One More Try by Betty Bokor
Sam/Daniel. Daniel has a heartbreaking secret and needs to share it with Sam.
Spoilers: All seasons, including 9 and 10.
Disclaimer: The Stargate original characters belong to MGM/Showtime, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Film Corp. This was written strictly for the purpose of entertainment. No attempt at copyright infringement has been made.

One More Try

Chapter 8

On Thursday morning Sam took Cassie shopping. Because of the wedding, the new couple had been given time off until the following Monday. They told Cassie that after so many years of friendship and after having been living together, they did not plan on a honeymoon. They preferred to spend time with her as long as she could stay in Colorado.

All morning long Cassie tried to find out little bits of information about their relationship. Sam worked around the truth as best as she could. She did not want to lie to her young friend, but she could not tell her the whole story either.

Every time Cassie was trying something on or searching in a different section of a store, Sam's mind invariably went to the night before. She had not really slept at all. She had too much in her mind to even close her eyes. The problem was their Practice make-out session, as she had named it for future reference, or as Daniel had put it –taking advantage of his linguistic ability– Precalentamiento. She had looked for the word in the Spanish dictionary this morning and found it meant warm-ups. She had been surprised that he had chosen a sports-related term, but she had not failed to notice the multiple possible interpretations of the word. Although Daniel blushed for many reasons, he was never scared of using words. They were his best weapon.

However, her main concern was not as much its name, as how deeply she had enjoyed it. She was certain that over the years she had not seen Daniel as a sexual being. She had always put Jack under that category. She seemed to remember that she had felt Daniel's masculinity very strongly the day she met him. She already admired him before the trip and one look at him on Abydos had sent her imagination flying. The whole Sha're tragedy had stopped those feelings very fast.

The night before it had been different. She had realized to what extent she had been hoping to become Daniel's wife in the whole sense of the word. Compared to what she saw in Daniel now, Jack was as attractive as… a penguin, she had concluded.

Daniel had taken the warm-up experience half-seriously –that kind of kiss had to be serious– and half- jokingly, laughing and making funny comments when things started to get out of hand. He had explained the need of precalentar in order to avoid terrible awkwardness at the time of trying conception. According to his plan, they needed to get used to each other's touch.

Cassie interrupted her thoughts again. She had purchased the final item of her list and they could head home to have lunch with Daniel.

After Cassie left on Saturday afternoon, things went back to normal. Daniel reclaimed the guestroom and they stopped the practice sessions. Sam could have regretted it if she had not feeling awful on account of the last medicine cocktails she had been taking. She had also been charting her temperature and many other responses of her body. The sicker she felt, the sicker Daniel got. He had high fevers almost daily, horrible headaches, and, she believed but could not prove, brief episodes of blindness. He stoically suffered it all, hiding his symptoms as bests as possible, without one complaint, and managing the SGC Linguistics and Anthropology Departments as efficiently as ever. He even had a major role in a couple of discoveries that further enhanced their fighting capacity against the Ori and the remaining Goa'uld System Lords.

Dr. Lam constantly insisted that what he needed was a hiatus in his job, to take time with Sam and enjoy their marriage. Daniel vehemently refused and affirmed that he was going to work until the day he dropped dead. Carolyn was certain that was where his path was inexorably leading him, so she decided to talk some sense into him. Roughly two weeks after the wedding, she called Daniel to her office.

"Dr. Jackson," she started vehemently. "I've called you today because there are certain aspects of your condition that I'd like to discuss with you." He did not answer or show any emotion, so she continued. "In the last weeks we've proven beyond any doubt the correlation between your mental state and mood, and your symptoms. It's been clear that excessive worry, depression, or any other negative emotion, have only exacerbated your symptoms. On the other hand, a light mood, or simply being in good spirits, has made your symptoms almost disappear. Yet, we both know that situation has only been concealing the real issue at stake here. Your tumor has not ceased growing. Its growth is causing compression in the areas of your brain that surround it. The compression in turn causes cerebral edema; you understand, your brain is swelling…" Daniel nodded and she carried on. "Subsequently, the swelling increases the intracranial pressure and-"

"And my brain cells are dying by the minute. They can't regenerate, so," he took a deep breath and finished, "it can only get worse."

She could see the effort Daniel was putting into being objective about his situation. "I just want you to be warned. The inflammation of your brain will bring out more symptoms. The headaches will be accompanied by nausea and vomiting. Then, the second most common occurrence in these cases, the seizures, with involuntary loss of muscle control, consciousness, and/or sensation." Daniel kept patiently paying attention with no signs of distress. "I know you've had vision problems, even though you haven't officially reported them," he still did not move a muscle, "and you have probably experienced weakness of the arms and/or legs. Lastly, you will most likely have problems with recent memory and inability to concentrate."

"I understand," he finally replied.

"Then, if you truly understand, you should be doing something better with the time you have left." He looked at her with an unreadable expression and she decided to play all her cards. "You've already saved this world, and others, many times, Dr. Jackson. It's time to save yourself. Take advantage of this chance. Most men in this facility die without even acknowledging their time has come. Stop giving and take a little. Take time with your wife, with your friends, with your favorite book if it makes you happy. You've done your job and you've done it well. History will undoubtedly recognize your contribution." She stood up and walked to Daniel; she indicated him to stand up and opened the door. "Go and be happy, please. You deserve it more than anyone else I know."

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