C26: Right, to stop me talking complete bullshit about Doctor who for four pages (Did you see last night's episode? It had sort of zombie like things innit!)

What's your favourite resident evil games from best to worst, mine's probably: RE4, RE remake, RE: CV, RE3: nemesis, RE2, RE1, any others are crap

And I don't care what anyone says, the films are decent

As for Prof Oak's crazy reason for wanting to kill all trainers, I will explain that later. It was all a result of me losing a lot of sleep, it didn't have anything to do with drugs, at least that's what my toaster said.

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Chapter 11: Beta

Lance

Two hours after Bruno had mysteriously vanished; Loreli had panicked for a while until we actually decided to go for the option we came here for. We set about getting the door open. A long conversation ensued which ended with Loreli taking to the keypad where a four digit code would be punched in with nothing but her fingers and hacking device issued to her before the mission began.

I had no idea how Loreli knew so much about this sort of thing but apparently it was a simple combination lock. I mentioned the obvious "why would security be so lapse?" but she just replied plainly "thousands of people worked here, why have a lot of security codes that people will have to struggle memorising?"

After Loreli had checked all combinations the code came up as 4127. The door slid open automatically. Loreli stood staring into the room feeling proud of herself, and then we noticed a figure standing in the centre of the room.

The main feature of the lobby of Beta section was that the back wall looked in on a huge aquarium behind it probably containing several dangerous pokemonsters. And I was proved correct when a massive blue serpent swam past it just missing the glass by an inch. I recognised the serpent immediately as a Gyrados, which was dangerous even when it wasn't infected with a deadly virus.

The figure was resting against the tank staring in at the creatures, I recognised him, I realised it was Bruno. And before I could yell out his name Loreli was dashing towards him, that was when I noticed the ceiling.

I followed her, sprinting now yelling "No Loreli!" but it was too late. Bruno vanished into thin air and the ceiling above us exploded in a shower of feathery creatures dive bombing towards us and within seconds I was being pecked to death by a swarm of ravenous spearow. I could feel them tearing the flesh from the back of my neck, mutilating my arms and legs. I collapsed in a pool of my blood whilst desperately trying to tear away the numerous birds.

Eventually I managed to get down on my hands and knees and crawl towards Loreli who was drowning in a sea of her own flesh and blood while two spearow were tearing skin from her face. In an attempt to help I raised my pistol and fired at the two on her face and they went spinning away in a shower of blood.

Loreli struggled through the swarm of carnivorous spearow towards me and drew a pocket knife and sliced for one that was picking away at bloody tatters covering my forehead.

But then the insanity ended suddenly. I couldn't understand it, all the Spearow dropped dead instantly. Loreli missed the spearow and caught a bloody tendril on my head.

"Ahh, fuck" I complained and clutched myself in several painful places. Loreli didn't need to apologise, there was no time and it was useless anyway.

We drew our attention towards the dead Spearow, wondering why on earth the cloud of ravenous birds had suddenly dropped dead. I smashed the nearest with the butt of my handgun to reveal a set of circuits wired into the Spearow's skin.

"Remote control" I said hoarsely.

There was no time for a discussion about the point of the attack for the reason became obvious when two more Pokemon appeared from a nearby doorway.

These explained why the section had decided to soften them up first, how could they possibly face up to a pair of huge rock solid Rhydon.

"We're fucked aren't we?" I stated obviously.

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C26: that chapter was short…ish but still who cares