Because this one took a while to come out, just a friendly little reminder of what happened last:
Her human feet settled back down onto the bumper and she freed one arm to push on the tailgate and wrench herself out from under her tarp. She stood, shook out her long, mahogany locks—still damp, from her morning swim, perhaps—and pulled her hair back into her standard ponytail.
Although I could look at her all day, I couldn't stand here and watch her any longer. It was time to face my mermaid.
"Bella!"
Bella's head jerked up at the sound of my voice.
And she immediately toppled off the bumper of her truck and plummeted to the ground.
"Bella?" I called, running towards the bundle of flailing arms and legs.
She stumbled, unable to find her footing again, and I reached around her waist to steady her and help her stand. The second I touched her, she threw an elbow to my ribs, effectively knocking the air out of me and breaking my hold on her. For a tiny thing, she sure could pack a wallop. Before I could even catch a breath to ask what was frightening her, she shoved me away and bolted in the opposite direction towards her truck.
I rounded the corner of her truck in time to see her using all of her body weight to wrench open the driver's side door. The heavy door swung open with a force that knocked her off her already shaking legs. On the ground, she rose to all fours, only to whack herself in the head on the bottom of the door. I winced as she huddled on the ground with her hands on her head.
"Bella?" I wheezed.
She whirled. Her brown eyes widened at the sight of me, and she curled up against the door of her truck, making herself as small as possible. I had imagined our small reunion playing out in several different ways, but her quaking in fear at the sight of me was definitely not one of them. Before her, I sank to my knees but maintained a careful distance. "Bella?"
"What are you going to do to me?" she signed.
At first, I figured I must have misunderstood her. But when I went over the signs again, I realized with horror that I had translated them correctly. "What?" I asked, incredulously. "Nothing. Oh my god, Bella. Nothing."
My reassurances did nothing to help; she still looked more like a hunted rabbit than a girl or a mermaid.
"What makes you think I would ever want to hurt you?" I asked, almost pleading.
"You were waiting for me," she signed, glancing over to my car directly across from hers in the parking lot.
"No, no. I was late, too" I reached in my back pocket and retrieved the backup note I had written for her, explaining that I was willing to hear her out if she wanted to give us another go. "And I waited for you because I wanted to talk to you about our date." I held out my note, "Look."
She accepted my offering, careful to make sure our hands did not touch in the exchange.
As she read, a little 'V' appeared between her eyebrows. When she finished, she put the note on her lap and stared at me, dumbfounded, for a few seconds before she finally signed, "But, you know."
I swallowed hard, "I might."
Her jaw clenched.
"What I mean is, I don't know anything for sure. I have a few... guesses... but none of them matter. They don't change what I think about you."
She held up my note and cocked her head to the side.
"Yes, I mean every word in there. I want to continue going on as we were before. And don't worry about explaining why you left. I was already going to accept any story you were willing to tell me, Bella. We can just forget it ever happened."
"You won't forget. That's the problem," she signed, then tapped her head as if to say, "it will always be on the back of your mind."
"Well, that will be my own problem. I was going to play dumb about the whole thing, anyway. I was going to wait until you were ready to share. And I can still do that, Bella. I promise I won't push or pry or ask any questions."
A small spark of golden hope glittered in her eyes, but it was quickly replaced with sorrow. "I can't do that to you," she signed. "It wouldn't be fair."
"We can make it fair. I'll keep a secret from you," I offered, "I won't tell you the secret ingredient to my deviled egg recipe or say anything about my double life as a clown impersonator."
A smile flashed across her lips. It was small, timid, but still the most beautiful thing I had seen in over two weeks.
"I'll be okay, Bella. I can wait until you're ready to trust me."
Her lower lip quivered slightly with indecision.
"Come on," I offered her my hand to help her stand, "We can start small with lunch in the library today."
She grabbed my wrist with both hands and brought my hand up to her face, so it was cupping her cheek—right where I had placed it when we laid on the beach after she saved me. I stilled, my heartbeat breaking into an uneven gait, the feel of her touch moving up my arm and spreading like the feel of the sun on my skin. Carefully, I moved my thumb and stroked her bottom lip—it was just as perfect as I remembered. At my touch, her face practically melted into my palm, and her eyes fluttered shut.
We stayed like that for some time. As she considered, she stroked her own thumb along my wrist, keeping pace with mine on her lip. Too soon, she reluctantly released my wrist. I left my hand where it was against her cheek.
"Why?" she signed.
"Isn't it obvious?" I let out a small laugh of disbelief. How could she not know? "I like you."
At that small confession, she turned her face into my palm to hide her smile. I loved how easy it was to get her to smile like that—shy and sweet and painfully adorable. I placed my thumb under her chin to gently guide her gaze back to meet mine. I wasn't going to let her hide that smile anymore.
Still smiling, she pushed my hand from her face and signed, "Get in the truck."
"What?" I asked, my hand already missing the feel of her.
Struggling to stand on shaky legs, she smacked the door of her truck with the palm of her hand to repeat her instructions.
"I get that," I said, taking her hands to help her stand, "I meant why?"
Bella hopped up into her truck, grabbed a pen from one of the cupholders, and scribbled something on the bottom of my note.
I already trust you.
Bella trusted me.
I reread the words over and over, feeling the stupidest grin spread across my face. As I stared at the addition to the note, Bella gave me a little shove so she could shut the door. Then, she crawled over the bench to unlock the door on the passenger side. When she saw me still standing outside the door, she gave me an encouraging smile and patted the seat beside her.
"What about school?" I asked through the glass.
She shrugged.
I couldn't argue with that logic.
Remembering to pace myself so I didn't look too much like an over-eager dork, I went around the front of her truck and slid into the seat beside her. I grinned, amazed at how we were progressing. Just last night, I was laying in my human bed in my human world, preparing myself for the bitter taste of rejection. And now, I was sitting beside a beautiful mermaid who found me worthy of trust, presumably on our way to a secret, fantasy lagoon so I could see her splash and play in the waterfalls. Behind the wheel, Bella beamed like she couldn't believe this was really happening, either.
I was still daydreaming of Bella with a tail lounging on a rock in the sea when we turned out of school grounds onto the adjacent highway. Horns blared immediately, and I glanced in the window to see the three cars that needed to slam on their brakes to adjust their speed to match ours.
It turned out, Bella drove just as you would expect any fish to drive if you plucked it out of the water and placed it into the cab of a Chevy. I swallowed every yelp, cry, and warning, deciding it was best to just sit still and pray that we didn't die. I sat on my hands to prevent me from reaching up and holding onto the handle above the passenger window for dear life. One of my previous foster mothers—Renee or Siobhan—used to do that whenever they had me drive, and the sight of it in the corner of my eye stressed me out to no end. I didn't want to do the same to Bella, no matter how poorly she drove.
The truck didn't move fast enough to be terrifying; here on the highway, we were barely going forty-five, and the drivers around us took that personally. Bella took no notice of the drivers cursing her out as they sped around in the other lane to pass us. In fact, Bella seemed to be aloof to most of the things around her as she drove. Hitting her breaks a second too late, changing lanes without checking her mirrors. Every time she looked over at me to gift me with one of her charming smiles, it took everything in me to simply smile back and not shout at her to look at the road.
We continued north. The eight-lane highway became four, then two, and the highrises and skyscrapers lowered into homes spaced further and further apart. Soon, the buildings disappeared entirely we were surrounded by trees. Something I hadn't experienced since I moved here. They weren't lush or green enough to remind me of Forks, but they were still nice to see, all the same. The familiar landscape and the empty road ahead of us let me relax for the rest of the drive.
After forty more minutes, we abruptly turned off the highway and over some bushes. A yelp escaped my throat and I tried to disguise the sound with a cough. On the opposite side of the brush was an old, dirt road. Bella seemed to have it memorized, turning just in time to avoid potholes and rocks, and other obstacles in the way. When it looked like we were about the crash into a tree in the middle of the road, the truck came to a grinding halt. Beyond the tree, sat a dingy structure with an unusable pier jutting out into the water. For a moment, I thought this might be where Bella lived, but it couldn't be. The shack was inhabitable. The metal roof was rusted over, the windows were boarded up, and the concrete stairs up to the front door had crumped to the point where someone couldn't even access the building.
Bella opened her truck door and I copied her. She grabbed a notebook and pencil out of her bag, which confused me. I assumed we had driven to the water so she could show me her alternate form. I was really hoping I was going to make out with a mermaid on the beach. I didn't think we needed a pen and paper for either of those things.
She looked at my askance expression, jotted something down, and tore out the page so she could hand it to me. I need you to fully understand what you're getting into, first.
I nodded. My sign language was only good enough that I could get the gist of what she was saying. Whatever she wanted to say was going to be important. She didn't want to risk any miscommunication.
Bella hopped down from the cab and marched ahead with a clear destination in mind. I climbed out of the truck and trotted through the sand after her. She ignored the abandoned tackle shop completely, turning towards the frail pine trees and shrubs that made up a forest along the water's edge.
Glancing back, her old truck blended in with its surroundings seamlessly. Then, I realized, that was the point. Bella was beyond clever; this was the perfect place for her to stow her truck while she was in her other, more aquatic form. No one would look twice at an old, rusted Chevy parked beside an equally old, rusted building. And no one would dare attempt to tow it.
The abandoned tackle shop and the encroaching forest created the small, private beach that Bella was leading me to. Several large rocks broke the waves near the shore, making it impractical for swimming or surfing, but ideal for mermaids to sit upon and brush their long hair, I imagined.
Bella stopped in front of a fallen tree out of the reach of the lapping waves and sat. Without a moment of hesitation, she kicked off her flip-flops and dug her toes into the warm sand. I followed suit, taking a bit more time removing my sneakers and socks and rolling up the hem of my jeans twice.
"We both know I know what you're about to say," I started, my nerves over the whole scenario made words spew out of me, "You should know that I don't care. Really. It's actually really attractive. I'm pretty sure my first crush was Ariel. It was all about that… shell… bra…" My sentence trailed off when I peeked over and saw her wary expression.
Right. Pop culture references went right over my own Little Mermaid's head. I needed to get it out before Bella decided I was too much of an idiot to keep her secret.
"I know that you're a mermaid."
There. The word was out there, hanging between us.
Bella tucked her bottom lip between her teeth, wrote something down in her notebook, and offered it to me.
Siren, was all the page said.
"Siren?" I read aloud.
She nodded, reaching for the notebook, which I handed back to her.
"You're a siren?"
She nodded again, already writing something else. Mermaid works too, I guess. When I read up on human lore, I thought your idea of a Siren had the closest depiction of us.
I thought through the differences humans made between mermaid and siren and wondered what difference was important enough to Bella to make that distinction. "Those creatures in mythology that lure sailors to death by singing?" I asked as she handed me the notebook again.
If you were to ever hear my voice, you would immediately fall under my spell, walk into the ocean, and drown yourself so I could feed on you.
"You can speak?" I asked.
She gave me a withering look, and I realized that wasn't supposed to be my main takeaway from what she had written. Warning bells should be going off; alarms should be blaring. I had willingly followed a man-eating monster to a secluded area, where no one would ever think to look for me. All she needed to do was open her lovely mouth, and I would die.
But I couldn't find the proper fear that told me to get up and run from her.
Again and again, I searched for loopholes or jumped through hoops to stay with this girl, and Bella just lit the hoop on fire. When she was deaf, I learned sign language. When she was mute, I was prepared to care for her through whatever past trauma she endured. When she was secretly a mermaid, I was going to sit dutifully in the dark while I waited for her to open up.
Now that she was a siren, I was going to learn how to jump through a ring of fire. "Okay," I stated.
She whirled as if my gentle acceptance was the last thing she expected to hear. And it probably was. She went back to the page, underlined voice and spell, and circled drown three times.
"I know," I sighed, placing my hand on the page next to hers, "It doesn't matter."
I could kill you, Edward.
"So could anyone else in the world if they were dedicated enough," I pointed out. She could kill me, sure, but she wasn't going to. In fact, she had done just the opposite. When she found me drowning, she pulled me out from the depths instead of further down. Just this morning, when she thought I was going to hurt her, she kept her lips closed. She was nothing like the oceanic predators in ancient lore. "And you're not going to."
You're sure?
"Absolutely."
She reacted to my encouraging smile with an exasperated sigh.
It could be an accident.
"And how many people have you killed?" I challenged, already fully aware of the answer.
None.
"Same!" I exclaimed, "See? We're already perfect for one another."
She rolled her eyes and bit back her smile.
I wrapped my hand around hers. "I trust you, Bella." Just as she trusted me not to hurt her despite knowing the truth, I trusted her.
She looked down at our hands. When her fingers gripped mine, I knew I had won her over.
"You're not going to do anything to hurt me," I stated confidently. "You eat fish, not people."
I released her hand so she could write. Sushi at night.
I laughed at that. Looking back, I realized that I had almost caught her in a lie that day at lunch when I asked her about her eating habits. Her awkward reactions were because she was flustered, not because she was bad at flirting. "You know, I thought you were fishing for me to ask you on a date that day. I can't believe you were actually fishing for sushi at night."
I felt her shake the log with her own silent laughter. It was a good out. It was also a good date. She sighed heavily and added, before I ruined it.
"Hey, we're past that," I reminded her.
She wasn't. I'm sorry, Edward.
"I had forgiven you before I even knew the truth." Tentatively, I placed my hand on the log to the left of her, careful to not have my arm touch her back but keeping it close enough so she was aware of the invitation. To my immense pleasure, she accepted my offer and leaned into my side. The feeling of her against me lit my body with the sweetest flames.
"But that's why you left, right?" I continued, "The rain would have exposed you."
She nodded. It only takes a little bit of water for my scales to appear. Too much, and the whole tail comes out. She tapped the paper with the tip of her pencil, thinking. You saved me that day in the pool.
"And you saved my life," I smiled, "consider us even."
At that, she let her head rest against my shoulder. Thinking of that night, something dawned on me, and I was surprised I hadn't thought of it before.
"I didn't get to properly thank you for that," I continued, "Thank you."
You're welcome, she wrote then doodled a little heart beside it.
"Crazy that despite the vastness of the entire ocean, you happened to be right where I was drowning that night."
The moment I felt her stiffen beside me, I knew my theory was correct.
I smiled to myself and continued, "You know, the reason that I went into the water in the first place was because I saw a human head too far out in the water to be safe, and I went in after them."
Her face was angled down towards her notebook, but I could see the apple of her cheek turning pink.
"You wouldn't have happened to see that other person, huh Bella?
She was bright red now. She quickly scribbled on the page, next question.
But I wasn't about to let it go. "It was so lucky that you were right where I was. What were you doing where I was running on the beach, Bella?"
She pointed again to her only thoughts on the subject, next question.
I laughed. I knew it. My sweet, little siren stalker. Too ashamed to admit hers was the head I saw bobbing in the water that night. My theory was confirmed, so there was no need to terrorize the poor thing anymore. I moved on, just as she requested. "So, you've mentioned sisters before. They're all..?"
She gave me a single nod and pointed to the top of the page: sirens.
"And are they all up here on land with you?" I asked, "Dazzling other boys in other school systems?" I wondered how many other sirens were walking around up here, blending seamlessly into society.
She shook her head. It's just me. I told you I was different from the rest of my family. My mother and my sisters are out in the ocean, somewhere. They rarely use their human disguises, and even then it's just to feed.
I frowned at that, "You're all alone up here?"
She shook her head again, I have Charlie.
"Who's Charlie?" I asked, trying and failing to not get jealous over the mere mention of another man's name.
You'll see. He's too far out for you, now.
The words confused me in this context, but I dropped it for now, eager to move on to a different subject that didn't include some other guy. Feeling a bit territorial now, I removed my hand from the log and twisted my fingers through the end of her ponytail. "Why are you up here on land without your sisters? Why is it just you?"
I waited for a long time as she composed her thoughts—writing things down, erasing some, and re-writing others. It was the first time I had seen her struggle with her words.
It wasn't always like this. I lived with my mother and sisters for a while, when I was younger. I mainly remember swimming and playing, mostly swimming. My mother or older sisters would bring back food for us to feed on. I didn't think anything of it for so long. It was food, and I ate it.
When I got old enough, my mother told me it was my turn to help provide for the family. She and my sisters took me to shore. They promised that all I had to do was sing my song, and my prey would take care of the rest. I did everything my sisters told me to. I looked for a human alone in a secluded area close enough to the water. There was a girl by the water's edge. When I got out of the water to sing, she started to scream and begged for me to leave her.
Begged.
It terrified me. I didn't know. I didn't realize humans we ate were like that. I let her go without saying a word. I had to. She was so scared, and the thought of eating her scared me too. When I returned home with nothing, my mother was furious. From that point on, I refused to eat anything my mother or sisters brought home, knowing that what we ate had screamed and begged for life.
When I got hungry, I watched the other creatures hunt around me, who seemed to do just fine without eating humans. I tried out clams like the otters and krill like sea lions and found all sorts of fish to be just as satisfying, and they didn't scream or beg. When it was my turn to hunt, I would return with fish, and soon I was taken out of the hunting rotation entirely.
Eventually, my mother grew sick and tired of my diet. She told me that I had to contribute to the family like everyone else or leave. I wouldn't do it, Edward. I wouldn't hurt humans when there was a better way. So, I left. And that's why I am up here.
I read what Bella had written, and then reread it. Amazed. In our previous encounters, I could pick out the hints of Bella's kindness and bravery in the pieces of herself that she was willing to reveal to me. And now her courage was written out so clearly on this page. I found myself to be just as besotted by the monster as I was by the girl, possibly more so.
"Bella…" I started, trying to find any words that could explain how awestruck I was by her. But when I looked down at her, tucked into my side, her face was still lowered, and her cheeks still burning. Bella was shy, and it embarrassed her to expose herself like this to me. I reigned in my fervent adoration for her and quietly whispered into her hair, "Everything I learn about you is more amazing than the last."
I watched her flushed cheek rise as she smiled.
Carefully, I removed my hand from her hair and cupped her hip, "Keep going," I encouraged, "Keep dazzling me."
Her hand shook slightly as she wrote, marring her normally perfect penmanship. I don't know how.
I smiled at that. All she had to do was exist and I was dazzled. "Tell me about your life as the bravest, most beautiful siren in the sea."
I watched the red in her cheek deepen. What would you like to know?
"Do you spend your days sitting on a rock at sea, brushing your thick, lustrous hair?"
The pencil tapped on the notebook twice. I imagined she was confused over what I was talking about. Still, she indulged me. No.
"How many boats have you crashed by distracting the captain with your otherworldly grace and beauty?"
I held in a laugh as I felt her quirk her head to the side, still not understanding my odd, specific questions. None.
Now I was just being cruel. "How often do you break out into song with your fellow sea creatures?"
She didn't even bother to answer that one. She placed her pencil down on the notebook as if to say, "I'm not answering any more stupid questions."
"Okay, I'll be serious now," I placed my other hand on her knee, "You change form in the water?"
"Yes," she signed.
Slowly, I circled her knee with my finger. "You have a tail?"
Staring at my hand with wonder and fascination, she nodded her head.
My fingers traced along the side of her thigh, stopping at the hem of her dress. "What color is it?"
"Would you like to see?" she signed in her lap.
I removed my hand from her thigh and used two fingers to guide her chin up, so she was looking at me. "Yes, please."
She kept her eyes locked on mine as she stood. I watched her tuck her bottom lip between her teeth, as she considered whether or not she was going to go through with this. She gave herself one final nod of encouragement and padded down the sand.
Facing the water, she pulled her hair out from her ponytail, letting it fall free past her lower back in dark, cascading waves. She peaked back behind her shoulder with one, last feeble smile before she removed the straps of her dress and pushed it down to a pile around her feet. She stood there, for a bit, her toes just out of reach of the lapping waves. I watched her bare shoulder rise and fall as she took in a deep breath.
And Bella stepped into the water.
I know, I know. Another small cliffhanger. I am so sorry that this one took a while to come out (believe me, I'm worse with my other fic, you guys are lucky). I have fulfilled all of my "after we're vaccinated" obligations, and I'm hoping for a chill, gentle summer full of inspiration and frequent chapter updates.