Disclaimer. We own nothing, but I own lots of things.
Snodgrass. "Like what?"
Winkle. "Oh, just…things!"
Snodgrass. "What things?
Winkle. "Things I'm not telling you about obviously."
Snodgrass. "So what? I'm still the publisher, and I am still bigger. Na!"
Winkle. (mutters under breath) "All brawn and no brains. Na!"
Snodgrass: "Alright I didn't want to do this, but I'll just have to tell everyone what your initials mean!"
Winkle: " Not fair! You always win!"
Snodgrass: " Teeheeheee!"
qpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqp
Chapter 13
Soapy Cloaks and Penny Armor
qpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqp
Barbara's POV.
Nightfall was approaching, and the orcs seemed to be tiring. The Uruk Hai, like the Energizer Bunny, just kept going and going-and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going and going-but the orcs didn't. In fact they seemed to be continually falling behind, and fierce arguments kept erupting between the two groups.
When they finally stopped, we were unceremoniously dumped at the edge of camp. Now that my arms were free, I gingerly touched my forehead. My probing fingers met an enormous scab that extended from my hairline and extended partly over my right eyebrow.
It didn't hurt as much as before, but I wished I could have had something to wipe the dirt off.
"Are you guys ok?" I asked.
"As good as can be expected I suppose. Barbie, listen. Those odd sounds-I think-just keep listening."
We all looked in the direction of the dark forest, where the orcs were hacking down some trees for firewood. There were low groans and rumbles that sounded every time an axe fell.
"What's making that noise?" Pippin asked, scooting forward a little.
"It's the trees," Merry said, a curious look in his eyes.
"What?"
"Do you remember the Old Forest? On the borders of Buckland? Folk used to say that there was something in the water that made the trees grow tall... and come alive."
Pippin was still lost.
"Alive?"
"Trees that could whisper. Talk to each other. Even move."
We all fell silent after that, just watching the trees, and I must confess I half expected one of them to start walking, or talking in some deep, grumbling tones. But they didn't, and the orcs started an enormous fire with the green branches. That was when the fight over us started.
"Come on, I'm starving. We ain't 'ad nuffin but maggoty bread fer 'free stinking days," one orc whined, glancing our way. I thought " We haven't had anything for three quite smelly days scum."
"Yeah, why can't we 'ave some meat."
The other one jerked his head in our direction "They're fresh."
"They're not for eating!" the Uruk Hai leader ground these words out between his teeth, and I felt a rush of neutral feelings for him. Then another orc stepped forward, a skinny, sly looking one with a scimitar.
"What about their legs? They don't need them. They look tastyyyy." He drew out the "e" sound with malicious delight, noting the hobbits scared faces.
"Get back scum," ordered the leader again, shoving at the eager orcs.
"Carve 'em up!"
"Just a mouthful!"
"No!"
In rage the Uruk leader stepped forward, and in one swift movement beheaded the orc nearest us. His head fell off with a thud and bounced right up to us, smashing up against a sickened Pippin. What followed was worse, as all the orcs and Uruk Hai began to-to devour the fallen orcs, ripping off huge dripping chunks.
"Come on we need to go!" Merry's urgent whisper startled me out of the horrified stupor I had fallen into as the orcs ate. So we began to wiggle away, our hands still tied firmly together. I thought quickly, where are the riders? And where is that one orc that-suddenly I heard a frightened squeak, and looked over to see an orc leaning over the hobbits with long, wicked looking sword. He wasn't looking at me, just leering into Pippin's face.
"Go on, call for help. Squeal! No one's gonna save you now!" he said, placing the tip of his weapon under his chin.
Suddenly, as he seemed about to bear down, a long spear seemed to grow from his chest, and he fell back. Then the entire clearing seemed full of wheeling horses, waving banners and shouting men. I looked frantically around for the hobbits, but they were gone, until I heard a scream from Pippin.
I still couldn't see them, but I had to free myself, I could be trampled at any moment! I dragged myself over to the carcass of the orc, and frantically rubbed my bonds against his sword. When they finally snapped, I jumped up, and tried to find my friends. They were no where to be seen.
The orcs and Uruk Hai were being slaughtered by the Riders, and I tried to find my bow, which they had taken from me. I was almost sure I had seen it on yet another dead body, when I was seized from behind and pulled up by a iron hand. I screamed and tried desperately to free myself, when I was yanked up onto someone's horse, and a hand slick with black blood covered my mouth.
"What are you doing here?" the man hissed, glaring down at me, and pulling his hand away. I wiped disgustedly at my lips, and then was rendered speechless. This man was Eomer. I just stared at him a moment, and he swung me behind him, and I grabbed onto his belt with a (no pun intended) death grip.
"Don't let go it's as much as your life is worth," he yelled, and I believed him as he rode into the thickest of the fray, cutting down the enemy ruthlessly with his enormous sword.
The other Riders rallied around him, and he called out several orders as they slaughtered the orcs and Uruks.
They were no match for the furious fighting of the Riders, and in what seemed in incredibly short time they were all dead, transfixed by spears, impaled by javelins or felled by the sword. I was just watching, open mouthed at their quick work. Foot fighting is much more difficult, and considering how much I despised the orcs, I could only admire the efficiency of fighting from horse back.
"Hoo boy and rama lama ding dong kazooy," I said, whistling in awe. At that point Eomer seemed to realized I was still there, and jumped down from his horse, dragging me with him. That guy has arms like a vise! The other Riders, who were beginning to pile up the bodies, crowded around me, staring at me in open mouthed astonishment, the light of the fire playing over their faces.
"What is a girl doing here?" Eomer asked me again. I felt somewhat intimidated, surrounded by his men and backed up against his horse.
"Ah, you see, me and my friends Merry and Pippin were taken by the Uruk Hai three days ago when we were on a very important quest. It was by the river and our group was attacked. Our other friends were following us, and we were trying to get away when you and your men arrived. They went one way, and I was trying to find my weapons, when you grabbed me Lord Eomer," I said, trying not to look like an idiot.
"You know of me? You are certainly not of our people. You look much more like one of the Easterlings to me," Eomer declared, looking me up and down, as if the word "Easterling" would be printed in block letters on my clothing.
"I'm not, really. I have known about you through-various tales of your valiant deeds, and I am not an Easterling. I am of-West Virginia, a very far away land. Actually I was born in New York, another distant land, but I was raised in West Virginia with my brothers and sisters."
I blurted all this out, the look in his keen eyes seemed to demand to know everything, and here I was, telling him my life history. Eomer was remarkably tall, and broad shouldered, with curiously light brown eyes, and blond/brown hair. He also had a small beard, and was much more of the good-looking commander than P.J. ever showed him to be.
"What of your family? Are they-he hesitated here, as if not wanting to ask some private question. I felt pegged by his gaze, and squirmed a little.
Finally he asked quickly "Are they-alive?" I felt very relieved, and almost laughed.
"Yes-yes quite alive. In fact only my sister is-she is the only one to accompany me on this journey. She got sick and I last left her in Lothlorien with the elves there. She is very safe with them." I said, wishing she were here now.
Eomer stepped back, and shared sideway glances with a few of his men. He seemed to make up his mind about something, and said briskly.
"Very well then. As your friends are not here and neither is your sister, I think you have to stay with us for awhile. Until, of course, we can make other arrangements that would be the safest thing to do. You do know how to ride?"
There was a question in his voice, and I felt my pride prickled. I was also extremely apprehensive. If I said I could ride and then made a complete fool of myself in front of Eomer, the dude in charge of the Horse Lords-I was absolutely going to fall upon a sword, or however they say "suicide."
"Yes, I do actually. Not perfectly, but I do know how. I'm not going to fall off, if that what you mean." Eomer shook his head in an admonishing manner.
"I meant no such thing, so you can smooth down your rumpled feathers right now-you haven't introduced yourself so you'd better do so."
Feeling rather foolish for being so uptight ( please give me some leeway here, the last few days haven't exactly been peachy) I said " My name is Barbara Grace Paul, but everyone calls me Barb, or Barbie because they don't want to take the trouble to say Barbara."
We shook hands, and I was so glad to do that. You do get rather tired of formal greetings after awhile, and a simple, firm handshake means more than any of those.
"Oh, and thanks for rescuing me and my friends. Pippin was about to be cut open when one of your men cut down the orc with a spear. I'm not sure which, it happened so quickly. He did a pretty good job of it too."
Eomer smiled slightly "Yes, I have an idea of who that would be, but we should not delay here any longer than we have to destroy the bodies. You can help us if you don't mind touching something dead."
"Ok, I'm in. I have to find my bow that they swiped, the disgusting things," I said, and grinned back at Eomer.
It was great to find someone who expected me to pitch in and help, sort of like family, instead of guests. As we began to drag the heavy bodies into the pile, he helped me sort through them in search of my weapon, actually talking with me like-like I was older, not some silly younger sister of Emily, because of course, she wasn't here.
"Good. We can see about that nasty looking scab on your forehead later, I don't think it's really dangerous. I'll warrant it hurt when it happened though. How'd you come by it?" he asked, tossing aside a no-good helmet.
"I had a fight with a tree. The tree won," I said simply, and I heard quiet guffaws from some of the other men.
qpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqp
Emily's POV
"..all I have is borrowed clothes, an independent Marchwarden and a sister within born archery skills." I said. I had made up with Haldir an hour ago and we once again rode side by side.
"But that is where your wrong Lady Emily. Barbara's abilities are anything but her own. You may even say she borrowed them." answered Haldir.
"What exactly to you mean? I think I have an inkling but go on."
"When she was wounded by the Nazgul she was saved by the Life's Grace of the Prince of Mirkwood, correct?"
"Yes, but I don't see any connection….oh!"
Haldir smiled at my exclamation as I suddenly understood. "When Legolas gave her that ring he also gave her some of his own life experience. Thus she has this seemly amazing abilities with a bow. I have heard of such cases before and sadly they do not always end as happily as your sister's has."
That was disturbing and I asked what he meant about them not all ending happily.
"Some elves experience dreams and relive painful events in the life of the other person. It is always a chance of the worst happening and so it is rarely done, but in extreme circumstances like you sisters. Luckily Barbara has inherited Legolas's remarkable archery skills."
"So any talent I possess is my own?" I asked we were nearing a large black forest and I wanted to keep close to the Marchwarden.
"Yes, but they were cultivated by others and if not they may have lain dormant for all you life." replied Haldir seriously.
We rode in silence after that and about mid day we found our way into the forest. Only this one was dark and gloomy with shaggy brown moss hanging in stringy lengths off the branches. As soon as we entered a singular mood settled over the elves.
Suddenly, I felt very human, for as the gloom depressed my spirits it seemed to uplift that of the elves. They glowed brighter and their eyes shone with a quiet contentment even behind the gleaming gold of their curved helmets.
As dusk fell around us a strange thing happened, a luminous light rose and fell with every step the elves took. The horses shook their bridles and shuffled softly and in reply the trees swayed and groaned. With every movement of the ancient plants the attitude of the Elder grew more joyous. I could see it in their lightened step and the tiny smile that tugged at the corners of Haldir's mouth.
He reached out and plucked a minute flower from a nest of moss. He stuck it into the mane of his ugly steed and I think the horse liked it!
We stopped at about 8:40 and a piece of lembas was handed to me. It was thin, flat and shaped like a triangle. I examined it for a long time before actually eating it.
There was always something that bothered me about the lembas in PJ's movies. In the first scene that appears it looks very much like what I have in my hand right now. But later when Sam and Frodo are in Mordor its thick and crumbly. I had always wondered where along the way the delicate wafer I held had mutated into the dried out chucks the hobbits had. No wonder they had such a hard time getting to Mt. Doom they were living on stale bread!
I finally took a bit and chewed thoughtfully. It tasted like pistachio, or rather bread made out of milled pistachio nuts. Then being thirsty I sled off Pigeon and went in search of water. However instead of drinking the water that we had in canteens I drank the icy water from a nearby pool in the roots of a tree.
"Lady Emily!"
I turned at Haldir's sharp call excepting something to be ready to behead me. Instead I found him staring at me intently.
"What? What did I do?" I asked. He looked at me and then at the water in the pool and then at me again as if he was waiting for me to do a trick of some kind.
"Is something wrong?" I asked.
"No, but the water of Fangorn is not good for drinking." He said still staring at me strangely. I backed away from the pool and asked if it was going to kill me so something.
"I think not, it would take more then enchanted water to kill you." he said dryly.
Later I sat next to him as the guard went on their rounds and sang quietly as they did so. I leaned tiredly into the curve of the Marchwarden's shoulder, and reflected on the life I had been living for the last month and a half.
I had brushed by death a million times, had endured more pain than ever before in my life. And experienced the death of a comrade even if we weren't close.
But also I had grown to love and beloved by folk who hold a nobler standard and reach ever for that which is praiseworthy and honorable. Wise and great are the deeds they live to perform, and their devotion to this inspires a similar desire in your own heart. If I could even be half of what these great people are I would have won a prize indeed.
Now as sleep begins to claim me, I bury my nose in the cloak Haldir wrapped around me. It is the fabled red cloak and I breathed in the smell. You know how it is when you visit a friends house and everything in the house smells different? That's kind of what Haldir's cloak smelled like, different.
Being an elf he doesn't sweat and also being an elf he is always clean. So I guess the best way to describe the scent was to say it was rather soapy.
Wrapped in a soapy smelling cloak and falling asleep against the rock hard shoulder of the Warden was strangely comforting. The ground was probably softer, but Haldir was officially my friend and I wouldn't have moved for the world.
"Thank you I appreciate that." he said in answer to my thoughts.
"You're quite welcome dear Warden, now let me be. I'm trying to sleep."
"Very well, sweet dreams."
"Ditto."
qpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqp
Barbara's POV
…and it's the horsemen's life for me!
After we had done with burning the carcasses and I had found my bow and quiver, we left, heading about the same direction I had just come from. Well, I hoped so. I always have been a bit absentminded, y'know, I'm the type that makes those useless Yahoo maps. L.
I must have been running on adrenaline, because I talked like a maniac the entire rest of the night (I was riding with Eomer and he didn't seem to care) and then when the sun came up, I leaned against his armor (which smelled kind of like a hot penny) and fell asleep. Not really asleep, just that kind of resting where you're still somewhat conscious of your surroundings. My surroundings are….horses…the sun heating up my dark hair like a frying pan…my quiver jouncing up and down my back…I'm getting tired of having to hang on to Eomer…
I shake myself awake. I can't fall off, I'd probably end up impaled on one of those nasty looking spears. Yuck!
"Eomer, I think you better talk to me, or else I'm going to fall asleep and then I'll fall off your horse and then I'll be impaled on a spear," I said, gently poking his elbow.
"You're rather strange," he said, glancing back at me " What do you want me to talk about?"
I thought blurrily for a few moments, but all I could recall was one of those stupid "questions for teenagers to ask their parents" I had seen on a pizza box once.
"What did you like to do when you were my age?" I asked, shifting around a little.
"How old are you?" Eomer inquired.
"Sixteen." I mumbled "How old are you? I never really could tell, especially with your beard. It's so hard to guess that way. Is that why you do it? Grow a beard I mean?"
Eomer kindly ignored these odd ramblings of a sleep deprived brain, and answered my first questions.
"I am twenty-four years old, and my favorite thing to do when I was sixteen? Probably trying to tease my sister. She really was magnificent whenever she would get angry. That's why I did it of course, but she always got me back afterwards."
He laughed softly to himself, but it really wasn't a happy laugh. More of a "I'm remembering happier days of yore" laugh. I felt stupid for asking the question, and thought perhaps that it would be best to change the subject.
"What is your horses name?" I asked rather irrelevantly.
"Firefoot," he said, and gently ran his fingers along the horses mane.
"That is-a good name," I commented approvingly "It co-notates respect and confusion at the same time. Respect, in the fact that it probably means that this horse has a high power drive, and confusion in the sense that you can't really be sure of that."
"I thought so too, but if you are wondering if he has a-high powered drive-yes, he is a remarkably fast horse, even for Rohan. He also doesn't mind the weight of armor, and courage is his second name."
Apparently I had picked the right subject, and he went into a spiel that sounded like a complete history of Rohan's horses, and about how they were the best horses you could possibly want, ever, anywhere, at any time, and anyone who said differently was obviously a fool. I was falling back asleep, but managed another question.
"What about Elvish horses? Isn't there supposed to be something special about them, too?"
"NO!" Eomer spat this word out quite vehemently, as if this was particularly touchy subject with him. "Yes, I know the elves say that since they have had thousands of years to breed them, they have to be better somehow. I don't think so. They're just too….placid somehow. And whenever they think they know better then you, they do it. But they never seem to get angry, they just stare at you in that irritating way and--" he stopped, and took a deep breath, and finished, in a quieter voice "I'm sorry for shouting. But Rohan has the best horses, and when the subject is brought up, sometimes I get a little-testy."
"Good!" I said with satisfaction "I'm so sick of complete stolidity. I think at times it's best to say it how it is." We nodded simultaneously.
"My sentiments exactly." I looked at Eomer with new appreciation. He and I thought very much alike, this horse lord or whatever his official title was. Then…I fell asleep.
I was awoken at an indeterminate time later, by Eomer nudging me with his armored elbow. I swatted it away, and sat up straight.
"What'd you wake me up for? Is it an earthquake or something?" I said, trying to peer around him.
"It's a group in the distance. It looks like a four people running like a Balrog was on their heels," Eomer said "Hold on, we're going to be going a bit faster now."
I grabbed tightly onto him, and we took off, this was a "bit" faster? Wait a second! Four people running! Four!
"What do they look like?" I asked. " I can't see anything! Agh!"
"It's-two men, an elf and-a dwarf!" There was a definite question in Eomer's tones.
"That sounds like them! Eomer, I think it's my friends, the ones I told you about! I can't see anything!" I wailed helplessly. Then we pulled to a sudden halt, and I hit my chin on his armor OUCH! Then I heard a very familiar voice.
"Rider of Rohan! What news from the Mark?"
"ARAGORN!" I shrieked out his name, and slid awkwardly off of Firefoot. I ran forward a few steps, and then stopped.
There was indeed Aragorn, looking exhausted, dirty, and quite rangerly then. There also was Legolas, who was also (shock and astonishment!) also disheveled and tired, as well as Gimli, who looked-well, he was Gimli. But in the middle, messy, but very much alive…was Boromir.
I think they were was as astonished as I was at that moment, and it was like someone had pressed a celestial pause button, and we were all frozen.
"Barbara what are you doing?" Eomer, with these words, hit "play."
"Boromir! You're alive! Where are the others!"
"What are you doing with these people?"
"Are they alive?"
There was a babble of confused voices as we all tried to say something. I was crying, and hugging Boromir, and apologizing and looking at him just to make sure he really was there, and crying some more.
"I'm sorry," I gasped out "I didn't want to do it, but you would have been dead and I couldn't, and I'm sorry, and I'm glad, and I'm really, really sorry and I just can't believe you're alive!"
"What are you talking about? Barbara, try and control yourself, I'm absolutely fine except for the fact that I've been worried sick the past few days. Where are Merry and Pippin?"
The others quieted down, and looked expectantly at me. I wiped my eyes, hiccupped once, and took a deep breath.
"Alright, the orcs and Uruk Hai made camp and we just about became the main dish, but they ate an orc instead and we tried to get away and then another orc tried to eat us but then Lord Eomer and his men arrived and so we were saved. Be grateful to them. And I was separated from the hobbits and Eomer rescued me, and they're fine and I know exactly where they are. So you don't have to yell, kick any helmets or anything because they're in Fangorn forest."
"Did you say-Fangorn forest?" Legolas, who was also looking relieved, also looked intrigued " How do you know this?"
"I saw them go in that direction and-Merry told me," I said, adding this last as a firm statement.
"Who are these people?" Eomer broke into our happy little reunion. Aragorn stepped forward now.
"I am Aragorn son of Arathorn. This is Gimli son of Gloin, Legolas of the Woodland Realm, and Boromir of Gondor, the Steward Denethor's son. We are friends of Rohan and of Theoden, its King."
"Theoden no longer recognized friend from foe. Not even his own kin." Eomer answered, a harsh note of bitterness creeping into his tones "Saruman has poisoned the mind of the king and claim lordship over this land. My company are those loyal to Rohan. And for that, we are banished. The White Wizard is cunning. He walks here and there they say, as an old man, hooded and cloaked."
Sounds like Gandalf to me I thought, hiding a secretive smile. Even sixteen year old girls, who look like a punk rocker because of a bandage wrapped around their head, can be mysterious if they want too.
Then Eomer gave us three (Yes three, what did you expect, Boromir and Aragorn to double up or something?) horses, for what reason I am still not sure. He said something about " aiding us on our search" or something along those lines. Personally, I think it is because I am was so charming, but others may disagree.
I felt sorry to leave Eomer and his men so soon. Without them, I and Merry and Pippin would have been orc food. What a repulsive thought!
"Bye Eomer! Many thanks and happy riding!" I called as we rode away, and he waved back.
We're off to the see the Wizard, the wonderful Wizard of Fangorn!
qpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqpqp
Slayer3 : (Doing the happy dance) Yahoo! A new reader and reviewer! Rock girl! And yes we are the askew police! I can just see Haldir in a modern day version of "Bad Boys" and being an askew policeman. Keep Reading!
Annamariah: ( Snodgrass looking longingly into mirror at the sight of a new suit in shade of mauve and gold) "What? Oh yes a review. Well thanks awfully and please keep giving your lovely long reviews! Fix it fix it!"
Crazyroninchic: " If you are insane you'll join in the party perfectly! Keep reading!
Ty-Kwan-Do: " Thanks for the complements! We always need them as both Winkle and I have inferiority complexes"