AN: So this is chapter 16. Another flashback, short chapter. Set after chapter 9, but before chapter 14. So her and Leo have broken up by now, she's not pregnant yet.
Warning: References to drugs in this chapter. Nothing extremely graphic though.
Flashing lights.
Pounding bass line.
Sweaty teenage bodies cramped into a small space.
Just another party.
Just another night.
It was always the same. Always the freaking same. Every single night, that's just the way it was now. I far, sorrowful cry from her innocence. And she cared, more than she let people know. More than anyone could know. Everybody thought she liked her new life, even she didn't. Everybody except one person.
Leo Wyatt.
He saw through the act she put on everyday. He saw right though it all. Just like he had seen through the glasses, braces and bad clothes. The way he'd seen her when she was invisible to everyone else. He was the only one who ever could.
And his words haunted her.
There's a problem here!
There's a problem here!
There's a problem here!
There's a problem here!
They echoed in her mind, almost painfully rattling around. She couldn't forget. So she drank to help her forget. She partied to help her forget. She spent more time with Dan to forget. And when that didn't work she just doubled her effort.
It wasn't working and she knew it. But maybe if she tried long enough, she'd be numb enough to forget.
"Hey baby" She felt Dan's hands grip her from behind and began to kiss her neck. Leo used to do this to her.
But with Dan she felt no love, or warmth. All she felt was iron grips, almost painful. She felt raw sex and she felt cold hard kisses. She hated it. But she didn't ever say no.
If she said she'd be alone. She'd have nobody. And that scared her. She knew that she didn't feel anything real for Dan. He was just another body to keep her from being really and truly alone. If she was with him, she wasn't alone.
But she was.
She had just lost the one person who had always been there for her. She had just lost the best thing in her life. She had given up on him. It was all her fault. And she knew it. If she couldn't have Leo then maybe this… this thing she had with Dan was the next best thing.
"Hey." She answered him, trying to move away from him, but he tightened his grip even further and continued with the hard aggressive kisses.
She didn't even try to fight them.
"You get anything tonight?" He asked and she knew what he meant. She shook her head. He raised his left eyebrow at her and spun her around. "Really?" He questioned again.
"No, not tonight." She said and his grip tightened again till it almost hurt. And not in a good way. He grabbed her hand and shoved it hard into his back pocket, so she felt a plastic bag. Her eyes grew wide as she pulled it out and she saw white powder.
"Go on." He said and pushed her into the nearest wall.
"Dan…" she started but that was when she saw his pupils. They were dilated and unfocused. There was no point talking to him when he was like this. They was no point talking to him anytime. His breathing quickened and she could smell the alcohol strong on his breath.
She closed her eyes and nodded, he pulled them into the bathroom around the corner and his hands roamed her body, they were hard against her skin. She closed her eyes like she did every time. Not because of pleasure like he thought, but because she was trying to block him out.
.xXx.
Leo had a picture of them on his bedside table. It had been months already and he still hadn't been able to take it down. It would say something about their relationship, something he wasn't ready for. It would say something about the finality of it. And he couldn't do that yet.
So he stared at it. They were so perfect in the picture. Smiling, close to each other, untouchable, infinite.
He had tried to speak to her but every time he did she just walked away. And that hurt. A lot. Almost more than the actual break up did. And he had no friends anymore. No one to fall back onto.
Rick. Nathan. They were both going down the same route as Piper was.
Jamie. Gone. She was just as bad, but around two weeks ago, her mom decided to move them away. Smart woman.
Sure he had friends. But no one he could talk to. That hurt.
Every night he had the same dream. It wasn't going away.
.xXx.
He and Piper, having a picnic in the park. Laughing and joking, having fun. The sun was always bright and the sky was always perfect shade of blue. And then the light would grow unbearably harsh.
Piper would shield her eyes and look up at sun, and he would look at her. The sun carried on getting bright and bright, giving Leo a real view of her. She was thin and unnaturally pale. She got thinner and thinner, paler and paler. He eyes would grow redder and redder. He lips would go grey, followed by her eyes and skin. Her hair wasn't shining. It was dull.
And then she would speak, "Leo…" just his name, and it always came out raspy, like she was dehydrated, "Help me…"
And then everything would plunge to black. He could here laughing. It was Dan's laughter. Then he would hear Rick's voice.
Piper doesn't love you anymore!
.xXx.
And would wake up in a cold sweat.
Nothing was the same any more.
He needed her.
AN: I know, I'm depressing and repetitive. But I promise this story's going to get better. Reviews please.