Well, here it is: the second-to-last chapter! Honestly, I can't believe I'm already nearing the end to the first story I've ever finished. And other than that, there's really not much to report…XD Oh, but I would like to thank the splendiferous people who've taken the time to leave a review!
My unofficial disclaimer: Sorry in advance for any OOC-ness, liberties taken with the original plot, and/or contrivance/clichés. Also, I apologize if the particular pairing in here isn't your cup of tea. I'm pretty sure I'm starting to take some serious liberties with the original plot by now, so I just wanted to warn you…-sweat drops-
And without further ado, I present to you: Chapter Four!
-4-
"Welcome to Hamburger Heaven! May I take your order?" Kiyone asked in a voice sweet enough to induce cavities while she plastered her fake smile on her face with practiced ease. It had been a week since that night on the Yagami, and the young woman still felt like she was floating on the proverbial cloud.
Kiyone opened her eyes to take the customer's order and promptly wished she hadn't. She had the feeling that she was talking to an enormous pig that had somehow managed to master the abilities of standing on two legs and speaking. The hapless woman involuntarily shuddered when she realized that three of her could probably fit in his gigantic stomach.
"Yes, I'll have four Biggie Burgers with ketchup, lettuce, tomatoes, anchovies if you have them, mayonnaise, onions, radishes, pickles, tartar sauce would be lovely, mustard, chocolate chips, and extra bacon." The gargantuan man reeled off rapidly while counting off on his sausage-like fingers.
Kiyone's lower jaw fell to the floor, and she had to bite her tongue before she remarked sarcastically, "You do realize that bacon is probably a relative of yours…" Instead, she inquired in her much-too exuberant voice that she saved for her mindless service industry jobs, "Uh, would you like fries with that, sir?"
She grunted with effort when she handed the customer his order because it was in the equivalent of a brown paper grocery-bag. The man daintily ate a single French fry with his pinkie finger extended, nodded curtly, and marched off with his arms hugging the humongous bag of heart attacks-on-buns.
Kiyone sighed in relief as the stream of customers dwindled and rested her chin on her fist. Her thoughts drifted to the events of the past week, and she involuntarily blushed. Gah, she reprimanded herself, I'm acting like some silly schoolgirl! The embarrassed policewoman shook her head to clear her head of the childish thoughts, but she couldn't help but think of all the secret glances she and Tenchi had stolen to look at each other and the quick, innocent kisses they had shared after being positively certain that no one was watching. However, her fondest memories were of their talks with each other after everyone had gone to bed. Kiyone had never been a very open person, but she found it remarkably easy to share her dreams, aspirations, and fears freely with Tenchi.
C'mon, get a hold of yourself, Kiyone! The teal-haired woman internally scolded herself. I haven't had these sorts of ridiculous thoughts since…Her eyes widened in shock as she realized just how easily she placed the thoughts of her parents' deaths to the back of her mind. How stupid of me, she thought furiously, I completely forgot!
Kiyone gritted her teeth, frustrated at herself for forgetting what should have been the most important issue on her mind. I haven't made any progress since that whole thing with that tree. Wait a minute…
Her inner-musings were cut short, however, when the bell signaling that someone had entered the restaurant went off. She quickly straightened up and had just positioned her phony smile on her face when she saw who it was.
"Tenchi!" Kiyone exclaimed in surprise. "What are you doing here?"
The young man who had just walked in grinned wryly and replied with a laugh, "Well, it's great to see you too!" He rested his arms on the counter and leaned over, placing a quick peck on Kiyone's cheek.
"Oh, you know that's not what I mean," she sighed exasperatedly while rolling her eyes. "It's just…someone could see, y'know? Mihoshi might see us together..." Beads of sweat formed on both of their heads as they looked over at the flailing blonde who was trying to get used to roller skates. Kiyone idly thought that it probably wasn't the best of ideas to find a job that required workers to deliver food orders on wheels. Both of them winced in sympathy as Mihoshi screamed and flew into a wall at top-speed.
"Well, anyway," Tenchi began, trying to distract Kiyone who was growing increasingly angrier at her inept partner's antics, "To answer your first question: I was on my way back from school and I, quite frankly, had to see you."
Kiyone smiled and blushed slightly, but she tried to cover it up by saying sarcastically, "Geez, you can't make it a single day without seeing my beautiful visage, can you?"
"Nope," Tenchi answered simply before kissing the tip of Kiyone's nose.
They both had descended deep into the depths of playful banter when someone coughed angrily beside them. Kiyone grinned and giggled nervously as she caught sight of her manager seething next to her with a foot tapping rapidly and a vein throbbing. The hapless woman stammered to come up with a plausible explanation and the infuriated manager was just about to begin a tirade when a shrieking Mihoshi interrupted them both.
The blonde came flying towards Tenchi with a tray of food held high in one hand while the other flapped wildly. "W—w, watch out!" She screamed, but the collision was imminent. Suddenly, the clumsy blonde tripped and came hurtling through the air while the tray went flying.
With deft precision and smoothness, Tenchi plucked the wailing girl out of the air with one arm, caught the tray with the other, and glanced over at Kiyone and said lightly, "Yes, I'd like seven Biggie Burger meals and two Happy-Fun-Sunshine meals, please."
——————
"Hello everybody; I'm back!" Tenchi called out as he walked in the house while he struggled mightily to keep hold of the large bags filled with food.
Ryoko, who was sprawled out on a couch watching the latest convoluted episode of her and Ayeka's favorite soap opera, immediately phased out and reappeared on Tenchi's back. "I've missed you so much, Tenchi!" However, the extra, unexpected weight caused the luckless boy to topple over, sending the bags of food flying. The space pirate, as it so coincidentally turned out, fell on top of him in a rather indecent position. "Oh, Tenchi, not out here in the open!" She cried while pretending to be scandalized.
"Ryoko, get off of Lord Tenchi this instant!" Ayeka shouted furiously with shaking fists as she stomped over to them. She didn't hesitate to kick the space pirate over ferociously, but any viciousness disappeared instantly as she politely helped Tenchi up. That didn't last long, however, as she promptly stuck her tongue out at Ryoko who was currently blowing her a raspberry.
"Now girls," Tenchi sighed exasperatedly while stooping over to pick up the dropped bags. He looked up to see Sasami walk in from the kitchen, and he called to her, "Hey Sasami, I went out and bought us all some hamburgers for dinner. I hope that's ok."
Sasami waved him off and replied cheerfully, "Oh, of course it is, Tenchi!"
"You weren't making anything for dinner, were you?" He asked concernedly.
The young princess waved him off once more and answered, "Don't worry about it!" However, when she turned and headed back into the kitchen she muttered sarcastically under her breath, "I only went out of my way to prepare a gourmet meal, but who cares about that? I'm sure that sordid excuse for food will be absolutely wonderful."
Beads of sweat appeared on Tenchi's forehead as he caught strains of the princess's dark muttering and turned to face a suddenly suspicious Ayeka and Ryoko. "Girls, what is it?" He tried to ask while keeping the quavering out of his voice.
"You rarely bring hamburgers home, so we do find it quite odd," the purple-haired princess remarked while tapping a foot lightly.
Tenchi stammered while trying to come up with an excuse, "W—what do you mean? I just thought I'd do something nice and—"
"Hey Ayeka, doesn't Kiyone work at some hamburger joint?" Ryoko asked warily, despite the fact that she already knew the answer.
The princess nodded and replied, "Yes, I believe she does…quite strange, isn't it?"
"What does Kiyone have anything to do with this? She has nothing—" Tenchi was interrupted by a squealing Mihoshi who had just burst through the door with a worn out Kiyone shuffling behind her.
The blonde giggled and exclaimed, "Oh Tenchi, it was so great to see you at work today! I tell you, if you hadn't saved me from falling, I don't know what I would've done!" While Ayeka and Ryoko turned to look at Mihoshi, Tenchi and Kiyone slapped their foreheads at Mihoshi's loud mouth.
Tenchi groped for an excuse and spluttered, "Well you see, the thing is, I just happened to be in that part of town on my way back from school, and I thought I'd just pop in and say hi!"
"That's peculiar," Ayeka began slowly, "because I thought your school was on the complete other side of town. The princess and the space pirate turned to stare barbed, poisoned, and flaming daggers in Kiyone's direction.
Unfortunately, the beleaguered officer's brain functions were currently operating at extremely low levels, due largely to having to put up with Mihoshi's astounding amounts of stupidity all day while working a mind-numbing job for eight hours straight. Her brain had metaphorically sunken dejectedly to the bottom of her skull, so she didn't hear the warning bells go off when she suddenly announced absentmindedly, "Yeah, whatever; I'm going to take a bath."
They all blinked in surprise as they watched the oblivious woman teeter towards the bath. Mihoshi, who never stopped to think about potential problems, shrugged and made her way towards the couch with the intent of finding a television show to watch, preferably with bright colors and fuzzy animals. Tenchi stared dumbly after Kiyone, who had completely missed all of the fury directed onto her.
"Hey Ayeka, I suddenly feel like taking a bath too. What about you?" Ryoko asked while managing to keep her voice light and innocent.
The princess nodded in agreement and replied, "Yes, that sounds like an absolutely splendid idea, Miss Ryoko."
Oh geez, Tenchi thought and cringed as he watched them go, you might want to watch out, Kiyone.
——————
"Oh, that feels nice," the teal-haired woman murmured as she slipped into the scalding water. She slid down until she was completely submerged, blew a few bubbles through her nose idly, and resurfaced with a contented sigh. "There's nothing like a relaxing bath—" she began before the door to the baths opened suddenly, revealing Ayeka and Ryoko, who both struggled to keep neutral faces on.
The policewoman's senses finally began to kick in, and she gulped. Maybe coming in here alone wasn't such a good idea, she thought nervously. She warily eyed Ayeka and Ryoko as they slid in the water on either side of her while acting much too calmly for comfort.
"You and Tenchi have been getting quite close lately," Ayeka began conversationally in what was mean to be a light tone, though her facial expression suggested otherwise.
Realizing that she might as well make a futile attempt at ignorance, Kiyone responded just as coolly, "Really? I don't think I know what you mean, Ayeka."
"Don't play dumb!" Ryoko suddenly hissed. "We've seen how you two have been acting lately, and let me tell you—"
The princess interrupted in a reproachful tone, "Now Ryoko, there's no need for shouting." She then turned to Kiyone and continued evenly, "You must understand that Ryoko and I don't wish to be rivals for Tenchi's affections with you as well."
"I have no intention of doing that," the policewoman responded with what she hoped was a carefree laugh, "'cause I definitely wouldn't stand a chance up against you two in a fight."
Ayeka chuckled as well, but she then said seriously with narrowed eyes and a hardened expression on her face, "Exactly."
Kiyone's eyes narrowed as well, and she felt her fists begin to clench. The nerve of them! She seethed internally, and here I was thinking of the two of them as friends!
Ryoko patted her on the shoulder and added in an attempt at being comforting, "Look, it's nothing personal, but Ayeka and I both really love Tenchi. I mean, c'mon, there's plenty of fish in the sea and all that crap, right?"
"That's right!" The princess began, "And please don't get us wrong: we both have the utmost respect for you, but in all honesty, our love for Lord Tenchi is greater."
Kiyone startled the two women by suddenly standing up and walking off to the changing room. Without turning, she called over her shoulder in a listless voice, "Yeah, whatever."
After she had dried herself off and finished changing, Kiyone wordlessly left the baths. Everybody in the living room was engaged in a reality TV program, so nobody noticed her as she made her way to Washu's lab.
How dare they? The teal-haired woman fumed. I mean, honestly! If they really loved Tenchi, they'd just leave them the hell alone!
Kiyone took a few deep breaths to steady her nerves as she stood outside the lab. Whatever; that's not important right now. I can't believe I waited the whole week to do this…
The police officer knocked on the door, which immediately swung open. With one more deep breath, she walked in resolutely and called out, "Washu, I need to talk to you!" She jumped back in surprise as a door materialized out of nowhere, and a grinning Washu walked out.
"Ah, Kiyone, I've been waiting for you," the professor commented. "I wondered when you'd show up."
Not giving herself a chance to change her mind, the teal-haired woman blurted out, "Look, I'd like to take a genealogical test, if you don't mind."
The pint-sized professor smirked knowingly and replied, "It took you long enough to come up with that! I figured you'd be smart enough to figure it out on your own, but here we are a week later…"
"What?" Kiyone asked, dumbfounded. "What do you mean? How'd you know—" However, she stopped herself as a hula hoop-like ring attached to wires fell down from the ceiling and landed neatly around her. A bright light encased the startled woman suddenly, and it dispersed just as quickly.
"Washu, what was that?" Kiyone cried as the ring rose back up to the ceiling. However, the mad scientist ignored her as she began to type on the keyboard that appeared at her fingertips.
"Just as I thought," Washu muttered to herself without looking up from the computer screen.
Kiyone growled in irritation and shouted, "Hello, could you please fill me in on whatever the hell is going on?" She hated being left out in the dark, but the professor didn't seem like she was going to give up any answers until she had built up enough suspense.
At that moment, all of the girls and Tenchi walked in the lab, and Tenchi called out, "Oh, Kiyone, I didn't know you were in here! Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that your dinner's getting co—"
Finding that the suspense had been built up sufficiently, Washu effectively interrupted him when she turned to face Kiyone and bowed deeply, proclaiming almost reverently, "It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance, princess."