He had never gotten over it... the fact that she was going to have someone else's cub. It wasn't that odd in the tribe to take care of lifemate's cub, although you weren't the parent. But still...usually it was in a situation that one or both of the parents had died. Scouter just couldn't handle the thought that she, his lovemate had recognized someone else and was having another elf's cub. This just wasn't right. Scouter had promised to be father to the unborn cub of Dewshine and Tyldak but did he really want that. And what if this child has those ugly wings like his father has.

Scouter through a stone into the river and watched, how broke the surface of the silently flowing water. The sun was getting down and he could hear the noises of his cheaf, Cutter, who was returning from a hunting trip with some other tribe members. Cutter had asked Scouter to join them but the young elf hadn't felt like it. He had left Dewshine with Nightfall and came to the river to be with his thoughts.

"Everything all right, my friend?" said a familiar voice behind Scouter and without looking behind him, answered:

"Yes, Cutter...or I don't know...I don't know what to think or do."

Cutter took a seat next to Scouter. "Anything I can do to help?"

"Well..tell me...if Leetah had Rayek's cub, could you be the father to it knowing that she'd been pairing with your

enemy?" Scouter took a deep breath and continued when Cutter didn't answer. "I sometimes feel like an idiot. I promised to be the father so that Dewshine could be happy, but what about my happiness and feelings. I know she needs me but I just can't...Cutter, I have no idea what I should do!"

"Calm down. Have you told Dewshine about how you feel?"

"Of course not! She'd be devastated. And I really don't wanna hurt her in any way." Scouter pressed his head against his hands and let out a sigh full of frustation.

"If you lie, you'll hurt her more, and yourself. If you want to take care of Tyldak's child, you don't have to. The tribe have taken care of every child that has grown up without one or two parents."

"Thank you, chief."

"Anytime, my friend. Now come, let's go back to the tribe." They stood up, hugged and walked back into the forest and to their friends.

"Where have you been, Scouter?" asked Dewshine worried as she saw her lovemate.

"I was by the river." answered Scouter avoiding the eyes of Dewshine.

"Again? Is something bothering you, my love? You've been acting strangely lately?"

"It's nothing, really. You go to sleep now, you need to rest." he said still not looking at her face. She grabbed his arm pulling him close and pushing her body against him in a seductive way.

"I was thinking that you'd come with me to our little hole." Dewshine whispered in his ear with her sweet voice. But Scouter pushed her gently away. "Not tonight. You go to sleep, I'll come later." he said and walked away. Dewshine stood there, tears in her eyes and she then disappeared into a tree hole.

Days passed and it ws always like that. Scouter tried to avoid Dewshine, who again tried to be as close to him as possible. The other tribe members had noticed the change in those two, who once were inseparable. Scouter became more tense and Dewshine sadder.

"What's wrong with you two?" asked Moonshine who was also worried.

"I don't know!" cried Dewshine. "He's avoiding me, doesn't talk to me and he doesn't even sleep in the same hole with me. I really don't know what's going on!"

"There there. Clearbrook should talk to him. It's her son anyway." Moonshine hugged the shaking, crying elf girl.

"Cutter, I'm leaving. I have to get away and be on my own. Maybe that'll clear up my head and heart."

The chief turned around and looked at Scouter with disbelief on his face. "Are you serious? You think that is the way of solving everything?"

"I don't know if it'll change anything but at this rate here...I can't take it, and Dewshine neither. I'm gonna tell her tonight before I'm going."

"Well then, I won't keep you but are you sure you don't want anyone to come with you? Just to make sure that nothing happens."

"No. I need to go alone. You know me, I'll be fine and I'll be back."

"Is that a promise?"

"Trust me, I will come back."

Cutter put his hand the elf's shoulder. "Then be well, my friend and be careful. And whatever you need to find, I hope you'll find it so that you can return to us."

"Thank you, my chief."

The old friends were smiling, although they knew that the other was leaving, maybe never returning. They had gone through a lot and knew each other well. One last hug and Scouter ran back to his tree hole to pack. Dewshine had been standing in hiding, hearing this conversation and was shocked. Scouter was leaving the tribe, leaving her, his pregnant lovemate. She ran after Scouter, mad and disappointed and wanting to know everything. This time he wouldn't have a chance to escape from her questions.

--------

"What is this? You're leaving the tribe without telling me?" Scouterturned around and saw Dewshine crying at the doorway of their small tree home. "How did you..."

"I heard you and Cutter talking and you said you were leaving. Why?"

"Well thank you for respecting my privacy." he said angry. He definitely didn't like someone listening his conversations.

"I had to! You don't talk to me about anything anymore!" Dewshine fell on her knees and hid her face in her hands. Scouter sat on a bench and sighed. "I know, I'm sorry. I you really listened to our conversation, I said that I was going to talk to you tonight. The thing is...after you recognized Tildak...everything changed. I said I would be the cub's father, but...I can't, I really can't."

She looked at him in anger. "What? It's not like chose him and you know it. Recognision is recognision! You can't fight against it!"

"Then you should have stayed together with him!" Silence fell into the room as they both boiled in anger and disappointment. "Dewshine, my friend," he kneeled in front of her. "we've come a long way and we have been through so much. But please understand me. You having a child that is not mine...it wasn't what I had in mind for us. Let me go, as a friend and let me solve my feelings. We can't feel happiness like this and it'll just break us both. Please, don't hate me for this." Dewshine didn't say a word. He gave a kiss on her forehead and stood up. He took a last look on the hole, then grabbed his bag and walked out. Behind him he could hear how Dewshine broke in tears. For a second he felt like turning back, just to comfort his crying friend. But the will of going was stronger.

Outside everyone of the tribe was waiting for him.

"We just wanted to say goodbye." said Scouter's mother, Clearbrook. She had come to him the day before after Nightfall had asked her to talk to her son. She had understood Souter's feelings and she was the one who said that maybe he should take some time apart and think about things.

Scouter's tribesmates watched how he sat on his wolf and slowly walked away. His heart felt heavy and tears were in his eyes. With the sun shining on his back, without turning his head, Scouter disappeared into the thick forest.

"Is Scouter ever coming back?" asked Ember, who was clinging to her mother's arm. "Yes, I believe so." said Leetah with her comforting, soft voice. "We don't know when but yes, I'm sure he'll come back." Slowly the wolfriders went back to their lives, like nothing had changed. Nightfall climbed up to the hole, where Dewshine was still crying.

"Scouter, I hope this was really the right to do." Nightfall thought as she held the shaking Dewshine in her arms.