Chapter 17 – Bunch of Loonies
Claude Speed, Arbo, Metropolis City, 2030
Claude was happy with himself, he had become friendly with every gang in Metropolis City and now there was only one last gang to visit. Claude was loading his Uzi's while Lee was sitting on the couch in his vest, skin tanned as ever listening to the radio on the unvarnished table.
"Hello, welcome to Zaibatsu FM," the voice said Lazlow "here, we've got some great new music, I feel so young, well of course you may remember that I was cryogenically frozen for a few years, and I just got defrosted a couple of months back…"
Claude suddenly pulled out his Uzi and blasted a few rounds into the radio, Lee jumped in surprise and shock.
"What the f-ck are you doing?" Lee said "You f-cking broke my radio"
"You're listening to Zaibatsu propaganda" Claude said "that is who we're trying to fight against, there trying to grab your mind"
"Claude" Lee said walking up to him "this is not a support Zaibatsu programme, this is a music programme, by Lazlow, he doesn't support Zaibatsu himself; he just wants the money."
"I will not support any Zaibatsu programme!" Claude yelled
"So why didn't you just switch it over?" Lee shouted in anger
"I have to visit the last gang in Metropolis" Claude said changing the subject getting bored "Have any idea where the Loonies headquarters are?"
"I don't think I should tell you!" Lee shouted
"I'll buy you another f-cking radio man; just tell me where the Loonies headquarters are!" Claude shouted getting impatient
"The leader of the Loonies hangs out at the 'Fruitbat Club' in Fruitbat, his name's Elmo" Lee said
"See you later" Claude said walking away
Claude Speed, Fruitbat, Metropolis City, 2030
Claude's red futuristic car pulled up on the sidewalk beside the Fruitbat Club. A wooden sign painted lime green with dark red letters saying 'Fruitbat Club' stood on top of the stone stairs that seemed to lead down to a basement. Claude jumped out of the car and strolled down the steps towards a small red door where he could hear some loud dance music playing inside.
Claude pushed the door and it swung open. As soon as he stepped into the basement he could feel his breath escaping him, there was a massive dark room in front of him, all he could see was men in lime green clothing jumping to the rave music while perspiring and strobe lights flashing everywhere. The air was so smoky he stumbled past all the ravers on the dance floor and into a nearby wooden seat. Suddenly a dark haired man wearing a green suit and green trousers stumbled towards him and gave a grin.
"Come over here" the man in green shouted with a slur
As Claude stood up he slurred again.
"Come upstairs"
Claude followed him into a door way at the back of the room, the rave music had not changed its beat or tune the whole time. The door closed and the man in green led him upstairs and into a room painted green, he then shut the door of the room. However the window of the room was just above street level since the club was underground. Suddenly he pulled down his trousers.
"Ready then, girl" the, man said with a streak of madness
"What the f-ck are you on?" Claude shouted jumping back in disgust
"You're not one of the Downtown Sector girls? What sort of girl are you then? Where did you come from" the guy slurred pulling his trousers up
"I'm not a girl, I'm a man!" Claude shouted
"Are you?" the man in green slurred walking closely up to his face, when he was about an inch away Claude could smell alcohol on his breath.
"You're the guy who's working for me, aren't you?" the man asked
"Yeah" Claude lied
"Could you do a job for me this minute?" the guy asked
"Yeah, what was your name again?" Claude asked
"You've forgotten my name already, my god how can you forget that, nobody forgets their name, hey loonie!" he shouted "what is my name again?"
"Your name's Elmo" a voice answered from the hall.
"Elmo it is!" Elmo said
"Can I ask what you are on?" Claude asked feeling slightly weirded out by this guy
"Diazepam, SPANK, LSD, beer, whatever was in the kitchen fridge this morning" Elmo slurred again
"That'll explain" Claude muttered under his breath
"Sorry?" Elmo asked still grinning
"What job do I have to do, and most importantly what do I get paid?" Claude asked
"One of my guys that lives just on the outer deserts of Metropolis City says a policeman warned him of a drug raid, he wanted me to keep watch but I have something else important to do here" Elmo said
"What have you to do that is important?" Claude asked sarcastically
"I don't know, I'll pay you one thousand dollars if you'll make sure no police cars pull up beside his…" Elmo said. As he finished his last word he collapsed to the ground.
"Is that it then?" Claude asked Elmo now in a coma "I don't get a map then?"
Claude suddenly noticed a map lying on a table in the room. Claude picked it up and noticed a large red 'X' scrawled onto the map right to the North of Metropolis City where the desert was, which was marked 'Shack'. Claude decided to jump straight out of the window instead of going through the smoky, sweaty basement. He opened the window and jumped straight onto the ground. He opened the scissor doors of the red car and jumped in.
"What a bunch of loonies!" he muttered to himself turning the key and pushing his foot down on the accelerator. After a few minutes going north he neared north of the city where the desert was that surrounded Metropolis. He neared the dry desert and parked the car where the red 'X' was scrawled on his map. There was a wooden shack in the middle of the desert, overlooking was the skyline of the massive Metropolis City.
Claude stepped up to the door and gave a swift knock. He stood for a minute and as he began to walk away in frustration he heard a massive bang. Splinters of wood travelled in the lifeless air. There was now a massive jagged hole in the wooden door. The shot had definitely been shot by a double barrelled shotgun, Claude could tell by the sound and amount of splintered wood lying all over the ground. Suddenly the door was kicked open and Claude saw a face he swore he had seen before somewhere. He was wearing a green vest with faded jeans.
"Who the f-ck are you?" the man asked
The man had a distinct English accent and had grey hair and was significantly bald at the temples. Claude had no idea from what part, but he also recognised the accent.
"Hey, I work for Elmo! I work for Elmo!" Claude shouted holding up his hands
"You work for Elmo, man, that's f-cking good, I'm nearly having an 'eart attack 'ere… f-ck me" the man ranted "S'pose you better come in, you bastard"
Claude stumbled into the tiny shack and he saw posters sprawled about the peeling walls.
"I recognise you from somewhere" Claude said knowing he was right
"You do! I'm f-cking Maccer man!" Maccer shouted in glee that Claude recognised him, although Claude was sure he was drugged up to the eyeballs "okay I'm going a f-cking little grey man, hey maybe you would recognise me with my f-cking Maccer hat on!"
Maccer opened a drawer on a rickety wooden table, pulled it out and placed it over his head.
Claude punched his hand and said "Yeah! You were in 'The Gurning Chimps.' Whatever happened to your band?"
"I f-cking don't know, man, we were a f-cking great band, just drifted apart I guess, man I'm f-cking delighted you remember us" Maccer said
"My name is Claude, by the way" Claude replied
Suddenly they heard a loud shout outside.
"DROP YOUR WEAPONS NOW! THIS IS THE ZPF!" the voice shouted
"F-cking duck Claude" Maccer said in a whisper, still managing to curse
Maccer reached for his shotgun and Claude pulled out his twin Uzis.
They both ducked.
"Those f-ckers won't get this loonie alive!" Maccer shouted shuffling towards the side of the doorway. These policemen were more ruthless than Claude knew. The wooden door was suddenly kicked in and two policemen ran in. Claude jumped up and was ready to pump the two policemen full of lead when he suddenly recognised the policeman to his right. The face and eyes were familiar, and his beard he remembered from what seemed such a long time ago.
"Yo, put your guns down homie or I blow you to pieces!" he shouted
Claude couldn't believe that his voice fit with the identity he knew so long ago.
"Sanchez!" Claude whispered to himself in disbelief, taking a step back in shock.