All I wanted was to erase my past.

All he wanted to do was relive it.

And then he came along, and he wanted me to do it all.

Sold Love

I never wanted to watch him crumble. Ever since that divorce, he was a different person- a monster. He would wake up every night breaking things as if that would make him feel better, get drunk in any alcohol to numb the pain away, and search in through me that I never had.

Marks of beauty and pain came up my wrist one by one- first from curiosity to the recent attempt of death. I don't know how it became like this. Where I made the wrong turn, when everything fell down to drown into that pit.

Then a new day came.

He was now out, free- out of that 10 years sentence of Child Abuse.

I didn't know how to react when he opened that door. He didn't change at all. The way he'd just fling open that door, how he let anger control him, come and grab me like a dog thrown out in the streets- no, it was stupid for me to believe.

Have hope, faith that someday I would be saved-that he would at least be somewhat different than the person, monster he became.

He shouted at me, asked me how I was after I called on the police- sending him to hell for all he cares.

I held his wrist, asking myself if I should break it or not.

Then he grabbed my hair and I twitched, remembering all that pain he poured onto me.

And for some reason…my eyes started to mingle with tears. Then through those tears I saw a blurry image of what I loved the most.

Friends…

Their smile like none other, how they would understand everything I was and am. But they didn't know this part about me. That spitted wrist, those hungry bruises- no, they knew nothing of me.

He then threw me to the wall, and that's the only thing I remember.

"You awake…?"

Instead of an irritated voice, something somewhat pleasant greeted me. Before I opened my eyes I tried to feel the comfort, the warmth behind me. Then smell of food was near, my body was already used to the relief, and soaked in all the tenderness around me.

I lifted my head, opened my eyes and I saw the same being.

The same being that once called out my name to ask me what I wanted for Christmas, the same being that used to make me airplanes, the same being that tried his best to keep me safe in the rain…and yet, the same being that once hit me so hard I bled to the floor, the same being that used to shout curses to my emotional, mental senses, and the same being that tried to kill me, destroy me.

I cried again. This feeling of mourning and such devotion all at once- came in and almost ate me alive. It hurts…so much, and it comforts…too much.

I tried to stay focus, just in case he snaps again.

"Y-Yeah."

"I made some soup. Do you want some Katsuya?"

"N-No. I'm fine."

He looked at me for a while and I thought he would finally crack.

"Okay. There's some in the pot, just heat it. I'll be out just to get me some cigarettes."

I watched his every move, as he grabbed his jacket, took the keys, and leave.

What was this?

I was so confused. Was my prayer answered in the time I fainted? He was him- a father, not a monster, he was him.

I felt my lips match, lifting them cheek to cheek. I felt myself smile.

My body was still sore from before, I slowly raised my body to walk to the kitchen, to smell the soup that he made for me.

I decided to eat a bowl and wash it after.

But whatever it was, I didn't want to question- I maybe earned something.

He came back with a smile.

"Hey Katsuya, did you eat the soup?"

"Yeah."

I tried to reply shortly, just so I'll limit every words I say.

"You wanna go for a walk?"

Outside, to the public, some where the air mingled to your nose, where your nose can get red from the cold breeze- together.

"Y-yeah!"

I grabbed my jacked, wore my shoes and walked out. His body wasn't as big as it used to be. I would always cling to him and now…he somehow needed me to cling to.

"Let's get a drink."

I looked at him. If he'd drink, things could get bad. He might turn to that monster again. He might grab that knife again, and he might-

"I promise I won't drink a lot."

"…"

"You can stop me anytime."

I had nothing to lose- just a spare time to earn.

I nodded and he smiled, pulled out a cigarette, even offered me one.

We both took sip of this poisonous pleasure. He smiled and I smiled back.

When we arrived at the bar, there was barely anyone there. Classic music was on, and the bartender smiled to greet us.

"Welcome."

He walked to the front table and sat in front.

"Anything to drink?"

"Some beer, the finest you have for both."

He ordered and I nodded. The drink came out soon enough and we both took sips and gulps.

I wanted this, every moment of it.

"Have you ever tried drugs Katsuya?"

I looked at him, just looked at him at this random question. But yes, he did. He used to do anything illegal.

"No."

"…"

He gulped down his beer and just slowly closed his eyes.

"I did…and once I did…it was-"

I just watched him.

"heaven."

He finished his sentence and opened his eyes.

"That's why…I need you to help me."

What…?

"I need you to help your poor, selfish dad."

My mouth was cupped, along with my nose, I muffled out my loudest shout.

"You should know this though, Katsuya. I only tried to kill you because I loved you."

How can someone whisper of killing and loving in the same breath?

And soon I was blindfolded- grabbed by men, thrown to a trunk and driven away.

"We're here."

I heard the men talk to each other as they carry me upstairs.

"I think he wanted him in the room in the left."

"Throw him in there then."

One of them laughed, as they actually threw me down to a room. I groaned, felt piercing pain on my left waist.

What the hell was going to happen to me?

From the sound of footsteps they walked away. Leaving me there alone, covered in the wet blindfold soaked by tears, pressuring ropes around me that seem to stop the blood from flowing, and mental pain that made me think of what was the worst.

I woke up in a lighter room, I was obviously free from all those utensils. The room was huge, but had enough furniture to keep me company. The bed I was in felt like a piece of cloud that healed all my wounds. I looked at my body and I was dressed in clean, new clothes. My head still ached, my body still sensitive from severe shock but otherwise I can manage.

I slid off the bed, reached for the door when suddenly the door opened to hit my head.

"OW. Shit."

I cursed under my breath, quickly rubbed my forehead to ease the pain. I looked up, hearing a smirk and a snicker.

"Excuse me."

His voice was cold but was joking. I looked up to argue then I saw his face.

Blue, cold eyes- deep and far as you can go, shining and somewhat glaring at me.

"U-Uh."

"About time you got up."

"Who are you?"

He smirked again. Damn, it's pissing me off.

"Your master, mutt."

EXCUSE ME?

New story…hope you enjoyed! Read and Review me some ideas. THANKS! I'll do my best :)