More fangirls Legolas' doom

I'd just like to thank the people who have reviewed this fanfiction, and to (name) who had Glorfi in a closet, I hope he is recovering well! Anyway, welcome to chapter 3 of this random journey into a fangirl's mind… and feel for Legolas this chapter, he will probably need plenty of therapy… perhaps Glorfi and Leggy can go together?

Disclaimer: I own me, Alanna, this fanfiction and Legolas… (Legolas appears, now fully clothed, bow in hand)

"YOU DO NOT OWN ME!" He yelled. Alanna pouted.

"Ok, maybe I don't… yet. But I'm in discussion with important people for your rights…" Legolas stared at Alanna in horror, then disappeared in a puff of smoke (because he's an elf and he can) and muttering about possible suicide methods.

Alanna walked onto the set, to be greeted by a yelp from Legolas, and stares from everyone else. She looked around at everyone, then frowned. Why were they all giving her weird looks? She shrugged mentally (not realising that the tale of the pillow-stealing had got around the entire cast) and grinned at Legolas.

"Ohiyo Legolas-san!" She said happily. He whimpered and darted behind Merry and Pippin, then realised that neither of them would be much help in shielding him. So, he drew his bow. Alanna stared at him, dismayed. Legolas glared. Aragorn rolled his eyes and walked over to Legolas and whispered in his ear, and Legolas finally put down his bow, giving Alanna very wary looks. Alanna pouted for another moment, then walked towards the camera crew, who all grinned and waved her. Legolas and Aragorn both noticed at the same time – the camera crew consisted entirely of girls. They looked at each other worriedly, and Legolas prayed that his end would be swift. Alanna had a swift talk with the 'camera crew' then walked back over to the cast, who were all now decidedly worried.

"OK guys, lets get started shall we?"

They nodded dubiously, then Pippin piped up, "What scene are we filming?" Alanna blinked, then replied, "I think we should do the scene in Lothlorien, where Legolas-san has the jug thingy. So we don't need you for the moment Gandalf." Gandalf shrugged and disappeared (because he's a wizard and he can). Alanna looked avidly at Legolas, then said, "Legolas-san, that means you have to take off the green tunicy thing, so you're wearing your blue shirt thing." Legolas glanced at the 'camera crew', who had suddenly looked up and were paying a lot of attention at the words "take off" and swallowed. As he reluctantly undid the fastenings, he was greeted by whistles and cheers from the 'camera crew'. He grimaced and dropped the tunic on the floor, and was bowled over by the 'camera crew' as they rushed forwards to grab it. He backed away, but was caught by Alanna. Only then did he realise that she had a manic, obsessive gleam in her eyes. He tried to pull away, but she held on persistently. Legolas swallowed nervously, and tried to pull away again. Alanna clung grimly on, and then reached forwards and struggled to undo the fastenings of the shirt. Legolas' eyes widened and he began yelling for help. Unfortunately, some of the other fangirls had seen what Alanna was trying to do, and came forwards to help. Legolas's cries became louder and more distressed.

"ARAGORN! A LITTLE HELP HERE WOULD BE APPRECIATED!" Aragorn shook his head, having spotted one or two of the fangirls staring at him, and he had no desire to become the fangirls' new target. Legolas whimpered as the fangirls who were not trying to undress him decided that it would be sensible to rip up the tunic so they could all have a bit. Alanna and the other fangirls had finally managed to undo all the fastenings on Legolas' shirt, and were now attempting to pull it off. Legolas suddenly had an idea – it had worked last time she had been out of control, but would it work now? Legolas swallowed his pride and pulled Alanna close. He kissed her hard then let her go and did the same for the others who were staring at Alanna and himself in horror. The others fainted in sheer delight that their object of obsession had kissed them, while Alanna merely shook her head and frowned at Legolas. Legolas noticed with relief that her eyes had returned to normal.

"Where were we?" Alanna asked. Legolas sighed and stood up, doing up his shirt.

He looked at her and replied dryly, "I don't care where we were, because I will be involved in this no longer. Goodbye." And with that, he stalked off to his trailer. Two fangirls tried to follow at a run, but Legolas whirled around, his bow strung and an arrow nocked on the string. He drew it half way and aimed.

"One more step, and I will not hesitate to shoot either of you." They backed away, and Alanna decided that for his sake, she should get rid off them. She called them over then said, "You can go now. I think he's upset." And they disappeared (because this is my mind and people can disappear at my will). Alanna waited for Legolas to go into his trailer, then followed after a moment.

Aragorn grabbed her arm, and told her, "Don't you dare try anything funny, because I don't want to be called forwards as a witness in a murder trial. Alright?" Alanna nodded sadly and carefully pulled her arm free from Aragorn's iron grip. She stood in front of Legolas' door, then turned the handle and stepped gingerly inside…

(A random woman pops up out of nowhere, with Alanna in tow)

"I am here to tell you readers, and you Alanna, about a very worthy organisation – the RSFPOE, or the Royal Society For The Protection Of Elves. It was created in order to protect the UK's and New Zealand's decreasing population of elves, and there are very strict rules in place that were specifically designed to help do just that. And I think that you will find that you, Alanna, have breached those rules by doing what you did to Legolas." Alanna raised one eyebrow at the odd woman. "Yeah right. Whatever. By the way, what the hell are you doing in here? This is my mind? Get out!" Alanna shoved the woman to one side. Aragorn appeared and shook his head at Alanna. "You know, she did have a point." Alanna glared at him.

"Oh whatever. My head hurts, I'm going to lie down." And Alanna disappeared. Aragorn shrugged.

"Ummm… please review? God knows what that girl is going to do to Legolas next chapter… but yeah. Hope you enjoyed." Aragorn said. Silence followed, so Aragorn shrugged and wandered off to console Legolas and try to get an appointment at the therapist for him.