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Disclaimer: In no way do I have any rights to Supernatural or any of the characters you are familiar with. I only own Amriel and any OCs that pop up along the way.

Twenty Six: Separated

"I don't see why I have to stay here, Cas," Amriel complained as they stood on opposite sides of a long conference table in the office of the command center they had taken over in the recent weeks.

The angels had insisted that Castiel lead them, and he wouldn't do anything without Amriel by his side as his equal. At first they had been hesitant, but the angels agreed and things just went from there.

"We discussed this earlier. You need to oversee operations here while I follow this lead," Cas walked around the table so he was standing in front of Amriel, taking her hand and squeezing gently. "I'll only be gone for a day or two."

"I guess I could go that long without seeing you," she answered, trying to maintain her composure. This would be the longest time she had been without Cas, so she wasn't sure what she'd do without him around. "As long as you call or text when you can."

"I think I can manage that." Castiel smiled down at her, leaning in and pressing his lips to hers for a gentle kiss.

At first they had been hesitant to show any sort of affection towards one another in front of the group of angels that had become their followers. It had started off as just small touches to the shoulder or back, then it moved to holding hands and kisses to the forehead or cheek. They didn't actually kiss in front of the other angels, but their relationship was recognized and even envied by some.

Amriel knew that the other angels spoke about them, wondered about their relationship and how they could be so close. She hadn't even attempted to explain it, but she knew that they had questions.

"How do you know they'll listen to my orders without you here?" She was certain that the angels only did what she tasked them with because they didn't want to upset Castiel, and she didn't want them to ignore her just because he was gone.

"They respect you, Elle. We come as a pair, and they knew that when they agreed to follow us," Cas reassured her with a smile, taking her other hand and tangling their fingers together. "You just have to be firm in your actions and they will comply."

The blonde shrugged in response, unsure if they really respected her or if they just put up with her because they admired Castiel. He was going to go track down this lead on his own whether she liked it or not, so she decided to go along with it.

"I suppose you're right," she finally nodded. "I'll make sure things run smoothly here, and you handle the lead. Do you have everything you need?"

Amriel ran through a mental list and named them off, "Money, a change of clothes, cell phone, charger…" and Cas would nod after each one. She felt a little more at ease knowing that he was prepared.

"Okay, I guess you should get going then?" Amriel didn't really want him to go yet, but he was adamant about leaving as soon as he could.

"Yes, I should…" he trailed off, staring down at her with a look she couldn't place. Before she could question him, she felt his arms wrap around her waist as he pulled her into him, resting his head on top of hers. "I'll miss you, Elle."

Amriel stood in his arms, reveling in the warmth as she breathed in. She was always curious as to why he smelled like the forest, but she liked it nonetheless. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head before leaning back and kissing her gently, his chapped lips meeting hers for a long moment before he pulled away completely.

"It's time for me to go. Walk me to the car?" he asked, holding out his hand and smiling when she took it.

The pair left the conference room and walked through the headquarters, making brief eye contact and nodding to whoever they passed on their way out of the building. They stood beside the Lincoln Continental and Amriel watched Cas jingle the keys in his right hand.

"Call me when you can, okay? And if you need me, let me know and I'll get to you as soon as possible." Amriel rambled on nervously, only stopping when Cas leaned in and kissed her, effectively shutting her up.

"I will, I promise," he reassured her, setting his hand on her shoulder and squeezing gently as he smiled down at her. "You'll be fine. I love you, Amriel."

She nodded, staring up at him with the most confident look she could muster, "I love you too. Now, get out of here before I change my mind and drag you back inside."

With a laugh, Cas gave her one more kiss and got into the car, starting it up and waving as he pulled out onto the road. Amriel heaved a sigh and took a minute to compose herself. The last thing she needed was to look weak in front of the angels that had chosen to follow them.

"I can do this," she muttered to herself. "It's just a few days. Keep it together until Cas gets back."

Amriel took a deep breath and smoothed out her hair, then she headed back into the base with her head held high, walking over to a group of angels that were huddling around a map laid out on a table.

"Any signs of Metatron on Earth?" she asked, catching them off guard.

The four angels looked up at her, then to each other as if trying to figure out who should speak up.

"I asked a question, don't make me repeat myself," Amriel narrowed her eyes at the four of them, setting her hands on her hips and widening her stance like she had seen others do to command respect.

"No, we haven't heard of anything new," Daniel finally spoke up for the others. "Has Castiel left to follow the lead he found?"

"Yes, he just left a few minutes ago. I'll be the only one in charge until he returns." She looked at each one of the angels, her gaze lingering for a few moments before settling on Daniel. "Now, please return to your duties. I don't want us to waste time when we could be searching for Metatron."

Amriel walked away from them and headed into the office she and Cas shared, sitting at the desk and turning on the computer so she could get started on some research of her own.

She wanted to find Castiel's grace, but she wasn't quite sure where to start. If the Men of Letters' notes were correct, she could possibly extract remnants of it from Cas, but that might mean he'd have to expel Theo's. Shaking her head, Amriel heaved a sigh. She was in way over her head here- there's no way she could handle this group of angels on her own.

A buzzing on the desk snapped Amriel out of her thoughts, and she glanced down at her phone to see a message from Marissa.

Guess who moved to NYC! Come visit me soon, babe. xoxo

Attached was a selfie of the redhead in the middle of Times Square, and Amriel smiled. She was glad Marissa had made the move and didn't stay with her ex-boyfriend. Picking up the phone, she typed back a message, asking for her new address and telling her friend that she was excited for her.

Amriel longed for the days where she and Cas worked at the Gas-n-Sip, stocking shelves and speaking with customers. But most of all, she missed staying up late with Castiel, talking about their days and kissing occasionally, exploring each other's bodies without a care in the world. She wondered what would've happened if they hadn't gone to check out that massacre at the biker bar. Would Cas still be human?

With a frown, Amriel quickly dismissed the thought. It didn't matter- they had gone, and Castiel was an angel again. They were committed to finding Metatron and opening Heaven.

"Excuse me, Amriel?" a hesitant voice came from the doorway, and the blonde looked up to see Mihr standing there. He was in the vessel of a man in his late twenties, with sandy blonde hair and bright, green eyes. Mihr wore a suit that was slightly too big for him, but it seemed to work for his lanky figure.

"Yes, Mihr? Please, come in." Amriel closed the laptop and watched him enter the room, closing the door behind him before he sat down in the chair on the opposite side of the desk.

"I'm sorry to bother you, but I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions." He seemed nervous, avoiding eye contact with her at all cost.

Amriel told him to go ahead, that he could ask anything he wanted.

"I— the others have been talking, about you and Castiel. What does it feel like to love?"

The blonde was silent, staring at Mihr and trying to figure out what to say. She wasn't really sure what love felt like, really… She just knew that she loved Castiel with all of her being.

"Um, that's a rather difficult question to answer. It's unlike anything I've ever felt in my entire existence. There are many emotions I've felt in my time on Earth, but love, and loving Cas, is the best one."

"Why Castiel?"

Mihr's question caught her off guard, and Amriel frowned, furrowing her eyebrows and, unsure of what he meant.

"What do you mean, Mihr?"

"Out of every being in Heaven and every human on Earth. Why choose Castiel?" Mihr clarified, and she shook her head.

"I didn't choose him… It doesn't work like that," Amriel frowned slightly, "I'm not even sure how it works. I just.. he makes me feel so much. Castiel frustrates me, he makes me angry, but he also makes me smile and he understands me. Love isn't just one emotion. It's all of them, I think."

When Mihr didn't reply, Amriel asked if he had any more questions. He shrugged and remained silent for a few seconds before asking if he would love someone too.

"Mihr… Everyone is capable of love. You'll know when it happens," she smiled, tucking her hair behind her ears. "Maybe once we find Metatron and open Heaven, we can have some human experiences. Have you ever been to a bar?"

"A bar? Amriel, inebriation is a sin!"

The blonde laughed, wondering if she had been the same way when Cas was explaining things to her. She shook her head and grinned, "Oh Mihr, you have so much to learn. I'm so glad you're here with us."

"I'm glad to be here. You and Castiel are good leaders. We all believe in the cause, and we'll do whatever it takes to apprehend Metatron."

Amriel was surprised by his words, but she could tell by the determined look on his face that he was telling the truth.

Cas had found Hannah in a factory a few states over from where the headquarters was located. He had discovered that angels were trying to recruit others to join Metatron, and he had healed her of her injuries. Apparently there had been sort of siren calling to angels and luring them to the warehouse where they were killed, all but Hannah, apparently.

Hannah had taken a rather plain vessel, Castiel had noticed. The woman had shoulder length, brown hair and bangs that covered her forehead. Her features were angled, and Cas couldn't help but compare her to Amriel, whose features were far more delicate.

He also found out that one of the angels working for Metatron was Gadreel, so he had called the brothers to tell them the news.

"Gadreel? Gadreel is working for Metatron? For how long?" Sam's voice came through the phone as Cas entered his motel room.

"I don't know," he answered, setting the room key down on the desk.

"So, Metatron made Gadreel kill Kevin?" It was Dean speaking on the other line now, and Cas slipped out of his shoes and tucked them under the desk out of habit.

"It would explain a lot, and there have been no new prophets, which Metatron could have fixed to his advantage."

"And Gadreel said that angels are returning to Heaven? How? I thought that the spell was irreversible." Dean seemed confused, and Sam took continued, "That's what Crowley said. Look, let's just find Gadreel and… beat some answers about of him."

"Yeah, here's something to start with that. Uh, hold on, I'm uh," Cas fumbled with his phone, pressing a few buttons as he spoke, "Elle showed me how to do this. I'm sending you a photo of the symbol that drew all the angels in."

When Sam confirmed that they got the picture, Cas went on, "It's acting as some kind of angel siren. I think it's a spell. The ingredients used to create it were very odd… Griffin feathers, bones of a fairy. I've never seen it before."

"Yeah, me neither. All right, let me see what I can find. What did Amriel have to say about this?" Sam asked, and Castiel frowned slightly.

"I haven't sent it to her yet. She's back at our headquarters, keeping things in order there," he stared at the honor bar mini fridge and muttered, "Honor bar. What's so honorable about a miniature bar in a motel room?"

"Everything," came Dean's serious response, making Cas smile.

"How are you, Dean?" he asked, moving to sit on the bed.

"I'm fine, Cas. How 'bout you?"

"I miss my wings," he answered wistfully, "Life on the road… smells. And I miss Amriel. She made traveling more enjoyable."

Dean chuckled and hummed before Sam cut in, saying that he got a match and that the symbol was the same as a few that were spotted at crime scenes of multiple homicides in Baker and Hill Valley, Utah.

Castiel was in Bishop Falls, Utah, and it looked like Gadreel was heading north. The next two big towns were Auburn and Ogden, so Sam and Dean would head to Ogden and Cas was going to take Auburn, and then they decided to meet in the middle.

When he hung up with the brothers, Cas briefly considered calling Amriel and telling her about his plans, but he didn't want to bother her if she was busy.

He went to bed that night with an ache in his chest that he couldn't identify the source of. His vessel was fine, he knew that much, but he wasn't sure why he felt off. Cas glanced over at his phone and picked it up, opening it up and squinting at the bright screen illuminating the dark room.

His background picture was one of Amriel and himself- he was wearing the suit he had gotten from Marissa while she was in that stunning coral dress he had grown so fond of, and they were standing with his arm draped over her shoulders while her's was around his waist, at a museum gala they had stumbled upon a month ago. As he stared at the photo, he realized the source of his pain.

He missed Amriel.

Cas frowned, something he had been doing a lot lately, and wondered if she was still awake. It was nearly 2 a.m., so he was sure she was curled up in bed, sleeping peacefully while he was restless. He contemplated sending her a text, half hoping that she would be awake and respond, just to put him somewhat at ease.

I hope all is well at headquarters. I shouldn't be gone much longer. I miss you.

He hit send and stared at the message for a few moments before navigating to a game on the phone and starting the next level.

Amriel had been tossing and turning for hours, unable to get comfortable.

She had gone to bed around 11:30, right when she got back from headquarters. It was strange coming back to the empty motel room, knowing she was going to be alone. Usually she would try to wait up for Cas, but tonight she wouldn't be able to.

Things had gone smoothly for the rest of the day, surprisingly. Details of her conversation with Mihr had apparently spread, and some of the other angels had been talking about emotions and what kinds of human activities they might like to try all day.

They hadn't come up with any new leads on Metatron's location, and she hadn't found out anything more about finding Cas's grace, but she was eager to get back to it in the morning.

The blonde was fed up with not being able to sleep. Throwing the covers off of herself, she got out of bed and grabbed a water bottle from the mini fridge.

Heaving a sigh, she knew there was no way she'd be able to sleep soundly without Castiel by her side. Amriel quickly found the remote and turned on the TV, flipping channels until she found a true crime show. She settled back under the covers and tried to count sheep, knowing it was something humans did when sleep evaded them.

After reaching two thousand, however, she figured it was a lost cause. Amriel ran through strategies and ways to draw out Metatron, and then she started thinking about what Heaven would be like when she finally returned— if she even returned at all.

Gone would be the camaraderie amongst the angels. Instead, there would be bitterness between those who followed Bartholomew and Malachi. Heaven was most likely in shambles, without having anyone there to keep things running. It would take a lot of work to restore it to what it once was, and Amriel wasn't really sure she wanted to deal with it unless she had Cas by her side.

How were they even going to get Metatron to reveal the entrance to Heaven? Would they torture him? Amriel didn't want to stoop down to that level, but if it was for the greater good and allowed the other angels to return, she would have to consider it.

Of course, there were a few things she wanted to do before returning to Heaven. She wanted to visit Marissa in New York, she wanted to get Castiel's grace back, and she wanted to make sure Sam would be okay without her presence. He could always pray to her, but she wanted to know he would be fine when she wasn't on Earth.

Just the thought of leaving Earth upset her. She liked experiencing all of these new things— Heaven was monotonous and boring after eons of existence. Suddenly her chest was tight and her eyes had started to water— no. She wasn't leaving just yet. She still had time to do everything on her list.

Amriel grabbed her phone, wanting to add something to the list, when she noticed it was approaching 4 a.m. She had hoped to hear from Cas, but he hadn't sent her anything to let her know where he was or how things were going. Perhaps he was busy or his phone died. He wasn't the best at keeping it charged, she thought to herself. Maybe she should try calling him.

Finding his number and pressing send, Amriel listened to the phone ring until she heard his voice filter through the speaker.

"I don't understand why… why do you want me to say my name?"

Next came the tone that signaled she was supposed to leave a message, so she did just that.

"Hey Cas, it's me… I just wanted to call and see how things were going on your end. Call back when you get the chance… Or at least text me so I know something hasn't happened to you. Love you… Bye."

Frowning, Amriel plugged her phone in out of habit and tossed it back on the table.

"I need to go to sleep," she mumbled to herself, pulling the comforter up over her face as she began to count sheep again.

Cas was getting ready to leave the motel to head to Auburn when the electricity started to flicker. He glanced around in confusion when the TV turned on by itself and a film called Casa Erotica 14 started to play.

A woman on the screen spoke, "Sometimes, you need a break from the hustle and bustle of city life. #amiright. Sometimes, you need #casaerotica."

"That's inappropriate," Cas said to himself, but his eyes were focused on the film nonetheless.

The woman on the screen got up and answered the door, and Castiel's eyes widened when he saw Gabriel wearing an obviously fake mustache.

"Hello. Remember me, bucko?" he ripped off his mustache, "Gabriel. I'm gonna take that as a yes."

He snapped his fingers and the TV went black. Cas turned around cautiously, tensing when he saw Gabriel standing before him.

"I need your help, brother."

"I thought you were dead," Cas said, confused as to what was happening.

"Please," Gabriel scoffed. "You can't take the trick out of the Trickster."

"So, I assume you faked your own death?"

"And I assume you weren't let into Mensa while I was gone," Gabriel said with a laugh.

When Cas asked Gabriel where he had been, the Archangel shrugged.

"Ohhhh you know, hither with a side of yon. I was hiding, Captain Side Eyes, in the safest place in the universe. Heaven. But then you and the two stooges had to go and ruin Christmas, now didn't you?"

"Sorry," Cas mumbled, looking down at his shoes.

"Oh cry me a river. Look, I dropped, I hid, I finally watched Downton Abbey. But then, your BFF Metatron sent his minions out looking for me. Apparently, he thinks since I'm an Archangel I have extra juice."

"And that you're a threat?"

"Yeah, but I got hurt in the fall too. Used most of my juice to get back into porn," Gabriel paused for a split second, "That came out wrong. So did that. Uhh, the point is, I've been on the run. But then, a few weeks ago, somebody started playing my song."

"The angel siren," Castiel said, thinking back to Hannah.

"No. The horn of Gabriel. One of Dad's little party favors that I never got around to messing with. Metatron dug it up and started blowing, so I came out of hiding."

Cas asked why, and Gabriel explained that there was safety in numbers, but Metatron was using it to trap angels instead of uniting them.

"It wasn't Metatron," Cas explained. "It was his second in command, Gadreel."

"Gadreel? That old chestnut? Wow!"

Castiel was growing tired of this, so he asked Gabriel what he wanted.

"Your help, Columbo. I'm getting the band back together. We're going on a kill Metatron tour, and you're looking at the new front man," Gabriel wiggled his eyebrows and Cas rolled his eyes.

"Come on, let's get going."

The two angels were on the road, Cas driving and Gabriel sitting shotgun as Castiel attempted to call Dean.

"This is Dean's other, other cell, so you must know what to do," the hunter's voicemail was followed by a loud beep, and Cas began to leave a message.

"Dean, it's me. I'm-"

He was cut off as Gabriel snatched the phone and chastised him, "Ho, whoa, whoa, whoa! Hands-free much? Both on the wheel. I'm precious cargo." Gabriel then addressed Dean via voicemail. "Hey, what's up shorties? Remember me, the guy who died for your sins? No, not the cat with the beard and the sandals… the hot one. Hey, thank you so much for the flowers and condolences. Really meant a lot to the fam. Any how, your boy toy and I are rolling our way towards your top-secret domicile. Call to discuss."

Gabriel hung up the phone and looked down at the screen, his eyes widening at the background picture.

"Well I'll be a monkey's uncle. You finally hooked up with Amriel? It's about time, brother!" The Archangel grinned, noticing Castiel tense slightly at the mention of her name. "She certainly picked a fine vessel for herself. I don't know what she sees in yours though— a little too tall, dark, and handsome for my tastes."

"She likes me for me, Gabriel, not my vessel," Cas grumbled.

"I'm sure it doesn't hurt, though. I always knew you two would shack up. It was just a matter of when…"

"I've been hearing that lately. You, Crowley… Is there something I'm not aware of?"

Gabriel merely shrugged and sent him a smirk as he said, "You'll find out when the time's right, little bro."

The ride was quiet for almost ten minutes when Cas finally spoke again.

"So, you've been back for months. What have you seen out there?"

"After it was raining winged men? Well, you know… Total nigh-biblical chaos. Crowley and Aba-douche duking it out. Good times," Gabriel chuckled. "Then there's our peeps, scattered like confetti."

"There has been a lot of confusion," Cas admitted and the archangel scoffed.

"You think? Most angels aren't like us, Castiel. They can't handle this whole free will thing. They're sheep, drones. But us?" Gabriel gestured between the two of them, "We're rebels… one without a cause, one with."

Keeping his eyes on the road, Cas shook his head, "I'm just a soldier."

"Bitch, please. You've been God more often than Dad has," Gabriel shot back, making Cas let out a laugh for the first time in what felt like forever.

"Yeah. Look how that worked out…"

"Well, go ahead then. Be a soldier all you want. I'm gonna need as many as I can get."

Gabriel explained that he was sick of running. He had run from God, from his fellow angels, from the Winchesters, and he didn't want to any more. So he was going to do what he was meant to do, and that was lead.

"Well, we need a leader. And I'm happy it's gonna be you," Cas said with a small smile, somewhat relieved that he and Amriel wouldn't have to do it.

"A little low on gas, aren't we?" Gabriel asked suddenly before looking out the window and Cas glanced down at the dash to see that the indicator was in fact almost to the E, which he now knew stood for Empty.

Cas took the next exit and pulled into a Gas-n-Sip, and the two entered the station. Looking around, Castiel noticed just how similar they all were. He knew where every item belonged on the shelves and he suddenly missed working at the one in Idaho.

"Ooh, smell that cancer. Delicious!" Gabriel said as he looked at all of the snacks lining the aisle. His head turned when he saw a truck pull up outside and people jump out and come towards the doors. "Uh… Remember the minions of Metatron I mentioned?"

The Archangel ran towards the doors and locked them, eyeing the minions as he backed away towards Cas.

"We'll never keep these guys out of here," Gabriel groaned.

"I know. So, we fight," Cas said firmly, reaching for his blade that was tucked away in his sleeve.

"No, I fight. I lied before. I never watched Downton Abbey… I was just trying to fit in," he confessed. "Oh, and I do have some Archangel juice left. I can hold these boneheads off long enough."

"Long enough for what?"

"For you to get out of here," Gabriel said like it was obvious, and Cas shook his head, saying that he wasn't going to leave him.

The two argued back and forth, and Cas told Gabriel that they would cut him to pieces.

"I can stall them long enough for you to amscray, and you can take my place. You and your lovely Amriel."

"What are you talking about," Cas narrowed his eyes, not liking where this was going.

"The angels need a leader, or well, leaders, and it's gotta be somebody like us… somebody different."

Castiel shook his head fervently, "No."

"I know you don't want this burden, Castiel. Neither do I." Gabriel sounded like he was pleading with the lesser angel, but Cas wasn't going to buy it.

"What if I fail again?" Cas stared down at the floor, memories of his betrayal and releasing the Leviathan flooding his thoughts.

"With Amriel by your side, you won't. You can't."

Cas suddenly pulled Gabriel into a tight hug, muttering, "Thank you." The archangel hugged back, telling him to shut up.

When their hug ended, Castiel turned to leave, going to tuck his blade back into his coat when he noticed something off. His coat, which had been torn earlier when he had found Hannah, was no longer ripped. It was perfectly fine. He turned back around to face the Achangel, suspicious of what was going on.

"Haven't got all day, hotpants," Gabriel said, tapping his foot impatiently, watching Cas stare him down with an accusing look.

"Was any of this real?" he asked, and Gabriel frowned. "What the hell are you talking about? Cas, go!"

When Castiel didn't move, the Archangel tried again, "So, what, we both die here?"

Cas approached Gabriel and thrust his angel blade into him quickly, frowning as it didn't do anything, "No. You're already dead."

"Well," Gabriel huffed, snapping his fingers and the minions that were breaking through the door disappeared. "What gave it all away?"

"My coat was torn earlier today."

"Ah, crap. I really hate continuity errors," Gabriel groaned, rubbing his temples in annoyance.

"So, none of this is real, and I'm guessing I'm no longer in the motel."

How long had he been gone for? Hours, days, weeks? Was anyone looking for him?

"Here's the thing… none of it was real, but all of it was true," Gabriel tried to explain and Cas shook his head sadly.

"Whose truth? Yours or Metatron's?"

Gabriel heaved a sigh, "Just hear him out, would you? He's just trying to help you."

Metatron? Help? It wasn't possible. Cas shook his head and asked how he could possibly be trying to help.

"Sorry, didn't read the whole script, just uh, skimmed for my parts. Well, it's good to see you, old bean-" Gabriel went to snap, but Cas stopped him before he could disappear.

"Wait. Are you dead?" he asked, watching the Archangel smirk and snap his fingers.

Everything disappeared and Castiel found himself gagged and tied to a chair in an unfamiliar room. He glanced around what looked to be a study or library of some kind, and he stilled when he spotted Metatron seated at a typewriter.

Metatron looked up and took off his glasses, a smile appearing on his face as he asked, "What makes a story work?"