"I believe in you." (Janeway, EMH, Zimmerman)

Author's Note: This story includes a reference to Star Trek: Prodigy, but can be understood even if you haven't seen the show. I've only seen the first episode so far, and some of my predictions may turn out to be wrong, but knowing the characters, this is what I believe could have happened.

/

"No need to thank me," said Dr. Zimmerman smugly. "I realize what an honour this must be, but don't worry, you'll be more than adequate for the role."

Kathryn, who had been speechless for a good half minute, shook herself out of that state and said: "Tell me you're joking."

They were speaking over a comm link, Zimmerman from his laboratory on Jupiter Station and Kathryn from her family's home in the country outside Bloomington. The contrast between where she was sitting, on the porch swing with her feet tucked up and her padd in one hand, and Zimmerman's sterile-looking lab with its hologrid walls, couldn't have been more obvious. It made the project he was talking about sound even more bizarre.

"I beg your pardon?" Zimmerman huffed.

"HQ wants me to be the model for your next hologram? That sounds like one of your practical jokes if I ever heard one."

"I never joke about my work," Zimmerman said sourly. "If there's any reason why you wouldn't want your hard-earned experience to help the next generation of cadets survive the Delta Quadrant, by all means, enlighten me."

Kathryn gritted her teeth. He had a point. Starfleet was developing a transwarp drive and would be sending a prototype vessel, the Protostar, to the Delta Quadrant to follow up on Voyager's explorations. The next generation was going to need all the help they could get, and she would have done a great deal for them … but why did it have to be this?

"I could point out that not all of us feel the urge to put a copy of ourselves on every Starfleet vessel … "

"Eh!"

"But, more importantly, how can you make sure these holograms won't be exploited?"

Her old self would never have thought to ask this, but that was before she'd learned to think of Voyager's EMH as a friend. She understood - as much as an organic could, anyway - how vulnerable a hologram could be. The idea of a version of herself being at the mercy of engineers, even well-intentioned ones, made her uneasy.

"Ah yes, an excellent question," a younger, brisker echo of Zimmerman's voice said from off-screen. "That's where I come in. Hello, Admiral."

"Hello, Doctor."

Kathryn couldn't help smiling a little as the Doctor appeared on camera - not just because she was glad to see him, but because of how he and Zimmerman looked together. The programmer's hair had gone white and wispy, his wrinkles deepened and his shoulders stooped since the first time she'd met him, but the Doctor looked exactly as he always did. The resemblance between them had stopped being uncanny and now made them look like father and son. The casual way the Doctor leaned over the back of Zimmerman's chair only added to the impression.

"I'm a consultant on this project," the hologram said proudly. "And I promise to do my utmost to ensure that the Janeways will have as much autonomy as possible. They'll be able to activate and deactivate themselves at will, they'll have holoemitters all over the ship, and the strongest firewalls that Lewis can come up with to protect them from being hacked. Believe me, I know how that feels and I wouldn't wish it on anyone."

"Hmm … " Kathryn frowned, but she had to admit that those measures reassured her a little. Being confined to one room or disappearing into a void had always seemed like the worst parts of being a self-aware hologram. "Still," she argued, "I don't see why your model has to be me. Surely there's someone else more … suitable."

"Really? After everything you've accomplished?" Zimmerman raised an eyebrow. Somehow the man could make even a compliment sound sarcastic.

"Let me talk to her, Lewis," said the Doctor, giving his creator a condescending pat on the shoulder. "I'm the one who served with her for seven years."

Zimmerman let out another derisive "Eh!", heaved himself to his feet with a tired grunt and shuffled away. There was the swish of a door sliding shut off-camera.

The Doctor took his place in the chair, clasped his hands on the desk in front of him, and gave Kathryn the same sort of wry, knowing look he used to wear whenever she made up excuses for putting off her physical.

"Can he still hear us?"

"No."

"All right." She sighed. "Doctor, you of all people should know why I can't be the model, especially for a training advisor. I've made so many mistakes."

The Doctor gave a little nod, as if he'd expected this. They knew each other too well.

"You certainly did," he said, with a look as kind as his tone was acerbic. "But as I said to Seven of Nine once, perfection is a laudable goal, but hardly realistic. If we were looking for a perfect officer to use as a model, we'd be looking forever. An officer like you, though … one who can take a group of wildly different people from all sides of the galaxy and helped them become a crew … well, I believe in you, Admiral. And so will the cadets, if given the chance."

He smiled at her with sudden warmth, palpable even through the tiny screen of the padd. Kathryn didn't know where to look. She had been praised - and blamed - by all sorts of people in the most hyperbolic terms ever since she'd brought Voyager home and done her best to keep it in perspective, but the opinions of her shipmates meant a lot to her. If the Doctor, who had seen her in some of her darkest moments, still believed in her, who was she to argue?

"Fine," she said gruffly, clearing her throat and blinking hard. "I'll be your model."

"Thank you."

"But I expect to be consulted."

"Of course."

"And Doctor, one more thing … " She swung back and forth a little on the porch swing, letting it creak from side to side. "Don't make them too much like me, will you? Don't give them my memories. It would only make them homesick."

The porch was built at the back of an old wooden farmhouse that dated back to the nineteenth century. A red maple tree grew beside it, and corn fields waved from the opposite side of the road. In her mother's flowerbed, the last roses were blooming, along with so many tiny white clusters of alyssum that they looked like a living cloud. Toy gardening tools, a miniature plastic shovel and watering can, were scattered in the grass where Phoebe's children had left them. Sometimes, even after so many years, she still couldn't believe she was really here.

No version of herself should have to remember this and lose it. Not again.

"I wouldn't do that," said the Doctor. "And if that's you lurking behind the door, Lewis, tell her you won't either."

"Lurking? I was being discreet." Lewis stuck his head into the frame, bumping the Doctor's chair sideways in order to do so. "And I never make complete copies, you should know that. The Janeways will think and act like you, not be you. Did you ever see Junior here feeling homesick for this lab while you were on Voyager?"

"I wouldn't have, even with your memories," the Doctor grumbled. "This place is a zoo."

A housefly buzzed around their heads as if to prove him right. He swatted it with one hand.

"Fair enough," said Kathryn, in answer to Zimmerman's explanation. "I understand."

"By the way, Admiral," said the programmer, with a sideways look at his creation. "You needn't worry too much about the mistakes you've made."

So he had been eavesdropping. Kathryn swallowed several unprofessional remarks and contented herself with giving him her iciest glare. It had stopped Kazon, Vidiians and even the Borg Queen in their tracks, but it hardly made him blink.

"After all," he said, with a very familiar crooked smirk, "My greatest mistake is sitting right next to me and he literally saved my life."

"Believe it or not, Admiral," said the Doctor, with an identical smirk on his holographic face, "That's the closest thing to a compliment he's ever given me."

"Don't get used to it, Junior."

Whatever else one might say about working with these two, Kathryn thought, it would certainly be a challenge, and she was always ready for those. Besides, Zimmerman's remark about mistakes had given her a lot to think about.

Maybe, she thought, taking courage, maybe she was the right model after all.