Garfieldodie: Truly, I don't know whether the tornado is just a fantasy or not. Nobody will believe him when it's all finished, though. Of corse

Previously on Calvin and Hobbes:

Weather Man: Today, on X-treme weather, Tornados. How to escape them. And how to know when one is approaching! NEXT!

Calvin: There hasn't been a tornado here since nineteen-fifty-something!

Hobbes: There's a twister coming!

Calvin: UPSTAIRS!

(Calvin pulls box out of the closet)

Hobbes: I think I'll take my chances with the tornado.

Calvin: Get in the box! There's only one way to stop this thing!

(Tornado wheels toward Calvin and Hobbes' box)

Calvin: help. Cry for help.

And now back to Calvin and Hobbes: The Series

The Black Turning Funnel

Part two

"Hobbes!" Calvin screamed at Hobbes. "I have a confession to make!"

"What's that, Calvin?" Hobbes shouted, as the tornado ever so quickly approached them.

"I knew what you were saying on the roof all the time!" Calvin called.

Hobbes felt a strong urge to strangle Calvin right there, but decided not too.

"Calvin, I rolled up your Captain Napalm comic, and used it to clean out my ears!"

"What!" Calvin screamed in anger. "My First Edition Captain Napalm book!"

Just then, with a whoosh, Calvin and Hobbes hit the tornado with full force.

POW!

"AAAAAA!" Calvin and Hobbes screamed as the tornado made the box spin out of control.

Calvin grabbed the boosters, and hit the FULL THROTTLE button.

The rockets kicked in, and Calvin and Hobbes attempted to escape the tornado.

The boom of the engine was droned out by the roaring of the tornado.

Calvin tried to steer the box.

It swerved ever so slightly.

Just then, you won't believe this, Just then... It disappeared!

That's right! The tornado just was sucked back into the clouds!

Calvin and Hobbes stared up at the dark clouds in shock.

"Well, that was easy." Calvin said.

"No, look!" Hobbes yelled.

Calvin turned around.

The tornado was still there! It was just in another spot!

"Forget what I said about easy." Calvin mumbled.

"OK! Plan B!"

Calvin pushed the box forward at full speed.

And he zoomed toward the tornado.

"Calvin, we just left the tornado." Hobbes said. "Why are you going back to i— AAAAAAAA!"

With a sharp turn Calvin circled the tornado with a blast of speed behind him.

Calvin circled the tornado as fast as the box would go.

Calvin and Hobbes stared at a cow flying pass them.

"Ok." Calvin said.

"There goes another one." Hobbes said.

Another cow passed the box.

"No, I think that was the same one." Calvin said.

Then Calvin saw something else.

Totally oblivious to what was going on, some guy pedaled his bicycle around the tornado.

Calvin and Hobbes stared at him.

"Well." Hobbes said. "All this needs, now, is the Wizard of Oz song."

"Shall I sing it for you?" Calvin asked.

"No." Hobbes said.

Calvin continued to circle the tornado.

"Calvin, I think your idea is working!" Hobbes said.

Calvin looked up.

Indeed, as he continued to round it, it became thinner.

After about a minute, everything calmly stopped.

"Well." Calvin said. "We've saved our home from total havoc."

"What about everybody else?" Hobbes asked.

"Uh... Yeah. Them too."

Suddenly, the clouds started to rumble again.

Calvin and Hobbes looked up.

"TORNADOS!" Calvin and Hobbes both screamed.

"TornadoS!" Hobbes said. "Plural!"

Indeed, right before their very eyes, over twenty tornados formed, and hit several spots around the area.

"It would appear my idea doesn't work." Calvin said, grinning, sheepishly.

Hobbes gave Calvin a menacing glare.

Just then, another tornado fell on top of them.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Calvin and Hobbes blazed, as they started to zoom across the sky.

All at once, Calvin and Hobbes were seeing things they never expected to see flying through the air.

Things such as: A windmill, a car, a dozen chickens, several trees, and a refrigerator.

And you know, when you start seeing flying chickens, you know there's something wrong.

Oh did I mention the hawks? Yes. Two hawks. They were sitting in one of the trees nearby.

One of them stared at Calvin and Hobbes.

"Son? Junior? You'd best wake up, son, I'm a-seeing some strange things in the air."

"What?"

"I said, wake up, Junior, 'cause all at once, I'm seeing boxes flying around our tree."

"Boxes? Is that what you said, Pa?"

"That's right, son, a box is flying around our tree. And there's a kid and a tiger in it, wearing swimming goggles."

"Oh, you're just dreaming, Pa. Go back to sleep."

"I'm not dreaming, Junior. There's a box swooping around our tree."

Junior looked up.

"Oh my gosh!"

"Do ya see 'em, son? Tell me, because otherwise, I'm going insane."

"Oh my gosh! Yes, I see them."

"A box? You see 'em? Oh thank goodness, I thought I had lost my marbles for a second there."

"Yep. A box with a kid and a cat in it."

The older Hawk, Wallace, was his name, twisted his head around, and stared at Calvin and Hobbes.

He gave them a hateful glare.

"What are you doing flying around our tree at this time of night like a bunch of I-Know-Whats!"

"Well, Wallace," Calvin said. "It would appear that we're in a tornado."

Wallace and Junior gave Calvin a blank stare.

"Hello? Any body home? Tor-na-do. noun. A powerful storm that can swoop things off the ground."

"Kid, If I want a weather report, I'll ask a groundhog. What are you doing up here?"

"I just told you, moron! We're in a tornado!" Calvin yelled.

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. I'm not in a tornado. I'm on my cottonwood tree!"

"Yeah, and your cottonwood tree just happens to be flying around in a Black Turning Funnel!" Calvin replied.

"No It isn't."

"Yes it is!" Calvin spat. "And if you don't believe me..."

Just then, a cow floated past

"If you don't believe me, maybe you'd like to talk about flying cows."

Wallace's eyes popped open, and he turned to Junior.

"Son, you talk to him. All I can make out is that there's a storm somewhere."

"Well, I think he said that we got swooped up into tornado."

"A tornado? You mean a cyclone? A terrible swirling storm?"

"Yeah, only it's called a tornado." Junior said.

"No it's not. It's a cyclone! That's what my granddaddy called it. and that's what it IS- A cyclone."

Junior rolled his eyes.

"Uh, Ok. Pa. It's a cyclone. But whatever it is, we're stuck in it."

"Well why didn't the kid just say so?"

"I think he did, Pa."

"No he didn't! He was jabbering about ground hogs and milk cows."

"Well, you don't see any ground under our tree, do you?" Junior asked.

Wallace looked down.

"No, I sure don't." He said. "and you know, I told you we should watch those clouds up there. That they looked pretty bad."

"No you didn't." Junior said. "Because you fell right off to sleep."

"Well, it sure passed through my mind!" Wallace snarled.

"These two are really boring me, now." Calvin said.

He hit the BLAST OF SMOKE button, and zoomed out of the tornado.

BOOM!

Calvin and Hobbes exited the cyclone. or Tornado. Whatever it was.

"Alright." Calvin said. "We need to find some way to save the town before the tornados..."

"Cyclones." Hobbes said.

"Whatever. Before the somethings destroys everything!"

"How are we going to do that?" Hobbes asked.

Calvin stared off into space for a very long time, trying to think up a plan.

"I've got it!" He grinned.

He jerked the box around, and bolted back for home.

As soon as Calvin got home, he jumped out of the box, and ran into the house.

Hobbes was left sitting in the box.

He looked up at the tor-cyclone-ados.

One of them was coming up. FAST.

"Calvin you better hurry up in there!"

Calvin ran back outside. He was carrying a small water pistol.

"What are you doing now?" Hobbes sighed.

Calvin laughed like a maniac, and pointed his transfigoromer gun at the tornado.

But before he shot it, the tornado lifted him, and Hobbes into the air.

"AA!" Calvin yelled.

His mind raced, as he flew from Mother Earth, and started beating around the tor-whatever.

What was he going to turn it into? HE COULDN'T REMEMBER!

Calvin thought quickly. He shifted throughout his imagination, and picked the very first thing he thought of.

-ZAP!-

The tornado vanished.

Calvin opened his eyes.

It was then that he realized that he was fifty feet in the air.

"AAAAAA!" Calvin screamed as he crashed to the ground.

Hobbes landed softly next to him in the box.

"What did you turn it into?" Hobbes asked.

Calvin pointed at the ground.

Hobbes looked down, there was a whirl wind swirling across the ground.

"Ah." Hobbes said. "You shrank it."

With a WHOOSH, Calvin swiped his hand through the wind, and scattered it up.

"That leaves fifty nine." Hobbes said.

"No problem!" Calvin grinned.

He pointed his gun into the sky at the dark clouds.

-ZAP!-

The clouds parted up, and all the tornados shrank down.

Overhead, the two hawks flew off.

Calvin heard Wallace say, "Ground hogs, flying boxes and cyclones! What kind of place is this? Come on, Junior, We're a-leaving!"

As soon as all the clouds parted, the sun show through again, and the bright day returned.

"Well." Calvin said. "All is as it should be."

"Almost." Hobbes said, pointing.

Calvin looked around.

YIKES!

The cow, dozen chickens, goats, geese, horses and other farm animals that Calvin's neighbors had were ALL IN CALVIN'S FRONT YARD!

All of them landed in Calvin's yard!

To make matters worse, Mom and Dad were returning from the super market.

They got out of the car.

They stared at wide-eyed Calvin.

They stared at the farm animals.

They stared back at Calvin.

There was a long moment of silence.

"Might I add that I just saved the town from a bunch of terrible tornados?"

We needn't go details.

All I'll say is that Calvin lost his TV and comic book privileges for a month.

Oh, and Calvin had to apologize to their farmer neighbor, for "coaxing the animals in his yard for total unknown reasons."

"Ya know Hobbes?" Calvin snarled slamming the door to his room. "I despise people! And the next time a tornado hits, I'm not going to anything about it! Let the stupid adults figure out how make a transfigoramer gun! I quit!"

"Still," Hobbes said, putting his comic down. "It's a good thing you got rid of them. And really, everything worked out. The monsters are back under the bed, and the tornados are gone... Um Right?"

Calvin gave Hobbes a thoughtful glare.

"It must be very peaceful in Hobbes world." He said.

Hobbes rolled his eyes.

"On the other hand, maybe you should have just let the tornado hit the house, and destroy everything."

Calvin rolled his eyes skyward.

"Torndos! Tornados! Tornados!" He yelled. "That's all I've heard since this morning! Doesn't it ever stop?"

"Well," Calvin said, changing the subject. "It's bedtime. Shall we get to bed?"

Hobbes looked outside.

It was still light out.

But when Calvin was in this mood, you better do as he says.

Calvin crawled into bed, and switched the light off, still grumbling.

There was a moment of silence.

"Calvin are you awake?" Hobbes asked.

"Murk snork. Not if I can help it."

"I was just thinking. Remember that dream I had this morning? It was about a funnel, remember? We actually saw and fought against a funnel! A Black Turning Funnel! Gosh! Do you think I can see into the future?"

Calvin lifted his head, and stared at Hobbes.

"Hobbes," he said. "one of the great challenges of life is trying to distinguish between prophecy and indigestion. Yours is indigestion. Good night."

"It's the middle of the day." Hobbes said.

"Shut up." Calvin spat.

And with that, Calvin fell asleep and ended another exciting adventure in the Calvin and Hobbes household.

The End

Voice work:

Pamela Segal: Calvin

Tom Hanks: Hobbes

Bill Murray: Dad

Jennifer Love Hewitt: Mom

Tom Kenny: Monsters

Dee Bradley Baker: Miscellaneous voice work

Coming up Next: The Time Pauser