Chocolate
Four
Written by: Makami

As soon as the lunch bell rang, Kotarou made a B-line for the bathrooms. He had to get a hold of himself. He had to get his thoughts together, or risk revealing ot all of htem about his little dream.

He breathed a beavy sigh of relief as he made it safely to the boys bathroom. Hiroshi had caled him after the class ended, but he was sure that he had lost the other teen. Yes, he had to have. The crowds were massive and it was next to impossible to keep up with someone.

"Oh gawd," he sighed. He slumped against the door and stared fixatedly at the floor. "What's wrong with me?"

He closed his eyes. A moment later a girl's startled shriek got him to open his eyes.

"What...?" He silently cursed at himself as his gaze locked with a brown-eyed girl's. She looked terrified, almost as though she might cry, and her bottom lip trembled.

Kotarou took the chance to gaze around the bathroom, and it looked a little more feminine that he recalled. The walls were a shade pinker than Misha's hair; there were more stalls with toilets in them; and there wasn't a single urinal in the entire bathroom. It clicked suddenly, that this was not the boy's bathroom.

"Oh, um, s--"

She finally worked up the courage to scream,

"Perrveeerrt!"

Panic filled him and he scrambled out of the girl's bathroom and into the still packed hallways. The girl's hysterical shrieks followed him. A few people who noticed where he came from made smart or disgusted remarks.

Why is this happening to me? he silently screamed as he went for the actual boy's bathroom. His face was burning; he could hardly believe the mistake he had just made. When he reached the door he checked the sign to make sure that it was actually the right one, then ran in.

The bathroom was silent, and he chanced that it was empty. He went to the sink and turned the cold water on full blast. He felt frazzled, confused, so disoriented--not to mention embarassed.

At least this time it's only from fear, he thought, dropping his backpack on the floor next to him. He placed his hand over his racing heard and willed himself to calm down, if even only a little.

Once he succeeded, he slumped over the sink and splashed the icy water over his face. It was refreshing. Calming, almost. Now if only he could figure out what to do about Takashi. No, no, he had to keep his thoughts away from the hot blond. The cold water worked to shock his mind out of constant flashes of his steamy dream.

Gripping the edges of the sink, he stared at his reflection. He was not sure what, or who, was staring back at him.

"I am not..." he started, then lost his nerve. If someone heard him, that would be a fate worse than accidentally walking into the wrong bathroom. He thought it instead, I am not gay. Ten is just a friend. I don't see him that way. Okay, come on, Kotarou! Get a grip!

The figure in the mirror stared back at him, droplets of water gathering at the tips of his hair. Wet bits of hair hung to his face, and the water slid down easily. The face on his reflection said that it did not believe him.

"I'm not," he said one last time, and turned away.

+

The school roof was the choice spot for loners and other students who just wanted to be alone with their thoughts. Kotarou found his sanctuary alongside the few others that had the same intentions. He liked the feeling of solitude that roof and its few inhabitants offered. No one bothered anyone else, and it worked.

I couldn't face him, he thought, running a hand through his hair. He sought out a decent spot and went there to gaze at the horizon. This was the perfect place to escape his problems. The others in his group never came here. It was just too perfect.

Oh, Misha, he silently pleaded. Can you help me? I really don't know what I should do. What did my dream mean? I'm not really... gay am I? And isn't it wrong, Misha? If I am, I go to Hell, don't I? But then how is that fair? You can't help who you fall in love with... not that I'm actually in love with him.

I am glad that everyone enjoyed that last chapter.

Sakura-no-Tamashi: I know, poor, confused little boy. -evil grin-

Seena58: - I just could not resist him having that dream.

Tokyo Kitsune: That's okay! I'm just glad that you liked it. I hope that you found this chapter okay, too. I wish that someone else would write a shounen-ai, too, though. I wanna enjoy some that didn't take me any work!