I finally binged all of Season 11 a few weekends ago... It was interesting to say the very least.

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Disclaimer: In no way do I have any rights to Supernatural or any of the characters you are familiar with. I only own Amriel and any OCs that pop up along the way.

Chapter Twenty: Overwhelmed

Castiel, now more alert and hyper-aware of his surroundings thanks to his newly acquired grace, headed through the door he had heard Amriel's screams emanating from not too long ago. He wasn't sure what he was going to find once he walked into the room, so he took a deep breath and entered quickly, keeping his eyes on the floor until the door had closed behind him.

His heart stopped and he felt the strange sensation of bile rising in his throat. Was he going to vomit for the first time in his existence?

Amriel was tied to a chair in the center of the room, a metallic tray wheeled up to the side of it and he saw that many of the tools were covered with blood. Her long hair was no longer the blonde it usually was- instead, it was matted with dark blood and she was covered in it too. Her clothes were torn and her entire body was slack against her bonds- she was unconscious. Castiel could clearly hear her screams resonating in his mind and he shuddered, fighting the anger that was quickly consuming his entire being.

Her outward appearance wasn't what horrified him the most, though. Cas could see her grace for the first time since the angels fell, and instead of the bright, glowing, lively light he remembered it as in Heaven, the grace was dull and reminded him nothing of Amriel.

Every time he had seen her in Heaven flashed through his mind and he knew it must've taken a lot to get her to this state. He could only imagine what they had done to her and while he knew that he could heal her injuries, he hoped that he could do something to restore her grace to its original state with what little power he had now. With time and rest, it would heal and regenerate, but Cas knew that with everything that was going on Amriel wouldn't sit back while he went after Metatron.

The girl began to stir, her face tightening in pain before her eyes fluttered open and she let out a low hiss, trying to sit up only to find that she was still bound. Castiel watched her eyes widen as a choked sob escaped from the back of her throat and his heart broke as he saw her panic, so he quickly moved forward and began to untie her.

"Please- no more. I can't help you! I don't know anything" she yelped, her eyes unfocused and unaware that it was Cas that had come to her aid. All she could see was the bright light of a strange grace and that was all she needed to know she was going to be hurt again.

"Hey, it's me. I'm here now, and we're going to get out of here, I promise," Cas told her, remembering his words to her only a few days ago when they had first been brought to this place. When she didn't say anything, Cas stepped back once she was totally freed from the chains and saw that she was staring up at him with her mouth hanging open, so he asked if she was all right.

"Th-that's not your grace," she managed to sputter, her voice dry and hoarse from all the screaming she had done. Amriel was horrified and relieved at the same time and she had no idea how that was possible.

He had a grace that wasn't his- she could see it clearly, pulsing and glowing and full of heavenly intent, but it didn't give off the same light he once did. Castiel had stolen a grace, something that had never been done before, and she needed to know why he had done it.

Cas heaved a sigh and nodded, "I know. I only took it because I had to. I needed to get to you before they came back and I wouldn't have been able to if I was human. I didn't want to, Amriel, I swear. Do you think you can stand? I don't know how many there are guarding the exit."

The girl attempted to rise from the chair, only to stumble forward into Castiel's waiting arms. He hugged her tightly before pressing a kiss to her chapped lips, wondering how long it had been since he had last kissed her. Cas kept one of his hands on her waist and moved the other to her cheek, focusing his new grace and healing whatever he could and he felt Amriel flinch under his touch.

As soon as he was done, she backed away and stared up at him, pushing her hair out of her face and frowning. Castiel tilted his head to the side, confused by her sudden distance and he opened his mouth to ask for an explanation, but she cut him off.

"I- in the words of Marissa, I'm freaking out right now, Cas. I'm not sure what to feel- whose was it?" she asked quietly, moving back when he tried to take a step towards her. "Don't! Whose grace did you steal?"

"It was Theo's," he answered gently as he carefully approached Amriel, who was now backed against the wall. "I'm going to get my grace back, Elle. But we have to leave this place now. Can you walk?"

Amriel couldn't handle this. She looked at Cas and all she could see was Theo's bright grace staring back at her. It looked angry, almost. Upset by its current host. How was she supposed to look at him now? She shook her head, trying to get rid of the thoughts that were racing through her mind and the disgust that she felt towards the grace that resided inside Castiel.

He was still just Cas and that's what mattered. She just had to push aside everything her weak grace was doing to get her to run away from him. When he wrapped an arm around her waist she felt her grace surge just barely, almost like it was trying to fight him off. Amriel repressed the feeling and returned the gesture, leaning against his side and letting him support her weight.

They walked out the door and Amriel gasped when she saw Theo and Muriel's bodies on the floor. Cas tightened his grip on her momentarily before letting go, "Others are coming. Please, stay back."

Amriel watched as three angels, including Urim, entered the room, and all she could do was stare in horror as Castiel killed them all. Urim had been last, and Cas had made sure it was a painful death. He had deserved nothing less for what he had done to Amriel, and Cas enjoyed watching the white light disappear from Urim's host.

"Come, Elle. We have to leave now," Cas said in a rushed tone, like he hadn't just killed three of their own. He took her hand and led her out of the building they had been held captive in.

"I have to call Dean and tell him that Ezekiel isn't the angel possessing Sam. He was killed in the Fall," Cas said as they walked through the parking lot. "We'll steal one of these cars and drive until we're a few towns away, then figure out what to do from there."

Where did this confident Castiel come from? He spoke with such an authority that Amriel wondered if she even really knew him.

"I'm sorry I didn't know it wasn't him," she apologized quietly. "I'd never met Ezekiel, so I wouldn't recognize him either way."

"It isn't your fault, Elle. We just need to figure out who's inside Sam and why he lied about his name."

Once they were on the road, Cas drove until they found a gas station with a payphone.

"Please stay here while I call Dean. Will you be all right alone for a few minutes?"

Amriel nodded, pulling her knees up to her chest and leaning her head against them. She watched Cas walk away, wondering if she truly was okay.

Cas dug through his pockets and found enough change to place a call, and he dialed Dean's number before holding the phone up to his ear. Once he picked up, the angel immediately spoke, "Dean, I don't have a lot of time, so listen. The leader of the opposition is an angel called Malachi."

"How do you know that?" Dean asked, an impressed tone coloring his voice.

"He had us. Amriel and I were tortured, but we got away."

"How?" There was that word again. How?

"I… I did what I had to do. I became what they've become- A barbarian."

"Is Amriel okay? Is she with you? Where are you?"

Castiel glanced through the open door of the phone booth and saw the blonde staring into space blankly, and he felt a wave of concern wash over him.

"Yes. She'll be okay. It's better if we stay away, though. They're gonna want me even more now. But we'll be all right. I… I got my grace back. Well, not mine per se, but it'll do," he rambled on, before realizing that he only had a limited amount of time on the phone.

"Wait, you're— you're back? You got your mojo?"

"I'm not sure. But I am an angel." Cas couldn't get the look in Amriel's eyes when she first saw him with a grace out of his head. She had been afraid of him, he knew it…

"And you're okay with that?"

"If we're going to war, I need to be ready."

The Winchester paused for a split second before heaving a sigh, "Cas…"

"Dean, there's something else."

"What?" Dean asked impatiently and Castiel almost rolled his eyes.

"Didn't you say Sam was healed by an angel named Ezekiel?"

"Uh, yeah. Why?"

"Ezekiel is dead."

"What?"

"He died when the angels fell…"

Dean said a quick thanks and hung up after telling Cas to be safe.

Cas placed the phone on the receiver and walked back to the car, and the two angels continued their drive in silence until Amriel turned on the radio and fiddled with the dial.

The sounds of the Top 40 hits floated through the speakers of the gold Lincoln Continental they had taken, and Cas focused on the open road ahead of him while the blonde played with the hem of her torn shirt.

"I want to go home, Castiel," she said quietly, unable to take her eyes off of his hands as they grasped the steering wheel. He turned and looked her over, taking in her small demeanor and frowning at the sight of her grace. He ached knowing that it was his fault and all he wanted to do was fix her.

"I know… We'll find Metatron and reverse the spell so we can unlock Heaven, I promise you that." He saw that she was shaking her head and he raised a dark eyebrow, confused by her reaction.

"Not Heaven. The motel. Our motel, where we've been safe from all of this. If that is how angels act now, I want nothing to do with it. Heaven will never be the same after what's happened."

Cas understood what she meant, and he felt a similar way. If Heaven was restored, would he even be welcomed back? Would he even want to go? Now that she mentioned it, though, Amriel's idea seemed like a good one. It'd be easy to just drop everything and return to Idaho- to the Gas-N-Sip and Marissa. But he had to do whatever he could to deal with Metatron first. Then he would figure out what to do after that.

"We shouldn't have left in the first place. If I had known we would be abducted and they would torture you-" his usually deep voice cracked, unable to look at her knowing he'd have to see her dull grace and the blank look on her face. She was more upset than she was letting on, and he could tell. "I should've gotten to you sooner."

He heard Amriel gasp and that's when he spared her the smallest glance. She was staring at him with an open mouth, her eyes wide with confusion as she shook her head.

"I'm the one that was supposed to protect you. It's my duty- God himself told me to watch you and I let Malachi torture you." Amriel was starting to fall apart. Her heart was racing and her breath was coming in short, shallow rasps. Her stomach was churning and she felt bile rising in her throat.

She had failed, and that's not something angels did.

Theo's grace was overwhelming her, the thought of Castiel taking what wasn't his.

"Pull over, please. I ca-can't breathe."

Amriel was out the door as soon as the car had pulled to a stop, then she hurtled towards the grass where she landed on her hands and knees before she threw up, choking and gasping as she dry heaved. She didn't even realize that Cas had followed her until she felt him moving her hair out of her face and rubbing her back soothingly. It felt better to be out in the open air, especially after being trapped for days and the confinement of the car. When she finally sat back on her shins, she saw that he was kneeling beside her, a look of concern written all over his face and he asked, "Are you okay?"

Was she okay? She had no idea. All she knew was that she had failed and as a result Castiel had stolen another angel's grace. So many things were running through her mind and she still felt a little sick, but she nodded anyways.

"I think I'm the first angel to ever vomit," she said, managing the send him a small smile and it only widened when she saw the way his eyes lit up as he rose from the ground. Amriel made an attempt to stand, but she faltered and Cas was quick to catch her. He held her tightly against his chest and pressed a kiss to the top of her head like he always did. Standing there on the side of the highway, Amriel could hear his heart beating in his chest and she closed her eyes to block out the grace emanating from him. Maybe that was contributing to her upset stomach, but she wasn't positive. They stood like that, wrapped in each other's arms for a few minutes before Cas squeezed her shoulders and held her at arm's length, asking if she was ready to go.

"I'm ready," she said with a nod, letting him take her hand and walk her back to the car. Cas made sure she was comfortably seated and buckled before he shut the door and getting in the driver's side. They were back on the road, heading for the bunker Castiel had mentioned earlier when they were searching for a car to steal. He knew that's where Sam and Dean would be, and Cas felt like he had to go and see if he could offer any help to the Winchesters, but they had to pick up a few things first.

They returned to the motel they had been abducted from and retrieved their belongings before driving to a different one a few hours away, just to put some distance between them and Malachi. Cas wanted to keep driving through the night, but Amriel was growing restless in the car and he didn't want her to get sick again. So here they were, a small room with a king sized bed and a fuzzy tv, but it was all they needed.

Castiel wasn't tired whatsoever, and he found himself missing the sensation. It surprised him because Amriel was exhausted. He figured that it was just her grace trying to regenerate, but that didn't explain the past months they had been together. He felt no hunger or fatigue, but she slept and ate on a somewhat regular basis. Perhaps it was because she was a different level of angel, or the fact that her grace had been so damaged during the fall, or maybe she just wanted to fit in and appear human- he couldn't be totally sure though.

Regardless of the fact that he didn't need to shower, he all but dragged Amriel into the bathroom and turned the water on, watching the steam fill the small room as he helped the sluggish girl undress before he disrobed as well. Ushering her into the shower, Cas had her stand under the stream of hot water as he poured shampoo into his palm.

"Turn around, please," his voice was soft and she did what he asked. Once her back was facing him, Castiel began to wash her long hair with more care than he had ever shown before as an angel. He watched the tiny bubbles begin to foam and he massaged her scalp, trying to ignore the dullness of her grace. Cas couldn't believe what Urim had done to her, and all he wanted to do now was take care of her. How could somebody hurt his Amriel? He was glad he had killed him, and would do it again in a heartbeat.

"Cas?"

He noticed that she sounded tired, but he heard a quiet moan escape from the back of her throat so he knew he was doing something right.

"Yes, Elle?" he replied, turning her around and tilting her head back into the stream to rinse her hair. She stared at him, but Castiel could tell that she wasn't really looking at him. "It's this grace, isn't it?"

Amriel was silent, her gray eyes searching his as she tried to figure out what to say. Was she supposed to be honest with him or should she lie? She thought about all of the movies she had seen where someone lies about what they're feeling, and how the lie is always found out in the end and the person that was lied to gets hurt. She didn't want to hurt Cas, so she knew she had to tell the truth.

"Yeah," she nodded, keeping her eyes on his the entire time she spoke. "I don't know how to see past it. Every time I look at you I see Theo's grace and I just don't know what to do because I can see it trying to reach out to mine or something. I have to keep it away because it isn't yours!" Her outburst caught Castiel off guard. That wasn't what he was expecting to hear whatsoever… He had no idea that the grace had been seeking hers out. Cas would have to keep himself in line from now on.

When angels' graces touched, it was powerful. Something that could destroy mountains. When it was an intimate touch, amazing things could happen. It was told that thousands of years ago two angels that loved each other more than God himself took vessels and met on Earth in South America. When their graces melded together momentarily during the throes of passion, the Amazon rainforest was created. One of the angels was killed during a battle and the other fled to Earth to be in solitude for the rest of eternity. They both knew this story well; it had served as a lesson against love during their formative years.

"Are you insinuating that if it were my own grace, you wouldn't mind?" He didn't want to read too much into it, but he knew the stories of angels being in love. They were taught that it never ended well, but he had never seen it for himself.

"I wouldn't mind at all," she shook her head and set both of her hands on his biceps. "I love you, Castiel. I want to be as close to you as possible, but only you. Not you with some other angel's grace. When we get it back, maybe we can re-plant the Amazon. But for now, I'll just settle for human intimacy." Amriel leaned forward and began trailing kisses along his neck and collarbone, eventually making her way up to his lips.