at them both as if she didn't recognize them.
"Ava," said Derek. "What are you doing here?"
"Don't," Ava Shepherd replied quietly breezing past her father, the faint smell of Chanel No.5 wafting under his nose as she went straight for Addison.
"We'll talk about this later," Derek said before heading down the stairs, receiving a dirty look from Richard as he went and then headed straight for the elevator.
"Did she just call She-Shepherd "Mommy"?" Cristina whispered to Meredith.
"She did."
Addison put her arm around her daughter and they headed in the opposite direction moving toward the surgical office suites. Addison's own was close by and neither woman spoke until they were inside.
Addison kissed and hugged Ava tightly again before settling on the sofa, "What are you doing here butterfly?" But she knew that that particular question was rhetorical, from the second Addison and Ava made eye contact, Addison knew that Ava needed her.
"I needed my mommy," Ava said quietly.
"And I needed you," Addison replied pulling Ava into her arms. The 19 year-old let herself be hugged and cuddled. It was overdue after nearly seven months of not seeing one's own mother.
"Was that Dad?" Ava asked turning her head to look at Addison.
"Yes that was your father."
"Are you sure the real Derek Shepherd wasn't abducted by aliens?"
"I wish sweetheart."
"And this is what you gave New York and our house up for?"
"Yes."
"Seriously?"
"Yes."
"Mommy….you need to come home."
"I can't just leave."
"Daddy doesn't deserve you…"
"How did you get here?"
"I took a plane Mom."
"Haha," Addison said dryly. "I thought you had finals?"
"I'm already done, I finished this morning and as soon as I got out of my genetics final Jackson surprised me with a plane ticket."
"Remind me to thank him when I get a chance?"
"I will. He booked me into a suite at the Four Seasons…." Ava said with a smirk in her voice. "Will you come stay with me?" She looked up at Addison with puppy dog eyes.
"You are too much, you know that?" Addison said a small smile appearing on her face. "But yes, I will come with you. Just let me check on a couple of patients and see Richard and then we'll go ok?" Addison said kissing her forehead and then rising.
"Ok," and just before Addison reached the door, Ava said, "Mom?"
"Yeah babe?" She asked turning around.
"I love you."
"I love you too."
Ava Shepherd headed down the stairs near the 4th floor nurse's station. She was dressed in Seven jeans, Christian Loboutain 4-inch heels and a shirt under a lamb's wool leather jacket. She walked, talked, looked, and smelled like money. Her long chestnut locks were slightly curled and pulled back away from her face. As she passed the nurse's station, Meredith and Cristina were still standing there and Ava shot Meredith a look that was very cool, not angry at all, but one that said, "Stay away from my family." And then she went in search of Derek finding him in front of the OR board not too long after.
"Dad?"
Derek turned, "Ava." He looked at his daughter. She looked like Addison, dressed like Addison, had her drive and determination. And yet, the person standing before him was not their child, not biologically speaking in any case. But years of being Addison Shepherd's daughter gave Ava her own unique spark.
"Do you have a minute? I thought we could talk."
"Yeah," Derek replied and led her into an empty room. "So you're here in Seattle."
"I'm here in Seattle because someone thought I needed to be."
"Your mother?"
"No, actually Jackson did. He's a pretty good father. Unlike some people," Ava said, the last words coming under her breath.
"Ava please don't start this again."
"Fine then, I won't. But just answer me this…Did you mean it?"
"What are you talking about?"
"The day you married mom, you and me and mom all made promises to each other." Ava paused. "You told me that no matter what the family court judge said about the adoption that you would always be my father and that Addison would always be my mother. And above all, we would be a family forever. Forever dad, for the rest of our lives regardless of Kate or anyone else, did you really mean what you said? Or were those just temporary promises made to keep a little girl happy?"
"Ava…"
"Answer me."
"Ava please…"
"Answer me!"
"Yes I meant them."
"Then what are you doing? What are you doing here? Having a midlife crisis of some kind?"
"I'm not discussing this with you Ava. You're too young to understand this," he said before moving to leave the room.
"She's old enough to be my sister!"
"Ava that's enough!"
"I don't know you anymore. You're not the father that you were in New York. You've changed. You've become like my friends dads, they stopped caring about their families too, started to date younger women young enough to be their daughters or daughter's sisters. But when all of my friends complained to me, I always felt lucky because I knew my father wasn't like that. But I was wrong. You're just like them."
"I moved on after I left New York Ava. I won't apologize for that."
"Yes, you moved on dad. But unlike Meredith Grey, who I saw by the way….she's very…" Ava paused searching for the right word. "Cute in a naive sort of way, she reminds me of so many girls I know in New York. They all want to be successful and they worship our professors like Gods. In the eyes of those girls and in the eyes of Meredith Grey, they see right past their flaws and see men that really only exist in dreams. And by doing that, they become distracted, just like Meredith is distracted by you and she doesn't need distraction. She's trying to become a better doctor, just as I am trying to become a better dancer, a better friend, and perhaps most importantly a better daughter."
"My relationship with Meredith is none of your concern. What is going on is between Meredith, your mother and I."
"Oh so you're into threesomes now?"
"This conversation is over," Derek said going for the door.
Ava grabbed his arm, "You have a choice to make. You can choose Mom or Meredith. But if you choose Meredith Grey you lose me. You divorce Mom, you divorce me too."
And without waiting for an answer, Ava left the room and took the elevator down to the lobby. She sat in one of the chairs in the lobby to wait for her mother. It was all so surreal now, this thing between her parents. Now they were just like all the other parents she knew and she like all the kids she knew. And it sucked.
Addison made her way down to the lobby to meet Ava when a voice stopped her.
"Addison," said Richard Webber coming up behind one of his favorite surgeons.
"Richard," Addison replied turning around. "I was looking for you. I'm sorry about today," she said the last quietly. "This day has just been…."
"I know Addison. But we all have those days and you can't go around making a scene in front of your peers."
"I can't compete with that, not with her. It's all too much," She paused. "He loves her plain and simple."
"Derek thinks he loves Meredith Addison. It takes time to truly love someone like I have seen him love you."
"It's not enough."
Richard took her hand, "We make promises in this life Addison, promises that are forever and that doesn't just go away overnight. But in your case they never will."
"What do you mean?"
"Yesterday, I received a call from Jackson Abrams. He asked me about you and Derek and if it was safe to send Ava out here. I told him yes of course."
"Jackson called you? Why didn't he call us?"
"Ava wouldn't have wanted him to," he said and then looked at her, "Ava missed you more than she'll ever admit."
"I know. But what does this have to do with Derek loving Meredith?"
"Derek has a family with you; he made a promise to you that he can never take back."
"He's trying to."
"But he won't. I think that daughter of yours gave him a nice hard dose of reality. Now go on, enjoy your evening with Ava. I'll see you in the morning."
"Thanks."
Addison walked down to the main lobby and found Ava sitting in a chair facing away from her.
"Ava?" Addison said coming over to her daughter and putting a hand on her shoulder.
"Hey," Ava said looking up at her mother. "Are you ready to go?"
"Yeah "
Ava rose and they walked out of the hospital together.
The next evening at the SGH "Prom" Ava stood over to the side dressed in a floor length royal blue gown with silver and white detailing on the skirt and bodice. She had helped Bailey and the rest of the interns plan for tonight as a favor to the Chief and now she was quite content to watch the fruits of her labor. She was particularly interested in watching her parents as they danced together. It gave her a flicker of hope that perhaps maybe her father was finally getting something. But that hope was dashed a few seconds later when Ava saw her father was staring longingly at Meredith and that Meredith was looking over her date's shoulder returning the look, but very uneasily. When Meredith bolted a few minutes later, Ava was hot on her heels and while Derek wanted to follow he knew he couldn't.
Ava knocked tentatively on the door of the exam room which Meredith had fled into, "Dr. Grey?" She opened the door. "Sorry to disturb you. But can we talk?"
Meredith turned to her and was about to say no, but something in Ava's eyes made Meredith change her mind, "Yeah."
Ava slipped inside and closed the door, "I wanted to apologize for yesterday. I just---I didn't like seeing my mom so upset."
"It was a natural instinct, I understand. If that was my mother I don't know if I would like it either."
"And I also wanted to say that I'm sorry about your dog. That sucks."
"Thanks."
"I saw you out there dancing with the vet. Do you like him?"
Meredith stopped at looked at Ava before responding, "Yes."
"Dr. Grey…"
"Please, call me Meredith. Dr. Grey is too formal for this conversation."
"Sorry, I guess I'm just so used to being formal with everyone." She paused. "Has my Dad told you anything about my family?"
"He told me that he has four sisters. But other than that nothing."
"When I was six years-old, my mother packed up some of my stuff and put me in the car, in the middle of the night. We were living in Toronto at the time and when I woke up the next morning, we were in New York. She left me with Derek and Addison and didn't come back for almost a year."
"Who is your mother?"
"Derek's older sister Kate is my biological mother. There's about five years between them. She got into drugs and alcohol in her teens. My grandparents tried everything, but nothing helped. And then she met my dad and they had me which I guess was a good thing. But my mom left my dad one day and took me with her."
"So how did you go from being Derek's niece to his daughter?"
"Long story short, my mom left me with Derek and Addison because I was abused by her boyfriend and after a year they decided to keep me."
"Just like that?"
"In a nutshell."
"What about your real father?"
"I didn't see him again until a couple of years ago. He's nice though and I have two half brothers."
"Wow, I had no idea."
"There's more."
"More?"
Ava nodded, "My parents and I were happy I guess until about a year and half ago."
"What happened?"
"My mom she---" Ava paused and looked down at the floor as images flooded her brain. "She had a miscarriage, a late miscarriage. It was pretty bad…..After my parents both threw themselves into work to try and avoid the pain. They wanted that baby so badly. I think that's when things changed. My parents grew apart, my dad was working more. I had just started at NYU so they didn't have to worry about me."
"And that's when Mark happened?"
"Yes and now we're here. You, the girl who fell in love with a charming but married brain surgeon and me the daughter of the charming but married brain surgeon."
"Why did you tell me all of this?"
"Because you deserve information in order to make an informed decision, my dad wants it both ways. But he can't have you and my mom both." Ava looked at Meredith, "There is a saying that if you truly love someone you will let them go. My mom has let him be with you and will let him go the moment he asks…."
"Because she loves him that much…."
Ava nodded, "Yes. I should go, I've kept you too long," she said and then started for the door.
"Ava?"
"Yes Meredith?"
"Thanks for telling me the truth."
"You're welcome," and with that Ava was gone.
"Where did you go off to tonight?" Addison asked her daughter as they entered Ava's hotel suite at the Four Seasons. Addison had never made it, due to being called away by Adele Webber the night before.
"I just went to get some air that's all," Ava said removing her shoes and sitting on the bed.
"Oh. Daddy told me that you two talked yesterday."
"Did he?"
"He said you were pretty harsh."
"I was honest, there's a difference."
"Ava, no matter what happens, we will still be a family I promise you that."
"I know. But Daddy hasn't tried to do anything. He's obcessed with Dr. Grey instead of trying to work things out."
"Maybe he is. But Ava, it's your father's choice to make."
"I told Meredith the truth."
"The truth?"
"About the baby."
"Ava!"
"I had no choice! Daddy ran away from the pain. But you didn't, at first maybe, but then you went to a therapist."
"I did. But Meredith didn't need to know that!"
"She needed to know the truth about what was really going on. Relationships are not built on lies."
"Ava…"
"It's true!"
"You need to let it go. Your father has some decisions to make and he has to make them alone. I can't help him anymore and neither can you. If he chooses Meredith then so be it, I will give him a divorce."
"Mom…"
"If he really wants out then who am I to stop him?" Addison looked at her daughter who was now sitting on the bed facing away from her.
"Ava," she said sitting on the bed and putting her arms around her daughter, "I love your father very much. But if he doesn't want to continue this marriage, then I won't. I want him to be happy; I want you to be happy."
"Are you?"
"I will be once we can all move forward."
There was a knock on the door and Ava stood up, "I'll get it." She went to the door and found her father on the other side.
"Dad…"
"Ava, is your mom here?"
"Yeah," she said moving aside so Derek could come inside.
"Derek," Addison said rising.
"I'll just go in the other room," Ava said quickly excusing herself and going into another room before closing the door.
"I tried to look for you after the interns left."
"I thought you'd want some time alone, so I decided to come back here with Ava."
Derek nodded, "Addison?"
"Yeah?"
"I've made my decision."
"You have?" Addison asked suddenly feeling nervous.
"Yes I have." He paused. "I thought about what Ava said to me yesterday and I'm not willing to sacrifice my family for something that I haven't made right."
"So what are you saying?"
"I'm saying that I want to stay married to you, to have babies with you, to grow old with you. I want all of that. I want to keep the promises we made to each other and to our family."
"Derek are you sure? I can't take any more indecision."
"I'm as sure as I was the day I married you," he said and then he kissed her. Addison kissed him back and then she pulled away, "What, what is it?"
"I have one condition."
"And what is that?"
"I think it's about time we went into family therapy."
"Are you sure that's wise?"
"Relationships cannot be built on lies Derek."
"No. No they can't," he smiled and then kissed her cheek before whispering, "Thank you."
"For what?"
"Staying until it passed."
"I promised you that I would because that is what a good wife does."
"We're working on it."
"We are indeed," Addison said as a small smile crossed her face. "Ava you can come out now."
The door to the other room opened and Ava came out, "What's the verdict?" She said coolly."
Derek stood up and crossed over to her, "I meant what I said yesterday Ava."
"Did you?"
"Family comes first," He said kissing her forehead. "Thank you for reminding me of that."
"Anytime," Ava replied a small grin crossing her face.
I hope you all enjoyed this little excursion. Please R/R!