'You're nuts' were the two words running through my head throughout my entire morning. Normally when someone says that to me I put up a good damn fight to prove that I'm not but uh well in truth I am nuts. I'm absolutely idiotic to be doing this right night. Doing what you ask? Going to damn school.
I cussed myself in my head. Darry told me I shouldn't go but that didn't stop me. Sodapop wouldn't look me in the eye and only briefly muttered 'Watch out Pixie, they'll be mad,' before leaving the house with Steve who was skipping who only rolled his eyes, not even bothering to comment, he didn't have to, I knew what he thought. Two-Bit told me I was nuts just before we entered the building. And he was right.
He'd left me straight away, 'cause he sucks, we don't have the same classes, and well he hadn't been able to look at me in the eye since yesterday afternoon. Pretty understandable though as I could barely meet his eye either. And funnily enough no one had noticed yet, well maybe Dal had but I was still kinda ignoring him so you know.
I don't know how I managed this whole morning. I was getting soc boys hissing things to me, the girls didn't say anything but to me that was worse that words. The looks of pure hatred and disgust that crossed their faces when they realize the association I had with the two 'soc killers' as they'd all called them was so shocking and disgusting. The boys hissed the foulest things you'd believe in my ears in class and through the halls. None of them had touched me yet. But all the same I'd never imagined the safe haven I called school to be so petrifying.
But the words to me were worse than anything physical they could do. Because in my heart Ponyboy and Johnnycakes were as pure as gold and hearing them say all those nasty things about two people I loved the most in this world was like stabbing a knife in there, twisting it and then wrenching it out without a care in the world.
They were getting to me in the worst possible way and they knew it. I hadn't crumbled yet. I kept up my cool façade as long as I'd be able to. I didn't want to snap at them, I'd be asking for it then, I had to ignore them, as if their comments simply went over my head although they were hitting me where it hurt the most. My heart.
I was going to fourth period when I'd cracked. I'd stayed cool throughout the whole day even though I didn't want to. I wanted to scream and shout and o plain mental but I held it in. It wasn't until I heard what that randy boy said I snapped. You have no idea how much hate filled my body at that moment. I hated him more than hate itself. I actually wanted to kill him. The anger that pierced my heart in that one instant was excruciating.
"Hey Curtis," Randy hissed as I walked by to my locker. I remained cool and collected as I ignored him. "I know you can hear me, and I saw exactly what your no good brother and his friend did to my buddy Bob,"
"And what was that?" I snapped turning and staring him in the eye coldly.
"He was killed in cold blood," Randy hissed in my ear, his face inches from my own. I can't even describe the fear that ran through my body as his friends surrounded me. "But they were provoked."
Randy was touching me but I was pinned against the locker as if he was touching me. My face paled I'm sure and my green eyes narrowed slightly. Fear and pure anger ran through my body. My heart felt like it was being pierced. Provoked. Suddenly it all made sense.
"What the fuck did you do o my brother?" I demanded in a low cold voice that even shocked myself, my eyes flashing with anger, my fists clenched underneath my pile of books.
"Naughty, naughty greasy," Another boy said with a triumphant sneer plastered across his slimy scummy face. "Mind your tongue, you're with real gentlemen now,"
"What are you taking about?"
"Those so called gentlemen that pay you for sex," He said with a smug look. "Now we would never pay you, you're not worth a cent,"
My mouth dropped open and I didn't even realize what I was doing until I felt the pain sour through my knuckles as my fist made contact with the socs face. My eyes widened slightly as I pulled my fist back, I'd never actually hit someone before and he was cursing blue murder at me but that Randy guy shut him up, saying something about 'She's only a grease'.
"Seems you're headed in that same direction your dear brother was going on Friday." Randy said in that same hissing voice, coldness seemed impenetrable within him. "They retaliated but the cops will never know. As we're only the Socials, we don't touch scum like you."
"You provoked them! You're no good trash!" I cried out loudly. "You might have the money but you're a no good jerk!"
Randy looked away as if I slapped him. "Wanna know what we did to you're brother grease?"
"What?" I spat out.
"Tried to drown him," he laughed coldly. "The other one killed Bob. He deserved to die your brother. He's not gonna do anythin' for society, why waste the breathing space on no good hoods like you?"
That was it. The turning point. It was one thing punching that other soc but Randy was clearly asking for it. This time I really did slap him. Good and hard right across the face, he recoiled from me and I saw a red mark appear slowly on his cheek.
"Don't you ever -" Randy snapped angrily but before he could finish a girl's voice rang through the hall, she sure sounded angry.
"Randy you leave her alone!" Cherry Valance snapped, her eyes were red and puffy and right on her heels was Marcia who looked bitter. "What did she ever do to you?"
"Dammit Cherry! Her brother killed Bob! Your boyfriend!" Randy cried out angrily slamming his fist into the locker, inches from my head.
"Yeah her brother!" Marcia spat out her arms folded across her nice neat blouse. "She didn't do nothin' Randy no you leave her alone! Don't you think she's worried enough about him being missing?"
"He killed Bob!" Randy roared and the soccy boys all nodded and murmured angrily.
"What's done is done Randy!" Marcia cried out shrilly, I'd never once heard that girl raise her voice before. She sure was madder than that Cherry. "It can't be taken back now no matter how much you want it! You were all drunk so you sure deserved it picking a fight with two kids!"
"They had a blade Marcia," Randy said in a low voice, but it was full of anger and hatred.
"And you didn't?" Cherry spoke up swallowing back tears. "I might've loved Bob but you all sure asked for it, what you did wasn't right now leave her alone."
"Randy please," Marcia said sounding pleading. "Just do it. One last thing for me, just leave her alone, stop the fighting, Bob wouldn't have wanted it like that," her whispered voice said sadly her arm thrown around her friend.
"Just stop being so god damned stupid!" Cherry cried out before bursting into tears and walking away, Marcia running after her, throwing us one last look of despair, she was pleadingly looking at Randy before they disappeared from our sight and Randy's head swiveled back to me.
"They were asking for it, probably like you do grease." He spat out one last time.
A couple of the socs threw me dirty looks before sauntering off. Randy lingered there for a moment. I was so scared and I was pinned up against the locker still. I could feel my lip trembling and my anger was welling up inside of me. When Randy turned around and began walking away I sighed with slight relief before finally calling out to him.
"Hey Randy?"
"What?" He snapped turning around to have his face connect with my fist. Boy would that bruise.
"You fucking bastard." I hissed before I spun around on my heel storming off in the direction for the front doors to the school.
"You bitch!" he screamed.
I didn't bother replying. A teacher stuck his head out of his classroom door but said nothing, I'm gonna guess Randy had cleared off but I don't give a damn. He should go rot in hell. Trying to drown Ponyboy! No wonder Johnny fucking killed that stupid Bob Sheldon guy! Retaliation for trying to kill his best friend!
I shook my head angrily and banged open the front doors to our high school and strolled out onto the street as if I didn't have a care in the world. But in truth it felt like I had the whole weight of the world on my shoulders. Because they went after my brother my brother and Johnnycakes fought back. Because they fought back they tried to drown Ponyboy. Because they tried to drown Ponyboy Johnny Cade stabbed Robert Sheldon. Because he killed that boy they had to skip town and who knows where they are. Because they killed someone they might make Pony and I go to homes. Because of the socs my world was destroyed and what was left on it was weighing down on me.
I tried to hold back my tears and stifle my sobs but it failed and about three blocks from the high school I started to cry with pain and fear. Ponyboy cold have been the one dead instead of that boy! I was so lucky Johnny killed that soc but at the same time it was so awful that a boy that young had to kill another so young. It was like the world was putting us in the worst situations so they could get some entertainment. This was all so sick and twisted.
My tears soon dried up. I'd long cried them out over the past few days it wouldn't surprise me in the least if I didn't shed another tear for the rest of my life but that sorrow quickly turned to pure anger. I felt like destroying everything in sight. Even threatening Dallas so he could tell me where they were. I was just so damned mad. But the more it stayed inside me the worse I felt and eventually I just wanted to scream. But I never got the chance as I heard my own name screamed out.