A/N: And I should be studying...well, I wrote this when I should have been studying, and now I'll study when I should be proofreading this...!

2. On the Meaning of Cost

They walk together in companionable silence, and she watches the harsh lines on his face relax ever so slightly as a gentle breeze teases at his hair, impossibly white against the vivid spring colors that decorate Seireitei and saturate their senses -

"Oi," says Hitsugaya suddenly, gesturing casually towards an empty doorway. "I need to talk to you."

"What is it, Hitsugaya-kun?" she asks, curiousity evident in her tone as she stares up at him with limpid brown eyes open wide and inquiring.

Their gazes lock. "I hear you turned down command of the fifth," he begins cautiously.

This is not a topic she wishes to discuss, so she sighs and offers no answer.

"It's been thirty years, Hinamori," he says firmly. "You've earned it. The twelve captains all stand by you." He pauses, his eyes softening imperceptibly as he continues, "And I, I will always stand by you."

She shows no sign of relenting, so he shakes his head and returns to his intended purpose. "How long have we known each other?" he asks, wincing at the awkward change of subject.

"What? Why?" she immediately responds, her demeanor one of concern as she postulates a root cause for his peculiar behavior. "Is something wrong?" She reaches a hand out to feel his forehead. "Are you feeling okay?"

"I'm fine, Hinamori," he answers, his eyes clear, his gaze certain. "You worry too much. Just answer the question."

She pouts and steps back. "Fine, whatever," she says. "A long time. Forever. Why?"

"Forever," he says thoughtfully. "That's exactly what I told Abarai."

"Abarai?" she asks, her brows knit in confusion. "What does Abarai-kun have to do with anything?"

"He's right, you know," he continues distractedly, as if talking to himself. "I've been foolish to wait this long."

She instantly tenses because she knows what he's about to say, and desperately tries to stem the flow of words with an outstretched hand. "Hitsugaya, don't," she implores.

But he has never backed down from anything before, and he presses onwards because it is the only thing he can do. "I've always loved you, Hinamori -"

"Stop," she says abruptly, and her entire being aches at the intensity of the pain emanating from the young captain standing before her.

Fierce, unyielding turquoise burn with a depth of emotion that she didn't think him capable of. "Don't say you don't care for me," he says through gritted teeth. "Don't lie to me. I know you care."

"Yes, but..." she answers slowly, her heart breaking under the weight of his scrutiny. "But..."

He capitalizes on her hesitation and takes her hands in his, but her movements are almost frantic as she pulls back and looks away, her shoulders hunched in misery as she stumbles backwards.

"I'm sorry," she says brokenly, rubbing her hands against her robes and glancing furtively at Hyourinmaru. "I can't, Hitsugaya. I can't."

He watches as she fidgets uncomfortably, as she wrings her hands and unconsciously tries to scrub invisible stains from her fingers, and the silence between them is rich with unspoken accusations.

"It's not that I don't love you," she begins, but he silences her with a cold look.

"Don't say it," comes his voice, eerily calm as the ice tightens its grip on his heart and solidifies over his soul.

"Hitsugaya-kun," she tries again, but he turns away and she chokes on her words, tears falling freely from her haunted eyes.

He stares balefully at the hands she finds repugnant, hands with which he protected her when she needed him most. "I know," he says, biting off each word with a hatred she cannot fathom. "You don't have to tell me. I may be a fool, but I'm not stupid."

He walks away, and she watches helplessly as her little Shiro-chan forever disappears, leaving instead a man shaped by his strength and shattered by her weakness.

Storm clouds gather in the sky as she bows her head and remembers the war, remembers his oath to protect her no matter the cost, remembers his bankai, remembers him standing over her with his hands drenched in Aizen's blood -

Characters: Hinamori, Hitsugaya