"Odi et Amo"

By: Predstavlenia Glazala Boga

See Prologue or Chapter 1 for warnings.

Chapter 2:

"Brother, you've been fiddling with that tie for ten minutes. I don't think it's going to get any straighter…" Alphonse Elric sighed at his elder brother's obsession with the Bow Tie. The smaller Elric had been adjusting his wardrobe as a whole for near on half an hour, and, as he was using Alphonse as a mirror, this was beginning to grate. It would have been bad enough if it was just Edward's anal retentiveness, but neither of them had ever worn a tuxedo before, and they were not quite sure where everything went.

"Bah. I should have just grabbed an official uniform. At least those things are easy to put on…" These were just words, though. His raven-haired love had told him to dress nicely, so only the best would do. He just wished there were more options for men. "All right, I'm ready. Let's hope these shoes are good for walking, 'cuz Headquarters is almost a mile away…"

"You know, brother, we have a little extra money. We could call a cab, or something…" Alphonse knew what his brother was about to say, though, and regretted even bringing it up.

"Al, our mother left us that money for our education and survival, NOT so we could waste it being lazy. Come on, now, a little walk never killed anybody…" He was not totally convinced of this last fact, but there was nothing to do for it. He was just about to walk out the door, when he saw something moving outside the window. He froze, and motioned for his younger brother to get down. As quietly as he could, he removed the white glove from his right hand, and transmuted part of his automail arm into a simple katar, as he had done many times before. He braced himself for the window, the door, or any part of the wall to explode inwards at any moment. It was because of this preparation that he was unsure what to do when he heard a knock at the door. He remained in a ready stance for a moment, hesitant. He then straightened, and opened the door a crack.

This was all the invitation Roy Mustang needed. He pushed the door the rest of the way open with a flourish, and looked down upon the tiny blonde. A sardonic grin crept onto his face as he saw Edward's katar-hand. "Oh, dear, Fullmetal. You weren't planning on jumping me, and having your way with me, were you? Well… alright. Just, please, be gentle…" Following this comment, he feigned a fainting spell, collapsing onto Edward, and knocking him to the floor.

Edward Elric had never blushed as furiously as he did that moment. This is nice, he thought, his mind going nearly blank for a moment. Then, he realized the predicament he was in, especially regarding the cleanliness of his outfit. He growled, and started smacking the older man. "GOD DAMMIT, ROY MUSTANG, I HATE YOU! GET OFF OF ME!" Eventually, his commanding officer acquiesced, and, after standing up and dusting himself off, offered a hand to the younger man. Bastard. You don't even know what you're doing to me. After a few moments of showing his defiance, Ed took the proffered hand, and stood up. He looked down at his tuxedo, and groaned. "Mustang, I just finished putting this on. Now it's all wrinkled, and dirty…"

Roy sighed. Petulant child. "We don't have time for you to fix it now. Get in the car, and I'll help you sort it out on the way. Don't wait up for us, Alphonse." The final statement was made to the younger brother, who was still attempting to hide, albeit not with any degree of success. His piece said, Roy ushered Ed into the waiting car, which was being driven by Havoc. Ed nodded brightly to the man with the two-toned hair, as he took his place in the back, with Mustang. They settled in, and Mustang started fussing with Ed's outfit.

Havoc watched them through the rear-view mirror, perhaps more intently than was safe. But this is an emergency, so it's okay. At least, that's how he justified it to himself; the woman he nearly ran over probably saw things differently. The more he watched, though, the clearer it became: They totally want each other! How could I have missed it? Thinking back, he remembered a few off-color jokes Fuery had made, which were surprising on multiple levels, and which hinted at this very thing. He sighed, cursing his own stupidity. Detective Havoc, right. I'm an embarrassment to my fake profession. At least I'm not a half-bad soldier… I think.

In the back, the Flame Alchemist had nearly finished dusting off and straightening up his Fullmetal counterpart's tuxedo. A few times, his hands had passed a bit too close to Ed's personal area for comfort, but he didn't try anything. Not that he hadn't wanted to, but propriety demanded he not get grabby. Not to mention sexual harassment laws. He sighed heavily, cursing those very laws, not to mention their long-dead instigators. All of that would change, of course, once he became Fuhrer. Until then, however…

"We're here, boss," called out to Mustang, breaking him from his reverie. He realized, then, that he had been hanging on to the lapels of Ed's coat for a good minute and a half, just staring off into space. The younger man was obviously uncomfortable with this, given his blushing, and how he averted his gaze. Mustang quickly released him, and finished brushing him off. After this, he got out, and quickly circled the car to let Ed out. Ed took the arm he offered, albeit shyly, and in a manner that indicated surprise.

Roy smirked, and indicated the beautifully-decorated Headquarters with a flourish. "Edward Elric, let me be the first to welcome you to the Officer's Ball."

Alright, sorry for another long wait. I'm out of school now, so I should be able to write much more often. I'd love to get any input you guys have. Thank you, and good night.