Feedback: Pretty please with a cherry on top! Feedback and criticism (but only constructive) is welcomed and appreciated.
Disclaimer: None of it's mine except the storyline, Chuck and Lucille, Commissioner Newtown, Jonah, Ulrich, Doctor Muerte and Helena Daley. If it were, Angel wouldn't have left Buffy in the first place. This is therapy for me.
Rating: Pg - 13, for violence
Pairing: B/A, minor use of other ships e.g. W/O, S/F
Summary: AU. The whole gang are werewolves.
-#-#-
It was awkward.
So awkward she sometimes felt like crying. They had no idea how to treat her. Or rather they did.
Glass.
And though she ached to be treated the way that she'd been before it just wasn't working. They were uncomfortable around her, constantly treading on eggshells, avoiding talking completely about what had happened as though she would break down if they mentioned where she'd been and why.
She laughed bitterly to herself.
It seemed she was the only one who could confront what had happened and deal with it. The others had decided that ignoring the whole issue was the best way to handle everything. She sighed and ran her fingers through her hair, gazing out at the view from the roof of the hotel.
Things were so difficult now.
Every time she walked into a room the conversation died; she couldn't help but notice the way they watched her limp round the kitchen and then looked away when she tried to catch them. And Angel…
"Oh, Angel," she said, her voice resigned and angry.
The day she'd come home he'd put her in a spare guest room and then left, removing himself to their room down the hall. And that was what hurt most of all. That her husband couldn't stand to be in the same room as her. Infact he'd been avoiding her all week and her heart ached. Yesterday at breakfast she'd been making toast and had heard his footsteps coming into the kitchen. They'd stopped at the doorway and before she'd had chance to turn round, a smile fixed to her face, he'd left.
Tears stung the back of her eyes. Sometimes she wished they'd left her in that place and then she wouldn't have to face the loneliness they'd imposed on her. She sniffed miserably and chastised herself for being so pathetic. The door leading up to the roof suddenly creaked and Faith peaked her head round.
"There's a party happenin' down here ya know…ya gonna join us some time?"
Buffy managed an unconvincing smile, but it didn't matter – even Faith couldn't meet her eyes and was looking at a point over Buffy's shoulder. She tried to make her voice perky and wondered what the point was.
"Sure, I'll be down in a minute." Faith left and the door slammed shut with loud bang.
So now they were throwing a party.
It was supposed to be for her, but Buffy knew it was an excuse to try to lift the tension that had slowly been building up. Tomorrow Angel was to formally ask Ethan if he still maintained his challenge claim. If he did the two would fight and the victor would hold the title of Clan chief. There was no doubt that in light of recent events Ethan would back down – Angel had proved himself a capable leader, and she doubted that Ethan would want the position anymore, not with the trouble it seemed to entail anyway.
But that wasn't the problem.
The problem was that she knew that some of them now saw her as unfit to be the alpha female; people like Kate. She'd been sniffing at Angel all week like a bitch in heat and even if Angel now hated her, he knew it was completely inappropriate for Kate to be doing that while she still held the position they coveted so much.
She chuckled humourlessly to herself.
So along with the formal challenge tomorrow she knew Kate would ask for a bitches fight, and then try and claw her to death to win the privilege of bedding her mate. Except he wouldn't be her mate anymore if someone other than herself won. And Kate in particular was determined to beat her.
Buffy frowned.
Perhaps she'd been wallowing in self-pity for long enough. Maybe it was time to show just who exactly was in charge here and win Angel back. She smoothed the dark, red silk dress down and stood, checking her hair and walked down back to the ballroom; a beautiful room in the hotel, full of dark wood, mirrors and candle light. She'd show them all that she wasn't a push over, that no-one, no-one ground her down and that…
She came to an abrupt stop outside the ballroom, her eyes widening as she took in the sight before her, and she choked back a sob.
He was with her.
Kate.
Dancing, arms wrapped around her waist as they waltzed slowly to the music, as though they fitted perfectly together like pieces of a puzzle, her head resting easily against Angel's chest as he pulled her close.
She wanted to throw up. No, no, no, this wasn't happening, Kate couldn't have sunk her claws in so fast…but the truth was staring her in the face as they spun gently round the room.
Her face, a picture of abject misery she backed away in horror as Kate looked up, her eyes dancing, a smirk twisting the edges of her lips as she clung tighter to Angel who was seemingly oblivious to Buffy's presence or even existence. Gathering together all that she had left of her wounded pride like a cloak she wrapped herself up in self-loathing and fled upstairs.
Upstairs where the rooms were silent.
Where there were no dancing figures whirling about gracefully.
Where all was quiet and still.
Where Buffy finally broke down and sobbed.
-#-#-
It felt like an age, but was probably in reality perhaps five minutes. She had finally stopped crying, and her body now seemed shrivelled up, as though she'd poured forth all of her emotions and now had none left.
Nothing left to give.
Dry like the shell of a mummy, brittle as scorched bones she mechanically got up and fetched a small suitcase from out of a wardrobe. It was new and utterly characterless and she wondered how something so impersonal could hold all of her most treasured possessions. She folded clothes up in a sort of daze, neatly sorting them into piles and placing them gently in the suitcase, followed by her jewellery and makeup.
Trancelike she walked down the corridor towards their room, opening the door and stepping inside, ignoring the blast of familiar smells that assaulted her. The scent of Angel, of sleep, of them, mated, bodies entwined together still clung to this room, clinging like a faint summer fragrance. She touched the pillows lightly, fingertips trailing across the silky blue sheets in remembrance of happier times spent in this bed…
Leaving it abruptly as though burned, she picked up several photos. The twins. Xander fooling around. The gang on Christmas day. Her mother. Giles and Jenny smiling sweetly at the camera. She put them back down softly, gazing at them mournfully. She straightened and twisted her claddagh ring, unsure even now if she should, could, keep it. Shaking her head, knowing it would be an unnecessary reminder of the pain she felt, she resolutely slipped it off, leaving it on the dresser table. She turned to hurry back to her room, to leave before her resolve crumbled and only then noticed him, leaning against the door, his eyes narrowed, whole body trembling in anger.
"What is this?" He said dangerously softly, slinging her half filled suitcase onto their bed.
She jumped as it landed on the bed, its contents spilling out, and she glanced nervously at him and at the closed door he was leaning against.
No escape.
Suddenly Angel's eyes found the claddagh on the table, his eyes flitting to her empty fingers twisting in front of her and suddenly he had moved in an eye blink, invading her personal space, so that she had to back up against the hard wall.
"Buffy." She would not make eye contact. She would not. She would…
"Look at me." Her eyes, traitors, moved up to meet his hard steely ones, a faint glimmer of gold telling her his beast would likely be rearing his head tonight.
She did not want to have this conversation. She wanted to get out now. And yet she didn't move, frozen to her spot.
"What do you think you're doing? Where do you think you're going?"
"I…"
She wanted to say something, anything, but the words were dying in her throat and she needed to go, damn it she was not going to have this conversation. She pushed him hard; so hard that he fell onto the bed and ran for the door. She almost reached it, but found that he'd already gotton there before her, slamming it closed before she could open it more than a crack. She was pushed up against the door, his arms either side of her head and he growled fiercely.
"You're not running now, Buffy, you're telling me what is going on or so help me I will make you, because I will not lose you again, do you understand?"
Feeling all of her anger swiftly rising to the surface, she allowed her eyes to glow their familiar golden colour.
"No, you listen Angel," she hissed. "I've had just about enough of being ignored, treated like I'm some fragile little thing that's gonna break. And then tonight seeing you practically mate with that tramp on the ball room floor! If you think I'm gonna stick around to see you lower yourself to her then you are sadly in need of a wake up call cos there is no way that I'm staying here." She snorted. "You think I enjoy being humiliated like that?"
"I was trying to give you time to adjust," he bit out angrily.
"By isolating me? I woke up every day in a bed which wasn't ours, thinking my own husband now found me so repulsive he couldn't even be in the same room as me anymore!"
"I was trying to help you! Dammit Buffy, when you were in hospital you looked so fragile just lying there…"
"And now you think I'm still in hospital, treating me like I'm a porcelain doll!" She started to move but Angel gripped her arms tightly but gently, like he was holding a very precious vase.
"Angel. Move."
"If you think I'm letting you go, you've got another thing coming."
"Now."
"What about the kids, you were just going to leave without even saying goodbye?"
She closed her eyes and sighed. "That wasn't fair, Angel."
"No," he growled. "It's perfectly fair, you were just going to dump them and move on, was that it? Find someone else and become their sl…"
She wrenched her arm out of his hold and slapped him, the crack echoing across the room like gunshot, his head snapping back with the force.
"How dare you!"
"So that's the way you wanna play it," he said, his eyes flashing darkly, teeth elongating. "Fine we'll do it your way."
Without any warning he threw her onto the bed; landing on her suitcase she flipped over and shifted too, her lips pulled back in a snarl, revealing sharp white teeth.
'Screw you Angel.' Her voice reverberated in his head, stinging in it's intensity. He smirked.
'Later my love – though if I had known this was about you not getting any we could have sorted this out ages ago.'
Furious, she leapt at him, but he dodged to the left, his body knocking over the dressing table chair as he moved to escape her wrath.
'What is this Angel? Find you get bored of treating me like a pretty ornament and now you wanna knock me around? Can we say psycho?'
She felt Angel chuckle in her mind and her hackles rose.
'I think, love, that you were the one to attack me first. I call it self-defence.'
She smirked. 'If you call fighting me self-defence then Ethan will slaughter you tomorrow.'
Angel's smile slipped a little. 'He wouldn't dare challenge me.'
It was Buffy's turn to laugh. 'He would if I decided to support him…say, oh I don't know, become his mate and alpha female.' Her mocking laughter was causing Angel's blood to boil. 'After all I could do with a change of bed partner, I mean honey, you're just not doing it for me anymore – I think I need a wolf, not a puppy.'
'And we're back to the sex.'
Buffy mentally pouted, drawing on her inner bitch to hurt Angel as much as he had hurt her.
'Surely you realised that I was only keeping you 'round till I found some one better?'
She gasped mockingly as she received silence from him. 'Aw, didn't you know that I wasn't really enjoying it?'
'Buffy.' The word was a command to shut up, but she was enjoying herself far too much to listen to him, determined to bruise his male ego.
'I mean sure, you were alright, but haven't you noticed that Ethan is that much…'
'Don't say another word.'
She licked her lips deliberately and savoured the last word. '…bigger.'
Incensed he jumped, Buffy leaping at the same time, so that they both met in mid air over the bed, claws digging into sleek fur and they landed, the suitcase kicked out of the way causing it to fall to the floor. They scrambled for dominance, one on top, then the other, bedclothes ripping as the two animals fought, fangs and claws ruining silk sheets. A pillow punctured and a mass of downy feathers flew into the air, floating around like a massive white snowstorm.
She refused to concede to him, hurt over what he'd done and he in turn demanded complete submission, livid over what she'd said. There was a blur as they battled; each one getting as many blows in as they could, frustration marking each movement.
Finally, panting she yielded, baring her throat in reluctant surrender.
'Bastard,' she breathed angrily.
Angel said nothing but nuzzled her neck and accepted her hesitant compliance, biting down, marking her as he had done all those years ago in Sunnydale. In unspoken agreement they changed back to human form, limbs tangled together in the now ruined bed, Buffy pinned underneath him, blonde hair splayed out, green eyes hard.
"You know you haven't won," she bit out.
"Oh, I have beloved," he said, and though his tone was gentle, his eyes were blazing with fire. "You are my mate, mine, and I will never let you go, and Ethan will never touch or taste you, unless you both fear for your lives."
"But you'll take Kate as what, your whore on the side?"
Angel sighed and rolled onto his back, gazing up at the ceiling. Buffy moved onto her side, propping her head up with her fist, drumming her fingers against torn sheets.
"You know Kate means nothing to me – she's only trying to get under your skin – she only wants to secure in her mind that tomorrow she will have a chance of beating you in the fight. The more she upsets you the easier it is for her."
He rolled to face her now and traced the shape of her face with the tips of his fingers. "When I thought I'd lost you…"
He gently kissed her nose, her cheeks, butterfly kisses down her jaw to finally capture her mouth, brushing his lips against hers. He pulled away and frowned.
"Don't ever do that to me again, love."
He paused and reached behind him with remarkable accuracy to pick up the claddagh ring, silver glinting in the dim light. He reached for her left hand, and she sat up, allowing him to take it, small slender fingers caught in his large palm. He slipped it on, sealing it with a kiss to her ring finger.
He looked up, and her eyes were slightly glassy, big green orbs starting to fill with tears.
"Buffy, please don't cry, I hate it when you cry." She collapsed into his arms, shaking, her arms wrapped tightly around his neck, face buried into his chest.
"I thought you didn't love me anymore, I thought, I thought…"
"Ssh, love, it's going to be alright." He kissed the top of her head, holding her in his arms until she fell asleep.
-#-#-
Downstairs the party was coming to an end, but the fighting had only just begun.
"Well, where the hell has he gone?" Asked Kate, her eyes boring into Faith's, who was slouched casually on a chair, dangling a wine glass from one hand, and a cigarette from the other.
"How should I know, K, I'm not his keeper." She wiggled her eyebrows. "He's probably gone to do the dirty with B."
She raised her glass in a mock salute. "To Angel and Buffy, may you always be able to make up with a good, hard, screw." There was a chorus of disgust from Conner and Dawn, but Faith merely smirked.
"Sorry kiddies, but you shoulda been in bed long ago, so it's your own fault."
She took a drag from her cigarette and raised an eyebrow at Kate, who looked ready to blow. Her hands curled into fists at her side she marched over to Faith and hauled her up by her right arm, fingers bruising into her skin.
"Listen, in that fight tomorrow I'm going to wipe the floor with Buffy's ass and Angel will be mine." Kate let go of her arms and stepped away, a triumphant look on her face. "You'll see."
Faith merely smiled and blew out the smoke into Kate's face. Narrowing her eyes she stormed off the ballroom floor, slamming the doors behind her, making Tara jump. Doyle wrapped a comforting arm round her and she smiled gently at him.
"Wow," said Faith. "What a bitch." Tara tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and shook her head.
"She's ambitious, and since she k-knows she won't be g-getting anywhere with Ethan, she wants a quick way to the t-top."
Giles took off his glasses and wiped them, a comforting action – he didn't actually need them at all, werewolves had brilliant eyesight, but he still wore them out of sentimental value, a reminder of his humanity.
"Tomorrow will not be a pleasant day, I fear."
Xander laughed humourlessly.
"And the nomination for the most obvious statement of the year goes to G-Man."
Giles frowned. "How many times do I have to tell you, Alexander, not to call me that."
Xander shrugged. "Till I get bored of calling you it."
Willow sighed. "Guys we're getting off topic. Is there anything we can do to stop Kate from competing?"
Giles shook his head. "The laws are very clear Willow, if she calls for it then Kate can instigate a Bitches match, and I doubt that she will be the only one who joins in." He shot a discreet glance over at Gwen, who was talking with Penn and Gunn in a corner.
"Great," said Xander sarcastically. "So we're gonna have loads of fun."
-#-#-
So the next instalment is the last chapter folks, though if it's needed there might possibly be an epilogue.
Lots of love
emerald sorceress.