A/N: Sorry for the long wait for this chapter. I haven't had internet access for a while and to add I've been pretty busy. Thank you once again for all your reviews and support :)

I know you're going to hate me for this chapter, but stay with me. Things will get better.

"He... he... what?" I choked, my mouth open in disbelief. My eyes were wide and fixed upon Fydev, searching for answers that he could not give. Why would they ask him to do this? No, wait, I knew the answer to that one. Why did Gippal give in to them? And, more importantly, why didn't he tell me about it?

To be honest, I really did not know what to feel. Was I supposed to be angry? Well, I guess I was a little angry. About what, I was not completely sure. I knew it was unfair to be angry at Gippal for what his elders told him to do. I guess I just felt deceived, you know? He didn't tell me about this, and I felt left out.

I guess that's how he felt when I told him about Rei.

I sighed. There was no use being really angry at Fydev or Gippal. I was just... a little upset. Confused. Worried.

Hell, I didn't know what I was.

"I'm so sorry, Rikku... I'm so sorry I had to be the one to tell you this."

I gave him a small smile. "Don't worry, it's okay. I was the one who made you tell me, anyway." I sighed again, then looked at Rei who was skipping around in the sand, keeping herself entertained. "Well, I should probably get going."

"Oh, me too. I'm late for a meeting." Fydev gave me a wave and a smile before leaving. "I'll see you guys around."

"Okay," my voice came in a whisper as he walked past. I called over to Rei and she bounced over to me, her hand finding mine. She talked up a storm while we walked home, but I remained mostly silent. I was too distracted to do much else.

The night passed and the next day came as usual, with nothing really out of the ordinary. Dad mentioned something about Nhadala wanting to see me, probably for some work, but I told him that I would look for her tomorrow. I had a feeling that I would not be in the mood to see her that day, or have much social interaction at all. My mind was set on what I was going to say to Gippal. To be honest, I really had no idea what I was going to say or how I was even going to bring it into a conversation.

The uneventful morning was eventually followed by afternoon, and I knew I would have to go see him soon. I decided not to bring Rei with me... I didn't want her to be there if we ended up getting into an argument or something. Both Gippal and I could say some pretty bad things when we want to.

The walk to his office was pretty normal. There weren't that many people walking around and I managed not to bump into anybody on the way there. I waved to his receptionist and walked up the stairs, hoping he would be in his room. He wasn't, but the door was left open. I flipped on a light and sat down on his bed, waiting for him to come back.

I sat there, staring into nothing, for about twenty minutes before Gippal came back. I heard him coming down the hall, and I turned my head to see him walk right in. He stopped when he saw me and gave me a smile. He looked around the room and his smile faded when he realized that Rei was not with me.

"Rikku... where is Rei?"

"I didn't bring her."

"Is something wrong? Is she okay?" Gippal sat down next to me, concern showing in his voice.

"No, she's fine. Gippal... we need to talk."

"Oh." He looked down at the floor and put his hands on his knees. I wondered, for a moment, if he knew.

"I ran into someone from the council yesterday, on my way home," my eyes fixed on the wall. Gippal remained motionless next to me, still looking down. "He knew who I was... he asked me if I had accepted your proposal," I swallowed and looked up at the ceiling. I could hear Gippal shift uncomfortably next to me and I guessed that he knew what I was talking about. There probably wasn't a need to keep going, but I kept talking anyway. "When I asked him what he meant, he got all nervous and didn't want to tell me. He said that he was surprised that I didn't know," I closed my eyes slowly and sighed. "I eventually made him tell me. He said that you were supposed to ask me to marry you."

Gippal was silent. I heard him shift his arm and run his hand through his hair. He didn't know what to say, and he kept moving around nervously. It was then that I started to feel kind of bad for telling him, and for making Fydev tell me.

"I'm sorry you had to hear about it that way," Gippal's voice was quiet and unwavering, his eyes closed and facing the ceiling.

"Could you tell me what's going on? Why didn't you tell me about this?" I let a little bitterness escape into my voice. I was starting to feel a little hurt. I'm sorry? Was that all he had to say?

"I was going to tell you, Rikku. I swear. I just... never found the right time." He looked down at the floor, his elbows resting on his knees and his fingers in his hair. "The council was very adamant about this whole marriage thing. They told me that they wanted me to ask you, and if you accepted we would announce it at the concert. You've got to remember, Rikku, that these council guys are all still pretty old-fashioned and they think that marriage is the right thing for us... the only thing for us."

"Do you think it's the right thing?" I asked quietly.

There was a pause, and Gippal sighed. "I'd like to get married, Rikku. I love you and I'd love for you to be my wife and we could finally be a family, you know?" He looked at me, his eyes gentle and moist. "I just... I didn't know if you'd be ready. When I proposed to you, I didn't want it to be like this. I wanted to do it right, when it was the right time."

There was another long period of silence. I was letting everything he said sink in as I processed my thoughts before he spoke again.

"I want to get married, Rikku. And I'm sorry that this isn't the most romantic way to do it, but I promise I'll propose to you the right way sometime. I know it won't be the same, but we can make this work, Rikku. We love each other and we can do this. I want to marry you, Rikku... I want you to be my wife."

My eyes grew wide and my mouth opened slightly in shock. Did he... he just... proposed to me... what? My mind was swirling with thoughts, and I didn't know what to say. I didn't think he would actually want to get married. I mean, now? It had been barely a week that we had been back together, there were still things to sort through, it was just... it was all too soon. I loved him, but this... I needed more time. "Gippal... I... I don't know what to say."

"What do you mean?" Gippal sounded nervous.

I stood up, shock still evident on my face. I could feel my hands shaking. "Gippal... it's just... it's too soon, Gippal. I can't." I let out a small whimper, and I felt helpless and confused and hurt and scared and so many things and I didn't know what to do or say or think.

"Rikku... I... Rikku." My name escaped his lips in a sigh, and I took one look at his bright green eyes and knew I had hurt him.

"It's not that I don't love you, it's just... too soon. I can't do this, Gippal. I can't. I love you so much, Gippal... please don't hate me." Tears streamed down my face and I looked down, afraid to meet his eyes. Afraid to see how much I was hurting him.

He turned away from me and let out a sigh. "I could never hate you, Rikku. It's just... I don't know." He looked at the ground and ran a hand through his hair. "I don't know."

I couldn't stop myself from crying. I felt so bad, and I knew I was letting him down, I just couldn't get married. Not now. It was just too early, you know?

Not now. I just couldn't.

I walked out of the room, afraid that more words from me would upset him even more. I knew that both of us needed to think for a while and now was not the time to talk about it when it was all so fresh and we were still distressed like this.

I walked out of the building, not bothering to wipe away any tears that fell. I didn't look at anyone, but I was probably receiving looks due to my distressed appearance. I didn't care. That didn't matter right now.

I stepped out into the warm afternoon air where the wind was causing dust to swirl around and I could feel it getting in my hair and face. I squinted and made my way through the empty street, not sure of where I was going. I didn't feel like going home right now.

I walked for a while until I reached the edge of the Home, and then I knew where I was going. Despite the sand blowing all around I could still see it in the distance, and I smiled. It was still in the same place.

It was a fairly large, abandoned machina tucked away near the sand. I used to go there and hide under it like it was a cave when I was a kid. It sounds kind of dumb, but it was a little special place of mine that I used to have. I could escape here, sheltered from the weather, and just let the world float away.

I was approaching it when I heard a familiar voice calling me from behind. I turned around to see him barely visible in the blowing sand.

"Fydev?" I called out, squinting in the distance. What was he doing here?

He walked toward me, and I quickly turned around. I didn't want him to see me like this, and I really wasn't in the mood to talk to anybody. "Rikku?" He walked up to me and stopped a few feet behind me. "Rikku? What are you doing? Are you okay?"

I put my hands over my eyes and tried to make my tears stop. They wouldn't though... they just kept falling and I cried, feeling very helpless and out of control.

"Rikku?" He placed his hand on my shoulder softly. I opened my eyes and he gently turned me around to meet him. "Rikku? What's wrong?"

I didn't say anything. I didn't want to, and I thought that my distressed state would cause him to leave me alone. I didn't want to have to explain it all to him.

"Did you tell him?" His voice was quiet and gentle, and he sounded concerned. His eyes were transfixed on me and I looked up to see his face.

"Yes." I sniffled and wiped tears from my eyes. "He... he said he wanted to get married. It's just... I love him but it's all too soon, you know? I can't... " I started sobbing, and I hated myself for it. I couldn't believe how weak and emotional I was being, especially in front of Fydev.

"I'm sorry, Rikku." He held his arms out and pulled me toward him in a gentle hug. He rubbed little circles on my back and I cried into his shirt. "Shhh... it's okay... shhh," his voice was soft and comforting.

"I just... I can't." I whispered as my crying started to slow down. I didn't know if I was trying to convince him or me.

"Don't worry. Everything will be fine in the end." He whispered and pulled me in tighter. I just stood there, numb, as Fydev held me and spoke soothing words.

I sighed and closed my eyes. Why couldn't anything in my life be simple?