I eventually arrived home about a half-hour since Johnny told me he wanted to be alone. I had dried all my tears and managed to compose myself as best as I could because I didn't want to worry the guys anymore than I need to that Johnny would…well I'm sure you knew because I don't feel like saying that word, its too…sudden. Blunt. Not right.

I slid out of Darry's truck and made my way up the porch and opened the front door when Two-Bit immediately grabbed me and swung we around and Steve and Sodapop were cheering and laughing loudly. I forced a smile onto my face but it was so fake andobvious that it was that Darry pushed him off me.

"Pixie, you okay?"

I bit my lip and shook my head. My eyes welled up and I kept shaking my head. "N-no. Did you win then?' I asked forcing myself to smile again.

Darry nodded and stared at me. "What happened?"

"Doesn't matter," I shrugged him off as I sat down on the couch.

"Where'd you go?" Sodapop asked me.

"What happened?" Darry demanded before Sodapop could get a word in edgewise. "Pixie, something must have happened!"

My lip trembled as I looked up to Darry in the eye. "I had to say goodbye, Darry," I whispered.

"Goodbye to who?" Sodapop and Two-Bit asked loudly.

Darry sighed slightly, his face frowning. "Johnny." He said simply. "What did he say?"

"Wanted to be alone," I sobbed my face in my hands as my whole body shook with my tears. Darry put his arm around me but I calmed down eventually. I don't think the other three even understood what we meant.

"Pixie, calm," Darry whispered in my ear after I wiped my eyes and my breathing slowed down. "It'll be alright."

No it won't, I thought. But I let myself believe him anyway. When you are near hysterics you believe most things. Darry rubbed my hand and then stood up suddenly when our front door banged open and I realized that Ponyboy wasn't here.

"Pony, where haveyou been?" Darry said interrupting my exact thoughts to explaining his absence.

I looked at him worriedly as he himself looked pretty shaken up. "It's Johnny." I froze. "He's dead. He just, I dunno, died or something."

"Where's Dallas?" Darry asked looking pretty freaked out himself. I mean it was Johnny. How could he be dead! I felt like screaming that but I held it in. For Pony's sake.

"He just freaked out and left," Ponyboy shrugged and sat down besides me.

Without hesitation I threw my arms around my little brother and squeezed him in a tight hug. He didn't even resist or tell me off for being motherly like he would've just one week ago. He welcomed me over and mywarmth for him and held back onto me as I heard him sniff. He was just as upset as I was. Probably more and I think he was thinking the same thing I was. Stuff the guys, right now was the time for tears.

"So, Johnnycakes, is really gone then?" Sodapop asked cautiously to no one in particular and someone must have nodded because I saw him kick a chair. "Dammit!" he exclaimed.

I looked him in the eye. My green eyes meeting with my twins and he just frowned and so did I. I couldn't express much in my eyes. I imagine they were full of emptiness. I don't think I could have even held sadness in them because I was too in disbelief that it was happening. Why does it have to happen to us! I wanted to scream and shout but before I had the chance our phone rang breaking the silence within our house.

"Darry, its for you," Steve said suddenly, he was the first to pick it up.

"Hello?" Darry said walking into the kitchen. I would say to hear better but well I doubt that as it was pretty damn silent right now. "Okay we'll meet you in the park. Bye."

I watched Darry hang up the phone and shake his head bitterly. "The fuzz are after Dally, he held up a store. C'mon we're meeting him in the park."

Without a moments hesitation the guys all bounded out the door, Sodapop in his socks and all. I followed them and they sprinted down the street to the park by Two-Bit's house. I ran after them as fast as I could muster. Ponyboy wasahead of us sprinting his heart out as we heard the sirens of the fuzz and we were on the street of the park as I heard Darry shout out 'NO!' and the sounds of guns shooting.

I saw Dally's face as his body was riddled with the bullets from the officers guns and a shout escaped his lips as Ponyboy shouted that it wasn't loaded. And I let out a scream as the boys around me shouted out to stop and I felt Two-Bit grab me and shield my sight by his body as he hugged me tight. Then I screamed out as Dally's body hit the ground and I was hugged tighter as I broke down in tears.

Everything was going in slow motion. The scream from a girl on the other side of the park. My eyes scanned the area for the sound of the voice seeing a glimpse of dark brown hair running. Dally's body hitting the ground. The footsteps as the officers ran over. My brothers and friends have looks of distress slowly transforming the happy smiles of their faces. Ponyboy's face paling before he hit the road as he passed out. My own body screaming out as my best friend cradled my body as I felt my own mind spin out of control with emotions and I hit a world of darkness for the second time in two days.

-

-

-

"Pixie? Hey, Pixiedust, you're okay now, you just kinda fainted," Two-Bit told me in a low voice, a half smile on his face. "I had to carry you in here myself 'cause Darry had Pony. You 'kay now, Pixiedust?"

I nodded and mumbled something as I rubbed my eyes. "Two-Bit?" I whispered.

"Yeah?" He asked as he placed me on one of those uncomfortable waiting seats.

"Did they really…"

"Yeah." He whispered his grey eyes full of sadness. "You're alright now. You wouldn't stop screaming then I dunno, you blacked out. Pony hit the ground, they reckon someone hit his head in the rumble."

I nodded sleepily and looked around. "Where's Pony?"

"They're just checking him over, don't worry." He said squeezing my hand. "He's just outta it that's all. He's a little sick."

"Okay," I yawned as Two-Bit's hand squeezed tighter around mine and I held it tighter back. "So I didn't break your back or nothing?" I asked him distractedly. I wasn't that with it at that point in time.

"Nope you're as light as a feather," Two-Bit said staring down at our hands. "Can't believe they're both dead, you know?"

"Two in one night." I whispered. "It's like losing our parents all over again. But worse because we never thought thatit'd ever happen again."

Two-Bit nodded. "But both of 'em. One's bad enough. And then you just fainted and Ponyboy blacked out and he's not awake, and oh, Pixiedust, don't do that again please," he begged as he held my hand tighter and I felt the need to hold it even tighter back.

"I won't. Not ever." I promised.

Two-Bit smiled with relief. "That's good then."

I nodded but before I could say anything Darry and Sodapop came out of a room and walked over to us and I smiled at them half-heartedly my eyes drooping shut. Like I said I wasn't back to myself yet.

"You're awake," Sodapop said sounding relieved and I saw him eye my hand clasped with Two-Bit's and he eyed Two-Bit but Darry just looked at him.

"They're keeping Pony here overnight, Pixie," Darry told me. "Go home with Two-Bit and Steve once he comes back, get some sleep, we'll be home in the morning, okay?" he said feeling my forehead. "You'll be fine."

"Why wouldn't I be?" I asked him curiously.

"I think she's a bit, uh…" Two-Bit said thinking of the word.

"Still dreaming." Darry said and Two-Bit nodded. "Just look out for her, okay? We'll see you tomorrow." And he kissed the top of my head.

Sodapop smiled sadly and trailed after Darry down the corridor and into a room. I yawned loudly and Two-Bit pulled me up and I spotted Steve walking towards us and I suddenly remembered everything and felt my lip quiver.

"I want to go home," I whispered as a tear ran down my cheek slowly.

Two-Bit glanced at me and I think he instantly realized I was back to normal. "Come on, Steve, she needs to sleep. So do you, man. Was it that bad?"

"I want to throw up." Was Steve's reply as he just walked at a fast pace towards the ground floor. "Hurry up or I seriously will." Steve said looking rather green as we hurried out to Steve's car in the parking lot.

"Come on, Pixie," Two-Bit said kindly sitting in the back with me.

I tried to smile but gave up and stared out of the window on the ride home. I felt my eyes slowly shut. I opened them and blinked hard a few times to stay awake but I kept drifting off to sleep. I jolted to the world of the living when Steve slammed the car door at our house and I dragged my feet into the house behind Two-Bit and crawled into my room and into my bed and fell asleep. It was one of the most peaceful sleeps I'll admit I've had since my parents passed. Because as soon as I shut my eyes I knew instantly that two souls were finally at a rest.