A/N: Thank you to all of you who continue reviewing but to whoever keeps spamming the reviews with random things i would appreciate it if you could stop as it's difficult for me to read everyone's proper reviews. Thanks :) p.s sorry for any typos

18th September (the day Emily left) - 181 days until she returns

*Hanna POV*

It was now 5.30pm and Em should have landed in Texas by now. She said she was going to call me as soon as she lands and even though she wasn't even in Afghanistan yet I could not keep still as the nerves were taking over my body. I was sat on a stool at the island in the kitchen when my cell phone eventually starting buzzing, the initial shock causing me to drop it onto my lap.

'Em?'

'Hey Han' she said, I could hear the smile in her voice at the sound of someone familiar.

'How are you? Are you safe? Was you're flight okay?' I ask, the words scrambling off my tongue causing her to laugh.

'Okay which one do you want me to answer first?'

'The middle one, are you safe?' I ask, getting up at walking over to the refrigerator and inspecting its content.

'Yeah Han I'm fine, I've just settled into my bunk for the next 2 days' she spoke, my attention drifted from what she was saying to the food in front of me. I let out a sigh of disappointment which Em obviously heard.

'I'll be back before you know it Han, I promise' she said.

'I wasn't sighing at you, we have no cheese left' I whine, causing her to laugh once again.

'Oh nice to see food comes before me'

'Shut up you know I miss you, we were all wrecks back at the airport. Speaking of wrecks what happened with Ali?' I asked, I would like to say it was because I was concerned about the state she was in but to be honest I just want to know if they have declared their love yet.

'Nothing, we said goodbye...' She said, her voice trailing off and I'm no detective but that tells me that she's hiding something.

'And then you kissed' I finished off her sentence for her, causing her to sigh. After a complete silence from the other end of the phone I squealed, 'oh my god Emily Fields! You kissed a married woman!'

'Actually she was the one who kissed me', I actually screamed down the phone, jumping up and down. 'Did you give her the present?'

'No I haven't seen her, I'll take it around to her house now actually because I'm going to the grocery store for some cheese' I said, putting my coat on and placing Ali's present in my purse.

'Okay well I need to go do my medical exam now anyway, tell the other girls I'm thinking about them. I love you all'

'We love you too Em' I say, closing the front door and hanging up at the same time. As Ali's house is on the way to the store, I decided to stop by there first and hand over the present. By the 3 expensive cars in the driveway it looks like Charlotte might be round. I knock on the door and it doesn't take long for a familiar bleach blonde to open the door. I took a sharp intake of breath, even now it still feels scary and dangerous being around her. She seems to notice as she smiles sweetly.

'Hey Hanna'

'Hi Charlotte, is Ali around?' I ask, and I could see on her face that she was in some kind of battle on what to say, almost like she had been told to lie. 'I have something for her, from Emily' I say again, this time causing her to sigh slightly before opening the door wide enough for me to squeeze in. I've been to Ali's house a few times but I still don't know my way around and as Charlotte leads me up the stairs I literally consider writing down the directions for when I'm coming back. As we walk cross the landing, there is another spiral staircase at the end. I groan slightly, Charlotte turning around to see what the problem was.

'Come on'

'It's a marathon not a sprint' I say, practically crawling up the stairs. I really should start going to the gym. Once we reach the top at what seems like a converted attic there was an open space with a little bar/concession stand, a popcorn machine and a slushy machine with loads of candy and chocolate and sodas in a fridge. To the left was a door and to the right there was a door and still taking in the newly discovered part of Ali's house, Charlotte led me over to the door on the right. As I got closer to the door I could hear soft music playing. She knocked quietly before opening the door and allowing me to enter first. As I walked in, it was a huge open space with the sky lights letting in the sun which lit up the whole room. There was a black Grande piano in the corner and a huge bed swing hanging in the middle from the roof, with a very familiar blonde laying in it. But it wasn't the room that shocked me the most, it was the fact that the music I could hear was in fact Ali singing and playing the guitar. I didn't even know she could play the guitar never mind sing like that.

'Ali?' Charlotte said quietly, gaining her attention as she quickly stopped singing and sat up, almost embarrassed that someone had caught her. 'Hanna is here to see you' Charlotte said and I smiled when Ali's gaze landed on me.

'I don't want to talk' she said, getting off of the swing and putting the guitar back on its stand.

'I have something for you, from Emily' I say, lifting up the bag. She gulped, slowly nodding at Charlotte, signalling for her to leave the room. She walked over to me, taking the neatly wrapped gift and letter from the bag. She stood in silence, tracing her fingers over Emily's writing on the envelope.

'You don't have to open it now in front of me Ali, I understand' I smile and I can see the tears starting to appear in the corner of her eyes.

'Come here' I say quietly, pulling her into a hug. She instantly nestled her head into my shoulder, letting the tears fall down her face. I rubbed circles on her back and rocked her slightly, 'You've got yourself in a right pickle but it will be okay, I promise' I soothe, hoping it will calm her down. After a solid 10 minutes of rocking Ali and comforting her, both my arms and legs were beginning to ache so I guided her over to the swing and we both sat side by side, her head still buried in my shoulder as I stroked her hair. 'Come on Ali, it will all work out the way it's meant to' I say again, here tears now subsiding and she was just enjoying the comfort of being in my arms.

'Where's Rollins?' I ask, not wanting him to see her in this state over someone who wasn't him.

'Charlotte sent him grocery shopping to get him out of the house' she whispered. Despite the past Charlotte really was a good sister to Ali. 'Em told me what happened at the airport' I said quietly, not wanting to disrupt the peace that had settled around the room.

'You've spoke to her?' She said, bolting upright to look me in the eye with hope and sadness flickering through her eyes.

'Yeah, she's in Texas doing someone last minute tests before she flies out tomorrow evening. She was asking how you are' I said, stroking her arm. She nestled back into my shoulder, sniffling slightly.

'Everything is such a mess'

'When Em gets back you will sort it, you can both sit down properly and finally tell each other the truth about how you feel'

'I can't be married and divorced at 23 Han, my life has been crazy but that's the icing on the cake'

'You don't have to make any decisions about anything until Emily comes back. You have plenty of time to get your head around it.' I smiled, hoping it will set her mind at ease.

'Thank you Han, I love you' she smiled. After years of Ali not being an affectionate person I still find it weird when she actually looks grateful for something or says I love you but it's definitely something I've grown to love about her.

'I love you too Ali, you know that' I smile. 'But seen as though you love me I have a favor to ask. Do you fancy joining the gym with me? Or an exercise class or something' I could see her think about it, obviously not liking the thought of working out like me. 'Come on, it will take your mind off Emily for a few nights a week'

'Okay, yeah let's do it. How come you're not in New York with Caleb?'

'We are taking time out. We are still together and everything but we just need a break from each other for a few weeks' I smile, not really wanting to go into the matter too much. Unlike the old Ali who would squeeze you until she knew all the ins and outs of your problems, she just smiled sweetly and offered her support. 'I'll leave you to open your present then. I'm not entirely sure what Em wrote in your letter because I was meant to give you it if she wasn't coming back but at the airport she said to give it to you now but if you want to call her when she's in Afghanistan I have her number. You just need to ask' I smiled and I could see her face light up at the prospect of not being completely cut off from Emily for the whole 6 months she's away.

'Bye Han' she smiled as I walked out. Intrigued to know what was in the other room, I went over and opened the door.

'Jesus Ali' I say, looking into a home theater. There was a huge projector on the wall with two couches, one behind the other, which were long enough so you could lie on them. As I left the room, I grabbed a bag of m&ms from the bar/concession stand and made my way out of their maze of a home.

*No One's POV*

As soon as Hanna left, Alison went straight over to the gift from Emily and picked it up, along with the card, and made her way over to the bed swing. She sat for a few moments, contemplating which one she should open first before deciding on the small box. She delicately tore off the gift wrap to reveal a light blue Tiffany & co. Jewelry box. She opened the box to reveal a silver necklace with a silver mermaid holding a small aquamarine gemstone, her birth stone. She ran her fingers over the fine details on the charm, admiring how much it must have cost Emily. She chuckled to herself slightly, wondering if Emily knew about her nicknaming her mermaid or if it was just a coincidence that a mermaid was the one holding her particular birth stone. Either way, it was the most perfect, thoughtful gift that she had ever received and tears pricked in the corner of her eyes at the thought of maybe not been able to thank Emily face to face. She didn't dwell on the thought for long though as her attention was soon drawn to the hand written letter attached. Opening up the letter, she could see how long Emily had spent writing it, one of the newly gained powers she got from becoming an English teacher, even if she usually used it to tell people they hadn't put a substantial amount of effort into their homework or their hand writing wasn't neat enough. She took a deep breath before beginning to read:

Dear Alison,

If you're reading this then it could be because of one of two reasons. Either I'm dead or Hanna has gave this to you because I've asked her to or because she feels you'd want it now. Either way, it will still be good for me to say what I'm going to say.

I still love you Ali. There I said it. I love you. I've loved you since we were 14 and I have never stopped. Even now, whether I'm in Afghanistan or in a body bag I will love you. I'm so sorry for the pain I have caused you over the past five, even six, years from shutting you out and cutting you off from me completely. I know I've said this before but I couldn't stand the thought of being one side of the country and you being the other and talking like distant friends. I couldn't do it Ali because I craved you every single minute I wasn't with you, I thought about you none stop, wondering what you were doing or what we would be doing if we were together. I know you probably don't feel the same way about me, you're married after all. God Ali, you're married. When I found out, on the day of my dad's funeral I was honestly heart broken. That's why I uninvited you from the party. I couldn't bear the thought of seeing you happy with someone else, knowing that that could have been us if we just spoke about our feelings but what's in the past is in the past and we can't change that and maybe in another world we will be perfect for each other.

Anyway, I hope you like your gift. Back when we found your diary I found the extract about the mermaid and it was actually Hanna that figured out you were talking about me. I love that you called me that and still to this day I wish I could have heard you say it to my face. But I got you this gift so, even when I'm not there, you have a reminder of me. A reminder that I'm there and that you are my whole world, hence the mermaid holding the gemstone. It's like the song about God having the whole world in his hands.

If you're reading this because I have passed away, always know that I will be there for you Ali, looking down on you, protecting you and being your mermaid. I will always be your mermaid. If for whatever reason I am still alive and in Afghan, I hope we can finally talk and rebuild whatever we used to have because I need you in my life. Even though I'm alive, I'm still there with you Ali. If I am alive then please ring me, I'd love to her your voice at least one more time. I love you.

Your Emily

xx

Alison took a deep breath, the tears from the sudden movement now dripping onto the paper, smudging the ink slightly.

'You will hear me call you mermaid.' She smiled as she re read the letter over and over before taking the necklace and placing it around her neck. She reached for her phone, sending a text to Hanna:

'What's was Em's number? xx'

A/N: Did you guys prefer the 3rd person POV or do you like 1st person POV? I'm thinking of starting doing it in 3rd person from now on as it keeps some feelings and thoughts a mystery which a lot of you seemed to like. What do you think?